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  • Jeffrey Archer’s "Old Love" Redefines Love Story

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    The “Old Love” of Jeffrey Archer is a unique amorous tale between two brilliant students of English literature from Oxford. Archer makes an exploration of the theme of love from a completely unusual standpoint. The rendition is fiercely honest while he portrays a chronic sense of envy and rivalry between two sworn arch-rivals in the Oxford University: William Hatchard and Philippa Jameson. Initially, their aggressive competition unsettles their tutor Simon Jakes. In their constant intellectual debates, Philippa confronted the deep, confident voice of William with her high-heeled boldness. The mutual hatred was absolute. Their sharply perceptive and analytical mind refused to be submissive to each other. Indeed, this fierce sense of competition enabled them to outshine everyone else in the field. Given the background of 1930’s she, to him, was “that silly woman” and he “that arrogant man”. Yet strange is the way of destiny that an unusual love story should blossom between the bitterest of academic rivals!

    This rivalry assumed an unpalatable intensity when both excelled as toppers in their final degree exam. The Charles Oldham Shakespeare’s essay writing competition fed fat to this fire of passionate jealousy and became a life and death question for each to defeat the other.There were liberal exchanges of scornful remarks between the two to play each other down. However, things took a dramatic turn when William unwittingly discovered about the death of Philippa’s father (who was a Vicar) from cancer, and also, his secret dream to let his daughter study in Oxford and win the Charles Oldham award. The sight of silent sobbing of his proud and powerful adversary stirred up a sudden feelings of empathy in his guts. He got over his tentative doubts and offered to accompany her to her village for the burial ceremony. They held hand for the first time and discovered the new bond of friendship as they started their journey to her village. They communicated with each other spontaneously while returning to Oxford which bounces Philippa back to her normal competitive spirit. She slowly discovers the growth of her new found intense attraction for William. The latter secretly enjoys this interesting conversion in the Vicar’s daughter.

    The transformation of hatred into love has always been a captivating subject in itself, and Archer makes the situation entertaining with the employment of sparkling wit in their conversation. They make a visit to Stratford and have meals together. But their first date was far from usual: it is a unique blend of warmth and intellectual antagonism! If this instinctive antagonism triggered a strong sense of hatred before, now it drew them closer. In fact, this killer instinct became a delirious source of entertainment for both. Archer makes the reader question if intense hatred could indeed be an expression of hidden attraction?

    Anyway, the situation takes a quirky turn while returning from Stratford. On their way back to Oxford, Phillipa and William had to spend the night in a car as the petrol gauge showed empty. The former obviously did not miss the chance of expressing her doubt about the cerebral power of a person who couldn’t even read a petrol gauge! The day next William gave her the reason why he let the car run out of petrol: He said with a rare sense of humor: “My father told me if I spent the night with a barmaid then I should simply order an extra pint of beer, but if I spent the night with the vicar’s daughter, I would have to marry her.” He came down on his knees and said,” Will you marry me if I win the Charles Oldham?” Philippa answered that “as there is absolutely no fear of that happening I can safely say, yes… ” When William declared his love for her she told him not to show his face in Somerville again if he failed to win Charles Oldham. The readers wonder if the writer reveals Philippa’s secret wish that she could marry himeven at the cost of losing Charles Oldham! Otherwise why would tears come to Philippa’s eyes when a girl informed her that she had won? It was a moment of crisis for her because between the conflicting emotion of ambition and love in her heart, the latter had won and for once the proud girl confessed, “I do love nothing in the world so well as you; is that not strange?”

    However, when she discovered that William was a joint winner, her puckish spirit returned as she said ” I take thee for pity” to which William replied ” I yield upon great persuasion… ” They were locked in a passionate embrace, and after that, they were never apart for more than a few hours. Strangely, their honeymoon in Athens ended up in a heated argument over the relative significance of Doric and Ionic architecture!

    Later in life, this constant battle of wit prevented their romance from dwindling into boredom and banality. Their serious research works and creative activities, though on different fields, kept them deeply connected. After three years, “with well-received D. Phils”, they moved on, in tandem, to college teaching. But their fierce encounters continued and their sharp wit at each other’s expense would flash across the dinner tables at Oxford. However, those who understood their love felt envious of their unique relationship! They were childless yet their life was not tasteless.

    Returning home after the celebration dinner (being declared the Joint Professor), their heated argument over Proust’s monumental work took such an intimidating turn, that a policeman, nearby, asked Philippa “Is everything all right madam?” “No, it is not”, William declared “this woman has been attacking me for over 30 years, and to date the police have done deplorably little to protect me”. Yet, beneath this apparent antagonism, their bond continued to grow stronger with each passing year. Interestingly, their intense love was inseparable from their zealous intellectual antagonism which lent a peculiar aura to their relationship. When Philippa was made the Dame of the British Empire, William referred to her as an “Old Dame” he had to live with now. It is this bitter-sweet flavor of their love which defines their marriage.

