Tag: truth

  • The Real Reason Why Small Businesses Can’t Get Approved for a Loan

    The Real Reason Why Small Businesses Can’t Get Approved for a Loan

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    Oh no, not again. Yes, that’s right, I’m not going to go there… at least not for today. There’s no shortage of excuses and reasons why small businesses can’t get approved for business loans. It never fails to amaze me the coverage this topic gets especially when the national economy goes into recession or when major political races are at stake. Yes, I agree that small business growth and success is the economic back bone of the US and also, that more than 60% of the US workforce are employed by small businesses. But where I get off the group think is when it comes to the lack of financing for a small business with a business loan. In this article, let’s explore the REAL REASON that small business don’t qualify for loans and the truth may even surprise you.

    It’s Deeper Than Statistics

    I love numbers and even better, I love reading financial statements and the notes. The love for numbers did not become a passion for me in the world of small business lending until I came to understand that the financial statements tell the story of a business. Similar to the story behind the financial statements, there’s a story behind the statistics stating that small business owners can’t get approved for loans especially if they’re of a certain ethnic group, gender, and / or industry. I’m not completely washing away the reality that there’s a shred of discrimination in our world… hey, we live in a broken society with broken people. However, a large part of this thinking (small business owners can’t get a loan because of skin color, gender, etc) is just simply untrue. I’ve been on both sides of the fence so to speak in the world of small business lending. I’ve worked for a big bank, and I’ve worked for a not for profit community development financial institution and it’s always the same. The number one reason why small business can’t (and don’t) get approved for loans is due to the considerably large operating risk that exists in these businesses.

    Operating Risk: It All Starts with You

    What does operating risk mean? Well, here’s a question to bring some clarity. What speaks more to sustainability: a business that’s been operating for at least one year or a business that’s still in the owner(s) mind? I’d go with the first option. Operating risk means that you have and continue to execute on your business plan(s) and that the business is cash flow positive (i.e. returning a sustainable profit margin to cover costs and make you money). Here’s the sad truth: not many small businesses get to this point. Most if any, within two years are still trying to figure things out. OK, granted, there are levels to this particularly when you observe the diversity of businesses. However, I’m speaking to the ones that endeavor to obtain a business loan.

    In closing, I offer a couple of ways to minimize your operating risk and increase your chances of getting approved for a loan. (1) Grow tough skin and learn to survive. The game of business is one of survival. Most days, things will not go your way and you just have to stay the course, be adaptable, and stay true to the business mission. (2) Never forget the 3 P’s – Production, Processes, and Personnel. Become efficient in the production of what you offer for sale, create and put in place processes to enhance production efficiency and ultimately the customer experience, and finally, hire, train, and invest in people who share your vision for the business.

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    Source by Pierre Pinkerton

    Views: 1

  • Can I Heal Myself?

    Can I Heal Myself?

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    At the heart of most energy healing modalities is the concept of healing ourselves. Is this what we were built to do, but what our encoding or life experiences would have us forget? Why is it that we can embrace the idea of going to another source for healing; be it with the use of pharmaceuticals or seeing a healthcare provider like a Medical Doctor, Chiropractor, or someone in alternative medicine such as an energy healers, massage therapist, herbalist, nutritionist and so on, yet grasping the idea that the ability to heal has always been within, seems to be a hard concept for our human logical mind to embrace.

    We have all been taught (trained) to call the doctor, our mother, our pastor, our therapist or our rabbi when we are sick in mind, body or spirit. But we seem to forget to call on our inner knowing or what I call our inner healer.

    Recently I had a very bad virus, the kind that lingers for days. While I was awake one night in a full blown war with my body, I began to think about self-healing. What came to me in my feverish/delusional state was that I have been looking at this whole self-healing thing from the wrong perspective. Kind of like from the outside in, instead of the inside out. My thoughts were; if our goal on earth is to remember who we truly are and to experience the lessons that go along with that remembering, what some refer to as an AWAKENING, then the path to do so reside outside of our human body. Enlightenment is the transcendence of our human bodies and the remembrance of our true nature which is light and love. So why is self-healing so important? The question becomes can we embrace the idea that we have everything within our being, not our body to heal and transcend.

