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  • Can A Spouse Have An Emotion-Based Revenge Affair And Not Realize It?

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    I get a decent amount of correspondence about revenge after an affair. Sometimes, the faithful spouse wants to (or is considering) doing something to get revenge. Other times, they are feeling the urge to want revenge but they are trying desperately to resist that urge because they know that it is not really going to help anything.

    Other times, I hear from the cheating spouse who is scared of revenge or who thinks that they might be seeing vengeful behavior (even if their spouse denies this.) Here is an example. A husband might say: “I really can not effectively tell you how sorry I am that I cheated on my wife. I really don’t know what I was thinking. And in fact I probably wasn’t thinking clearly at all. I believe that my children are the only reason that my wife did not leave me. But although she’s still here, at times she looks at me with pure hatred. Her opinion of me has obviously changed. Where she used to respect me, now she acts as if I have low morals and am just a jerk. She doesn’t really listen when I talk and half the time she rolls her eyes at me and doesn’t even try to engage me with conversation. For the past three weeks, she has been spending a lot of time with a male coworker. I didn’t say anything at first because she gets mad at me so easily. Plus I thought it would hypocritical of me to insinuate that I don’t want her to have male friends when I am the one who had an affair. But last night we were spending time with our kids and the guy called. So I lost patience and asked her about it. She said that it was her job to train the guy at work and that they had become ‘close.’ She says he makes her laugh and feel good in a way she hasn’t for a long time. I got flustered and asked her if she thought that the relationship had crossed a line and had become an emotional affair. She got very angry. She said that the last thing she would do is start up an affair considering how my affair pretty much ruined our lives. She said that she was not that stupid. But now I’m wondering if perhaps she’s started an emotional affair for revenge without even knowing it. Is that possible?”

    Anything is possible. As a spouse who has been cheated on, I can tell you that there is a vulnerability there. Being cheated on makes you doubt yourself. It makes you wonder if anyone will ever find you attractive again. It makes you wonder if everyone is going to see you as damaged. So when a man show interest in you, allows you to confide in him, and boosts your confidence, this can feel like a relief. It can feel as if it’s just what the doctor ordered. And if your spouse gets jealous and insecure, well, perhaps he deserves it.

    At the same time, I am only speaking for myself when I say that although I would have welcomed any attention, I would have never made my situation worse by actually cheating. Our family life was so broken at the time that there was no way that I was going to add to my problems by adding another infidelity into the mix. I was not in any state to be in any sort of romantic relationship.

    I’m not saying that this is how your wife feels. I can’t possibly know that. However, I also can tell you that plenty of women have men friends at work, with there being nothing inappropriate about it. Adults are capable of having friends of the opposite sex without cheating. So your wife having a relationship with a male coworker doesn’t necessarily mean that you have anything to worry about.

    Rather than accuse your wife of something that might not be true and making her feel defensive, I would place my focus on your marriage and your relationship with her rather than placing your focus on her relationship with him. Because if you can work through the issues and strengthen your marriage, then you will have more confidence that you have nothing to worry about. And your wife won’t have the need to get her emotional needs met elsewhere.

    She may not even be consciously trying to do anything inappropriate. She may just be finding relief in having someone to interact with. And it may be nothing to worry about. But, if it gives you a bad feeling, there is nothing wrong with trying to bump up your attempts to improve your marriage and to strengthen your intimacy as quickly as you can. The sooner she is getting her emotional needs met by you, the sooner she will no longer need to get it from someone else, assuming that’s what is happening right now. That said, it’s possible that you are very sensitive about something that is innocent due to the affair.

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    Source by Katie Lersch

    Views: 0

  • Dousing the Flames of Marital Conflict

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    Conflicts in marriage are endemic. Because this is a union of two distinct individuals each with his or her own likes, dislikes, prejudices and pet peeves, conflicts are built into the marriage packet. As the famous evangelist Billy Graham once said, “For a married couple to expect perfection in each other is unrealistic. The unblemished ideal exists only in ‘happily-ever-after’ fairy tales. ‘Happily incompatible’ is a good adjustment.”

    No human relationship can exist in a permanent state of happiness, and conflicts need not be viewed as a sign of instability or impending rupture of marriage. Couples need to master the art of quarreling constructively and resolving all conflicts positively. A mature approach will increase understanding and trust, and strengthen their relationship. However this depends on their level of commitment to each other.

    Areas of conflict:

    o Finance: In this consumer-oriented society of today, money or the lack of it can lead to conflict. Spouses have different spending habits. Overspending or unnecessary spending by one partner can upset the family budget, leaving less money for essentials. Entertainment, alcohol, consumer goods can eat into one’s pocket. Similarly miserliness will also trigger conflict.

    o When the needs, wants and desires of one partner are not met, there is a tendency to be irritable or argumentative over trifles.

    o Domination: When one partner is excluded from the decisions that affect them both, friction is bound to arise. Similarly, procrastination by one partner on issues that need urgent decisions can be annoying.

    o In-laws: Too much interference or over dependence of in-laws can become a bone of contention. Unfair references and comparisons lead to quarrels.

    o Children: Different styles of parenting or lack of proper parenting skills can result in heated arguments.

    o Sex: Husbands and wives have exclusive conjugal rights over their partners. Depriving a spouse of normal sexual activity creates tension in the relationship.

    o Working wives: Some women with high tech jobs may not have quality time to spend with husband and children. Stress, fatigue or overwork can sap them of strength and put them in an irritable frame of mind.

    o Habits: Drinking, smoking, gambling or drug taking are frequent causes of conflict.

    o Social activities. Time consuming parties or games leave very little time to spend with each other.

    o Physical and emotional abuse.

    o Self-centeredness.

    o Secrecy: Keeping important secrets from each other is a breach of trust.

    o Infidelity.