    The most irritable habit of Philippa to William was her determination each morning to complete “The Times” crossword before he arrived at the breakfast table. One fine morning in June, William, studying the clue, filled in the eight boxes left incomplete by Philippa. Philippa’s instantly retorted that there was no such word. To the delight of Philippa the word “Whym Wham” could not be found in the shorter Oxford Dictionary. William assured her that the word could be found in OED on his desk, made for scholars like him. William left the breakfast table with sharp comments on Philippa’s limited command of English language and that she will have to eat a humble pie at Somerville’s Gaudy Feast as she reads the collected works of John Skelton…

    William left with a sigh, kissing his wife on her cheek, wishing he had lost Charles Oldham. Philippa replied that he did indeed because it was highly inappropriate during those days to declare a woman as the sole winner! Having closed the front door, as she entered the kitchen, Dame Philippa suddenly suffered her lone heart attack. She called out to William hoarsely but in vain. The news of her death was conveyed and the story ends with a note of dark humor in the suicidal note of Sir William (who shot himself with his pistol): “Forgive me, but I had to let her know”. There was the volume of the work of John Skelton held open in one of his hand with the word “Whym Wham” underlined neatly, his fingers stiff and cold around it. Such weird ending, subtly hints at the essence of special relationship this couple shared so that they rise above the great marriage vow “TILL DEATH DO US PART.” Archer’s love story excels because death could not part Sir William and Dame Philippa! Even while following his wife to her grave, William felt the need to camouflage the inseparable bond they shared, and the insufferable loneliness he would feel without her… he does it with a wry sense of humor!

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    Source by Mandira Mazumder

    Views: 0

  • Divorce Tips: How To Heal From A Divorce In One Therapy Session

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    Healing from a divorce does take time and people going through this process are apt to experience a range of emotions including sadness, guilt, anger, resentment, anxiety, frustration and depression.

    The good news is that therapy can expedite the healing process and help people to view the end of their marriage in a more positive manner.

    Some years ago, I developed a visualization technique based on Ericksonian Psychotherapy and Hypnosis and which seems to help many divorcing individuals to heal from their loss and to restore their overall well-being.

    A description of this technique appears below.

    Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths as you listen to my voice.

    Each time you breath in through your nose and out through your mouth. And every time you inhale you take in relaxation, peace and healing. And each time you exhale you let go of or diminish any pain, sadness or any negative or uncomfortable thought or unpleasant emotion.

    So, your breath becomes a powerful healing tool. You can use your breath to adjust your mood whenever you need to do so.

    And as you use your breathing to heal yourself, you may also discover that your mind can go back in time if you want it to do so.

    And as you go back in time…

    Do you remember when you were a little boy or a little girl?

    You may remember what you looked like back then or you may have seen photos videos of yourself from your childhood.

    You may also recall what the house you grew up in looked like.

    Now, when you were a child, you probably fell down while running or while riding your bicycle. And most likely, you bruised your knee or your elbow. And your arm or your leg probably bled what felt like a lot back then.

    Then your mom, dad or a neighbor came along and gave you a hug and comforted you.

    They washed out the wound and applied an antiseptic to the injury. This probably that stung a bit. When it was placed on your wound, you may have felt like you were going to have to feel a little worse before you could feel a little better.

    And then your caretaker applied a band aid or some gauze and tape that was just the right size to cover and protect your wound.

    This helped you to feel less pain, a bit safer and a bit more secure.

    The wound may have felt worse for the next day and for even a few more days or weeks.

    You probably had to change the band aid every day or so. And you may have to wash the injured spot frequently.

    But in time, the wound began to heal, even though you may have scratched it at times, like most kids do.

    And after the passage of a little some more time, a scab formed, all the bleeding stopped and the old skin was replaced with news softer but tougher new skin.

    After a little more time, the pain subsided almost completely. Though, you still had some good days and bad days with your wound.

    Now, the pain from some wounds may not ever go away one hundred per cent.

    Many of us have physical aches and pains that stay with us, but we push on in spite of them.

    But, luckily, sometimes healing eighty or ninety percent is sufficient for us to carry on to feel generally okay.

    As you can see, the mind heals from emotional losses and wounds in much the same way that it heals from physical injuries.

    So, if you or someone you love is struggling with a loss, think about the process of healing described in the metaphor.

    Perhaps it will to help to lessen your pain, allow you to heal and to move forward with your life with a more positive spirit.

    Give it a try. Interestingly, this same technique has been used by people who are dealing with the death of a loved one.

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    Source by Jay P. Granat, Ph.D.

