Tag: Coaching

  • Five Myths Of Internet Marketing For Independent Professionals

    So what does that mean for the independent professional whose web presence is primarily aimed at selling his or her own personal services? You know, services delivered the old-fashioned way, by humans interacting face-to-face or at least voice-to-voice. At best, the average professional is likely to be overwhelmed by the sheer volume of Internet marketing advice available. At worst, he or she is being seriously misled by it.
    The problem is that marketing your own professional services is simply not the same as marketing a retail product or an anonymous business service. You can’t sell corporate consulting like you do web hosting; nor can you sell life coaching the same way you do an e-book. If you try to market yourself by following advice designed for marketing Internet products and services, you’re likely to make some serious mistakes.

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    http://www.associationofmarketing.org/whitepapers/view.php?whitepaper_id=130

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  • Why Women Fail

    Why Women Fail

    The trigger thereof, as I say, will not be exterior, however inner. It lies in the identical disconcerting apprehension of the bigger realities, the identical impatience with the paltry and meretricious, the identical disqualification for mechanical routine and empty technic which one finds within the greater styles of males. Even within the pursuits which, by the customized of Christendom, are particularly their very own, girls seldom present any of that elaborately conventionalized and half automated proficiency which is the pleasure and boast of most males.

    It is a commonplace of remark, certainly, {that a} housewife who really is aware of the best way to cook dinner, or who could make her personal garments with sufficient ability to hide the actual fact from essentially the most informal look, or who’s competent to instruct her kids within the parts of morals, studying and hygiene—it’s a platitude that such a girl could be very uncommon certainly, and that when she is encountered she will not be often esteemed for her basic intelligence. This is especially true within the United States, the place the place of ladies is greater than in some other civilized or semi-civilized nation, and the outdated assumption of their mental inferiority has been most efficiently challenged.

    The American dinner-table, in fact, turns into a monument to the faulty technic of the American housewife. The visitor who respects his oesophagus, invited to feed upon its discordant and ill-prepared victuals, evades the expertise as lengthy and as typically as he can, and resigns himself to it as he may resign himself to being shaved by a paralytic. Nowhere else on the planet have girls extra leisure and freedom to enhance their minds, and nowhere else do they present the next degree of intelligence, or participate extra successfully in affairs of the primary significance. But nowhere else is there worse cooking within the residence, or a extra inept dealing with of the entire home economic system, or a bigger dependence upon assistance from exterior substitutes, by males supplied, for the ability that’s wanting the place it theoretically exists. It is unquestionably no mere coincidence that the land of the emancipated and enthroned girl can be the land of canned soup, of canned pork and beans, of complete meals in cans, and of every little thing else ready-made.

    And nowhere else is there extra putting tendency to throw the entire enterprise of coaching the minds of kids upon skilled lecturers, and the entire enterprise of instructing them in morals and faith upon so-called Sunday-schools, and the entire enterprise of creating and caring for his or her our bodies upon playground specialists, intercourse hygienists and different such professionals, most of them mountebanks.

    In transient, girls insurgent—typically unconsciously, typically even submitting all of the whereas—in opposition to the boring, mechanical tips of the commerce that the current group of society compels them to practise for a dwelling, and that rise up testifies to their intelligence. If they loved and took pleasure in these tips, and confirmed it by diligence and ability, they’d be on all fours with such males as are headwaiters, girls’ tailors, schoolmasters or carpet-beaters, and happy with it. The inherent tendency of any girl above essentially the most silly is to evade the entire obligation, and, if she can’t really evade it, to cut back its calls for to the minimal. And when some accident purges her, both briefly or completely, of the inclination to marriage (of which way more anon), and she or he enters into competitors with males within the basic enterprise of the world, the form of profession that she generally carves out gives extra proof of her psychological peculiarity.

    In no matter requires not more than an invariable technic and a feeble chicanery she often fails; in no matter requires unbiased thought and resourcefulness she often succeeds. Thus she is nearly all the time a failure as a lawyer, for the regulation requires solely an armament of hole phrases and stereotyped formulae, and a psychological behavior which places these phantasms above sense, reality and justice; and she or he is nearly all the time a failure in enterprise, for enterprise, in the primary, is so foul a compound of minutiae and rogueries that her sense of mental integrity revolts in opposition to it. But she is often successful as a sick-nurse, for that occupation requires ingenuity, fast comprehension, braveness within the face of novel and disconcerting conditions, and above all, a capability for penetrating and dominating character; and every time she comes into competitors with males within the arts, significantly on these secondary planes the place easy nimbleness of thoughts is unaided by the masterstrokes of genius, she holds her personal invariably.

    The finest and most mental—i.e., most authentic and enterprising play-actors are usually not males, however girls, and so are the perfect lecturers and blackmailers, and a fair proportion of the perfect writers, and public functionaries, and executants of music. In the demimonde one will discover sufficient acumen and daring, and sufficient resilience within the face of particular difficulties, to place the gear of any completely male occupation to disgrace. If the work of the typical man required half the psychological agility and readiness of useful resource of the work of the typical prostitute, the typical man could be always on the verge of hunger.

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  • 3 Reasons Why EVERY Entrepreneur Should Learn a Few Coaching Skills

    You would be surprised at how many times I’ve been hired (and fully paid) for copy the clients have loved but never used. Why? Well, there are as many reasons as entrepreneurs out there but a good chunk of the time it has to do with some sort of block. That’s why I’m a big believer in every entrepreneur knowing a few coaching skills (it’s certainly helped me out). Read on for 3 more reasons why EVERY entrepreneur should have a few coaching skills in their back pocket.