    The mark of a good marriage is not the absence of conflict, but how each partner deals with the problem. Conflict is like an ember with the potential to spark into a flame, and if not doused in time, can blaze into a conflagration. The foremost thing to remember is that it is not a battle between enemies. It is just a disagreement between spouses who have promised to love and cherish each other till the end of their lives.

    “Many marriages would be better if both husband and wife realize that they are on the same side,” says Zig Ziglar.

    The aim must be to diffuse the situation by proper resolution, so that it does not crop up again and again.

    There are two options available.

    1.The Negative Approach which will generate hostility.

    2.The Positive Approach which will make the bonds of marriage stronger.

    Negative Approach:

    – One partner personalizes the problem and treats it as an attack. Women are more prone to this approach. They withdraw into themselves and wallow in self pity. Withdrawal may be physical, sexual or emotional. Breach of communication follows. This is a dangerous trend. A trivial problem festers in the mind until it assumes gigantic proportions.

    – Angry reactions like yelling, crying, abuse, sarcasm, insults or even violence are disastrous. The idea obviously is to hurt the other person while defending one’s self in the blame game.

    As Broderick said, “Couples who vent their anger and do nothing to get at its cause and cure are committing marital suicide.”

    Positive Approach:

    1. Couples should never communicate when angry. They should first think things over calmly by themselves and then discuss the issue. Privacy is important. Discussions should not take place in the presence of their children or relatives, but in a quiet place where there will be no interruptions. They must bear in mind at all times that they are allies and not adversaries. There must be eye contact throughout the discussion. Respect for each other’s feelings is important. So the tone of voice and body language must be appropriate. Listening carefully to the other’s point of view is showing respect. Questions and clarifications are in order. It is also a time to share one’s genuine hurts and frustrations. Generalizations like ‘You always find fault’ or ‘You never listen’ are not helpful.

    2. The core issue must be tackled. It is important to define and discuss only the problem that started the conflict. Is the problem repetitive? Is there a recurring pattern? If so, why has the problem not been resolved before? There should be no deviation into unrelated issues. Old problems must not be dredged up and recycled to score a point.

    3. Finance can be a contentious subject. Bad financial habits must be mended. Budgeting one’s income is important. If expenses go beyond the budgeted amount, there should be a discussion on how best to make good the deficit. Honest conversations about purchases, savings and overspending will help. It might require lowering one’s standard of living or finding other ways of income generation.

    4. Sex is an important aspect of marriage. Withholding sex by one partner as a means of punishing the other, is hurtful. Sex enhances intimacy and reconciliation.

    5. Spouses must take responsibility for their contribution to the problem. They should be willing to change their behaviour if necessary. Owning up faults and admitting their weaknesses will diffuse tension. Sometimes it may even be necessary to give into the partner’s wishes, even though not fully agreeable. It is important to focus on what is right and not on who is right. Compromise is by no means weakness. It reflects strength and helps resolve the problem permanently.

    6. Forgiveness is the most important salve that will heal the hurt of conflict. Couples should be generous in forgiving each other’s faults. It may not be easy, but it is always better to get it over with and move on.

    Conflicts in marriage are inevitable. Fault finding and negativity can destroy and tear apart relationships. ‘Let not the sun go down upon your wrath,’ advises Scripture. With proper communication, tolerance and commitment, most conflicts can be resolved.

    As Alexander Perry said, “The ultimate test of a relationship is to disagree but to hold hands.”

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    Source by Eva Bell

    Views: 0

  • Creativity and Entrepreneurship

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    We will commence our assignment with a discussion of sources of new ideas. We will then examine methods of generating ideas, creative problem solving, the product planning and development process, and then e-commerce. We will then generate several new ideas using brain writing, the checklist method, and free association. We will apply the product development stage to our new ideas and end our discussion with two alternatives to e-commerce.

    Sources of new ideas include consumers, existing products and services, distribution channels and even the Federal Government (Hisrich, 2008). The files of the patent office are full of new ideas and new product ideas can form as a result of government regulations. Research and development is the largest source of new ideas and can occur in a formal lab or in a garage or basement.

    Many methods can be use to generate new ideas. In focus groups, a moderator leads a group of people through open, in-depth discussions. These groups generally consist of eight to fourteen participants. They are stimulated by comments from other group members in creatively conceptualizing and developing a new product idea to fill a market need. Focus groups are also an excellent way to screen ideas and concepts. Problem inventory analysis is another great method of generating new ideas. It uses individuals in a manner that is similar to that of focus groups. Consumers are provided with a list of problems in a general product category and are then asked to identify and discuss products in this category that have the particular problem. This method should be used primarily to identify product ideas for further evaluation.

    Creative problem solving takes the generation of new ideas to a higher level. Brainstorming allows people to be stimulated to greater creativity by meeting with others and participating in organized group experiences. Rules include the following:

    a) Criticism not allowed

    b) Freewheeling is encouraged

    c) Quantity of ideas is desired

    d) Encourage combinations and improvements of ideas

    Brainstorming should be fun and not contain any domination or inhibition of discussion. It is highly effective in groups of six to twelve individuals and can generate ideas about a problem within a limited time frame through the spontaneous contributions of participants. Reverse brainstorming offers a different perspective as it is similar to brainstorming, except criticism is allowed. It is based on finding fault by asking in how many ways an idea can fail. The focus is on the negative aspects of a product, service, or idea. One must be careful to maintain group's morale though. Reverse brainstorming can be used prior to other forms of creative techniques to stimulate innovative thinking and involves the identification of everything wrong with an idea. It is usually worthwhile since is easier for people to be critical about an idea instead of coming up with a new one.

