Tag: Emotions

  • Spinoza’s Ethics of Strength of the Emotions in W Somerset Maughm’s Of Human Bondage

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    The writer probes on the complex world of W. Somerset Maughm’s protagonist in the novel Of Human Bondage, using the propositions the Jewish Portuguese philosopher Baruch Spinoza postulated in his book Ethics in 1674. Some of Spinoza’s propositions are as follows( Morgan, 2006, pp 108-120):

    The following propositions of Spinoza enlighten the changing character of Philip in his own bildungsromans of his life. The force and increase of any passive emotion and its persistence in existing is defined not by the power whereby we ourselves endeavour to persist in existing, but by the power of external causes compared with our own power;

    The force of any passive emotion can surpass the rest of man’s activities or power so that the emotion stays firmly fixed in him;

    An emotion cannot be checked or destroyed except by a contrary emotion which is stronger than the emotion which is to be checked;

    Knowledge of good and evil is nothing other than the emotion of pleasure or pain insofar as we are conscious of it;

    An emotion whose cause we think to be with us in the present is stronger than it would be if we did not think the said cause to be with us;

    We are affected toward a future thing which we imagine to be imminent mo intensely than if we were to imagine its time of existence tofarther away from the present. We are also affected by a remembrance of a thing we imagine to belong to the near past more intensely if we were to imagine it to belong to the distant past;

    An emotion toward a thing which we think of as inevitable [necessarius] is more intense, other things being equal, than emotion toward a thing possible or contingent, that is, not inevitable;

    Emotion toward a thing which we know not exist in the present, and which we imagine to be possible, is, other things being equal, more intense than emotion toward a contingent thing;

    Emotion toward a contingent thing which we know not to exist in the present, is, other things being equal, feebler than emotion toward a thing past;

    No emotion can be checked by the true knowledge of good and evil, insofar as it is true, but only insofar as it is;

    Desire that arises from the true knowledge of good and evil can be extinguished or checked by many other desires that arise from the emotions by which we are assailed;

    The desires that arises from a knowledge of good and evil insofar as this knowledge has regard to to the future can be the more easily checked or extinguished by desire of things that are attractive in the present;

    Desire that arises from the true knowledge of good and evil insofar as this knowledge is concerned with contingent things can be even more easily checked by desire for things which are present;

    Desire arising from pleasure is, other things being equal, stronger than desire arising from pain;

    Every man, from the laws of his nature, necessarily seeks or avoids what he judges to be good or evil.

    The more every man endeavours and is able to seek advantage, that is, to preserve his own being, the more he is endowed with virtue. On the other hand insofar as he neglects to preserve what is to his advantage, that is, his own being to that extent he is weak.

    Philip is highly affected by nature. There is in Nature no individual thing that is surpassed in strength and power by some other thing. Whatsoever thing there is, there is another more powerful by which the said thing can be destroyed. And he was able to surpass all his problems because of the incoming different emotions, problems which proved to make him stronger if not released from “Human Bondage”.

    The force whereby a man persist in existing is limited, and infinitely surpassed by the power of external causes.

    Philip’s deformity limits his own persistence to live. But his meeting with Hayward, Clutton and Lawson, his former classmates in France, who taught him that life is all about passion and the pursuit of it, he became engross in his art. France did not also care about his clubfoot. Cronshaw taught him more philosophy in life about living in let live. Cronshaw even on his death bed, defied doctors’ prohibition. His life is anyway to end just like any other’s lives.

    Set in Kent, England, a sub-urban near London, the novel presents the multifaceted personal, social, political and religious experiences of Philip carey from his childhood to his middle age of thirty. A bildungsroman (1991, Smiley) in style, which highlights the formation of a youngman’s character through education, travels and early life experiences. Philip at the age of nine, as a young boy, is set apart from his peers by some misfortune and undergoes a humiliating experience that later proves strengthening. his first experience of love is unsuccessful or problematic one that nevertheless paves the way to a happy marriage with a suitable mate. The novel has ample observation, if not criticism, with the character’s institutions such as schools, churches and class structures.

    Philip’s personal life is truly an amalgam of life’s tragedies. But how he surpassed the seemingly insurmountable heap of oppressing weight, if not the meaninglessness or nothingness of life, is the focus of this attempt anchored on Spinoza’s propositions. To enumerate, at an early age, his mother died of tuberculosis and his father, a medical doctor, died of lung cancer. His innocence never understood the situation. He has only the temporary joy of travelling to Blackstable to live with his uncle William and childless Auntie Louisa. Forcibly liking his second family as an orphan, he is left reading his books without noise for his uncle, a Vicar in the community, is irated with children’s unruly behaviour. Aunt Louisa is incapable of understanding Philip. he is left with the care of the governess. His personal disability or deformity, being born with a club-foot, proves to be the stigma of his life forever. His early education in Kingston School, caused his early childhood bitter as his peers laughed at him, mocked and physically abused him because of his physical abnormality. Then, his adolescence which brings him to Heidelberg, Germany to study foreign languages, is never sweet. Girls chided him for his deformity. the consolation is meeting friends like Hayward and Miss Wilkinson, who flirted with him, to his disgust. His sojourn to France, albeit, his uncle’s disappointment, proves to be annihilating. His lack of talent in painting plus his deformity, made him a mediocre student. His classmate Fanny Price, who fell in love with him, on the pretext of sharing the same abnormality (hers is lack of beauty), committed suicide out of hunger and wretchedness.