    When we say look within, go within or refer to your inner knowing it is not a physical reference. It is a reflection within our knowing of our inherent perfection and magnificence. “Heal Others, Heal Yourself” is the opening of the portal that allows us to see that our body’s inflictions, our negative emotions and our so called disconnection from Source is not the way the truth and the light. When we accept that our physical bodies and our emotional bodies are merely an illusion of this world, something to look past, to transcend from, we begin to see that the healing begins with our connection to Source and our inherent Divinity. When we connect and discover this we begin to transcend the need for our physical bodies to be whole and perfect. Whole and perfect is who we are without the density of our physical and emotional body. This body is only a vehicle to navigate this dimension, to teach the lessons it has for us in this embodiment. “Heal Yourself” is remembering that we are not our body.

    These statements can sometimes lead to a misunderstanding. As if I was telling you to not see a physician, a medium, a pastor, a therapist, etc. for support. This is not at all what I am trying to convey. The lesson here is for us to begin to listen to our inner knowing. I believe that the Reconnective Healing Frequencies connects us to a place where we can allow ourselves to be lead to what is needed. To look within first and ask what is needed. (our inner knowing always knows) Try not to look outside ourselves by asking others what we need. When we know with inner conviction that we need to speak to our physician, medium, pastor, therapist, healer and then we follow that knowing, we now are fully engaged in the process. It is our knowing that will lead us there, now we will have ears and hearts to actually listen to what and how these supporters are guiding us to heal ourselves.

    In Reconnective Healing some will experience a spontaneous physical healing, but ALL will experience a return to balance, by remembering or reconnecting to the “IT” factor which we will name Energy, Light and Information from the Source of pure love.

    I just wrote a lot of fancy words, but most of all what I want you to know, what I want you to hear is attached below! Print this, cut it out, laminate it and put it in your back pocket, just in case life will have you forget who you truly are:

    Who Am I

    The Healer Within

    1. You are made of light… nothing more nothing less
    1. Within that light is energy and information. This energy light and information is who you are in your infinite connection to pure love.
    1. You are not your physical body or emotional body. They are just an illusion of this time and space. The body is something to look past or transcend from, using the lessons the body may bring.
    1. Enlightenment is the transcendence of our human bodies and the remembrance of our true nature which is light and love.
    1. You are love, not made of love, not experiencing love, not sharing love, not looking for love, YOU ARE LOVE.
    1. You are the voice within, the knowing which has no beginning, no end.
    1. You are a divine being, connected to your Source, the IT factor or what I call God.
    1. God is omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent, and omnibenevolent.
    1. The vastness of this Universe and Universes beyond cannot begin to corral the essence which you share with your Source. You are an infinite being connected to all.
    1. ‘Heal Yourself” is remembering that we are not our body. Healing yourself or self-healing is the allowance of your inner knowing to embrace and embody your divine and intrinsic perfection and magnificence.

    The frequencies of Reconnective Healing and Personal Reconnections reconnect you to the remembrance or knowing of these facts or as Ms. Jillian Fleer, Head of Insight and Development at The Reconnection says, the “Veracity” of who you are.

    Are you ready to embrace the VERACITY of who you are? Read Dr. Eric Pearl’s book “The Reconnection, Heal Others, Heal Yourself”, go online and visit The Reconnection web-site or you may want to call me or message me to further this conversation.

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    Source by Virginia Adams

    Views: 1

  • Money Is Actually Important

    Money Is Actually Important

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    “If you think that money is not important, you don’t have any”

    After hearing the panelist make this comment, I immediately looked around the room to see who he just offended. Although I agree with him, I was surprised to hear him make such a strong comment in such a public forum. The truth is, this type of belief makes people without money, and no plans to get it, feel better. I have heard this a thousand times from family and friends when the topic of money comes up.

    I remember growing up and watching the movie “Can’t Buy Me Love” in school. The basic idea of the movie is that an unpopular male high schooler is desperate for approval and pays the lead cheerleader to date him for a month; or to at least make it look as though they are dating. This way he will become popular, which was a guarantee of his happiness. The result was that she starts to fall for him and he does in fact become popular. The popularity however, does not make him happy. In fact, the lesson was that money cannot buy you happiness. He was much happier with his original relationships than he was with the new ones from the “cool crowd”. I was in elementary school when this movie was shown to my class and I still remember it.

    I have always believed that money cannot buy happiness and that I could honestly be fulfilled without it, but I still wanted it and I still pursued it. I focused a huge part of my life to attain it and now, after all the years of hard work and struggle, I am glad I did. I live a very happy and fulfilled life, and money enhances it.