    Brainwriting is a form of written brainstorming and gives participants more time to think than brainstorming. It is silent and each group member writes down three ideas within five minutes. A form is passed around to all participants while a leader monitors time intervals and can even modify them. The Gordon method is another method of creative problem solving and begins with group members not knowing the exact nature of a problem. This ensures that a solution is not clouded by preconceived ideas and behavioral problems. A general concept associated with the problem is mentioned and the group then expresses a number of ideas. A concept is then developed and related concepts are developed. Finally, the actual problem is revealed.

    The checklist method involves the development of a new idea through a list of related issues or suggestions. The following questions demonstrate how the checklist method is used:

    ii.Put to other uses? New ways to use as-is?

    iii.Adapt? What else like this? What could I copy

    iv.Modify? New twist? Change meaning, color, form, shape?

    v.Magnify? What to add?

    vi.Minify? What substitute? Smaller?

    vii.Substitute? What else instead? Other material?

    viii.Rearrange? Other pattern?

    ix.Reverse?

    x.Combine? Blend?

    Free association is another form of creative problem solving and is one of the simplest and yet most most effective methods. It is helpful in developing an entirely new slant to a problem. First, a word or phrase related to a problem is written down. Then other ones are written down and so on. Each new word attempts to add something new to the ongoing thought processes. This creates a chain of ideas ending with a new product idea.

    The product planning and development process is crucial to an entrepreneur's success. One must first establish evaluation criteria by assessing the market opportunity and size. One must evaluate current competing producers, prices, and marketing efforts. New idea should have synergy with existing management capabilities and marketing strategies. The proposed product or service idea should be able to be supported by and contribute to a company's financial well-being. One should evaluate the compatibility of a new product's production requirements with existing plant, machinery, and personnel. Entrepreneurs should be concerned with formally evaluating an idea throughout its evolution. The idea stage involves identifying new product or service ideas while eliminating impractical product or service ideas.

    One must determine the need for the new idea as well as its value to the company to ensure both prior to proceeding with the ideas. The need determination should focus on the type of need, its timing, the users involved with trying the product or service, the importance of controllable marketing variables, the overall market structure, and the characteristics of the market. In the concept stage, a new product should be developed further and refined through interaction with consumers. The refined idea is then tested to determine consumer acceptance. Features, price, and promotion should be evaluated for the concept being studied and any major competing products. The product development stage involves determining consumer reactions to the physical product. An entrepreneur can provide samples in this stage. The final stage of the development process consists of the test marketing stage, which provides actual sales results that indicate the acceptance level of consumers.

    E-commerce is a relatively new concept in the business world and should be used creatively. An entrepreneur must address additional specific issues due to continually-evolving technology. For instance, one must decide if he will run the internet operations of the business or outsource the task to another firm. A website is often created and must be aesthetically-pleasing and fully functional. Ninety percent of small businesses use websites and ease of use is important with websites. The website is a communication vehicle in which search capability and speed are equally important. A website should have a shopping cart, secure server connection, credit card payment processing, and a customer feedback feature. It should be customized for specific target market groups and should be compatible with various browsers.

    The tracking of customer information is vitally important when dealing with e-commerce. This is often accomplished via electronic databases. Doing so supports personal marketing and captures customer attention with customized one-to-one marketing. It is critically important to protect the privacy of individuals when keeping databases.

    When conducting e-commerce as an entrepreneurial company, one's products should be able to be delivered economically and conveniently. Products must be interesting to a large number of people and a company must be prepared to ship products out of its geographic location. Online operations must bring significant reductions in cost as compared to having a store.

    We now turn our attention to the generation of clothing ideas for Libya. We utilized brainwriting with a time limit of five minutes to come up with a new idea. We drafted an adjustable robe for women that can be rolled up and then attached with velcro to shorten it when desired to offer additional clothing and styling capabilities. We then used the checklist method and came up with the following:

    xi.Modify? New twist? Change meaning, color, form, shape?

    a) Can offer robe in multiple colors such as white, red, and blue

    xii.Substitute? What else instead? Other material?

    a) Can make robes out of breathable polyester / nylon material as used in athletic wear

    b) Allows for wicking away of sweat and moisture to keep clothing dry and light in weight

    We then used free association to come up with a list of related words:

    -xiii.cooling, light weight, windproof, light colors, reflective material xiv. End result is metallic-colored fabric that will reflect sunlight like aluminum foil

    We then applied product development stages to the new ideas to formulate a final product concept. We first established our evaluation criteria by assessing market opportunity and size. The population of Libya is 6,173,579, so this will serve as our potential market (Wikipedia, 2009). We then turned to the idea stage to identify new product ideas. These ideas included the following thought process:

    a) Can offer robe in multiple colors such as white, red, and blue

    b) Can make robes out of breathable polyester / nylon material as used in athletic wear

    c) Roll-up velcro to shorten robe for greater cooling and comfort

    d) metallic-colored fabric that will reflect sunlight like aluminum foil

    xv.Eliminate impractical product / service ideas in this stage

    a) Metallic-colored fabric will be eliminated

    b) Reflecting sun can create an oven effect on wearer

    c) Can actually make customer hotter and not cooler

    xvi.Determine the need for the new idea as well as its value to the company to ensure both prior to proceeding with ideas

    a) Multiple robe colors will appeal to different people

    b) Wicking-material robe will appeal to men more

    c) Roll-up robe will appeal to women more

    d) Can result in greater sales and market share

    e) Is beneficial to company to sell more robes while meeting individual needs of customers via mass customization

    We then moved on to the concept stage to further develop and refine our new product ideas through interaction with consumers. We plan on participating in trade shows to present our new ideas. We will display prototypes and obtain feedback from potential customers. Our refined ideas will then be tested to determine consumer acceptance. We will take consumer ideas into consideration and tweak prototypes accordingly. We will then consider the pricing and products of our competition and price our products accordingly to maintain a competitive edge. In the product development stage, we will determine consumers' reactions to the physical product by allowing customers to try our robes on at trade shows. We will then participate in the test marketing stage by proving actual sales results once our products enter the market.