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    http://www.associationofmarketing.org/articles/view.php?article_id=6476

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  • Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? A Review of My Millionaire Mentor

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    My Millionaire Mentor Review

    Who wants to be a millionaire? Everyone! And yes, this opportunity promises to make you one in a matter of months. But hey, don’t we know that if there is something that sounds too good to be true, it is likely to be not true? Whenever we see any opportunity that promises a lot of money very fast, and with minimal efforts, it is natural to feel a little skeptical about it. There are thousands of such scams on the internet which claim to let you into a secret which will make you a millionaire in a matter of months. But eventually, you just end up spending your precious time and your hopes are dashed when time passes by and you make no money at all.

    However, My Millionaire Mentor seems to be slightly different from all those false promises that are strewn around the internet. So let’s try and figure out whether this is actually a good opportunity or yet another internet money making scam.

    What is My Millionaire Mentor?

    My Millionaire Mentor is Ryan Matthew’s personal website where he offers to train fifty internet newbies and teach them a six step secret which will make them earn anything from $1000 to $5000 per day. Wow! That’s a lot of money, right? But what does one have to do in order to earn this kind of money? That is precisely what millionaire Ryan Matthews wants to teach you.

    He is going to personally coach the first fifty people who sign up for this program, and he promises to let them in on the secret which has made him earn around $11 million in just two years. He adds that in order to make that whopping amount of money, he had to work for only an hour per day! When you see his San Diego beach house and his neat set of supercars, it seems like a fantasy. And when he promises that you can have all of that, it seems to be an even more unlikely proposition.

    Ryan Matthews also adds that this process is completely risk free, and does not involve going to your friends and family to sell a particular product. He makes it very clear in his promotional video that you will not be a salesperson of any kind. Moreover, he guarantees that there is no way that you can lose money by participating in this program. So what is this program all about? Read on to find out more.

    Is My Millionaire Mentor A Good Opportunity?

    In the promotional video for the company, we find people from different walks of life thanking Ryan Matthews for completely transforming their lives. One instantly identifies with those people. All of us have debts and mortgages that we struggle to pay, even though some of us work on two jobs. We spend all our days working hard to pay off our debts, while the best times of our lives just pass us by. Who wouldn’t want to spend more time with their kids rather than working in office on a Saturday night? Moreover, there are so many other financial pressures that we have on our shoulders – like college funds, home loans, health worries – that we hardly find time to follow our dreams and live our lives to the fullest.

    Thus, when an opportunity like My Millionaire Mentor comes to us, it is absolutely alluring. But the thing is, the internet is full of many financial scams which claim to transform your lives, but end up taking money from you. All of us have been disappointed many times through various such programs that claim to make us millionaires but end up taking our own hard earned money.

    So we need to be very careful before getting into any such program which offers easy money. My Millionaire Mentor states it very clearly that it is a scheme which has long term returns. On the plus side, that means that your grandchildren can enjoy the fruits of your labor. However, on the other hand, it means that it will take some time before you can earn some real money for yourself.

    How Does My Millionaire Mentor Work?

    It is clear from the promotional video on the website that the product is basically a free traffic source that you will get unlimited access to if you become a member of this program. The other benefits include special coaching by Ryan Matthews over the phone. He will personally mentor you on how to best use his product and maximize the profits for yourself. Once you become a member of what Matthews calls a secret millionaire club, you will have access to the various tips and tricks that will help you to make money. It is also mentioned in the video that the way in which you will make money is 100% legal, moral and ethical.

    So once you have access to the free traffic source, you will get clients who will pay you $1000 to $5000 a day for sending them traffic over the internet. Internet traffic is basically all the clicks that lead people to different website. According to Ryan Matthews, he has access to clients who are ready to pay that much amount of money for access to your traffic. In effect, you will be an internet traffic broker who will work with millionaire Ryan Matthews to coordinate internet traffic and redirect it to your clients.

    Basically, it is an opportunity where you will be doing affiliate marketing. Affiliate marketing is an actual money making source on the web where you get paid for traffic that you send to your client’s website. And if you have access to a good traffic source which you can turn on or off at will, it is possible that you will make a lot of money online.

    There are six steps to making this work – but that is classified information which you will get access to once you become a part of this program.

    How Can You Make the First $500 Through My Millionaire Mentor?

    In the promotional video, Matthews promises you that once you become one of the private members of the My Millionaire Mentor program, you will earn $500 and much more in the first month. In fact, you can around $5000 a day, without even leaving the comfort of your home. And to top it all, you just need a computer with an internet connection to do this job.

    In order to become a private member, the entry fee is $1000. But in effect, you pay only $49 because you are refunded $500 immediately. You get your money back immediately, and Ryan Matthews guarantees that you don’t have to spend a penny more than $49 to get into this program.

    Matthews also tells that by becoming a private member, you will get to be a part of a highly regarded company that is going to be the next big billion dollar internet empire in times to come. Though it is a speculation, in the internet age, anything is possible.

    The process which Ryan Matthews is going to teach you is actually a very simple process which many people have used on the internet in order to make money. It is called affiliate marketing. Affiliate marketing is basically a process through which you send traffic to the websites of your clients. And for each click that leads a person to your client’s website from your source, you get paid a certain amount as commission. And if you have access to a source from where you can send millions of clicks to your clients, you will seriously earn a lot of money online. So, technically, My Millionaire Mentor is a concept that could actually earn if you serious money if Ryan Matthews actually handed out a free traffic source to you.

    Pros and Cons of My Millionaire Mentor

    It is evident that this is a program which appears to have some sort of risk. But then, that is life. There are certain risks that one has to take, especially if you want to be a millionaire.

    Technically, Ryan Matthews is asking for just $49 from you for getting access to a private group where you will be coached on the secrets of making money on the internet. This scheme does not have an MLM structure, and you need not sell anything. It is absolutely legal, and all you have to do is broker internet traffic.

    Moreover, once you sign up, you get an immediate return of $500, which is a very good proposition. If you really get that money, it is a fantastic deal. Especially since you could go on to make more money in following months.