    Then everything escalated to its height, when realizing that painting is not his passion, he goes back to England. He decides to change again to pursue what his uncle William tells him to do: to follow the footsteps of his father. To be a doctor. feeling he has nothing to do, he embraces the new idea. Sauntering along the Parliamentary Street of London, he is driven to dine in a cafe where he meets the slatternly waitress Mildred Rogers who awakens his sexual desire. But his languid mien, caused by his club-foot proves to be a disadvantage. the waitress prefers rugged and rich men. But his desire to pursue the pale, anaemic, aloof Mildred, beomes a challenge to him. Gradually, the two becomeclose. But the ambitious and materialistic waitress always insults him because of his deformity. to slander him cripple, would totally “cripple” his mood and emotion. Even when Philip is generous to the moody Mildred, she hurt him by marrying a German businessman Miller. His desperation is tantamount to his yearning for Mildred. He is left believing that one day, he would see Mildred again. His concentration with his medical study is forlorned. And Mildred came back,looking sickly, with a child. His generosity and forgiveness for his first love, who hurts him the most, is even greater than life. The ingrate waitress after a little recovery from poverty, elopes with Griffith, Philip’s handsome and robust classmate. That is the height of Mildred’s shamelessness. So her expected return is welcomed with derision by the newly awakened Philip. Even when Mildred turns into a prostitute, Philip is only capable of compassion, without passion or sexual desire. She is freed at last. And Philip is extricated from the pains excruciatingly caused by the destitute Mildred.

    His obsession to Mildred costs Philip his fortune and gradually his savings is left with seven pounds. He is forced to stop from his medical studies that brings him to experience unbelievable poverty. He meets the generous Athelneys who fed and sheltered him in his misery. His uncle’s death, leaving an average fortune, helps him to finish his medical studies. His fateful shelter with the Athelneys brings him to his final, harmonious and peaceful resolution to marry Sally Athelney and go on with his life beautifully. Shakespeare is affirmed by saying that “all is well that ends well.

    At this juncture, it is noteworthy to enumerate Spinoza’s propositions to elucidate Philip’s “bondage” and his strength of his emotion. Spinoza in his preface to his philosophical treatise wrote:

    I assign the term “bondage” to man’s lack of power to control and check the emotions. For a man at the mercy of his emotions is not his own master but is subject to fortune, in whose power he so lies that he is often compelled, although he sees the better course, to pursue the worse. In this Part I have set myself the task of demonstrating why is so, and also what is good and what is bad in emotions. But before I begin, I should like to make a few preliminary observations on perfection and imperfection, and on good and bad ( Morgan, 2006).

    In the beginning, Philip is a slave if not a victim of his emotion. His physical deformity, his club-foot, caused him too much pain. He learned to hate his classmates and,worst, abandoned his belief in God. He could not appreciate the God of his uncle vicar when God cannot give him the miracle he wanted to have normal feet. His painful childhood in school changed him to be rough character. He never wanted to become a vicar anymore. His obsession to Mildred indeed showed his real weakness as a man, and even wretchedness as a human being because of his deformity. he would always think that women cannot love him as he is because of his deformity.

    He who has undertaken something and has brought it to completion will say that the thing is completed; and not only he but everyone who rightly knew, or thought he knew, the intention and aim of the author of that work. For example, if anyone sees a work (which I assumed is not yet finished) and knows that the aim of author is to build a house, he will say the house is imperfect. On the other hand, as soon as he sees that the work has been brought to the conclusion that its author had intended to give it, he will say that the house is perfect. But if anyone sees a work whose like he had never seen before, and he does not know the artifecer’s intention, he cannot possibly know whether the work is perfect or imperfect.

    This appears to have been the original meaning of these terms. But when men began to form general ideas and to devise ideal type of houses, buildings, towers, and so on, and to prefer some models to others, it came about that each called “perfect” that which he saw at variance with his own preconceived ideal, although in the artifecer’s opinion it had been fully completed. There seems to be no other reason why even natural phenomena (those not made by human hand) should commonly be called perfect or imperfect. For men there are wont to form general ideas both natural phenomena and artifacts, and these ideas they regard as models, and they believed that Nature (which they consider does nothing without an end in view) looks to this ideas and holds them before herself as models. So when they see something occurring in Nature at variance with their preconceived ideal of the thing in question, they believed that Nature has then failed or blundered and has left that thing imperfect from their own preconceptions rather than from true knowledge.