    Alternatives for the use of e-commerce in conducting one of the product development stages for the actual commercialization of our final product idea can involve the creation of a company website that is easy to use. We will incorporate powerful search capabilities while ensuring that our site performs with acceptable speed. We will include a shopping cart, secure server connection, credit card payment, and customer feedback feature in our website. In addition, our website will be customized for specific target market groups and be compatible with various browsers. We will also track customer information by creating an electronic database that supports personal marketing. This will allow us to capture customers' attention with customized one-to-one marketing while protecting the privacy of individuals via strong database encryption. Incorporating online operations will bring significant reductions in cost as compared to having a store. This will allow us to pass savings on to customers via lower prices and greater value.

    Bibliography

    Hisrich, Robert D., Peters, Michael P., and Shepherd, Dean A. (2008). Entrepreneurship
    (7th ed.). Boston: McGraw-Hill Irwin.

    Wikipedia (2009). Libya. Retrieved July 23,2009 from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Libya .

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    Source by Bobby Mobini

    Views: 0

  • How To Marry A Millionaire!

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    Exclusive Online Dating Services – or How to Marry A Millionaire

    Whether you're rich or wanting to marry someone rich – there are online dating services which target the wealthy and provide a personal service to their clients.

    So, are they for real, or just a con to make you get your credit card out?

    Checking for "exclusive dating" on the internet came up with four top online dating sites: –

    DatingAgency.com

    This is a professional looking site, has nice photos of it's clients but there's nothing to indicate that you could find a millionaire or millionaires here – though you might find love.

    MillionaireMatch.com

    This is a website that is targeted at successful professionals who are probably too busy to get out and about and date. They describe a millionaire as someone who earns $ 150,000 and more annually.
    However, the site does also point out that you don't need to be rich and famous to enjoy the site and it is open to those earning rather less than $ 150,000!

    Berkeley-Sweetingham.com

    This is truly exclusive dating with a service and price tag to match. Just reading some of the magazine articles quoted on the site is enough to make you realise that this is out of the ordinary league and reserved for those with a few million to spare.

    If you're not in that category, it's worth a visit to the site just to find out how the "other half" lives. Would you fly to Nice (in the south of France) for a date for the day – well, you get the idea!

    Marry-an-ugly-millionaire-online-dating-agency.com

    If you need a good laugh and want to enjoy a very amusing, completely spoof online dating site – you'll want to check this out.

    Someone with a good sense of humor set this site up and it's clearly popular – and rightly so. If you're fed up with the online dating scene – this is the ONLY site for you to visit.

    And finally …

    There are plenty of genuine sites out there that offer free trials for men and women simply looking for love. Take advantage of these to find out which sites and forums you enjoy and best of luck!

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    Source by Jennifer C

    Views: 0

  • Find a Vaginal Yeast Infection Cure That Actually Works – 7 Simple Solutions You Can Use From Today

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    More and more women are seeking natural cures for Candida which we commonly refer to as a yeast infection. Of all the available treatments out there the holistic treatments are some of the only ones that have actually been proven to work. So it is possible to find a vaginal yeast infection cure that actually works, and works fast?

    Healthy bacteria is necessary for the body to survive, but when the fungus Candida albicans begins to multiply it causes infections in the body. Vaginal yeast infections can be very embarrassing, painful and annoying, so it is important to treat the infection as soon as it is discovered because it can spread and get worse.

    A vaginal yeast infection cure that is natural will target the Candida albicans and promote the development of healthy bacteria at the same time. By controlling and limiting the growth of the yeast it is possible to get rid of all the uncomfortable symptoms that such an infection brings, and more importantly prevent future infections from occurring.

    Natural cures provide immediate relief from the itching, burning, pain. and the many other annoying symptoms that the infection causes.

    Have you tried various pills, creams and douches to cure your infection without success?

    Diet is one of the biggest factors causing in yeast to grow and multiply in the body. Try these 7 home remedy solutions today for immediate relief from symptoms.

    Keep the vagina clean and dry

    • To relieve itching and burning, healing needs to occur so keep your vagina clean and dry. When you use the bathroom wipe your vagina completely. Put some unscented some powder on it, like Goldbond powder or baby powder. Goldbond powder should take away some of the itch, and if there is any burning from any sores it should take that away too.Use an unscented soap like Neutrogena bar face soap when taking a shower.
    • Do not use toilet paper with dye in it.
      Diet

    • Eat one clove of organic garlic in the morning, chopped, with a glass of water. Garlic is a natural fungicide which will kill candida.
    • Avoid brewer’s yeast or foods rich in yeast.
    • Eliminate all sugar such as soft drinks, cookies, added sugar in your tea and coffee from your diet.Yeast feeds on sugar so you need to starve the yeast. After your yeast infection is gone you should also watch how much sugar you eat or drink so that the yeast does not reoccur.
    • Take a probiotic like Acidophilius each day. Your body needs good bacteria and the Acidophilus will help to get rid of the bad bacteria. You can also use yogurt that contains Acidophilus.
      At home treatments

    • Sit in a tub of warm water about hip deep for 20 minutes using 1 cup salt (base)and 1 cup vinegar (acid). This will bring the ph of the vagina to 4.5.
      If your yeast infection is very painful put one big fresh clove of garlic into your vagina. Do not put it too far though. Leave it in for a few hours or overnight. Thus will relieve the pain quite fast.