    I relate money to alcohol. Alcohol, when consumed responsibly, can enhance an experience. It can make challenging situations easier and it can bond people together. It can also ruin your life! A difference of course, is that alcohol is much easier to get, but outside of that, there are a lot of similarities. They both are enhancers and they both can be addictive. They both can ease stress, but they both can create stress too. I know rich people that are miserable, and I know rich people that are happy. The money does not create one or the other.

    There was a time as I was trying to create wealth that I lost almost everything financially. I went through an extremely challenging time in my business and my personal financial life. I stopped answering the phone because I knew it was debt collectors on the other end. I learned a great deal with this experience. One thing I know for sure is that I never want to be broke again. Although I believe having money is not a guarantee to happiness, not having money is a guarantee of at least some stress and pain. It is possible to be happy without money, but it is a hell of a lot easier with it. Money is important.

    From my experience, the only sure-fire way to happiness is through solid relationships. These days I spend a lot more energy strengthening relationships with friends and family that make me happy. I also focus on limiting time and energy into relationships that drain me or do not make me happy. This is tough to do, but the results are positive. Over the years in business, my circle of friends has shifted to more supportive and positive people. This happened organically, but now that I am aware of it, I can focus on it. The real estate industry has been good to me in many ways, but the most important is the people that I have met and that I now spend time with. Some of the most generous, supportive, and amazing people in the world are real estate investors. It is helpful to have a little extra cash to have amazing experiences with people I want to be around.

    It is true money alone will not make you happy, but it sure helps. Money is important.

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    Source by Kevin Amolsch

    Views: 1

  • How To Tell If Someone Is An Entrepreneur

    How To Tell If Someone Is An Entrepreneur

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    One thing defines an entrepreneur – constructive action.

    Typically, they’re the salesman – doing *everything* to get people to buy their stuff. We all have the image in our heads; the “wheeler-dealer”, picking any opportunity to try and exploit (and other people) for profit.

    Indeed, the term “entrepreneur” seems to have drifted around the present lexicon – from “something you did” (typically to improve people’s lives) into a blend of “money mad hustler” and “someone who doesn’t ‘follow the rules’”.

    The reality is the modern meaning could not be further from the truth.

    Entrepreneurship isn’t a vocation or job. It’s not a label which you apply to yourself in order to make yourself more endearing to a particular party, or clientele… it’s a way of doing things.

    Many “entrepreneurial” types actually have jobs. They’ll never admit they are “entrepreneurs”, although they exhibit all the traits of one. The question is what these traits are, and whether you – or someone you know – has them.

    What Is An “Entrepeneur”?

    Entrepreneur is a word derived from French – loosely describing a “problem solver”.

    Whilst its connotation has changed over the years, the premise persists – an “entrepreneur” is someone who creates a “widget” and has the ability to encourage other people to buy it.

    What this “widget” is can be a commercial product, service or idea.

    It’s actually interesting… some of the greatest “entrepreneurs” of history actually had nothing to do with money. They were completely focused on the development of a particular “result” and committed themselves whole-heartedly to its realization.

    Whether this meant conquering the Persian empire (Alexander), developing the light bulb (Edison) or creating stable PC systems (Gary Kildall), conquering the Aztec empire (Cortez), the term “entrepreneur” really denotes someone who wants to build something.

    The BIG difference between “original” entrepreneurs and the swathes of new-age idiots (who typically aggrandize a hedonistic lifestyle + seem to have an infatuation for “crypto”) is that the former were typically committed to a single profession, and manage to “leverage” that through the development of increasingly ambitious “projects”.

    These projects could be anything… but they all had a core “reason” to exist. This reason was what drove the originator to pursue the endeavour, and continue even when it was questionable whether it was even “possible” or not. Obviously, the reason we remember them is that they not only discovered it was “possible”, but entirely feasible… hence their success.

    How To Tell If Someone Is One

    The typical sign is they will do strange things…

    • interest in esoteric ideas
    • pursuit of interests not directly correlated to the accumulation of wealth
    • strong displays of passion for particular subjects
    • immersive nature with different ideas (trying to recreate historical events etc)

    The point is that REAL entrepreneurs are not typically concerned about money at all.

    Their primary concern is the creation of a “thing”. What that thing is, is determined by either their character or interests… but in every instance of someone who’s achieved a large amount of success, they were completely and utterly focused on doing “their” thing no matter what.