    One of the cons of this entire program is that by watching the promotional video, you get to know very little about the process. There are many things which are not spelled out clearly, which makes it difficult to take the plunge and actually subscribe to the scheme and be a part of the millionaire mentor club.

    However, the testimonials from the various people who have tried this out spells out that there are people out there who are making money from this program. And that is exactly what makes you want to go ahead and try it.

    Another con of this program is that earning money through affiliate marketing can sometimes be a very slow process. But this is something that Matthews tells you in the promotional video itself. It is a long term investment plan whereby you will take some time to earn money.

    But on the other hand, Ryan Matthews is also promising to let you on into a secret six-step process which will make the money making process much faster. So once become a part of the secret millionaire club and get to know the secret process which gives you access to more traffic, you might be able to make serious money online. And the success stories that are shared in the promotional video clearly say that people are making money quite fast. In fact, one woman said that she made more money through My Millionaire Mentor in two months than she had made in two years.

    Now, that is something!

    The biggest minus of this entire project is previous experience. Whenever we hear about something that promises to give us a lot of money without working hard, it raises our suspicions. Also, there are thousands of scams on the internet which make a fool of people who do not have sufficient knowledge about the topic and subscribe to various programs hoping to make money. In the end, they realize that all of it was a scam.

    Conclusion

    The good thing about My Millionaire Mentor is that you get to see people for whom this process has worked, and that tends to give you some courage to go ahead and take the plunge. What you need to do is hear Ryan Matthews for yourself. Go to his website and have a look at his promotional video. If you feel that what he is saying is worth giving a try, you can go ahead and become a private member of the millionaire club. It is a conscious decision that you need to take for yourself, now that you already know the pros and cons of the program.

    If you think that this is yet another money-making scam on the internet, don’t sign up for it. However, if you think that this program really has the potential to completely turn your life around, go ahead and become one of the protégés of Ryan Matthews. After all, every one of us dreams of having a Lamborghini parked at our garage, and a wonderful, spacious home from where we can see the sunset with our loved ones. There are some dreams that can be fulfilled when you become a millionaire, and if you are a person who nurses such dreams, you might want to try out My Millionaire Mentor to see what’s in store for you.

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    Source by David Morgan

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  • Wrong Reasons For Getting Married – (1) Marrying Out of Sympathy

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    There are right and wrong reasons for getting married. The worst thing a person can do to oneself is to marry a wife or husband for the wrong reason. There are quite a number of wrong reasons why people marry. One of the wrong reasons and perhaps among the most prominent of the wrong reasons is marrying out of sympathy.

    There are many scenarios under this subheading of marrying out of sympathy that relationship coaches experience in the course of counseling and coaching. Some of the most common ones are when the woman gets pregnant as a result of premarital sex and getting married to a person just because one’s brother or sister jilted that person. Between these two extremes, are those who start relationships with girls who are being maltreated by those they serve. Some men get involved with the neighborhood maids or relations of their neighbors who are being maltreated. Women fall into this kind of challenge too.

    When sympathy forms the basis for a relationship with the opposite sex, it is like playing with a keg of gunpowder over a fireplace. Sympathy is a powerful emotion. It so overpowering that it becomes difficult for the parties involved to consider the critical elements in the foundation for a joyful relationship such as friendship, understanding, compatibility etc. If the man is the one sympathizing, he is so enamored into what he sees as the Good Samaritan’s job that he does not consider what stuff the woman is made off, her attitudes, desires and mindset. He does not stop to find out what life purposes she has, what goals she is focused on and how all these could jell into his own desires. If it is the woman that is sympathizing, she goes through the same emotions and also begins to think that if she saves the young man, he would remain loyal to her forever.

    Findings, however, have shown that the truth is far from what these sympathizer-lovers are thinking. If as a result of your efforts the captive is set free, he or she will do what all captives do, “flee”. Fleeing here may not mean running away from their sympathizer-lovers, though that has been known to happen with people who confess that the only feeling they had was to escape the environment. In many instances, the sympathizer-lovers begin to act as saviors and lordships. This is usually resisted, first psychologically and later verbally. And there goes your peace and comfort.

    Marriage relationship requires that both parties are open to each other. Open – meaning that there are no secrets in their hearts that the other partner would not be allowed into. Once these secret feelings are there, it produces reactive communication instead of responsive communication.

    These sympathy missions when it emanates from the premarital sex pregnancy, the woman does not fully get happy in the relationship. This arises from the fact that as the usual challenges appear in the scene, instead of the woman finding a good reason to endure; she only thinks she is in a mess occasioned by the pregnancy. Some have confessed that if they did not get pregnant, there is no way they would end up with the man they are married to. Instead of seeing the usual marriage and child rearing challenges as learning opportunities, they mortify themselves for getting pregnant. And some of the time, they blame the man for putting them in the family way. Some blame the child that resulted from the pregnancy. Hatred for a child has been known to have grown from such situations creating lasting bitterness.

    For the men, having not evaluated the character, demeanor, temperament of their spouse before marriage because of the overpowering influence of the emotion of sympathy, when the woman shows her real character, they are usually overwhelmed. They see themselves as having made terrible mistakes. They now live the rest of their lives in regret, withdrawal or wickedness or under the influence of these three negative but powerful emotions.

    It is necessary that we have it ingrained in the tablet of our hearts that the only reasons good enough for marrying anybody are the foundational elements for joyful relationship. If while in a relationship with the opposite sex there is no opportunity to build friendship and if an understanding of the basic purpose of marriage is not clear to both of you, then there is no other reason why the relationship should continue beyond the next few hours.

    Interestingly, many marriages out there are based on sympathy.

    Young single adults (18-30 years of age) and single adults (31 years and above) should not marry anybody for the purpose of saving face or to save somebody from suffering. Instead of cornering yourselves to this quagmire, why not follow the appropriate dating, courtship and engagement practices where no sexual intimacy is included. There is need to remember that sexual intimacy is only appropriate in a legally and lawfully wedded marriage contract. You need to remember that the basic purpose of sexual intimacy is mainly for procreation and to cement companionship.