    If you are suffering from yeast infections you surely don’t have time to waste on treatments that do not offer immediate relief, or keep the infection from coming back. The best cures available will isolate the Candida albicans and kill it, not only will this make the yeast infection symptoms go away but they will help you to avoid future yeast infections all together.

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    Source by Marissa Nathan

    Views: 0

  • The Central Theme of Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki – Look For Assets Not Liabilities

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    Rich Dad Poor Dad has been reviewed by many writers. The book, written in 1997 by Robert Kiyosaki, immediately became a success. The concepts expressed therein are the foundation of Robert Kiyosaki’s Rich Dad book series.

    Rich Dad Poor Dad expresses a number of concepts that seem contrary to the established norms of accounting and finance. Robert Kiyosaki defines an asset as anything that puts money in your pocket and a liability as something that takes money away from your pocket.

    In Rich Dad Poor Dad and indeed the entire Rich Dad series, Robert Kiyosaki encourages his readers to look for assets and avoid liabilities. This is the key message to those who want to become wealthy and prosper financially.

    Based on the definition of assets and liabilities is the concept of making money work for you instead working hard for money. Money works consistently and diligently for a wise owner multiplying beyond expectations. You cannot become rich by working for money.

    You earn passive income when you get your money to work for you, a concept explored exhaustively in Rich Dad Poor Dad. Passive income is the foundation of wealth as it gives leverage to your efforts. After setting up an income stream, it continues to make you money while you sleep.

    The Rich Dad Corporation has three main shareholders: Robert Kiyosaki, his wife Kim Kiyosaki and Sharon Lechter. The three of them are co-founders of the RDPD Corporation under which they have produced a range of RDPD books.

    Kim Kiyosaki has written her own line of Rich Women, Poor Women which is based on the same basic principles expressed in Rich Dad Poor Dad but is directed to a different audience altogether. Riding on the back of her husband, Kim Kiyasaki’s books have also been very successful, drawing millions of satisfied readers.

    Robert Kiyosaki has influenced the lives of millions around the world through his books, helping many to become aware and get rid of doodads, thus eliminating liabilities from their financial life. He has conducted millions of seminars and training programs. He is dedicated to educating humanity in business principles and handling of personal finances, thus helping them to escape poverty.

    The Rich Dad Series gives many practical examples of how to grow money using real estate, the stock market and business. The books confirm Robert Kiyosaki’s qualities as educator and motivator, and his understanding of economics and money concepts. Employing skills as educator and his knowledge of money matters, Robert Kiyosaki has been able to build an empire on the concepts expressed in Rich Dad Poor Dad.

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    Source by Robert Mato

    Views: 0

  • 5 Tips for Dating Slavic Women

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    Depending on how young is the lady you fancy and where she had grown up (in a western country or somewhere in Russia, Belarus, or Ukraine), she will behave more or less like the typical Slavic woman. Girls who grew up in western countries may behave similar to western females. But if she finished school in countries of the post-USSR, then she definitely will have some specific expectations that you need to take in consideration in your approach.

    1. Dress up.

    A well dressed man is a pleasant sight for most females. But Slavic women dating rule book has a special place for an elegant man, as Russian, Ukrainian ladies love to dress up themselves. If you look sloppy, she will not feel comfortable and may decide you are not a suitable match. Wearing a jacket, nice pants, and a collared shirt with laced-up shoes will make you look more attractive for women of Slavic origin.

    2. Bring flowers.

    Most westerners think it’s too much to give a woman flowers on the first date. But if a woman is from the former USSR, she expects it as a necessary gesture of adherence to the polite courtship ritual (as opposed to a guy simply trying to pick her up). FSU dating culture still insists on a man bringing a bouquet for a lady on the first date, or she will think you do not respect her. How do you find out if the Slavic girl you have a date with expects flowers from a man? Ask her if she likes flowers. If she says, “Of course!”, then ask her what kind of flowers she likes. If she can give you an instant answer, she is definitely into the “flower dating culture” and you are safe to bring a bunch of pretty blossoms. (Sure, if she says she doesn’t like flowers, no need to do it.)

    3. Court her.

    Courting means looking after your girl on a date as if she was a dainty lady: Open doors, move chairs, offer your hand when she exits a car, hold her coat for her to slip in. Things that gentlemen used to do for their ladies in 1950s. (Ask your grandmother if you struggle to understand what it’s all about.) These little gestures are still in vogue among Slavic girls and she will be really impressed, as most westerners don’t do it. That’s a sure way to separate yourself from all the other guys trying to woo her.

    4. Make decisions.

    Every Slavic girl wants to meet a “real man”. What does she mean by that? Someone who is decisive and confident. This means, book a restaurant (you can even find a good Russian restaurant, she will approve), decide what you do before and after, ask what she is going to eat prior the waiter coming and order for her, and so on. She wants to feel that she can simply relax and rely on you. That’s what Slavic women seek in a partner.

    5. Pick the bill.

    If you offer to split expenses, this will be the last time you see your Slavic girl. In Russia and Ukraine, men still pay for dates -moreover, a Russian guy would feel insulted if a woman offered to go halves, as if she thought he wasn’t a “real man”.

    If you follow these 5 easy tips, your dates with Slavic ladies will definitely go smoother.

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    Source by Elena Petrova

    Views: 0

  • Reducing the Stress of Being an Entrepreneur

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    Starting and running your own business can be exciting and rewarding, but it can also be very stressful. For most of our almost 40 year marriage my husband has been an entrepreneur and I have sometimes worked with him. Having built my own business as a Stress Reduction Coach I have been reflecting on the stresses of being an entrepreneur.