    Views: 0

  • My Husband Says That I Am Too High Maintenance

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    Any complaint that causes your husband to disconnect from your marriage, to distance himself from you, or to consider a separation hurts. There is no scenario where this isn’t painful. But I suspect that it can feel a little more painful when the reason for his distance seems personal.

    What I mean by that is that sometimes, a man will be unhappy because of reasons that have to do with him. He may be having a midlife crisis. He may believe that marriage doesn’t suit his ideology. He may be having a personal crisis. I am not saying that these scenarios are not horribly painful. They are. But at least the wife has no reason to blame herself.

    And then there are the scenarios where things do feel personal. These are the instances where your husband is blaming the issues in the marriage on the wife. It could be something that she has done or something about her, about her actions, or about her personality that is the supposed problem.

    Here’s an example. A husband might tell his wife that being with her is “exhausting.” She might explain: “for the past three months or so, I have been noticing my husband acting distant and weird. I confronted him about it right away, but he denied that there was a problem. Then we were at a family gathering this weekend and it was held outside in 90 degree heat. Like everyone else, I said it was hot and wanted to leave after dinner because I felt sick. My husband got angry at me and said he was tired of dealing with my ‘high maintenance personality.’ As we were leaving, he said that being married to me is ‘exhausting’ and that he may want a separation because he can not stand living his life this way anymore. He says that nothing makes me happy and that I can’t just sit back and roll with the punches of life like a normal person. He says that I am spoiled. He says that he feels like he always has to pick up the slack. I admit that I am not as thick skinned as some when it comes to sitting in the heat all day, but that doesn’t make me a bad person. And he knew that when he married me. I told him that I could try to change and he said that people like me never change and that we are just not compatible. He says that I make him ‘feel tired’ and he doesn’t want to feel that way anymore. Where does that leave me? I don’t want to lose my husband. This really hurts my feelings and feels like a personal attack. But I could forgive it and move on if he would give me the chance. The problem is that he does not seem at all receptive to me right now.”

    I understand why you are hurt. These types of issues can feel, and sound, like a criticism. When someone tells you that you are ‘exhausting,’ that phrase makes it seem as if they no longer want to do the work to keep up with you. Of course it hurts.

    Understand The Context In Which The Comments Were Made: I think that your husband’s ‘fatigue’ might be due to the fact that the maintenance issue may have bothered him for a while, but he sat silent and said nothing – even when you asked him what was bothering him. So things built up until they exploded. His silence is not your fault. And things may have been easier now if he had addressed the problem much earlier – before he became so angry that he lashed out at you.

    Know That Context Doesn’t Mean That It Isn’t Time To Take Action: It’s normal to hope that this will blow over. And it may – for now. But any time a husband is uttering words that indicate he is tired of your marriage or thinks that there is a compatibility issue, you want to pay very close attention and you want to take action right away. I say this not to scare you, but from the concerned place of someone who was in a similar situation. I hoped for the problem to pass over, but I ultimately ending up separated. I think that I possibly could have avoided that fate by taking action at the first sign of trouble.

    Moving Forward Quickly: It’s unfortunate that your husband waited so long to share that this issue has been bothering him, but you can’t undo that at this point. What you can do, however, is be careful of what (and who) you are presenting to him moving forward. It doesn’t sound as if he has made definite plans to move out or to pursue a separation, which means that you may have some time to address this.

    Sit back and be really honest with yourself. Which of his concerns have some validity? What is he right about? Is this issue something that other friends and family members have expressed? If so, then there is nothing wrong with addressing it. Sometimes, it takes a painful situation to stimulate growth. If you take this and use it to move you forward so that you grow and improve in some way, then at least the pain will have been for something. At least you can use this as a stimulus to improve your marriage.

    If you are very honest and you find that his words do not have validity, then you may went to dig a little deeper. Sometimes, a husband will project another problem onto to what is obvious or handy. It may not have been the heat or your personality at all during that family gathering. But the situation might have given your husband an easy explanation. Sometimes, a husband can be frustrated and not quite sure why. That’s one more reason why it’s very important to be extremely observant right now – so that you are taking action on the items that are truly at issue.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

    Views: 0

  • My Wife Has No Time for Me! How to Take Control and Change This

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    We’re all well aware that each day only affords us a meagre twenty-four hours. When you factor in the time you spend working, traveling to and back to the office, sleeping, showering and eating, there isn’t a whole lot of time left for anything else. However, when you’re married you really do need to pencil in some time to spend with your spouse. It’s expected and beyond that, it’s crucial for a well balanced, happy and fulfilling partnership. That’s why it’s so alarming if you’re a man who has a wife with a schedule that doesn’t leave any time at all for you. If your wife is so busy that she can’t spend even a few moments with you per day, you need to help her find an opening here and there to connect with you. If you want your marriage to last, this needs to be at the top of your priority list.

