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Tag: Signs

  • Emotional Stress: What Is It And How To Deal With It

    Emotional Stress: What Is It And How To Deal With It

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    Dealing with stress is almost a given for virtually everyone at some point or other. After all, life is made of challenges that test us physically, mentally, and emotionally. However, when a person has to deal with that type of adversity all of the time, the constant strain from such pressure can really affect a person’s mental and physical well-being. This can be to the point where your health can be adversely affected for a short or even long term. This is known as emotional stress. The information below should help you to determine if you are facing this type of anxiety and how to overcome it.

    If you are having trouble with your sleeping habits, whether it’s sleeping more than usual or only sleeping for a few hours and having difficulty going back to sleep, you could be suffering from emotional stress. Often, the cause of this is due to either anxiety or depression, especially if there are no physical reasons for your sleeping issues.

    If you are having extreme changes in your weight over a short period of time, especially if you haven’t changed your eating or exercise routines, you might be suffering from emotional stress. Also, if you constantly think about food or constantly avoid eating, those signs could also be indicators that you are suffering from emotional tension. Depression can also cause a lack of appetite.

    The body will sometimes aid you and others in letting you know that you are suffering from over tension when you have physical ailments that you just cannot explain the cause of. If you’ve undergone a physical, and a physician can’t find anything physically wrong with you, it may be emotional stress that is causing your physical pain.

    Another sure sign that you may be over stressed is if you are always in a bad mood, always showing a short temper toward others, and always getting overly upset over little issues or events. Both your physical and mental health could be at risk, as could the physical and mental health of those around you.

    What can you do if you’re showing the above signs? First, you have to identify and directly address the stressor or stressors that are causing your emotional angst. You should also try to look at the positives of your life and determine whether the stressor(s) you’ve identified are really worth worrying about or not. You may be making those issues larger than you really need to be.

    You also need to take time out for yourself and enjoy fun activities to help relieve your mind of the pressure you are dealing with; no one can go for long periods of time under great duress without it affecting him/her. Also, let your family, friends, and physician know what you are dealing with, so that they can all help you overcome that tension and see the positives in your life.

    Emotional stress can cause a great burden on those who are dealing with it, both in terms of their mental and physical health. They can be more irritable, they have trouble with their sleep patterns, they are less sociable than usual, and they may experience severe weight fluctuations.

    By identifying and realizing what you are suffering from, you can work towards overcoming it with the proper attitude, approach, and help from your family, friends, and physician.

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    Source by Peggy Everson

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  • What Do Wives Do To Get Their Separated Husbands To Come Home?

    What Do Wives Do To Get Their Separated Husbands To Come Home?

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    I sometimes hear from wives who want to know “the secret” that separated wives use to get their husbands to come home. I often hear comments like: “what do those women do to get their separated husbands to willingly come home? They must be doing something that I’m not doing. Because in my mind, I have tried everything but my husband isn’t even remotely interested in returning home.” I heard from a wife who said: “my husband and I separated about the same time as our neighbors separated. My female neighbor and I would often have dinner together and discuss strategies. Well, her husband came home last weekend ready to work things out and mine is still living away from me and is showing no signs that he might return. What did she do that I didn’t? Because when I ask her this, she says she can’t pinpoint anything that she said or did. She said that her husband just seemed ready to come home. What is she doing that I’m not? I need to know how all of these wives get their husbands to come home so that I can do the same things because I miss him and need him here.”

    I could completely understand this wife needing answers. I was separated myself a few years ago and I was absolutely desperate for any answers. I was willing to try absolutely anything to get my husband to come home. And sometimes, I feel as if that were part of the problem. While I was grappling for answers, my desperation got the better of me and I jumped around trying different things and changing behaviors, which eventually just made things worse.

    I think that sometimes, the husband is just ready to come home or he just comes to his own realizations. But I think that other times, there are things that some wives are able to do to nudge their husband to come home a little sooner. Through research, I learned some of these methods which really helped me and I will share some of them with you now.