    Signs and sources of stress

    Some of the signs of stress overload include irritability, anxiety about the sustainability of the business, and/or high business debt. Relationships within the family can suffer if they do not understand the entrepreneurial drive or the time and effort it takes to start and run a business. For women entrepreneurs, the job of running the household and balancing work and home can create enormous stressors. When you work from home, all the household tasks that need to be done can pull you away from your business. People who are drawn to be entrepreneurs are sometimes idea people who don’t like detail and repetitive tasks. Having to work on those things can create stress as well. And when you’re stressed it’s harder to concentrate and focus.

    Organize your environment

    One of the solutions is to reduce the stress and create an environment that discourages stress. Have a place where you can keep everything together and organized. A written plan of action for the business posted where you can see it along with a daily plan can help you focus the time you have available.

    A system that works for me

    I am not a person who comes to organization easily and I have struggled to find a way that works. Daytimers and lists help for a short while, but I have never been able to keep up with them. One thing I have found that works is to have a “big picture overview” of what needs to be done where I can see it. I have a poster board size piece of “static cling” presentation sheet that adheres to my door. It can be easily rolled up and removed if needed. I have several categories that I’ve posted at the top of the sheet, such as “website,” “presentation,” etc. These are written on standard sized post-it notes so they can be easily removed and changed. I brainstorm everything I need to do on small post-it notes. After I brainstorm, I then organize the notes in the appropriate columns. I also have a category that says TODAY for the urgent and important things. I can glance at the poster while I am working and see what else I might need to do and when I finish what I need to do, I can throw the post-it away. If something comes up that is not posted, I can put it on a post-it note and put it where it needs to be.

    This “system” helped me write many graduate papers and I used it when I planned and wrote my dissertation. Now it helps me as I plan and work my business. This is just one technique that helps me reduce the stress of being an entrepreneur.

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    Source by Lorna Minewiser

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  • Top Network Marketing Company – Why Are the Products So Expensive?

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    I’m sure you’ve heard this question before, Why are top network marketing company’s products so expensive?

    This is one of those ever-present questions that networkers and direct sales people will continue to encounter (probably) forever–and there’s always more to it than meets a simple answer.

    One key is not to side-step it. There are good and genuine reasons for legitimate, premium-priced products–and of course there are over-priced ones as well. Honesty is best, as always, and I’ll endeavor to give you the general truth with my answer to the question.

    Special Products at Special Prices

    First, the products available through top network marketing companies sales and distribution model are mostly what are called “specialty” items. They are higher priced products to begin with, having more costly ingredients and more complex designs or formulas; they are simply more expensive to make and package. Some well-known non-network marketed examples are Clinique makeup and fragrance products, Apple computers, iPods and iPhones, Armani clothing, Mercedes and Lexus automobiles.

    Unless you’re dealing with a scheme or a scam, these premium products outperform their cheaper, off-the-shelf counterparts, giving consumers more and better benefits. Since they have greater value, they cost more.

    If these products are being outsourced by the networking company (produced by a “third-party” vendor/supplier), they tend to be manufactured in smaller production runs that do not allow for all the optimal low-cost advantages of buying and making in the high volumes mass-marketers enjoy. The manufacturing processes are more complex and exclusive. The profit margins are higher. This results in a higher quality product with more attention to detail and quality control.

    The reason manufacturers and marketing companies select network marketing and direct sales is because these higher-priced products are of higher quality, and they therefore require special methods of distribution and sales.

    Simply put, they cannot compete with the lower-priced, lower quality “commodity” products, which are sold based mainly on discounted mass-market pricing and brand awareness alone. Think Wal-Mart and Costco.

    Specialty products are “education-intensive.” They need greater explanation; for example, what formula, ingredients and/or processes makes the product more expensive than those mass-market goods available through direct response marketing (such as the Internet and mail-order) or retail chain store sales. Many require demonstration.

    Mass-market products depend on advertising, promotion and merchandising at “point-of-purchase,” all of which are required to get consumers’ attention, let them know the product exists (to create “trial” especially if it’s “brand” new), and to give them enough compelling reasons to purchase and keep on purchasing.

    Going head-to-head with nationally advertised products, many to most of which are heavily discounted and sold at the lowest price possible, is a tough game for just about all smaller businesses to win. Imagine trying to sell vitamins or nutritional beverages or “prestige” cosmetics against a major manufacturer selling through Wal-Mart, or a natural toothpaste against a tube of Crest® through Kroger or Publix supermarkets.

    Specialty products are perfect for the person-to-person, information-rich education, demonstration and service oriented methods of network marketing.

    And that’s where the important second aspect of network marketing’s “higher price” comes in: the added value which you as a “distributor” add to the specialty products you sell.

    Added Value Added

    Network marketing and direct sales representatives add significant value to the product they sell and they are well paid when they do so successfully.

    We reach consumers with the awareness of new products and services that ads and merchandising–no matter how persuasive or promiscuous–would not be able to reach out and touch. And by virtue of our one-on-one, personal relationship with these buyers, we appeal to them with a level of trust and service no mass-market, retail product advertiser could hope to compete with.

    The extraordinary level of service Network Marketers provide is not available when buying through mail order or retail outlets. It is a real and tangible benefit, part of the product’s value–and its price.

    For example: Someone tries a network marketing anti-aging health product. It’s personally presented for them–either in person or via mail–with a host of educational material about the product: scientific studies, article reprints, even books or tapes explaining how the product was made, how to use it, its unique features and its benefits.

    Within one to two days, the network marketer again contacts the person to follow up, asking how they are doing, checking to see that their customer is following use directions properly, make recommendations, etceteras. These service calls continue daily, bi-weekly or weekly until the customer is satisfied and happy.