    The excitement and pleasure that accompany sexual intercourse is purposed to invite people to take the responsibility that comes with it. Any other use of sexual intimacy outside legal and lawful matrimony is a transgression of the law. And law breakers must bear the full weight of the law. In most cases, there would be no external police to arrest you and no external court to try you and no external prison to sentence you. But there are internal version of the police, the court and the prison and a large farmland where your hard labor would be performed if you commit this offense.

    What is the way to go?

    Here is the way to go. Instead of focusing on sympathy, those planning to get married should focus on what matters most – the purpose of marriage – companionship and procreation. Remember the good Lord Himself said of Adam in the scriptures: “it is not good for man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18), hence He made Eve to keep him company. Do not forget also that the same Creator gave them a commandment to “multiply and replenish the earth” (Genesis 1:28). This is the creator’s approval for sexual intimacy in marriage relationship with the intents and purposes clearly spelled out, though. Latter-day prophets have clearly stated that “sex between a man and a woman in a legal and lawful marriage is ordained of God”. These are the foundational elements that must be established before continuing in the plan for marriage with someone. Both parties ought to know and understand this fully. This knowledge and understanding would bear relationships as the foundation of a building bears it. Marrying for any other reason is like standing the building on its roof.

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    Source by Francis Nmeribe

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  • Addiction To Unrequited Love

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    The Torchbearer – S/he will love me one day

    It sounds silly for one to be addicted to unrequited love, but it can sometimes be the result of growing up in a household where love was either conditional or not consistent. As a child, the “torchbearer,” may have been always trying to win the love, praise or affection from a parent (or someone else influential) who was unavailable, abusive or failed to provide proper nurturing…. or the child could have witnessed one parent in a sort of unrequited love relationship with the other and could have taken that energy on. If it wasn’t an issue of childhood environment, then possibly some sort of other trauma occurred to upset the torchbearer’s self-esteem and their ability to feel safe receiving love. It can also result from a sudden and unexpected separation, betrayal, health, or appearance issue.

    At an existential level, the torchbearer may have developed a belief that they are not worthy of love and they may find themselves attracted to love situations that seem to keep them stuck in this dynamic: loving someone, but not able to fully receive love back. Although the person feels unworthy of love on some level, often they know they are worthy on another level, which the torchbearer then may become confused as to why they stay addicted to an unavailable person. The relationship then becomes about fantasy, idealization, avoidance, or a love-hate relationship ensues where the addict both loves and disapproves of the object of their devotion.

    According to love addiction expert Susan Peabody, the main categories of love addictions include:

    • obsessed love addicts: obsess and can’t let go even if their partners are unavailable or abusive
    • codependent love addiction: needy to please partner for sense of self
    • narcissistic love addicts: take advantage of their partner and can act disinterested, selfish or abusive and yet still feel addicted to partner and can’t let go
    • ambivalent love addicts: this category includes unrequited love addicts (also known as “torch-bearers”), saboteurs, seductive withholders, and romance addicts. The main goal through this kind of love addiction is the avoidance of true deep emotional intimacy and bonding. These addicts crave love and affection, but are afraid to get too close at the same time.

    Unrequited love addicts are part of the category of Ambivalent Love Addicts. Susan Peabody was the first to create the term “Ambivalent Love Addiction”. Her book “Addiction to Love: Overcoming Obsession and Dependency in Relationships,” is an amazing book for anyone wishing to learn more about love addiction.

    To be an ambivalent love addict, or torchbearer, means that one deeply craves love, intimacy, commitment, and unconditional love. However, at the same time, one has fears of relating deeply to another person. Such love addicts can end up pushing love away or holding it at a distance. Subconsciously, it can feel much safer for these individuals to love someone who isn’t fully there or who doesn’t want a full-on commitment. Picking an individual who is married, committed to another, distant, a player, a saboteur, or a sex addict may act to help the torchbearer avoid a true relationship. Some torchbearers end up addicted to friends or colleagues and hope the relationship will become something more.

    With many of the torchbearers that I have read, I find there is usually an excuse to continue chasing the love interest. However, there is also always a counterproductive excuse for never letting the love interest know their real feelings. It is even possible that if the object of infatuation actually returned affection or expressed desire for commitment towards the love addict, the love addict might not crave the interest anymore. One popular excuse that I have heard reads something like: “getting what I wanted or asked for took too long, therefore I no longer trust the love interest anymore, so I no longer want a relationship.” Once the love interest gives up, separation anxiety sets in again. Why does this occur? An illusion has been broken and the person idolized has become more human and less of a challenge to the ego.

    The torchbearer runs the risk that even if they obtain the object of their desire they may not achieve the closeness or intimacy they desire unless they change why they were addicted in the first place. Sometimes the addiction simply changes. An addict may transform from a torchbearer into a seductive withholder. They can even start becoming a codependent love addict if the once unrequited love relationship begins to become real.

    So, how do you know if you are addicted to unrequited love?