    Obviously, you are going to take it personally if your wife has no time for you. Early in your marriage, she made certain that she had time to devote just to you, yes? You two did things together that you likely miss now. Perhaps back then you took something like having a coffee together for granted. Now you’d give just about anything to have an hour alone with her. As much as you may want to blame her lack of interaction with you on her busy schedule, there’s probably an underlying reason why she has excuse after excuse for not spending time with you. In most cases where this happens, it’s because the wife has begun to feel emotionally detached from her husband. Instead of trying to make awkward small talk with him she’d rather avoid him.

    Your wife isn’t about to do anything on her own to change this. If she seems happy enough filling her days with things that keep her from you, it’s you who needs to alter the routine of your marriage. Start by telling your wife that you miss her and wish you two had more time together. Although this may not alter her schedule so that she makes time for you, it lets it be known that you’re not happy with the way things are and your goal is to share more of your life with her. Your statement about wanting to be with her more won’t go unnoticed by her even if she seems to ignore it or brush it aside.

    Many women are devoting a great deal of their time to things that have to do with running the household and being a mom. You’re part of that equation so why not pitch in so your wife has more time for you? You can ask her if there’s anything she’d like you to do but be prepared for her to say there isn’t. Many women have a bit of a control streak running through them and they like to tackle everything they possibly can just because they believe no one else has the ability to do it quite as well as they do. If this sounds like a dictionary description of your wife’s personality, take on some tasks on your own. Jump in and drive the kids to school or make dinner a few times a week. Show your wife that you want to be her domestic partner as well as her life partner. The time you spend doing things around the house or tending to the children will result in more free time for your wife and thus more time for her to be with you.

    A great way to solve the issue of a wife who has no time is to create a scenario in which she has no choice but to spend time with you. This almost sounds like it borders on forcing her to make time for you but don’t view it that way. Plan an evening out for the two of you and take care of all the details right down to arranging child care if necessary. Then surprise your wife with your thoughtful night out. She’ll see the effort you put in as a sign of your desire to be closer to her. It’s a great way to not only have some uninterrupted time with your wife but it will give you a chance to talk with her about what she’s feeling and that will only help when it comes to bridging any emotional distance she may be feeling.

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    Source by Gillian Reynolds

    Views: 0

  • How To Rescue Love And Heal A Relationship Or Fix A Broken Marriage

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    Many couples experience rainy weather in their relationship at one point or another in their lives.

    This is very natural since there are a lot of aspects that can develop common relationship problems and disputes in between couples and sometimes, nobody wants to pave the way.

    This is where most of the relationship issues begin, when both partners do not recognize their faults and imperfections, and both are attempting to point out that they are best and it is always the other who is incorrect.

    Disputes should never be reason enough to end a relationship. There are still easy ways to heal a relationship and effective rekindling the old love.

    Interact with your Partner

    Interaction is among the most effective keys to complete a relationship rescue strategy.

    Because increasingly more couples these days breakup without even acknowledging the real reason things go wrong, this must considered on the to-do list of how to fix the broken marriage.

    That’s why family counseling can open newer doors for seeing the light in repairing the relationship issues.

    The Course in Miracles asks us to contemplate, “How much do you want salvation.”

    Partners need to talk things over and voice out their sides and open up their grudges prior to being far too late when things are getting rather out of hand.

    Through interaction, both will have a clear image of exactly what is going on, why the conflict is happening, and exactly what relationship rescue approaches can be done to exceed this duration.

    When to Keep Quiet

    Silence could not be the best solution for a reliable relationship rescue, but it does contribute a lot so a relationship struggle doesn’t worsen.

    Frequently, when couples are having conflicts, they have the tendency to talk excessively and say things that can be hurtful, thus they disregard one of the most important parts of a relationship which is listening.

    When to keep quiet and peaceful throughout a heated argument is something couples need to learn, because it’s always best not to raise voices, yell at each other, and worse, resort to physical violence to silence the other.

    When both are angry, they must let their heavy emotions subside first before speaking because typically, a mad person speaks even without sense and never takes any reason.

    Spend some Time Alone at Times

    Previously I discussed and reviewed the many tidbits and free advice available online for saving the marriage or a love relationship when both parties are willing and ready to heal.

    If communication and keeping silence did not work as part of the relationship rescue plan, having time to be alone could be a good thing to do for the meantime.

    Conflicts have two impacts: one is to reinforce the relationship and two is to break the relationship.

    If these disputes repeat in circles every day, the tendency is that both partners will be fed up, and thus the very first thing that concerns their mind as a solution is to end the relationship.

    If both have some space for a while and try to reassess their sensations and recognize where their errors are, this can be avoided.

    Give some Space

    When he or she is not around, this can be a reliable common relationship problems solution due to the fact that in some cases individuals realize the importance of their partner.