    So perfection and imperfection are in reality only models of thinking, notions which we are wont to invent from comparing individuals of the same species or kind; and it is for this reason that I previously said (Def. 6, II) that by reality and perfection I mean the same thing. For we are wont to classify all the individuals in Nature under one genus which is called the highest genus, namely, the notion of Entity, which pertains to all the individuals in Nature without exception. Therefore insofar as we classify individuals in Nature under this genus and compare them with one another and find that some have more being or reality than others, to that extent we say that some are more perfect than the others. And insofar as we attribute to them something involving negotiation, such as limit, end, impotence and so on, to that extent we call them imperfect because they do not affect our minds as much as those we call perfect, and not because they lack something of anything except that which follows from the necessity of nature of its efficient cause; and whatever follows from the necessity of the nature of its efficient cause must be necessarily be so.

    To be a master of his emotion is to attain perfection. It may not be physical but spiritual, mental and emotional. His challenges may have hardened him but enlightened him to loosen up and later, embrace the beauty of life. The unattainable perfection, was answered, through his friend Cronshaw, a poet whom he met in France, that the meaning of life cannot be answered unless one lives it. he realized that men are born, study, work, marry, have children and die is the most beautiful pattern that the Persian rug edifies.

    As for the terms “good” and “bad,” they likewise indicate nothing positive in things considered in themselves, and nothing but models of thinking, or notions which we form from comparing things with one another. For one and the same thing can at the same time be good and bad, and also indifferent. For example, music is good for one who is melancholy, bad for one in mourning, and neither good or bad for the deaf. However, although this is so, these terms ought to be retained. For since we desire to form the idea of man which we may look to as model of human nature, we shall find it useful to keep these terms in the sense I have indicated. So in what follows I shall mean by “good” that which we certainly know to be the means for our approaching nearer to the model of human nature that we set before ourselves, and by “bad” that which we certainly know prevents us from reproducing the said model. For it is important to note that when I say somebody passes from a state of less perfection, to a state of greater perfection, and vice versa, I do not mean that he changes from one essence or to form to another (for example, a horse is as completely destroyed if it changes into a man as it would be if it were to change into an insect), but that we conceive his power of activity, insofar as this is understood through his nature, to be increased or diminished.

    Philip may have been both good and bad due to circumstances. he was good in the Blackstable with his Auntie Louisa and Uncle William. he became bad in school because his classmates taunted him because of his clubfoot. In Heidelberg, he is good to all the people even if he did not understand their silence and even their insolence. In France, was forced to become bad, to protect himself from the looming abuses of other foreigners. The death of an anti-social fanny Price, showed him to be the only compassionate painting student.

    Hence, after a series of Philip’s tragedy, his experiences, his meeting with different people, his education, his travel to Heidelberg, to Paris and to London, his affluence and reversal of his fortune to poverty taught him greatest lessons in life. That life can be beautiful if man knows to master his emotion, moderate his desire and be reasonable in every decision. A man is finally freed from the chains and cufflinks ” Of Human Bondage”.

    References:

    Maughm, Somerset W. (1991). Of Human Bondage.

    Canada: Bantam Book Doubleday.

    Morgan, Michael (ed.). (2006). The Essential Spinoza: Ethics And Related Writings.

    Cambridge: Hackett Publishing, Inc.

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    Source by Wilfredo M. Valois

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  • The Four Horsemen of Marital Apocalypse

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    Stop to consider your last fight with your spouse. The exact subject may escape you at the moment. We understand. After a while, the spats – over bills, your job, in-laws or the dishes still in the sink – can all blur together. But contrary to popular belief, it’s not the amount of conflict in your marriage or what you argue about that determines your relationship’s survival rate. to marriage researchers, how a couple fights tends to be the best predicator of whether they’ll end up enjoying their golden years together or battling it out in divorce court. So learning to fight less may not be quite as important as learning to fight fair.

    Four Deadly Sins of Marriage

    Dr. John Gottman of University of Washington, one of the foremost marriage researchers, claims he can predict with 90 percent accuracy if a couple will divorce. In his storied “love lab,” Gottman studies how couples interact, particularly how they communicate with each other in heated moments. After 30 years of research, he has pinpointed four behaviors that seem to invariably spell disaster in any marriage. He ominously refers to them as “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.” Every couple needs to be vigilant and ensure none of the four gallop into their marriage and wreak irreversible havoc.

    Horseman #1: Criticism

    The most common horseman that emerges in long-term relationships is criticism. Frustrations, annoyances and resentment inevitably build up when couples live together – day in and day out. And criticism can be how these emotions manifest in the heat of an argument.

    Note that criticism differs from complaining. Criticism focuses on the person. Complaining focuses on the behavior. This may seem like subtle nuance but research shows it is a distinction that makes a significant difference in the long term. For example, this is a critical statement: “You always drive around in circles. You are an awful driver with a terrible sense of direction.” These words are dripping with blame and accusation. They are a personal attack.