    What are the symptoms? The symptoms listed below are not comprehensive, but ones I typically see with clients (usually women):

    • Do you obsess over or find yourself only attracted to love interests who are not available in some way or who are married, playing you, who are “just friends,” or have left you?
    • Do you fear communication or to let the person know your interest in them, feelings, and other basic questions for fear of rejection or to keep the fantasy going? Or do you find yourself communicating but unable to accept a lack of response or a non-commital response without hoping if you wait long enough you will be wholly wanted?
    • Do you suffer in silence while you hold adoration towards someone who doesn’t really know? Some unrequited love addicts pursue their interests opening and ardently, but others can hold torches for people who they will not let themselves get close to nor let themselves be revealed in any real way.
    • Do you expect your love interest to be psychic/empathic and to just know and interpret your feelings and needs, even though there has been no grounded communication? Are you living out your relationship psychically or vicariously through “signs” or empathic feelings that the other person may be thinking about you, even if there is no contact?
    • Do you find yourself always hoping and waiting for the other person to make an interest in you known?
    • Can you never feel “close” in a real way to the person you are holding a torch for?
    • Are you always living out the relationship in your head?
    • Are you continually asking yourself many questions, wondering about the other person feelings and intentions (or potential future intentions) without ever grounding anything to test to see if any fantasies are real?
    • Do you have other addictions, such as to sex, psychics, alcohol etc?
    • Do you feel you cannot let go of the love interest even though it is not making you feel loved? Do feel powerless to stop at will.
    • Is the preoccupation with this interest having a more negative affect on you spiritually, financially and other ways than positive? In the end, are you losing more than you gain?
    • Do you have a history of being hurt or obsessing on lack of love, attention or approval by a parent or someone else influential in your earlier life?
    • For those with less intense expressions of this addiction: are you confused why you only seem to attract or are attracted to unavailable people or people who are not 100% wanting a relationship? And with this, do you feel bored with people who are into you or once a relationship starts to develop? Does it seem that all the people who would be right and loving towards you, you cannot “fall in love” with?

    If you have an “interest” that you crave but are afraid to reach out to in any real and genuine way for fear of rejection, then you might be addicted to unrequited love. You may also be addicted if there is an underlying knowledge that expressing your wants and needs would not be appropriate. I’ve talked to many clients who are totally engaged with these types of interests, sometimes even sexually. But, usually they know on some level there are certain things they cannot ask/dare put forward cause the relationship is casual though they want something more. Though the “craving” is not always required, this article is mostly written for the hard core unrequited love addict.

    Here is an example of one kind of non-communicative unrequited love addict who does have some relationship and interaction with her love interest:

    A woman starts to like an attractive man. They meet and there is some flirting — the man seems interested to the woman. Information is exchanged followed by mixed signals that mark the relationship. The woman starts obsessing and fantasizing about having a relationship with the man. However, the man won’t make a clear move and the woman ends up doing most of the contacting to keep interaction ongoing. The woman acts casual because she wants the man to make his interest known first. She is getting some cues of affection and indication of interest, but it’s kept superficial and she is always unsure. This goes on for some time, sometimes months, and she starts thinking “Does this guy really want a relationship or am I just casual or a friend?” Despite feeling a sense of unknowing and distress, the woman will never risk asking to find out. She starts asking advice from other friends who tell her to forget about the man, but she hangs on in hope he will ask for a real date or commitment or show he cares.

    The man is simply not putting out vibe of wanting a full-on relationship. However, she starts to fantasize that maybe he is just scared, can’t communicate or is insecure. She fantasizes that he will start to be more demonstrative or want something more if she can just hang in or never upset the status quo. She even wonders, “should I say something or make a move”, but something inside is telling her it’s not safe to tell this person how she feels because they are not on the same page, so she withholds keeps holding a torch for this person. She finds out the man has started to pursue someone else and she feels upset and feels betrayed. But, still, she has never had clear indication they are in a “relationship.”

    In the worst cases of unrequited love addiction I have seen, the client is addicted to psychics, using spell casters to cast spells to make their love more available, or are even asking for healing sessions on the person they are addicted to hoping healing something in their love interest will change the reality of what is going on.

    What Can You Do If This Sounds Like You?

    Often, I see two main themes running in these relationships: fear of true communication (or fear of accepting a communication or lack there of), and fear of vulnerability & rejection. Many times I also recommend torchbearers learn how to set boundaries and how to respect others boundaries. If the torchbearer is holding on waiting for a “sign” or demonstration from the love object, afraid of giving up, learning communication would help with getting out of fantasizing a relationship and making it more real. In the least, the torchbearer can get closure, if the love addict’s desires are not reciprocated.

    Getting closure isn’t always an easy thing for a love addict. It is often considered to be a harsh rejection. Many frightened unrequited love addicts wish to avoid being hurt at all costs. However, with this cost, these love addicts avoid true intimacy and relationships.

    Most unrequited love clients I work with have a shut down throat chakra. They may have been raised or learned through some experience that expressing feelings or needs is a burden on others, a sign of weakness, inferiority or something to be afraid of. Codependent types are afraid to cause any sort of confrontation or rejection for themselves. However, the only way out is through. The crux is that this dynamic is used to avoid another hurt or rejection and this continues the cycle of avoiding true commitment, intimacy and bonding.

    Step 1: Communication With Yourself

    The first step is for the torchbearers to ask themselves what they truly want from a relationship. What is their vision of how they want to be loved and committed to? This step may be one of the hardest. The unrequited love addict may be so used to avoiding confrontation that asking them to figure out what they want and need seems strange. Torchbearers ask themselves “How do I get someone who doesn’t care to do so? How can I be better? More lovable?” Simply leaving an unrequited love may not solve the problem either. It may just transfer the love addiction from one of pursuing the unrequited love interest to holding a torch and suffering in silence while pining after the loss. They may remain stuck, wondering if maybe this person is still missing them or thinking of them and it gives them hope for reconciliation.

    Step 2: Communication With Your Love Interest

    If communication is possible to ask for closure, this is the next step. I recommend asking in direct ways and not just looking for “signs.” State what you want out of love and a relationship, and ask the object of your affection if they feel they will ever be able to give it. Risk hearing the truth and risk rejection. This helps break the fantasy and though may be incredibly painful, it is the next step towards risking true intimacy and attracting the right relationship and breaking through all the fears that prevent it from coming. The whole idea of love addiction is the belief that without love one is nothing. If one can risk losing love and still see themselves as whole, then one can start going into relationships with sense of self as a sole identity which another can complement, rather than feeling another will complete them.

    Fear of intimacy (getting to know someone deeply), commitment, communication, rejection, boundaries, and confrontation needs to be challenged. Love addicts can also seem like perpetual victims or trauma junkies. So healing the need to be a victim is key too.