    These are some of the effective ways that couples can do in order to achieve an effective relationship rescue and rekindling the old love.

    Both partners need to recognize that ending the relationship is not always a good path to take just to end a dispute, however rather follow these relationship rescue techniques to resolve them.

    With all these things in mind, no matter what common relationship problems can be found in the relationship, both partners can get through these and make their relationship even stronger.

    Finding Strength

    Try to remember that unsettled arguments and disputes have a few effects, and one is to strengthen the relationship and open each other’s eyes, and another is to end the relationship.

    These are some of the efficient lessons that can be learned in family counseling, and what to address so that you may save your relationship.

    Both partners need to realize that leaving the relationship is many times not the best solution to end a conflict, however instead follow these marriage tips to solve them.

    With all these things in mind, no matter what common relationship problems creep in, both partners can get through these and make rekindling the old love even more powerful.

    Try to look at the strong components for healing a love problem so that a wonderful relationship is lived.

    (I suggest searching the net for further helpful and healing material on trying to save your relationship and addressing the issues that could potentially reach the end of the line and become too hard and disastrous to handle.)

    To saving your relationship!

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    Source by James Nussbaumer

    Views: 0

  • MLM Training – How To Answer the 30 Most Common Questions And Rejections In MLM or Network Marketing

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    Ok, so you’ve made the call, initiated the invitation, but things didn’t go as smoothly as what you expected.

    Your prospect started to ask some tough questions.

    Gulp, all of a sudden your tongue got tied up! You panic and said something stupid.

    Just yesterday, one of my downlines asked me after she made her first few calls to some prospects.

    What do you say when they ask you, Is this MLM? or Do I need to sell stuff? or Do I need to spend a lot of time?

    Here are your answers to the 30 most asked questions in MLM or Network Marketing.

    1. What is this business all about?

    Answer 1 (refer back to your website): Well, everything is explained on my website. Can you check it out today?

    Answer 2 (if your company does not provide a website): Well, I can’t explain it over the phone, so the best way is to meet up either today or tomorrow so that I can show you the details.

    * Now, the reason why we do not want to explain over the phone, is simply because there is no way the prospect can see the full big picture with some words transferred over the phone! Remember, our responsibility in MLM is to pass the message on and the clearer the message, the lower the chance of rejection or misinformation.

    2. Is this MLM?

    Answer: (Answer a question with a question) Why do you ask that? Have you done MLM before?

    * In this case, we answer a question with a question because we want to know if the prospect is NEGATIVE towards MLM. If the prospects answers your question with a negative response eg. Yes I have and I failed terribly or No I have not, but my relative/friend was involved with some MLM and failed, then you must be more tactful and answer Well, its not what you think or have seen. Check out my website or I can show you the details when we meet up today or tomorrow.

    3. Is this one of those pyramids or money games?

    Answer: No, of course not. Why do you say that? Did you have a bad experience with something like that?

    *Again, we want to find out if the prospect had a negative experience and we want to reassure them that our business is nothing like that.

    4. So do I need to sell anything?

    Answer: No, this business is not about being a super salesperson if you do not like sales.

    *The reason why we say this is because more than 90% of the worlds population does not like sales. However, its more of a fear of having to sell stuff because they do not see the benefits or whats in it for them.

    5. Do I have to sell stuff to my family and friends?

    Answer: No, you do not have to if you do not like doing that.

    * Most people fear peddling products to their family and friends, however most of the time, their opinion will change when they realize how good the products are and how they can benefit from those products.

    6. Do I have to make cold calls?

    Answer: No, you do not need to make cold calls if you do not want to.

    7. Do I have to spend long hours to do this business?

    Answer: Well, its actually flexible and totally up to you. The more time and effort you put into the business, the more you will earn as there is no limit to the amount of money you can make.

    8. I don’t have many friends.

    Answer: Its ok. You do not need to depend on your friends and relatives to succeed in this business.

    9. So what do I need to do?

    Answer: You need to go through our company training and learn the basics of the business, then follow our step by step system to guide you towards success.

    10. Do I need to invest a lot of money?

    Answer: That’s the beauty of this business. You do not need to invest a huge sum of money to start the business. How much will you need to start a McDonald’s or Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise?

    *The idea here to make a powerful reference to a business like McDonald’s which everyone knows or has heard about. Then, inform the prospect that a McDonald’s franchise takes something like US$1 million dollars to start. However, our business just needs a few hundred or thousand dollars to get started. Comparatively, that’s not a huge investment at all!

    11. I can’t talk as well as you.

    Answer: In this business, its not about being able to talk well. Besides, well be guiding you with our step by step system that does not require you to talk well or be a good salesman.

    12. I am just too busy.

    Answer: Will you like to have more time freedom then?