    This is actually important.

    The modern world seems to have every 18 year old male wanting to be an “entrepreneur” – like it’s a badge of honour or something. If you’re not “growing”, you’re “dying”… right?

    The truth is that our society has become so focused on convenience that the majority of these money-grabbing idiots have absolutely no business even considering themselves “entrepreneurs”.

    They have no experience, no skills and are only latching onto the latest “fad” in order to escape the mediocrity which has come to pervade the West’s consumerist culture.

    Entrepreneurship typically follows YEARS of interest in a particular subject. It typically follows HUGE investments of time & energy into the cultivation of a skill set, experience and “involvement” in a particular space.

    Most importantly – entrepreneurship is about doing something “your way”.

    Stay Clear Of Modern Idiots

    The BIGGEST problem I continually see from the hoards of idiots is they are ALL following a “book” or some other “rules” on “how” to be an entrepreneur.

    I see it all the time… guys reading all the biographies, neural studies, latest books from the big wealthy fat cat – all trying to discover the “secret” to massive success.

    What’s ironic is that all of this stuff just works on the “outside” of the issue – the same people who read all the “stuff” end up with the SAME questions… “what do I sell?”- “how do I know if I’m going to make money on a product?” – “what’s the secret to getting rich?”.

    • If you have to ask “what do I sell”, you’re not an entrepreneur.
    • If you have to listen to what a “successful” person has to say on a subject, you’re not an entrepreneur.
    • If you have to consider all the “rules” put forward by others, you’re not an entrepreneur.

    The point is that the modern world is chock-full of wannabe losers. Even the “successful” ones aren’t actually truly successful – they may have made a bunch of money, but what did they actually achieve? The answer is relatively little (or even nothing).

    The truth is that if you want to “be” an entrepreneur, you have to get to work.

    EVERYBODY has their own work. Some are models. Some are footballers. Some are computer programmers. Some are painters.

    The “trick” is to do ANYTHING in order to get moving forward in an industry; clean the floors if necessary.

    Once you start to gain some progress, the “entrepreneurial” stuff comes from leveraging any progress made within it – either to create & market a product, or to help a market better appreciate the potential of another device/product.

    Traits Of “Real” Entrepreneurs

    • Quiet (or at least reserved)
    • Fully capable of embracing failure (indeed, using it as a spur to change/adapt)
    • Working constantly on different elements within their “industry” (again, everyone has a place)
    • Unafraid of social constructs (just because someone said it doesn’t make it true)
    • Laser focused on what “they” want to do (you want to bring sustainable farming to Africa? This is the type of thing a “real” entrepreneur will actually do)
    • Unafraid to give freely (most “entrepreneur” types are not attached to money at all… typically not having much until they find mercantile success)

    If you haven’t worked it out, the core is purpose.

    The modern world has very little emphasis on purpose; rather it focuses on productivity.

    Nothing wrong with this, but it devoids most people of their passion. It’s good for GDP and McDonald’s – but bad for the creativity lying latent within a large number of people.

    If you want to adopt “entrepreneurial” traits, the key is to become attuned to a particular “purpose” – through which you’re able to invest your entire life.

    If you’re just looking at Ferrari’s and thinking that you “kind of want to become rich” – entrepreneurship is not going to do that. It’s a very difficult road, with only the most persistent and enduring surviving.

    You need to get to work, and only then will you discover hidden opportunities into which you’re able to apply your expertise, experience or network to build something of real value to the world. This real value is then absorbed by the market, who’ll either pay handsomly for it – or reject it. This is pretty-much what determines whether someone could be considered an “entrepreneur” or not.

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    Source by Richard Peck

    Views: 0

  • Have Your Grief Healing Efforts Been Half-Way?

    Have Your Grief Healing Efforts Been Half-Way?

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    Have Your Grief Healing Efforts Been Half-way commitments? Because of your awful grief happening have your self-promises to overcome your unwanted sorrow and loss been only half-hearted?

    “Many important things shouldn’t be done half-way. Think of getting married, having children, starting a business, changing your career. There are times to gather your courage and make the leap, the whole leap.”

    ~ Jonathan Lockwood Huie

    Grief healing is certainly an imperative, essential and important consideration! It is vital to you to recognize half-way actions as simply expressed words that fade into the air and are nothing more than uttered wishes. To stop grieving and start healing, after a horrendous grief experience, requires total commitment of the mind and heart.