    Taking on the challenge of learning to set boundaries, risk confrontation and rejection, to communicate ones wants and needs (and listening to another’s – which this might be the real fear) may seem overwhelming. But, it is the only way out. All of this should be targeted, in addition to working on childhood issues, which implanted some of these fears and patterns.

    Step 3: Accepting What Is Communicated Back or Any Lack Of A Response

    Sometimes, the love addict at this stage may have been totally clear with their love interest what they want and they still feeling or receiving mixed signals. The person of their infatuation may be ambivalent, stringing them along, or afraid to just be honest and give them the closure they need. Sometimes there may be a lack of response — ie: an email is sent to the love object who appears to be avoiding sending a response back. In these cases, aim for setting a boundary for yourself on how long you will wait for what you need and stick to it. Be willing to recognize when you need to either end a relationship or at least bring it down to a more casual and detached level while you pursue other options.

    For those who find they are always making clear what they want and are still waiting to receive it or feeling unheard, the lesson may be in knowing when its time to stop voicing your needs and wants realizing they will not be met or cared for. Just affirm to yourself as much as you can that you can and are willing to find someone who can meet your wants and needs.

    Step 4: Changing and Challenging One’s Views on Love

    I also recommend changing how one views love. There is something self-absorbed in all the withholding and holding on. It is focused on fear and self-protection instead of love or generosity and true interest in another person and their needs and feelings. Many love addicts actually fool themselves into thinking their co-dependence is proof that they are being more loving than anything else. However, love is about extending and exposing oneself in the face of rejection and providing a safe and open place for someone else to extend and expose themselves. Love is not manipulative, wanting to change people or situations or waiting for such situations or people to change.

    Love is not about being a martyr either. If you can’t take a risk to know anyone else or have them tell you their wants and needs, or accept or listen when they are not on the same page, how can you expect someone to care and listen concerning your own wants and needs?

    Not all unrequited love addicts are afraid to state their wants, needs, and boundaries. But, often what can happen is the torchbearer is always stating needs and boundaries and they are not listening to what is being conveyed back. They keep hoping the love object will change, mature, or outgrow his detached stance.

    A Few Self-Help Healing Tools

    While one can always benefit from professional therapies, coaching, and alternative healing sessions geared towards transmuting thought patterns, there are a few healing tools that can be used to assist recovery from love addictions (feel free to look for others as I only mention a few here).

    If one has ever used “flower essences” before (a form of homeopathy), Australian Bush Flower Essences (www.abfeusa.com for more information) has a “Relationship Essence” which contains the following:

    • Boab: helps bring change, helps clears negative core patterns that are rooted in family and which are inherited. Can also help clear negative lines of karma that exist between individuals and past life influence.
    • Bluebell: is for those who cut themselves off from their feelings and helps to open the heart and to disolve greed and rigidity. Emotions are present but withheld and there is even fear of expressing positive emotions such as joy and love, etc through operation of fear that there is just not enough and they can’t survive if they let go of all they hold onto.
    • Bottlebrush: helps one to resolve mother issues and helps one embrace major life changes. It brushes away the past allowing individuals to move on and go forward.
    • Bush Gardenia: helps one to renew passion and interest in relationships. Helps with intimacy, and resolving where there is too much self-interest or lack of awareness in a partnership.
    • Dagger Hakea: Is for helping on to release resentments, bitterness and grudges.
    • Flannel Flower: is for those who fear emotional or physical intimacy, getting too close and who have a hard time maintaining personal boundaries. Helps one to garner trust to express ones innermost feelings.
    • Red Helmet Orchid: Helps for resolving father issues, probelms with confrontation or authority.
    • Red Suva Frangipani: Is for the rocky relationship that is challenged and is also for resolving deep sense of loss and sadness when a relationship is in trouble or has ended. Helps to heal that feeling of Wedding Bush: Is for issues with commitment to a relationship, job, goal etc. It can be used for individuals who tend to flit from one relationship to another, or for those who leave relationships when the crush phase or initial attraction has diminished.

    A book I highly recommend is Addiction to Love: Overcoming Obsession and Dependency in Relationships by Susan Peabody (co-founder of LAA).

    Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) is another tool that can help with love addictions. EFT can be easy to learn for free from demonstrations on YouTube or free downloads on various sites.

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    Source by Mandy Peterson

    Views: 0

  • Business Ethics for the Mindful Dance Professional

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    Once upon a time, a dance teacher opened her own studio down the road from her former employer’s school, taking advantage of her former teaching position to start her own studio. Sound familiar? This is an all too common story in the dance studio business and unfortunately, this is no fairy-tale.

    We have all heard a version of this story or perhaps experienced it first-hand. Poaching students–direct or indirect solicitation of another’s students–is a practice that mindlessly fragments and divides the dance community. In addition to poaching students, other subtle, but just as divisive, practices include: making negative remarks about other teachers/schools, misrepresentation of the self by making false, exaggerated, or ambiguous claims, and making disparaging comparisons or references about others.

    What drives otherwise enterprising individuals to engage in business practices that burn bridges, sow the seeds of deceit, and model mindless behavior?

    Darwin. You heard me–Darwin is to blame. Well, not really Darwin himself, but the misinterpretation of his theories into a business context is at the root of this dilemma. When the business world adopted the neo-Darwinian philosophy of “survival of the fittest”, they unleashed a ready-made excuse for unethical action.

    As a culture that witnessed the “cola wars” first hand, we picked up the idea that anything goes when it comes to business and marketing. Ethics and morals need not apply. “That’s business” they say while defending their actions. They fail to see the big picture: to look mindfully at the situation. They unknowingly hurt the larger dance profession and therefore themselves. It is a case of one’s right hand shooting one’s left and thinking this is good.

    What makes one feel justified in approaching the business of dance studios in this mindless manner?