    The network marketer will also continue to send informative and educational material such as updates from scientific literature. He or she will also let the customer know about other products the company offers that this particular customer with his or her unique needs and wants might also enjoy.

    This is an extraordinary level of service that is a real and tangible benefit for the consumer. This kind of personal and knowledgeable attention is not available when buying through the Internet alone, or mail-order or most all retail outlets. It is one of the things network marketers are paid for and it is part of the product’s value–and its price.

    Are there cases where the above education and service are not offered? Of course.

    Are there products that do not have special ingredients or qualities that support a higher price? Sure.

    And are there times when a network marketed product is simply more expensive to pay for the multiple-level commission structure? Yes.

    Back in the early 1950s, a dog grooming service was opened in New York City to serve people living in the exclusive Park Avenue, 70th and 80th Streets area. They charged $25 to shampoo and clip a dog. They had no customers. Then they jacked-up their prices to $250 per visit–and were an instant success. The Cadillac Seville, when first introduced in test-market showrooms priced at under $10,000, bombed; at $14,000 the very same automobile became an instant best-seller.

    Value is a perception. The relationship between quality, benefit and price, i.e., value, is in the mind of the consumer-beholder. Businesses price goods and services according to what the market will bear. Successful marketers come up with just the right mix of value-benefit-price.

    The majority of network marketing direct sales products are of the genuine higher-quality variety, not available in stores, special in ingredients, design and making.

    Most offer the convenience of in-home or on-line ordering and to-the-door delivery. They are also special in terms of…

    Marketing and Customer Service

    The network marketing “sales person” adds value to the product through his or her education, service and sales to the customer.

    All of this has its price. And according to consumer trends and the explosive growth of network marketing direct sales companies and their products worldwide, more and more people every day think it’s worth it.

    What’s the truth about the price of products offered through network marketing? Are they too high? And if so, why?

    The full answer to this one is complicated. If you need a short one, mine is:

    High? Usually, yes.

    Too high? Sometimes… yes, but generally no.

    So, if they are high, why? Let’s start with looking at what kind of products we’re really talking about here.

    The Truth is, Specialty Products Cost More

    Network marketing is predominantly a “specialty products” business: The products we sell most often tend not to be the type you’d find in supermarkets, drug stores or any other mass merchandiser. They are not the kind that combines the lowest possible price for the least acceptable level of quality. For a conventional retail parallel, look at the products in a natural or health food store, beauty salon, boutique or upscale department store.

    Specialty products cost more to make. The ingredients are unique and high quality and production is low quantity–the amounts manufactured usually are not great enough to take advantage of the economies of scale enjoyed by big-time, high-volume, mass-market producers. So these products more expensive–both to make and to buy.

    Also, specialty product makers usually cannot depend on major advertising to increase sales: they don’t have that kind of money. So they have to use more expensive forms of distribution, such as small, individual retail outlets whose profit margins are higher than mass-market stores and chains.

    Profit Margins and Markups

    Here’s an example: a discount chain drug store might be able to markup a bottle of vitamins that normally sells for $3.00 wholesale for less than the normal 33 percent retail profit margin. And, because they buy in large volumes, they’ll get the product for less than $3.00 to begin with.

    A natural or health food store might buy that same product at the full $3.00 wholesale price, and use a markup of 50 percent to get their full 33.3 percent retail profit margin.

    To the consumer, buying at retail, here’s the difference: $3.99 at the drug store and $4.50 at the health food store.

    And then there’s “what the traffic will bear.”

    There are sexy boxes of imported chocolate that go for $38.00 each, and poly-bags of 50 mini Reeses Peanut Butter Cups you can get for less than $3.80. If your taste tends towards expensive, you’ll generally pay more–in “margin” percentages to middle-people and in total dollars.

    Let’s look at a comparison of one single product offered through the conventional manufacturer-to-retailer distribution system and the exact same product sold through network marketing.

    $$$ From Conventional Manufacturer to Consumer

    We know specialty products cost more to make; again, the ingredients are unique and high quality, and the production is low quantity, so they are simply more expensive.

    Manufacturers speak of “Cost of Goods” (CoG): that’s the figure that a product costs the company to make, including overhead, ingredients, packaging and labeling, sales commissions (such as broker’s fees), etc.

    The very minimum a manufacturer needs to sell that product for is double, or a 50 percent margin. Considering that most competitive businesses operate on a six percent pre-tax profit, that leaves them 44 percent to pay for everything else. So, the $2.00 CoG product they make, they sell for $4.00.

    Now, some manufacturers sell direct to retailers–not many, but a few do, and when they do, they’ll take a higher profit margin to pay for the Cost of Sales (CoS).

    However, most manufacturing companies deal through distributors, who charge for warehousing, shipping and selling the products to retail stores. Normal wholesale is a 25 percent markup, which you get by multiplying the purchase price–plus freight if not included–by 1.33. So, our $4.00 item would be sold by a wholesale-distributor to the retailer for $5.32. (Again, plus or not freight costs which can run 10 to 15 percent additional.)

    To achieve a 33.3 percent profit margin, the retailer has a 50 percent mark-up–or higher. Our $5.32 product ends up on the shelf at $7.98.

    Now, this is the minimum scenario–not what normally happens except in the more strongly competitive markets. It’s not the least bit unusual to find the manufacturer selling that $2.00 CoG product for $5.00 or $6.00… the distributor working on 35 percent instead of 25 percent… and a retailer – especially from a specialty market segment–look for a 50 percent profit (i.e., a 100 percent markup), instead of “only” one third.

    And if all of that were true, the retail price of the product through that sales and distribution system would be more like $14.95.

    $$$ In Network Marketing Direct Sales

    Let’s work this one backwards (because that’s how most of the numbers are figured for your commissions).