    Some Wives Plant The Idea That Their Husband Has Something Meaningful To Come Home To: This is common sense, but it is so often missed. In order for your husband to come home, he will often need to believe that his quality of life with you at home is going to be much better than his quality of life without you away. Sometimes, this isn’t very difficult because your husband is having bad experiences or feelings while he is away. But other times, this can be a little more difficult because, even if the husband isn’t completely happy away, he is able to avoid the conflict and the drama of life at home when the future of his marriage is uncertain.

    Coming home sometimes leaves him with an unknown. And since he can’t see into the future, he will often rely on past behavior. If the past leaves you a lot to overcome, then you will have to rebuild the trust and allow him to see how or why things might change when or if he comes home. He must believe that things are going to be better at home not just for the short term or the long term. Sometimes, this takes time and requires you to carefully lay the groundwork.

    You’ll want to be patient, understanding, and easy to approach and talk to. If the two of you argue when you are together (or even argue about his coming home,) then he will understandably have doubts about moving forward and coming home. After all, if you can’t get along now, what is going to change once he comes home?

    Separated Wives Who Nudge Their Husbands Home Will Often Cultivate A Playful New Dynamic Between Them: Many wives whose husbands are eventually lured back will admit that they were able to put their fear aside, at least while their husband was present. They were able to keep things light hearted and positive, even if they didn’t always feel this way deep inside. They did this because they knew that when things went well with their husband, then he was more willing to see or interact with them in the future. They also knew that keeping things light and playful would help to neutralize what was already a stressful situation. They suspected that focusing on fear and uncertainty was only going to make things worse.

    I know first hand that this is sometimes challenging to pull off. Sometimes, you feel anything but upbeat, and you really have to look at the big picture so that you don’t just give into your negative feelings and make things worse. But in the end, it is worth it. As I improved my attitude, our relationship improved. And my husband was more willing to spend time with me. And as he was more willing to spend time with me, I made each encounter count so that things continued to get better and better.

    Successful Wives Don’t Try To Rush Or Push Their Husbands To Come Home Before He’s Truly Ready: Here’s one last important point. When things are going well, it’s extremely easy to be quite tempted to suggest that your husband comes home the second that your situation improves. Sometimes, this is a mistake. It’s often better if you can wait for him to suggest that he is ready to come home. At the very least, make sure that he is enthusiastic and willing before you suggest it. Because, if you suggest it to soon, he may well think that your light hearted and easy going attitude was only meant to get him home. He may worry that once he gives in and comes home, you’re going to drop the act. And this is the last thing you want. You want for him to not only believe that things are going to change and improve, you want that to be the truth so that your marriage not only reconciles, it lasts for the long haul and it makes you both happy.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

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  • Waking the Tiger, Healing Trauma, by Peter A, Levine

    Waking the Tiger, Healing Trauma, by Peter A, Levine

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    Many people who have suffered tremendous emotional trauma (for example, the recently bereaved, people in war-torn countries, those who have been tortured or sexually molested) or physical hurt (e.g. severe neglect, debilitating injuries) recover entirely or near completely from their tragedy. However, others do not fare as well and continue to relive the same horrific experiences of morbid fear, anguish, and anxiety for a prolonged period of time. These latter groups of people have been traumatized by their bad experiences.

    In their book, “Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma,” Levine and Frederick (1997), said that this is a result of bottled-up somatosensory symptoms emanating after trauma. There are three main ways people respond when faced with a traumatic experience, said Levine and Frederick (1997). They can fight (confront the situation), flee (get away from the situation), or freeze (be totally overwhelmed by the predicament to the point of immobility). Victims who apply a fight or flee solution to a traumatic experience fare better in dealing with trauma than people who freeze in response to shock (Levine & Frederick, 1997). This state of suspended animation and paralysis occurs unconsciously and involuntarily. During this state of freeze, the victim has no way of going through all the typical reactions associated with traumatic events (Levine & Frederick, 1997). Because they are not adequately discharged by the victim, the trapped emotions wreak havoc on the traumatized individual.