    “You can’t cross a chasm in two small jumps.”

    ~ old proverb often attributed to David Lloyd George

    Overcoming your grief chasm is personal and unique requiring essential action steps. Have you clearly defined beneficial steps you will take? Half-measured actions are an unpalatable food-source for healing from your grief and loss.

    Action Steps

    Perhaps because of your awful grief and loss, your what-to-do actions have been like a Beebe rattling around on the floor of a boxcar. It is important that you identify your personal decisive grief healing actions with clarity. Your sorrow and loss need your attention now!

    “Up to a point a man’s life is shaped by environment, heredity, and moments and changes in the world about him. Then there comes a time when it lies within his grasp to shape the clay of his life into the sort of things he wishes to be. Only the weak blame parents, their race, their times, lack of good fortune, or quirks of fate. Everyone has it within his power to say, ‘This I am today; that I will be tomorrow.’” ~ Louis L’Amour

    Early in your grief experience perhaps you have lacked clarity, even experienced confusion, as to actions you should take. In the aftermath of your extreme sorrow and loss you may have taken the shotgun approach rather than pondering and deciding clearly what you wish and should do. Ready-aim-fire-shoot without an identifiable healing plan target purpose is not ever in your best healing interest. Now is the vital time for you to decide. Because your grief experience is unique to you it is essential you decide now the most beneficial actions you will take.

    Commitment Action

    Over the years my life’s happenstances have underscored a vital clarity. I have learned an essential personal truth: As I have experienced failures and successes – professionally, personally and physically – I have learned that until I commit, I am hesitant; there is a chance I will draw back and be ineffective. Nonetheless, the moment I absolutely commit, expectations also move. All sorts of things occur; a stream of assistance and helpful happenings, which I couldn’t have imagined, have come to me. Possibilities and opportunities appear, often unforeseen until I commit to act. Then I experience new personal and spiritual empowerment to develop new habits that support me in new special desired efforts. I am enabled to choose to be willing to grow and evolve professionally, personally, spiritually and physically. This commitment concept has been proven to me time and time again, and so indelibly stamped into my mind, that I believe it is a true principle for individual support and growth.

    After your personal commitment, your life will begin to give beneficial answers to help stop your grieving and start healing. You will receive insight, inspiration and strength far beyond what you imagined.

    What Is Half Success

    Half-way and half-hearted actions result in half success. What is half success? Fifty percent of a forever life condition that can be restored more whole is not what you should accept. You can’t always control life experiences that often permanently change what you hope and dream your life will be. Nonetheless permanent peace, happiness and a life more whole is attainable even if your wholeness is different. Be willing to take the action and make the commitment to seek more happiness and peace. Seek your joy with all your mind and heart. Believe you can obtain lasting hope, peace and wholeness.

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    Source by Duane Marchant

    Views: 0

  • Why Can’t I Forget My Ex Wife? Help for Moving on After Divorce

    Why Can’t I Forget My Ex Wife? Help for Moving on After Divorce

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    It is 3 a.m. Silence echoes inside the empty house. You know you will not meet tomorrow’s deadline for that project at work, but you don’t care. All this seems so trivial. It’s been that way a year now. A veil has been covering your perception, your goals and your aspirations. Only this one phrase keeps repeating itself inside your mind: “Why Can’t I Forget my Ex Wife?” You keep wondering if there was anything you could have done to save this marriage. You cannot understand why you sink deeper and deeper into this vicious circle inside your mind, instead of getting over it. They say time heals, but it does not seem to be happening to you. Time cannot heal, unless you want it to.

    Healing from divorce for men is just as hard as it is for women, maybe even harder. The reason for this is that women express their emotions, but for men it’s not as easy. They suppress their feelings. They struggle to abide by the role imposed to them by society and this always backfires. The pain inside of them accumulates and it multiplies to the point that it becomes unbearable.

    1. Express Yourself

    This is the most important thing you need to do during and long after the divorce. The phrase “men do not cry” couldn’t be far from the truth. Men do cry, but they do so in solitude. Do not struggle to hold back your tears in the company of a dear friend.

    2. Communicate

    Talk about it for hours with your friends and relatives, if you feel the need to.

    3. Avoid By All Means Mutual Contacts

    Whatever you say will be more than likely transferred in a distorted version to your ex-wife and vice versa. This creates a never-ending gossiping circle, which completely destroys a man’s chances to recover after divorce.