    Unlike criticism, complaining has more to do with how the other person’s behavior makes you feel. Complaining usually begins with an “I” instead of “you”: “I get so frustrated when you are driving and don’t know where you are going.” See the difference? The second statement is a negative comment about something you wish were otherwise. So though “I” statements can seem awkward, they really help keep the carnage manageable during explosive moments.

    Horseman #2: Contempt

    You’re an idiot. You can’t do anything right. You make me sick. These contemptuous words have no place in any relationship you value. They are meant to explicitly humiliate or wound. They are toxic and indefensible. Period.

    Contempt includes but is not limited to name-calling, hostility and sarcasm. Keep in mind that contempt can also be conveyed non-verbally. An excessively harsh tone or disgusted eye roll can escalate your garden-variety argument into WWIII in the blink of an eye. Avoid contempt in your arguments at all cost. It is the basest, most childish tactic to resort to in a fight. Strive to respect your wife even when you disagree or feel upset with her. Contempt is like a poison. It will single-handedly erode intimacy. It destroys a sense of security and mutual respect. It does real damage because it makes a partner feel belittled and unloved.

    Horseman #3: Defensiveness

    Criticism+Contempt=Defensiveness. Defensive statements become practically an involuntary reflex in homes where contempt and criticism are regular visitors. It is understandable. After all, who wouldn’t put up their guard in response to an accusatory, belittling spouse? Defensiveness is fundamentally a self-preserving tactic.

    As understandable as this response can be, it is still hugely destructive. It builds walls. Rather than allow room for connectedness, the foundation for conflict resolution, it tends to breed emotional distance. Defensiveness blocks healing and forgiveness.

    Horseman #4: Stonewalling

    Because stonewalling is not explicitly aggressive, couples often underestimate its destructive potential. But it can be just as devastating to a relationship in its passiveness. It is, in effect, giving up. It is withdrawing emotionally. It is essentially closing the door to a resolution.

    Stonewallers withdraw partly because they can feel overwhelmed with emotion. They may keep their faces expressionless, avoid eye contact, hold their posture rigid, avoid any signs of listening such as nodding or encouraging sounds. They radiate icy distance and disapproval to their partners.

    The Secret to Fighting Fair

    Now that you know the four horsemen, make a conscious effort to keep them in the stable before they trample your marriage. One of the best ways to do this is to make “repair attempts” during your next argument. According to Gottman, repair attempts are any words or actions that prevent a conflict from escalating out of control. As simple as it sounds, repair attempts keep a marriage from becoming negative, hostile and distant.

    Repair attempts can be as basic as changing the topic, giving a compliment, apologizing or saying, “I’ve been cranky all day, can we start over?” It can be as simple as saying, “Don’t worry, we’ll get through this” or cracking a joke to diffuse tension. Research even shows couples who touch during arguments also tend to show higher relationship satisfaction. Do whatever works for you when conflict rears its ugly head.

    Remember, the more entrenched the negative patterns of behavior in your marriage become, the more difficult it becomes to break them. Don’t become a victim of these negative cycles. When two mature people can take ownership and be flexible, they will keep their marriage strong even though they may not always agree. As a Scottish proverb says, “Better bend than break.”

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    Source by Grant Langston

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  • Numerology’s Secret Strength – Your Habit Challenge

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    Where do you turn in times of crisis? How do you find the inner strength to face problems which are beyond your normal strength? Numerology can tell you where your hidden strength lies, ready to come forth in the face of problems beyond your normal resources. This hidden strength is known as your Habit Challenge. This ability is also known as the Submerged Characteristic or Habit number. Normally it lays dormant, hidden in everyday life until you truly need it; Then it blossoms becoming a useful tool to be called on.

    Finding your Habit Challenge

    This is one of the simplest calculations in Numerology. You simple count the number of letters in your use name and then reduce the value with fadic addition. Your use name is what your friends call you, or how you introduce yourself. Note that since this can change through out your lifetime, your Habit Challenge will change as well. As an example, actress Angelina Jolie has a Habit Challenge value of (4) as shown below.

    Angelina Jolie (Habit Challenge) = (8 + 5) = (13) = (4)

    Habit Challenge (1) – Originality

    People with this value respond to crisis by turning to their originality. They are best served by looking to themselves to find the answers they need, usually to the complete surprise of those around them.

    Habit Challenge (2) – Collaborator

    People with this value respond to crisis by teaming up with others. They are best served by being a good follower and trusting their partners to direct them in reaching their goal. If a need for diplomacy occurs, they are truly in their element and will bring good results.

    Habit Challenge (3) – Creativity

    People with this value respond to crisis by turning to their imagination. If there is an artistic solution to their problems, then they will solve them. These souls will also find an ability to put aside their fears and not take their problems seriously, letting them work with little pressure.

    Habit Challenge (4) – Analysis

    People with this value respond to crisis by turning to pure logic and their analytical skills. They will be able to turn off their emotions and work towards a practical and orthodox solution to their problems. They will never break down or lose their head until the crisis has passed.