    *Explain to the prospect the ideas I shared in WHY MLM about exchanging your time for money and exchanging OPT(Other peoples time) for your wealth. Many people think they are doing well, but they don’t realize they are still caught in the rat race.

    13. I don’t think MLM or Network Marketing is a professional career.

    Answer: Have you heard of Donald Trump(ultra rich billionaire property mogul in the hit show THE APPRENTICE) or Robert Kiyosaki (World famous author of the book RICH DAD POOR DAD)? If both of them strongly recommend network marketing or MLM as one of the best businesses for people to get rich with, do you think that they will risk their reputation on something that is not professional?

    *The best way is to show them Donald Trump and Robert Kiyosaki’s book which they co-wrote together, Why We Want You To Be Rich? and flip to that one entire chapter where both of them recommend that we join network marketing in order to get rich!

    14. Have you made any money yet?

    Answer(if you just started): No, I just started the business and any business takes time to generate income. However, I can introduce to my upline who has made money already and is very successful. You can check out his website or I can arrange a 3 way call for a conversation with him.

    15. How long will it take for me to make any money?

    Answer: Its up to how much time and effort you put into the business. However, give yourself at least 3 months to learn the ropes first.

    16. What if I run out of friends?

    Answer: As I mentioned, you do not need to limit yourself to your friends and family. We will guide you step by step how you can have an unlimited number of people to share the business with.

    17. I don’t think I can afford the money to start.

    Answer: Do you really seriously want to achieve your dreams? If yes, figure out a way you can get the money to start. You can start saving up now so that you can start later.

    18. You are already successful, that’s why you can do it but I am not like you.

    Answer: Do you want to change your life then? If yes, start by being a good student and learn how to do it. We are willing to guide you towards success.

    19. Do I have to become a products expert?

    Answer: No, we are only the messengers who pass the information on to others. We do not need to become doctors, or nutritionists or product experts.

    20. Can I build my business overseas to other countries?

    Answer: Yes, of course. With the internet, we are able to share our business opportunity with anyone in any country around the world. So long we are able to deliver the products there, anything is possible.

    21. Can I start part time and still succeed?

    Answer: Yes, of course. Many of us start part time and build up a significant income before we go full time.

    22. How long will it take to achieve a full time income?

    Answer: Just like any business, give yourself at least 6 months to 1 year to build up a significant income.

    23. Can I register a company to do this type of business?

    Answer: Yes of course. You are already considered a self employed business owner by starting this business, so you can register a sole proprietorship, partnership or incorporated company to do this business and enjoy all the tax benefits.

    24. Can I do this business together with my spouse?

    Answer: Yes of course. In fact, we have seen many success stories of couples who work together as partners in this business and it not only helps with their finances, but their marriage as well.

    25. The money in network marketing is too slow for me.

    Answer: Well, if you’re looking for fast money, usually its associated with high risk. However, if you want low risk, but highly leveraged passive residual income i.e. income that grows while you sleep without risking high investments, network marketing will give you that if you work the business for 1 to 2 years.

    26. Too many people fail in MLM.

    Answer: Isn’t that true in any industry? Example, insurance, property agents, even 9 of 10 traditional businesses fail in any given year. Be it in MLM or in any industry, the only people who fail are those who give up. And those who succeed are those who never ever GIVE UP.

    27. I hear too many horror stories and negative comments about MLM.

    Answer: There is nothing wrong about MLM as a business model. Its just misunderstood by the general public. However, did you know that when franchising first started in USA, everyone said it’s a scam? The same thing happened when personal insurance policies were first introduced to the general public. It took more than 20 years before the public started to accept that personal insurance wasn’t a scam to cheat your money but a necessary protection instead. But if you had been one of those pioneering leaders in the Insurance industry, today you will be very rich! So its the same situation for MLM, when less people understand it, that’s when the opportunity is BIG.

    28. Do I need to convince people to buy products?

    Answer: No. Your responsibility is to pass the information to them so that they can review the DVD, website or magazine so that they can convince themselves if they are interested. You do not need to do any convincing at all.

    29. I have no extra time to do this.

    Answer: If today I told you that I’m selling my ferrari sports car for $1000 and you only have until tomorrow to grab this limited time offer, will you find the time to get $100 to me right now? If yes, it means that the point is whether you really want it bad enough to find time to do it. So do you really want to succeed or are you just fooling around?

    30. I have no idea where or how to start.

    Answer: No problem, let me guide you step by step with our new distributor orientation training system and quick start checklist.

    * By this time, your company or your organizations training system should have a simple step by step checklist or training guide that you can use to duplicate your new downline to get started.

    So there you have it!

    The 30 most common questions, answers and rejections in MLM or Network Marketing.