    If contact with mutual friends and relatives is inevitable, demand that they do not talk to you about this matter.

    4. Get It Out Of Your System

    A day will come, when you are finally sick and tired of mourning. Gather all the pictures, letters and any other reminders and keep them in a safe place away from your sight. Stop going to places you went together. If you are the one who’s kept the house, move to a new house or even area.

    5. Avoid Rebound Relationships

    Most of the times, these relationships do not work. They slow down a man’s healing process after divorce and they end up hurting even more people.

    6. Take A Trip Alone

    Take a trip on your own to some remote, peaceful place with warm climate and tranquil water for swimming. It will help you relax, realize the beauty that still exists around you and give you the opportunity for introspection. All the pain you’ve gone through will be for nothing, if you do not learn from it.

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    Source by Larry J Milton

    Views: 0

  • Can Emotional Pain Build-Up If Someone Doesn’t Have A Strong Connection With Their Body?

    Can Emotional Pain Build-Up If Someone Doesn’t Have A Strong Connection With Their Body?

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    After someone has experienced loss, they could end up experiencing emotional pain. When it comes to how severe this pain is, it can all depend on who has passed on.

    So, if a family member has passed on, the amount of pain that they are in could be unbearable. Through being in so much pain, one could reach out for the support of family and friends.

    Additional Help

    This might not be enough, though, and one might end up reaching out for professional assistance. Perhaps their friends and their family are unable to be there for them on a regular basis.

    It could be said that this is just part of life as these people are going to have their own responsibilities to deal with. There is also the chance that these people are also in a lot of pain and haven’t always got the energy to be there for them.

    The Sensible Approach

    The main thing here is that one will be embracing how they feel, and this will allow them to gradually embrace life once again. This doesn’t mean that they will ever ‘get over’ what took place; what it means is that they won’t stay stuck in this emotional place forever.

    Additionally, one may also allow themselves to cry when they need to or during certain times. What this will illustrate is that one has a healthy relationship with the emotional part of their being.

    Just One Example

    If this is the case, it is going to be normal for them to embrace how they feel. Therefore, regardless of whether someone passes on, a relationship comes to an end, or something else takes place that has an impact on them, they will go with how they feel.

    It is not going to be an issue for them to cry or to get angry, for instance, which may generally stop too much emotional pain from building-up inside their body. This is going to allow them to operate as whole human being.

    Two Sides

    Of course, there will be times when facing how they feel will be hard, even overwhelming, but it will be worth it. The reason for this is that having a good connection with their feelings will benefit their life in a myriad of ways.

    For one thing, it will give them the ability to form deeper connections with others, and this wouldn’t be possible if they were emotionally disconnected. Also, their feelings will give them the guidance that they need to live a fulfilling.

    A Different Experience

    For someone else, it could be normal for them to deny how they feel after they have experienced loss. It is then not going to matter what kind of loss takes place as they will respond in the same way.

    Through taking this approach, they may believe that the emotional pain they were in has simply disappeared. Yet, although it may seem as though is the case, this couldn’t be further from the truth.

    Disconnected

    In reality, their mind will have lost touch with their body and this part of them will still be carrying their feelings. However, as their point of awareness is generally in their head, this is unlikely to occur to them.

    To maintain the illusion that they have created, it will be vital for them to do what they can to stay out of their body. If this doesn’t take place and they were to get back in there, they would end up being overwhelmed by emotional pain.

    Twp Parts

    Living on the surface of themselves may allow them to be successful when it comes to their career, for instance, but it unlikely that they will be able to experience intimacy or to live a life that is deeply fulfilling. It could also be a real challenge for them to relax and to just be; if they were to settle down, all the pain that is inside them could start to rise up.

    Being on the go just about all of the time, acting like a ‘human doing’ as opposed to a ‘human being’, will be a way for them to avoid themselves. Nonetheless, this kind of behaviour is often seen as a sign that someone is ‘driven’ or has ‘high self-esteem’, so very few people are likely to realise that something isn’t right.

    What’s going on?

    If someone has the tendency to avoid how they feel as an adult and to live in their head, this could be something that has taken place for as long as they can remember. Perhaps, their early years were a time when they didn’t receive the attunement that they needed to develop in the right way.