    Habit Challenge (5) – Flexible

    People with this value respond to crisis by being flexible. They will accept change and take risk as necessary to reach their goals. If there is a New or unusual solution to the crisis, they will find it. These people will exhibit great versatility and quick thinking throughout the crisis.

    Habit Challenge (6) – Responsible

    People with this value respond to crisis by showing sympathy for others and taking on responsibility for the problem they face. These souls will work to shield their friends and family from the affects of the crisis and offer to sacrifice themselves to resolve the problem.

    Habit Challenge (7) – Meditation

    People with this value respond to crisis by using meditation or other techniques to seek knowledge from within themselves to resolve their problems. These souls will reject advice which they have not asked for, and instead look to their intuition for ways to solve their problems. They will always act with perfect timing while the crisis last.

    Habit Challenge (8) – Ruthless

    People with this value respond to crisis by being ruthless and efficient in their actions toward solving their problems. These souls are willing to set ambitious goals and work tirelessly until they are met. They will exhibit determination and infinite patience until the crisis has passed.

    Habit Challenge (9) – Idealist

    People with this value respond to crisis by being an idealist. They will be broad minded in their dealings with others, and generous with their time and resources while the crisis last. These souls will react dramatically with great flare towards those who oppose them until their problems are resolved.

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    Source by Keith Abbott

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  • Overcoming Mindset Challenges

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    We all have those days, we drop our heads and get down on ourselves; you might even let out a few expletive words for good measure. Our pickleball play is just not up to our, or the USAPA player rating standard. It’s frustrating. I’ll let you in on a secret I learned long ago from a coach who pushed us to achieve; your state of mind or your mindset, plays an enormous role in your successes and failure.

    Carol Dweck, author of Mindset, identifies 2 types of mind-sets; fixed and growth. The fixed mindset has shaped you from birth, it is what you are and has defined your belief in your potential. An innate conviction fashioned from external influences and internally interpreted. A fixed mindset, sees obstacles when faced with change and challenges and therefore will interpret failure as self-defeating in the lack of abilities. It’s like looking on the other side of the court and thinking that the grass is greener – your opponents seem to have all the right moves and it’s your lack of something that is keeping you from winning.

    On the other hand, the growth mindset is one that is embryonic. Here is where belief in ourselves can help us adapt and grow in the ways we want by developing our talents through hard-work and dedication. Learning to love our development playing pickleball and also developing a resilience to loss is the key.

    Hear Those “Voices”

    Learning to overcome a fixed mindset challenge begins with learning to control your emotions and then you can achieve optimal performance during competition. First, you need to pay attention to those negative voices; you know the one’s – from family members that expressed failure or the one’s from coaches that uttered a lack of talent. There may have even been laughter from classmates or club memberships. A mentor who would snap when you hit a setback. You may have developed a reactive “habit” – automatic response to an emotional stimuli. Pushing those old suppressed buttons will give you a release and an understanding but despite their best intentions, this can also trigger an emotional upheaval, easily sweeping you away. Fortunately there is one way to stop the spiral of uncontrollable emotional reactions – refocusing. Consciously stepping back to draw your focus into your senses and the physical effects they may manifest; elevated heart rate, sweaty palms, nausea, tight or tense muscles, anxiety, and shallow breathing.

    Acknowledge and Accept

    Staying in the present moment, acknowledging that these physical effects are poignant, so you can process the information as if you are a doctor observing a patient. Comprehend your emotional arousal as an imaginary threat, and your intensified state of mental stress or physical excitement is a normal response that can be reduced by controlling your emotions. Slow down. Accept that you can help your brain learn to process new “habits” to effectively stay grounded; stretch and breathe, visualize or focus on energizing cues that epitomize how you want to perform or transfer negative energy to positive energy.

    Choice

    You have a choice; interpret negative challenges or setbacks from a lack of talent fixed mindset or from a positive aptitude growth mindset. When you doubt your talent, change your focus – with time and effort, believe you can learn a particular skill or achieve a goal. If you hit a setback or face criticism, keep learning and persevere.

    When the grass on the “other side” draws my attention, I stop and reframe – finding the courage in myself to think of the “water”, or successes that keeps my grass green. I still find myself under stress, and I still hear the “voice” of my fixed mindset. I have learned to face the criticism; sometimes old responses rear their ugly head and I get angry – hitting the ball without thinking and making unforced errors. Other times I am able to put those voices in their place. I interpret my challenges, and setbacks then regain my emotional control. It’s all very personal.

    Over time, learning to take on the pickleball challenge wholeheartedly, gaining wisdom from setbacks, and acting on the criticisms you face by embracing the growth mindset can make it work for you.