    If the networking company’s product sells to consumers for $15.00 it will have an average retail commission to the networker of from 20 percent to 40 percent. So, using a 30 percent retail commission, the company’s “wholesale” price to the mlm distributor will be about $10.50.

    Let’s say that your company pays out a full 50 percent in “downline” or organizational commissions. That means that the company’s lowest from-the-warehouse price for the product would be half of wholesale, or $5.25.

    That’s right in the ballpark for specialty manufacturing, distribution and sales.

    It’s a Question of Value

    There is also a greater value, beyond the “specialty products” issues of ingredient quality, cost of manufacture and so forth and that’s the education, information and service delivered by the person-to-person distribution network.

    Learning the product’s proper use, additional uses, history, all about the ingredients, etceteras, is all part of its value. And products offered through word-of-mouth network marketing have more of this “added value” than any others.

    This last point begs the question:

    “Are products purchased through network marketing higher priced to make up for the compensation or commission payments to distributors and their networks?”

    Can they be? Yes.

    Are they… usually? No and Yes.

    In an authentic, intelligent, sincere and sensible network marketing direct sales company, one that’s well-managed and directed… a company that understands that the financial health and well-being of the men and women in the field MUST lead their mission, decisions, strategy, policies and procedures… no.

    But that new ostentatious corporate headquarters in the prestige location… corporate jet… an army of “distributor service” personnel… rock concert “conventions”… $50,000 “big name” keynote speakers… resort vacations and incentive cruses to exotic locations paid for by the company… luxury car allowances… are all expenses that need to be paid for. Where does that money come from?

    Directly (in terms of potential commissions that will not be paid out to people) or indirectly (in over-priced products and/or inflated charges for marketing materials, self-replicating websites, business building tools and trainings), the money comes from only one place… the men and women in the field.

    “So… do network marketed products cost more?” Sometimes yes and other times no.

    Can they be more expensive than similar items of equal value offered in a conventional market such as a retail store? Yes, they can.

    In fact, you can find numerous examples of both conventionally retailed products and networking products of similar sizes, shapes and qualities at prices that vary by as much as 30 to 40 percent or more.

    The only sure rule in product pricing the world over is, “What the traffic will bear…” No matter what distribution and sales route the product travels. It’s not so much a game of “Let the Buyer Beware,” as it is and always will be…

    “Let the Buyer Be Aware.”

    Factor in the at-home shopping convenience… the customer service… the satisfaction guarantee… personal attention… education and information–and in today’s increasingly competitive global marketplace, the “aggressive pricing” posture being taken by more and more networking companies around the world–along with the generally superior quality of the products available through network marketing and direct sales…

    … and I believe a growing number quality-conscious consumers will agree with me, top network marketing company’s products represent outstanding value.

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    Source by John Milton Fogg

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  • My Wife Is So Sensitive! How to Manage This in a Compassionate Way

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    Feeling as though you’re walking on eggshells in your own home is never a good thing. Although women don’t have the market cornered when it comes to sensitivity, it can be a huge issue for many wives. Living with a woman who is super sensitive leaves a man on edge and can affect the emotional connection he feels with his spouse. Trying to deal with this in an effective and compassionate manner takes some insight, some carefully chosen words and a lot of patience.

    It’s very rare for a woman who is sensitive to only be that way with her husband. Sensitive people tend to carry that trait into every relationship they have including work based ones as well as other family connections. If your wife is just as sensitive with her siblings, her parents or the people she works with, you can take at least some small degree of comfort in that. It doesn’t, however, help you to deal with it in a way that will help your wife manage her sensitivity issues while at the same time ensuring your marriage continues to grow.

    Since you are her life partner you must become the safest person in your wife’s life. You want her to feel as though you’re the one person who truly understands her and isn’t focused on hurting her. To that end you must treat her as the fragile person she is. Simply telling a sensitive person to grow a backbone or to grow up only makes matters worse. People who are sensitive by nature, absorb negative things very deeply so they continually need positive reinforcement.

    Tell your wife on a daily basis how special you believe she is. Give her examples of what you mean. If she’s a considerate and doting mother, tell her you recognize that. If she’s committed to her career and is a perfectionist in that regard, let her know that you deeply admire her drive. If she senses that you are her biggest supporter, she’s going to see you as the shining light of her life.

    It’s incredibly challenging to have any type of productive disagreement with someone who is very sensitive. Even one harsh comment or negative remark can set them into an emotional tailspin. Once that happens nothing is accomplished and the initial conflict becomes more far reaching because feelings are deeply hurt.

    It’s important not to approach your wife if you’re incredibly angry or frustrated. It can be hard to temper what you feel in a moment like that and you may inadvertently say something that will pain her deeply, causing her to retreat into herself. Whatever the conflict is, it will still be there in an hour or two when you’ve had time to cool down a bit and logically think about the best way to initiate a conversation with your wife about it. If you come to a discussion like this with a calm and rational tone, your wife won’t feel too defensive which will help you to solve whatever the problem is.

    You can’t control what anyone else says or does to your wife. Sensitivity is often accompanied with low self esteem issues. It might be commonplace in your marriage for your wife to feel hurt or rejected by others if they criticize her in anyway. Once this happens explain to her that she can’t please everyone but the people who love her most think she’s remarkable. Hearing those words from you, when she’s feeling down, will help her tremendously.

    Love your wife the best way you can and be her supporter at every turn. By being sensitive in your own way to her sensitivity issues you’ll build a stronger and more mutually satisfying marriage. Your wife needs you to understand her so show her that you’re going to do that and more by always being mindful of her feelings.

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    Source by Gillian Reynolds

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