    As a result of this, leaving their body and getting into their head would have been the only way for them to stop themselves from being overwhelmed. The years will then have passed, but staying out of their body will still be a way for them to stop themselves from being taken out by how they feel.

    A Build-Up

    Their body can then carry the emotional pain that they avoided as a child and it can carry all of the pain that they have avoided as an adult. The longer they avoid themselves in this way, the more pain there will be.

    With this is mind, the sooner that they face this pain the better it will be. Facing this pain is what will allow them to not just look whole on the outside, but to feel whole on the inside.

    ​

    Awareness

    If one can relate to this, and they want to change their life, they will most likely need to reach out for external support. This can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer.

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    Source by Oliver JR Cooper

    Views: 0

  • Why Healing Requires Integrating Our Unconscious Experiences Into The Wholeness Of Our Being

    Why Healing Requires Integrating Our Unconscious Experiences Into The Wholeness Of Our Being

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    Nurture The Deepest Part Of Your Core Nature

    Healing involves integrating our fragmented parts into the entirety of our being. However, the paradox is: we are not broken but merely disassociated from our wholeness. The term healing denotes restoring what is not functioning as it is intended. When we are caught up in the distorted beliefs about ourselves, it leads to separation or what we consider being broken. In fact, it is merely being separated from the completeness of our true nature. Think in terms of a hologram where the whole is contained in every part. This was an idea espoused by the late theoretical physicist David Bohm who believed the universe is a solid and brilliant hologram. He recognized how each part of our physical reality contained information about the whole. Therefore, our thoughts, emotions, soul and physical body are composed of our soul nature.

    How does this idea appeal to you? Are you comfortable knowing whilst you were born whole and pure, through your beliefs, thoughts and experiences it leads to separation? I'm not suggesting it is entirely your fault because we are all bound to experience this. It is said, while our painful experiences are not our fault, healing the pain is our responsibility. Although there's an element of truth to it, we ought to remember there is nothing to heal other than to attend to our unconscious memories in order to return to wholeness. By attending to these aspects, we integrate our known sense of separateness. Release and Renew is a mantra I often repeat in my writing when I discuss healing and emotions. In doing so, we release that which is not conducive to the present moment. Similarly, we renew our commitment to nurture ourselves by connecting with our core emotions. The integration I speak of is an association with our soul nature, which at its essence is pure, whole and knows nothing of separateness or brokenness. It is the egoic mind which disconnects us from our spiritual self to create two identities ie the darkness and the light.

    How To Heal Your Fragmented Parts

    I am drawn to a passage by the South African author Michael Brown, who writes in The Presence Process : "I dropped my use of the word" heal "because of its connotation that something was wrong and had to be fixed. using the word "integrate," which to me meant there was a part of my experience that was unconscious- a part of my experience that I resisted, controlled, and sedated-which was asking to be incorporated into the whole.Whereas healing felt like I was excluding something from my experience, integration felt like I was embracing everything I experienced . " I believe Brown makes two important points here: we mustn't resist nor control the past, but perceive them as the whole of our life's experience. Second, integration means to embrace or at the very least acknowledge everything that happened to us. Perhaps not right away, but when we are ready to make peace with the past.

    What are your thoughts about this? I realize you may have questions related to your personal experiences. Whilst I am not present to answer them, I assure you trying to make sense of them consciously is a healing process rather than an integration process. It is what author Dr. Mario Martinez means when he writes in The MindBody Code: How to Change the Beliefs that Limit Your Health, Longevity, and Success : "The true agents of change are elevated cognitions and exalted emotions. These agents of change provide sustain transformation; in fact, they have triumphed over the greatest infamies and darkest periods in our human journey. " It does little good to dwell on why the past took place as it did. Instead, we ought to turn the tables and consider the following questions as a basis for self-enquiry. Instead of trying to make sense of the past which keeps us trapped replaying painful memories, we identify how the experiences served us.

    1. How can I use the past to facilitate my greater growth?
    2. In what ways can I use my emotional wounds to bring peace and love to the part of me that is pure and whole?
    3. How can I integrate my sense of separateness into the wholeness of my being?
    4. Whom do I need to become and let go of to achieve this inner state?