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    Source by Patricia H Kuhnen-Beaver

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  • Christian Healing Ministries That Heal Stress and Addictions

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    Jesus Christ is the focus of Christian healing ministries that are freeing people from the pain associated with unhealthy lifestyles. There is no limit on the healing power of Jesus Christ. If you are seeking: healing addictions, healing sexual abuse and healing stress: Jesus cares about those things that are plaguing you and here are some Biblical steps that you can take. Spiritual healing is available that will reach deep into a person’s soul to bring healing from these common torments that are destroying the peace and joy that is available through Jesus Christ.

    Healing Stress
    Negative emotions are damaging to the body. Modern life is often characterized by a mounting sea of daily pressures and stressful events which are coming at us from every direction. However, the real culprit behind stress and stress related illnesses is not the situations and daily pressures that are bombarding us. The real culprit behind stress is the emotional reactions that we are experiencing on the inside of us. These emotions can generate sickness within our body. Negative emotions release chemical reactions in the body and the brain. These reactions affect organs on every level including the stomach, heart, large muscles, and the cells throughout the entire body. The most dangerous emotions include: un-forgiveness, depression, rage, anger, worry, fear, grief, guilt and frustration.

    What many don’t realize is that these negative emotions are sins which not only cause disease, they also separate us from God. But don’t be discouraged! There is good news in this truth and that good news is that there is a way out from disease and the entrapment of negative attitudes and emotions that may have affected our personality. Jesus died so that we can be free of sin’s penalty and from its power. We can be set free of negative emotions which cause sickness and stress by learning how to carry our negative emotions captive to Christ (2Co 10:5). Healing stress can bring forth physical healings in our bodies from diseases that we may be experiencing. It always carries us closer to Christ.

    Healing sexual abuse
    Sexual abuse is a traumatic experience that causes deep feelings of rejection within the abused person. Sins against us whether they are verbal, physical, or sexual are tremendously painful experiences which can leave us experiencing symptoms in our personalities such as shyness, perfectionism, exhibitionists, and high achievers. Healing sexual abuse is necessary in order to experience the freedom of life without seeking the approval of others. The deep-rooted pain can cause a person to hide their real self from others and even from God. Healing sexual abuse will result in meaningful relationships and purposeful lives which are filled with true intimacy with others and with God.

    Healing Addictions
    Addiction is bondage in our lives. Spiritual/emotional bondage is anything in our lives that controls us or rules us. God-and the peace and freedom He gives us-is to be our master, not sin. Some things that are good can become addictions when moderation is passed such as eating, work, relationships, shopping, prescription drugs and entertainment. Other addictions are based on things that are not good to begin with such as gambling, foul language, illegal drug use, and pornography. True freedom from addiction and healing addictions begins with allowing God to work on your emotional life and honestly admitting deep down inside that you need His help to help you surrender and stay surrendered to His leadership in your life.

    Healing stress, healing addiction, and healing sexual abuse are only possible through the power of the cross. When you receive Jesus Christ as your savior you receive the Spirit of Jesus Christ within you. Becoming a new man is not always immediately visible outwardly, but as you seek God through the truths found in the Bible you will experience freedom in your life as never before. Christ in you is the hope of glory (Col 1:27):
    To them God willed to make known what are the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles: which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.

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    Source by Scott J Thomas

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  • Emotional Resilience in Children

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    Emotional resilience is the ability to cope with stressful life experiences, disappointments, and challenges in an effective and meaningful way that helps to preserve self-esteem, build social aptitude, and prevent frustration, anger, and even depression. Emotional resilience learned early in life assists in recovering from misfortunes and disappointments, thus fostering emotional health.

    Teaching your child to be emotionally resilient will help him / her be in control and build confidence to work through challenging situations effectively. Becoming emotionally resilient in childhood will provide a basic foundation for your child's emotional health in adolescence and adulthood.

    Emotions shape your child's interactions with others and affect his or her behaviors resulting from those interactions. In order to prevent conflict, or deal with conflict effectively when it arises, your child should learn to understand his or her feelings, be able to identify them, and regulate them. It is important to teach children there is a whole gamut of emotions that can be expressed in various ways. However, knowing how to express them in a meaningful way will help your child in solving social conflicts and maintaining relationships. One way of promoting development of emotional competence is to help your child develop vocabulary that expresses feelings. Parents can also assist their children in recognizing various emotions and teaching them that emotions can be changed by their thinking.

    Emotions are driven by behaviors. However, children must learn that emotions should not take control over their actions. It is crucial for children to know that expressing feelings helps in preventing and resolving problems. They need to be taught that bottled-up feelings lead to misunderstandings, anxiety, anger, and depression.

    When your child does not express emotions, he or she is more likely to experience angry outbursts that might come from being sad, embarrassed, or frustrated. Perhaps, your child feels guilty about something he or she did, is afraid, or feels helpless and chooses to express those negative feelings of emotional stress with angry outbursts. This inability to deal with stress in a constructive way most of the time stems from the lack of understanding one's own emotions, emotions of others, and lacking the ability to express feelings effectively.