    At the root of the neo-Darwinian business approach is a sense of isolation and scarcity. These teachers believe that it is “them against the world”–or, more directly, “them against the other local studios/teachers.” Add to this sense of isolation a sense of scarcity–that there are not enough students to go around–and you start to understand how one begins to rationalize why stealing students is necessary for survival. However, these twin concepts–isolation and scarcity–are illusions in the dance world.

    Studios fighting over the same group of students create a negative atmosphere in the community. Parents sense this negativity and choose alternative activities for their children because they seem more wholesome: the potential young dancer takes up soccer. However, in a community where more than one dance school thrives without negativity, a greater number of students enjoy dance as an activity. This greater number of students translates down the road into a greater number of future dancers, dance teachers, and, most importantly, audience members. If dance studios stopped seeing each other so much as competitors and more as colleagues, the entire dance profession would benefit.

    The solution starts as simply as making replacements: replacing mindless competition with mindful collegiality, mindless isolation with mindful interconnectedness, and mindless scarcity with mindful abundance. We must realize that the dance profession, from the smallest recreational dance class to the largest professional company, is interconnected. The entire web of the dance world is vitally linked.

    For example, the dance community is rather small in comparison with the larger world of sports. There are many more children participating in sports than the arts. Rather than interpreting this as a reason to fight for resources, we should embrace a sense of abundance. There are more than enough potential students out there to sustain every school if we focus on bringing more students into dance rather than fighting over those already there. It is to the benefit of the dance profession at every level to include more of the non-dance world inside our walls rather than put up walls within our own.

    So, how can we begin to break down the twin illusions of isolation and scarcity in the dance studio world and open our eyes to interconnectedness and abundance?

    We need to base our actions and practices on ideals that reflect the dance world as a healthy and vibrant community rather than a dire and hopeless one that lends itself to mindless behavior. Adopting a code of ethics that reinforces a mindful and wholesome outlook will not just serve as guidelines, but also help promote a positive environment for those whom they effect.

    Going forward, we all need to embrace a code of ethics that addresses these issues. The following list is nowhere near complete, but it is a place to start.

    Business Ethics for the Mindful Dance Professional

    In all professional and business relations, the dance professional shall exhibit respect, honesty, and integrity for themselves, clients, and colleagues.

    A. Respect

    A dance professional shall refrain from making negative remarks that may discredit, malign, or in any way cast reflection on the professional standing of another school/studio or teacher.

    A dance professional shall refrain from making any disparaging references to, or disparaging comparisons with, the services of others

    A dance professional shall refrain from publishing, or causing to be published, any notice, newspaper advertisement, or any other matter likely to damage or depreciate the reputation of any colleague.

    B. Honesty

    A dance professional shall accurately portray his or her qualifications or affiliations to the public especially in advertising material and avoid any ambiguity or exaggeration.

    A dance professional shall refrain from portraying his or her qualifications or affiliations to the public in a way intended to deceive the uninitiated. For example: having danced a child role in the Nutcracker with a professional company and listing it as to portray having danced professionally with the company.

    C. Integrity

    A dance professional shall refrain from directly soliciting business from another teacher or studio by approaching, in any manner the pupil, pupils or employees of another teacher and, for any reason at all, to try to induce them to join his/her school.

    A dance professional shall refrain from indirectly soliciting business from another teacher or studio by making adverse criticism against other teachers’ methods, by offering free coaching, by citing the advantages to be gained by the pupil from the change (e.g. offering roles/parts), or other similar methods.

    With each of us taking responsibility for our own actions by embracing a mindful ethical base, we can co-create a healthier, connected, and abundant environment in the business of dance schools. Moreover, with all we have in common, we might just discover we make better friends than enemies.

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    Source by James Robey

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  • What Is Wealthy Affiliate?

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    Wealthy Affiliate is an online community membership site founded in 2005 by two online marketers Carson and Kyle. It has become the number one community for creating and growing a successful online business.

    Wealthy Affiliate is a training website with a massive online community who engage with one another and offer help and support.

    Who Can Profit From Wealthy Affiliate University?

    Wealthy Affiliate (WA) makes the program available for everyone, including those who don’t have enough money to pay high prices for training or have a limited budget. WA offers instruction for people with different skill levels, from newbie’s up to experienced marketers.

    People Who Can Benefit From WA:

    Internet Marketers

    Local businesses and companies

    Online merchants

    Local marketers

    People that want to build their own website(s)

    People that want to sell their products online

    Retired people, looking for an extra income

    Individuals looking for a trusted hosting platform

    Students

    People who want to turn their hobby into an additional income

    Bloggers and website owners that want to improve their web sites

    Artist/Bands/Musicians Churches and Non-Profits.

    What Wealthy Affiliate Is Not?

    WA is not a “get rich quick” scheme. WA IS NOT AN MLM program and you do not need to build a massive down line to make money from the program. There isn’t a prerequisite to sell WA itself. You will not get rich overnight, unless you are a skilled marketer. The platform will teach you how to make money online.

    It will help you to build a solid online business that will endure for a long time, along with live support that you will need to soften the notion of doing it alone.

    How much does it cost to join Wealthy Affiliate?

    Wealthy Affiliate Starter Membership – Free.

    Premium Membership – $47 month or $359 yearly.

    If you upgrade to the premium membership within 7 days your first month access will only be $19.00

    Wealthy Affiliate General Overview

    There are several types of training that are available to members and it has everything from email marketing, list building, SEO, PPC marketing, article marketing, website development and technical training. The database has more than 300 teaching lessons and each month more resources are added.

    The training is attuned to suit every ones needs and includes:

    Video training

    Tutorial Training

    Classrooms on specific topics

    Question and Answers

    Live weekly training classes

    Task based Courses

    Participate in interactive discussions

    Why Do You Need WA?