    Once we can perceive the pain of the past through the lens of: compassion, forgiveness, peace and love we heal our fragmented parts. It may involve deep exploration into ourselves with or without the guidance of a trained therapist. Considering this, I'd like you to spend the following week journaling your answers to the four questions above. Call it a remote coaching session if you like. Write what comes to mind even if it involves images or symbols. Similarly, pay attention to your dreams via the symbols that appear. Note how you feel within the dream and upon waking. Look for messages in your waking life in the form of people, places and situations that cause you unrest. This is your soul guiding you towards integration. Ultimately, to heal ourselves we must be willing to integrate the pain of the past, so healing happens naturally as nature intended it to.

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    Source by Tony Fahkry

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  • Stuffed Emotions Don't Die – They Multiply!

    Stuffed Emotions Don't Die – They Multiply!

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    As I work with clients on a daily basis, I am often amazed at how much fear is involved in showing emotion. Granted some people go the other way and completely out of control with their emotions. However, numerous others are entirely out of touch with how they feel. You can tell a person is in this situation because when you ask them the typical therapist question, "And how did that make you feel?" there will be a long pause. Uhhh …. ummmmm … truly the thought of putting emotion to an event is almost impossible for them.

    This process can be very frustrating when a person's spouse tends to be very in-tune with their emotions. They know exactly how they feel at all times. When an inquiry into what their partner is feeling brings a blank stare, there can be a complete break-down of communication. My common answer to help the aggravated partner understand what's happening inside their loved one's heart is, "when he / she tells you they don't know how they feel they are telling the truth. They truly don't know how they feel."

    Typically, a person who stuffs will respond to any situation requiring emotions in one or two ways. They will give you the one emotion that our culture allows us to show: anger. However, anger is not the real emotion they are feeling. It is just the emotion that we are allowed to express openly. Anger is really about hurt, unmet expectations or other pain. If a stuffer doesn't show you openly expressed anger, they will just push the anger down inside and do what they do so well … stuff it!

    The problem is that stuffing doesn't stop the emotion. Stuffed emotions don't get buried. Truly, stuffed emotions multiply. They become stronger and more powerful. Stuffing emotions over the long haul will eventually cause your body to break down. You can only carry so much emotion on the inside. Pretty soon your internal systems will start responding to the heavy load you are forcing them to carry.

    If you are a stuffer, please know that this information is coming your way via divine providence. It is time to step back and start finding new ways to identify and process your emotions. Emotions don't have to be scary when you learn better ways to get in touch with them. Emotions are just like the light on the dashboard of the car. They serve the purpose of letting you know that "something under the hood" needs looked at. You can take out the fuse so the light doesn't go on, but that doesn't stop the damage to the inside that could possibly happen if you drive on down the road ignoring the warning signal.

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    Source by Trudy Johnson

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  • Why You Have Failed in MLM Marketing Success

    Why You Have Failed in MLM Marketing Success

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    So, you have failed in MLM marketing success. It's a bit cruel to point that out, but nevertheless, facts are facts. You may wonder how you have failed. You may be making your goals and building a replication machine but you have failed. You may not have realized that you have failed. So, the bitter truth is out there and here is how you failed. You chose a bad leadership style that focused on you and not the prospects. Now what can you do? Don't fret changing one style and focus is a challenge but it can be done and here are some guiding steps.

    Changing mindset to serving from being served

    One of the biggest errors for MLM marketing success is having the "I want to be served" attitude. The world doesn't owe you anything. To combat the problematic marketers many companies have switched to "let us serve" attitude and it works. Not only does it cleanse the soul from bad residue, it allows the marketer to define clear and realistic business goals that focus on helping. It allows one to critically think about their ethics and operation in an honest and transparent way.

    Many of us don't like dealing with telemarketers at dinner time, but how many of you are using the same techniques as they are. To open the door for MLM marketing success, we should not interrupt but engage with content that is focused on helping our prospects. Even if it means never seeing a penny from them. That may be frustrating for many of you but money is only one tiny part for success here. Brand loyalists are worth their weight in gold. These fans are powerful resources that could become teammates in the future. It is wise not to lose hope and give up after 3 minutes of failure or so. Treat each relationship like it's the only one you will ever have and see what happens.

    The technical side to your MLM marketing success

    Once you've changed your style and move into the serve first, you can then look into the technical aspect to the marketing. Does your content reek of overly promotional material? Good content does not talk about you. It helps answer problems or provide detailed insight. Are you publishing on a regular schedule or are you over publishing? It's great that you share quotes but where is the practical hands on advice that you could share.

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    Source by David L. Feinstein

    Views: 1