    Signs of Emotional Fragility

    – Regression of behaviors
    – Withdrawal
    – Excessive clinginess
    – Bedwetting
    – Nightmares
    – Aggression

    One of the most important things a parent can do to foster a child's healthy emotional development is to promote positive family communication. That includes positive reinforcement, which is praising your child for positive behaviors, giving encouragement, and avoidance of negative criticism when expected results are not achieved. Also, providing consistency is extremely important for a child's emotional health, as it aids in avoiding ambiguity and uncertainty. If a child knows what's expected of him or her, they will most likely comply, thus avoiding frustration, anger, and possibly humiliation.

    Younger children might be more open and willing to express their feelings. In adolescence, family communication might become more challenging as the teen tries to suppress their feelings in an attempt to resolve them alone. Parenting teenagers requires patience and the ability to be supportive. Frequently, conversation with your teen at home might be extremely difficult. However, your teen may try to open up while riding with you in a car where there is no eye contact, thus the confrontation seems to be less intimidating. Building a sound foundation of emotional resilience in childhood will help your adolescent achieve emotional health. Should getting through to your child become impossible, or he or she becomes withdrawn and exhibits signs of emotional instability, don't be afraid to seek help. You may start by talking to another family member, a friend, or a counselor.

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    Source by Monika B. Pis, Ph.D.

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  • How to Attract Wealth by Altering Your Invisible Field?

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    Wealth attraction means more than just inviting more money into your life. It means having fulfilling relationships, love, wealth, health, career and success. If you agree that money is not the only yardstick for wealth, and like to know how to attract wealth by altering your invisible field, you are in the right place.

    First, what is this invisible field? It is the aura that surrounds us. Most of us can’t see this glowing field, but certainly we can feel it.

    Think about this: Have you ever experienced someone standing quietly behind you? It might be your boss watching what you were doing, or a friend planning to give you a surprise. For whatever reason, you would have felt their presence unless you were overly engrossed in your task. The reason why you could feel it was because another invisible field impinged into yours. And that invisible field is the aura.

    Our aura is not only invisible, it is also magnetic. What you attract into your life first manifests in your aura, then in reality. Of course, the manifestation in the aura is not in term of events or objects. Instead, it shows in the shade, shape, condition and colors of the aura.

    Simply put, by changing your aura, you can attract abundance. So how to attract wealth by changing the aura? The 5 step formula for manifesting abundance are as follows:

    1) Create a Clear Picture of Your Desire – First is to be clear and concise on what you want. For simplicity, let’s say you want more money. Write down the amount. Start with what you expect to have 3, 6 and 12 months from now. Check your emotions when you put down the value. If you feel uneasy, adjust the amount till you feel manageable.

    Based on the amount you have written, see yourself celebrating and holding more money progressively.

    2) Get the Aura Tool for Wealth – The truth is you can use visualization to change your aura. But it is easier and faster with crystal. Why crystal? How does it work? The vibe of each type of crystal is unique, consistent and pure. Because of this special characteristic, each crystal has an aura of specific shade and color.

    By leveraging on these stones we can alter our aura to attract wealth. But how to attract wealth with crystal?

    Depending on your definition of wealth, first select a suitable crystal. But since we used money as the example earlier, let’s continue with it.

    For money, we will go with citrine. This stone is a renowned money magnet and mood lifter. Get a citrine crystal sphere of 2 inches or more – the bigger, the better.

    3) Preparing your Wealth Tool – You need to cleanse, charge and program it with the wealth images you have created in step 1.

    Soak the citrine in sea salt water overnight. Rinse with distilled or filtered water and sun it for about half hour. Next place the citrine on your left palm and visualize the images you have created earlier. During visualization, stay relaxed, happy and fulfilled.

    4) Wealth Meditation – In step 4 on how to attract wealth, meditate with the citrine. You can adopt the “sitting on char”, half lotus or full lotus posture. Hold your citrine in your left hand and firmly supported with the right below.

    Meditate for 30 minutes for 7 consecutive days. It will be better to do it for 49 days straight. During meditation, again visualize the created images to reinforce the wealth attraction power.

    5) Release the Feeling – At the end of the meditation, let go of the images and feelings. Place the citrine by the side of your bed and carry on your usual daily tasks.

    With the help of citrine, you have infused your aura with the right shade and colors for wealth attraction. Congratulation!

    Having learned how to attract wealth by changing your aura colors, you must be impressed with what crystals can do for you.

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    Source by Glen Lim

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  • Your Thoughts Plus Emotion Create Thought Forms

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    Think of a time you walked into a place and you felt peace surround you. Now think of a time when you felt discord surround you. Both times you experienced what is called thought forms. This is when the energy of your thoughts and feelings “take form.” An energy is created which is so strong it can be felt by others if they are paying attention.

    Creating a Negative Thought Form

    A passing thought, one without feeling, does not create a thought form. You need the power of your feelings to make such a creation. This is why it is crucial to manage your thoughts and emotions. What you hold in your mind surrounded by emotion stays with you. It can be supportive for you or it can hinder you.