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    Source by Dennis Bay

    Views: 0

  • I’m Angry That He Won’t Marry Me And This Is Hurting Our Relationship: Tips That Might Help

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    I sometimes hear from women who, after a set amount of time, begin to feel a little annoyance, frustration, anger, or resentment that they are not getting engaged or married. And, as time goes by these negative feelings build so that it begins to hurt the relationship. The great irony of all of this is that this whole process can actually make a marriage or engagement less likely so that it is a vicious cycle.

    I heard from a woman who said: “I’ve been with my boyfriend for five years. I hate calling him that, my boyfriend. We’re in our late twenties and that’s too old to be calling someone your boyfriend. At this point, we have lived together for two and a half years. He knows that I want to get married, but he’s dragging his feet. We own our apartment together, but other than this, there’s nothing legally binding us together. I worry that if something happened to either of us, the other wouldn’t have any legal standing to make decisions. I’m angry that he has put me in this position. I feel like he thinks that I’m good enough to live with but not good enough to marry. And I find myself short tempered and sarcastic with him because of my anger. At this rate, I feel like this whole process is going to hurt our relationship. I can’t seem to control my feelings. And I feel that I have a right to be angry. What can I do?” I will try to address these concerns in the following article.

    Understand That If Left Unchecked, This Cycle Really Can Harm Or Even Destroy Your Relationship: Many couples get caught in this cycle and they just sort of become so used to it that they start to envision that it is always going to be this way. They figure that no one is going to blink first so that they will sort of always be at a stand still, waiting to see who is going to make the first move. That’s why they often don’t even see the end of their relationship coming. This cycle has ended many relationships precisely because people begin to believe that nothing is ever going to change. And eventually, one or both of the parties decides that they just don’t want to live this way anymore.

    Consider Agreeing To Shelf The Issue And Then To Come Back To It At An Agreed Upon Time: Here’s what you have to understand. It’s possible that eventually, this issue will become a central problem in your relationship. And, when this happens, the whole dynamics of your relationship changes and this change is not for the better. It seems as if everything always come back to this one thing and you can’t seem to regain your footing or to move forward.

    It’s my experience and observation that it is better for you to put this issue on the shelf, for just a little while, if you find that it is deteriorating your relationship. Sometimes, when I explain this to folks, they think that I am telling them to give up or to just accept that he doesn’t want to marry you. This isn’t what I am implying at all. I am only saying that if you agree to shelf it and then to reevaluate, you gain a couple of things. First, you limit the damage to your relationship. In order for him to commit to you, he needs to have the peace of mind that the relationship is worthy of that commitment. The chances of this happening are less if you just can’t move past your differences of opinion on this topic.

    Second, if you can get him to agree to revisit this topic later, then he’s committed to thinking very seriously about committing at a later point in time. As far as I’m concerned, that is a huge gain and big bonus. Because as of right now, you don’t have that. And when you shelf the issue, you place your focus back on your relationship. The tension wanes and things can be good between you again. This way, when you two do discuss this again at that set time, your relationship will hopefully have recovered to the point where he is comfortable committing. If he is not, then it may be time to dig a little deeper to determine why he isn’t comfortable committing.

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    Source by Mari Deene

    Views: 0

  • A Christian Love That Goes Beyond Words in Marriage

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    If there is anything that stands at the center of Christianity, it is a deep love expressed to humanity by God himself, which is in turn expressed to others by each of us who have chosen to receive that love. And yet, when it comes to many Christian marriages, this necessary expression of love is often replaced by emotional distancing and painful conflict, which leads many of us to ask, “Where’s the breakdown?”

    CRACKS IN THE MARRIAGE FOUNDATION

    The more I work with Christian couples it becomes apparent that this breakdown is tied to cracks in their marital and spiritual foundations. On the marital front, encouragement is replaced by criticism, validation is replaced by defensiveness, and listening is replaced by the need to express one’s own frustrations. Spiritually, it is often the case that these couples have neglected a pursuit of God in their daily lives, and have defaulted to simply doing things their own way relationally. Yet, they also recognize how relevant that pursuit is to them being able to love one another in the manner they desire.

    A MARITAL DEFINITION OF LOVE

    It is hard to overstate how important love is to a married couple having a strong foundation that lasts a lifetime and facilitates an unbreakable sense of intimacy and connection. Yet, how is the type of love we’re discussing defined? Here’s a definition I will often apply when counseling married couples:

    Love is choosing to be other-centered for the benefit of your spouse, so that what is important to them becomes important to you. It is unselfish and without pride, and aims to offer them the forgiveness and grace which you did not deserve, but were given anyway by God in spite of your sin.

    I realize you may be familiar with other definitions of love, however I believe this definition helps bring married couples to the point of being able to see that their Christian faith is more than a simple tradition. It is a lifestyle of discipleship in which commands such as “love your neighbor as yourself” become formative principles calling each of us to rely on the Lord to empower and guide us as we seek to cherish our significant other.