    Affordability – Usually when people see all the upgrades or up-sells for different products or services, they automatically enter a negative mindset because they know that if they do not earn quickly, they will lose a huge sum of money. Most people start on a small budget and simply cannot afford to pay for expensive advertising or constant upgrades.

    Wealthy Affiliate has a free option and members can experiment with the program without any obligations, especially if they are not sure about the direction they want to take in the online marketplace. The premium membership is at a fixed rate and that gives members the freedom to work on a budget without having to be concerned about working harder just to upgrade to another level.

    All in one platform – To become successful online, we all need more services like hosting, a blog or website, content and various tools to run our businesses successfully. These services and tools can add up to a costly amount when you put it all together, and new as well as existing online entrepreneurs struggle immeasurably to keep up when they don’t earn from the internet quickly. Wealthy Affiliate has done a great job at adding the essential tools and services into one platform to get new marketers to get that critical head start.

    Website Builder and Hosting – WA allows you to use WordPress (WP) Express to build your own WP optimized blog and SiteRubix powers it. WordPress had become the most popular blogging platform with dozens of templates to choose from. You can choose to run the blog on a free siterubix.com domain or link it to your own. SiteRubix has a remarkable reputation and websites that are hosted on the service tend to do exceptionally well compared to other hosting companies.

    Coaching and Support – New online entrepreneurs are not able to get successful by themselves. If you have questions, they will get answered! The customer support is quick to respond and aids members with any issues that they might run into. Carson and Kyle are actively partaking along with members to answer questions personally. That alone shows the great amount of dedication they have when it comes to helping members.

    People who have absolutely no clue about earning an income online enter this marketplace on a daily basis and the World Wide Web has tons of “money-making” programs, products and tutorials that confuse new marketers badly enough and even cause a massive amount of people to fall into scams or empty promises.

    It has been proven that most successful online marketers had a mentor or support program that guided them into becoming successful. This is the best active community online and many methods to communicate are available like; a live chat box, questionnaire option, forum, active dashboard and micro blog communication.

    There is no negativity or judgmental behavior like we see in the public forums, only quality conversations. You will be able to network with like-minded marketers and meet countless people who will share ideas or support one another.

    Inspiration – Without motivation, it is hard to complete anything in life, not to mention starting up an online business. Wealthy Affiliate keep their learners motivated by setting up goals and then reward those who had met the goals by giving away something of value. For most people it is much easier to reach success when they have something to work towards that is worth the effort.

    Wealthy Affiliate will most certainly not make you rich and it will not make you successful. In the end the decision to take action will all be in your hands and no amount of training or support can replace free will. The law of sowing and reaping is how you will receive your harvest.

    What Is Wealthy Affiliate?

    Wealthy Affiliate is someone who unites with others of like-mindedness, on the terms of having and obtaining legitimate unlimited wealth.

    WA gives you all the building materials, but the rest will be up to you. Getting started is always the hardest part, but with the right motivation and positive attitude there is absolutely no reason to fail.

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    Source by Jamie Clay

    Views: 0

  • 7 Step Sales Process of High Income Auto and RV Sales Professionals

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    High income car and RV salespeople follow a 7 step sales process.

    They follow the sales process on each and every contact. No exceptions.

    There is no deviation. No skipping steps. It just doesn’t happen.

    Automobile Sales an Art AND a Skill

    Rembrandt was considered one of the greatest painters in European history. Do you know who Pieter Lastman or Jacob van Swanenburgh were? Rembrandt apprenticed under each of them.

    What does that have to do with car and RV sales people? Nothing. And everything.

    Everything, that is, if you want to be a top income earner.

    To be a Rembrandt you need coaching. You need sales training. You need practice to develop your style, your talent, your selling techniques.

    The art is the finesse.

    For prospective buyers, it is bringing to reality what works for them without manipulation, without shady tactics or tricks.

    Professional selling technique is the ability to listen intently, ask relevant value adding questions, and package it all in a vehicle that meets the prospect’s needs and budget.

    7 Step Automobile and RV Sales Process – Work It!

    Walk into McDonald’s anywhere in the world and you will find the same friendly smiles, although the faces may be different. You will see a similar menu, although reading it may be difficult. You will find the same production process.

    The recipe, like a sales process, works.

    It works for McDonald’s. It works for Wendy’s. It works for Tim Hortons. It works for the Colonel along with a whole regiment of other franchises. And the 7 Step Sales Process of top automobile and RV sales income earners will work for you.

    Exceptions Yes Life Happens

    Will there be exceptions? You bet.

    Even in the most well oiled system, glitches surface from time-to-time. There is occasional franchisee – franchisor incompatibility. There are occasional let downs in traffic expectations compared to market analysis. There are occasional language challenges.

    Reality is, in all things, there will be occasional surprises.

    So what. Move on.

    Like the franchise system, the following 7 Step Automobile and RV Sales Process works.

    And, yes, there will be exceptions. There will be the cash buyer who insists on a large discount. There will be the prospect whom you just cannot settle on a vehicle. There will be… There will be… There will be…

    There will be exceptions, the occasional incompatibility for whatever reason. Move on. The sales model works consistently, with an occasional exception.

    7 Step Sales Model

    The 7 Step Sales Model of high income automobile salespeople and RV sales people is:

    1. Introduction

    2. Qualification

    3. Selection / Presentation

    4. Demonstration

    5. Negotiation

    6. Application

    7. Preparation / Delivery

    That’s it.

    To close more deals, follow these steps each and every opportunity. No exceptions.

    By the way, career automobile salespeople and RV sales professionals have an 8th step – Progression, moving the new Customer to a walking, talking referral machine.

    Wanna be car sales guys and gals just cannot seem to grasp this.

    Write me for more detail about Progression. It is where the big dollars are!

    Remember: Nothing happens until someone sells something.

    Sales Champions – People Like You – Make It Happen!

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    Source by Jeffrey Doucet

    Views: 0