    Let’s say you are having a bad day. Things didn’t go well at work. Your lunch ended up in your lap and there was a traffic snarl which prevented you from getting home as scheduled. And, yes, when you walked in an hour late, the dog hadn’t been able to hold it and had pooped in an inconvenient place.

    With each new thing that went wrong, your feelings of distress become stronger and more pronounced. You can almost feel a little black cloud of frustration or depression surround you. The longer this cloud of negative emotion surrounds you, the more difficult it is for you to pull yourself out of the emotional dumps.

    Transforming the Negative to a Positive

    To pull yourself out of the dark hole you find yourself, you need to get rid of the black cloud. How do you do that when one thing after another has gone wrong? It takes an act of will and determination on your part. Here are a few tricks.

    1. Focus on your heart. You will find that your mood lightens when you do this.

    2. Breathe in and out of your heart. This helps you to become even more centered.

    3. See those heavy feelings as a cloud and see them being washed out of your body and into the ground.

    4. Imagine a time of great joy, peace or relaxation. Really feel it and put a color to it.

    5. Allow that color to expand outwards and totally surround you.

    You’ve now changed the reality you created from one of darkness to one of joy.

    If you do this on a regular basis you will find yourself being more disciplined about the thoughts and feelings you have. You will become aware that they are transitory and you can change them to something that will move you forward in life.

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    Source by Cathy Chapman, Ph.D.

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  • Emotional Upsets As We Age – Adult Health and Wellness

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    As we age, it is more likely that we will eventually experience emotional upsets, loss and change. Many of us go from busy, full time workers or full time parents to partial workers, empty nesters and grandparents, to full time retirees, with or without a life partner, adequate financial resources, secure housing, or a network of close family and friends. We may move from a familiar neighborhood to a different retirement community. Friends, neighbors, close relatives and even our beloved house pets may become ill and pass away. Depending upon whether we have developed the positive mental attitudes, uplifting and life affirming spiritual connections, healthy lifestyle, social contacts, and continued passion for living – which researchers describe as the formula for healthy aging – we are more likely to suffer more from illness, disability and emotional instability as we age.

    Complications of Emotional Upsets and Stress

    Stress Accelerates Cellular Aging

    Research is beginning to substantiate the devastating effects of long term stress on health and aging. Telomeres, the DNA-protein structures that cap the ends of chromosomes and promote genetic stability, appear to play important roles in cellular aging and disease. Elisa Epel and colleagues examined the effects of psychological stress on telomere maintenance in 58 healthy premenopausal women. Results, appearing in the December 1, 2004 Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, indicate that the psychologically stressed women had shorter telomeres and less telomerase, a telomere producing enzyme which affects immune function cells in the blood.

    Stressful Jobs Affect Health of the Elderly.

    In workers over age 60, problems on the job raise blood pressure in although these older workers often claim to be less upset and less sad than younger employees when work problems hit. They seem to “feel” less emotion, but their bodies reveal greater stress factors. Older workers may be more vulnerable to heart and cardiovascular problems if they remain in high-pressure jobs or situations.

    Emotional Stress May Precipitate Heart Problems

    Emotional stress can precipitate severe left ventricular heart valve dysfunction in patients who do not apparently have coronary disease. This reversible condition, called myocardial stunning, cardiac stunning or myocardial stress, is brought on by severe emotional stress. Research corroborates the phenomenon that severe emotional stress and heartbreak, such as the break up, loss, or death of a a loved one, can release an onslaught of stress hormones that cause the heart muscle to contract and spasm, possibly leading to severe complications and even loss of life.

    Emotions Affect Blood Cells

    Photos of frozen water crystals imbued with different emotions appeared in the book, The Hidden Messages in Water by Japanese researcher Masaru Emoto. Inspired by these photos, Rebecca Marina attempted to replicate the experiment by having her own blood samples photographed on slides while she caused herself to feel specific emotions.

    She focused first on sadness. In this photograph, her blood cells seemed to actually take on the formation of teardrops and were seen moving rapidly (rather than slowly and sluggishly as we might expect) with a lot of white blood cells predominant, more so than in a normal blood sample.

    When she felt fear, the blood cells moved around rapidly and frantically with an increased number of white blood cells and then stopped moving rather abruptly, as if exhausted.

    Feelings of love produced slower, more placid movement and some sparkly substance in the fluid. Interestingly, when she felt love, the blood cells on the “sadness” slide that had remained on the screen began to change. In other words, even when her blood was no longer inside her body, her feelings of love actually affected the movement, shape and quality of her blood cells on the slide.

    But the most astounding effect was when she focused on Divine Mother or spiritual love and peace. The fluid part of the blood became clear, the movement of the cells was placid, and the cells were just gliding along. The white blood cells that showed had a white glowing center and a pulsation in that center almost like a heartbeat! And some of the cells actually took on a heart shape. (EFT – Emotional Freedom Technique Research)

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    Source by Erica Goodstone, Ph.D.

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