    RECLAIMING OUR PURSUIT OF THE LORD

    I’m absolutely confident that couples who pursue the Lord in their daily lives, and consistently educate themselves by studying His Word so that they can faithfully follow its instruction and wisdom, will utterly reap the benefits in their marriage. The reason is that we ultimately live out what we believe and what we focus on. Therefore, let us focus on these things so that we can experience a Christian love that goes beyond words in our marriages.

    A MARRIAGE THAT STANDS FIRM

    Let me end by encouraging you to never neglect the freedom that we have to pursue God will all our hearts, and to actually know him and his great love, so that your marriage will stand as a clear reflection of the powerful work the Lord is doing within you.

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    Source by Eric Gomez

    Views: 0

  • My Husband Keeps Saying That He’s Going to Leave Me – Tips and Advice That May Help

    My Husband Keeps Saying That He’s Going to Leave Me – Tips and Advice That May Help

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    I recently heard from a wife who confided that every time that she and her husband disagreed or hit a rough patch in their marriage, the husband pulled out what the wife called the “leave card.” She told me: “every time things get rough, my husband says he’s going to leave. He’s packed his bags before, but he’s never actually left. Still, this hurts me and I’m getting tired of it. How can I make him see how old these threats are getting? At the same time, I’m afraid that someday soon, he’s actually going to follow through and walk out the door. I’m not sure what to do or how to handle this.”

    This type of correspondence is not all that uncommon. I hear many comments like this. And I can absolutely identify with these wives. This is a very difficult position to be in. It’s hard to move forward and to improve matters with the constant threat of him leaving hanging over your head. You can start to feel like you’re walking on eggshells or have to edit yourself or hold back in some way. So it’s very advisable to consider being proactive and addressing this before things deteriorate any more. I will discuss this more in the following article.

    Asking Him To Stop Constantly Making The Threats To Leave You And The Marriage: Admittedly, I don’t personally know this couple. But, from the little bit that the wife told me, two immediate facts jumped out and seemed most important. First, despite the husband’s repeated threats, he had not left. He was still there, repeating the same old things. This tells us that he’s either not 100% committed to leaving or he’s not yet reached the breaking point or place where it’s feasible or comfortable to move on.

    The second thing that was important was that the husband kept repeating the threats. Now, the wife was very frustrated with this, but one possibility was that the husband was repeating or accelerating his words because nothing was changing or improving and this was the only way that he knew to attempt to get the response that he wanted. Sometimes, people keep repeating the same patterns out of frustration. And, sometimes, they do this because they know no other way.

    But whatever the reason for this negative cycle, I felt that the wife might gain some ground if she approached this subject with both directness and empathy. It was going to be very hard for the two of them to get on the same page when he kept on retreating. So, the next time that he started with the “I’m just going to leave you,” talk, I felt that the wife should have asked him to sit down and talk about this for a minute.

    With a break in the action, the wife might consider telling the husband that they both knew that this was a path that they had been down many times before. And yet, nothing was really changing except that they were both getting frustrated with the same old course of events that never yielded the outcome that either of them really wanted. I suggested that the wife offer to make the husband a deal. She would genuinely listen to why he felt the way that he did and make a very honest effort to address and improve things if he would stop with threats to leave her every time things got tough.

    Understanding The Opportunity That Has Presented Itself And Taking Positive Action To Stop This Cycle: I understood why the wife doubted that she was in so great of a position, but I had to admit to her that there were some advantages that she did have. On an almost daily basis, I hear from wives who were either served divorce papers or who came home to an empty house missing a husband (because he left) with seemingly no warning whatsoever. These women would’ve loved to have had a warning period and a chance to fix things before this action was taken.

    So, while the wife was tired of all this, she had to admit that she still had a chance to make things better and to save the marriage. This was an advantage as was the fact that, despite all of his empty words and posturing, the husband was still there. Clearly, he wasn’t sure that he really wanted to leave, but he was sure that he wanted change that he wasn’t getting, which is why this cycle kept repeating itself.

    Once the wife was able to see this, she was willing to approach things differently. But, before she charged forward wanting to make drastic changes, I told her that it might be a good idea to focus on reconnecting. There was a lot of underlying resentment and anger and I felt that the changes and efforts might not last if they attempted to work things out while both people were still a little lukewarm to one another.

    Do you remember when you were first together and your issues were always little spats that passed over quickly? This is because you were deeply connected and didn’t want to allow for anything to derail that process. Sure, things change and people mature. But often, you’ll find that if you can get to a place where you feel genuine affection and empathy for your spouse, working out the remaining issues becomes so much easier and you’re much less likely to continue to hear the threats that neither one of you are listening to anymore anyway.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

    Views: 0