    The solution to trauma is, therefore, to guide the victim along a path (Experiential Sensation-FELT SENSE) that allows them to perceive and release those trapped emotions (Levine & Frederick, 1997). This approach to healing trauma was garnered by learning how animals recover from traumatic experience (Levine & Frederick 1997). Confronting trauma, said Levine and Frederick (1997), should be mostly on an emotional, limbic brain level, and not solely on the rational, executive brain level.

    Levine and Frederick’s trauma theory is also supported in some ways by the polyvagal theory, which suggests that trauma has a somatic experiential component. If, as indicated by the polyvagal theory and by the Levine and Frederick (1997) theory, that trauma has strong emotional roots, one can apply elements of relationship models such as the DIR model in addressing trauma. After determining the victim’s functional emotional development capacity level, a DIR practitioner can begin to appeal, build and strengthen discovered areas of weaknesses, thus allowing the victim to escape the shackling phenomena of a past traumatic event. Calming the traumatized individual is a tool in the DIR toolbox with which to regulate traumatized individuals. A calmed mind creates an opportunity for further regulation of emotions and understanding of deep-rooted feelings, all of which are needed for trauma victims to extricate themselves from the shackles of the past and begin to attain new heights of functional capacity.

    Other applicable trauma theories include the NARM model, which, focusing on the mind, suggests that trauma is associated with a maladaptation in the victim’s attachment history. The PTSD model suggests that trauma victims are applying to their current problems solutions which had worked and were appropriate in the past.

    In my opinion, while attachment and trauma appear as opposite ends of the same emotional realm, it is apparent that whereas attachment is mostly positive, except, for example, in cases of extreme attachment/dependency, trauma is almost always negative, at least until it resolves. Treatment of trauma requires a dedicated practitioner, who is ready to learn from their victims and understand their challenges in order to develop an appropriate management strategy.

    Recognizing the signs and symptoms of trauma, making timely referrals to a trauma specialist, and integrating several of the modalities mentioned would likely give the best result in the management of traumatized children and adults.

    Reference

    Levine, P. A., & Frederick, A. (1997). Waking the tiger: Healing trauma: The innate capacity to transform overwhelming experiences. Berkeley, CA: North Atlantic Books.

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    Source by Anselm Anyoha

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  • Don’t Ignore These Telltale Signs of Drug Abuse in Teens

    Don’t Ignore These Telltale Signs of Drug Abuse in Teens

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    Drug abuse has for a long been a problem among teenagers with peer pressure as the key factor driving it. Despite being well documented, parents and caregivers tend to ignore the apparent symptoms of drug abuse in the growing children. The early instances of drug abuse evoke far greater health consequences in this age group than in any other group.

    One of the reasons behind the increase in the severity of repercussions of drug abuse is that during adolescence both body and mind are still in the process of development. Apart from the fact that drugs can alter brain chemistry and structure, illicit drug use among teenagers can increase vulnerability to motor crashes and instigate risky sexual behavior. Additionally, drug abuse increases suicidal tendencies, assaults, symptoms of mental health conditions and dropout rate at schools.

    Illicit drug use also entails legal and social consequences, such as increase in incidents of violence, criminal activities and neglect, as well as a higher likelihood of abusing drugs in later life. In addition, pregnant teenage girls who continue engaging in drugs are at risk of harming the fetus and themselves in many ways.

    Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence

    Nurturing and caring for a teenager is no easy task. The bumpy journey of growth that includes a number of transitional phases, ranging from hitting puberty to adolescence, yearning for dependence to realizing independence, “I love you” to “I hate you,” to confronting life without a safety net to making sense of it all, can mislead parents, guardians and caregivers, especially when their children are on drugs.

    Even in the absence of any evidence, it is important that parents who feel that something is wrong with their children trust their hunch and take significant remedial actions, such as talking to their children or seeking professional help.

    One of the most practical tools to address the problem of drug abuse among teenagers is communication. Usually, drug-using teenagers develop traits that assist them in concealing their growing addiction-related practices.

    They also spend their time incommunicado. When a teenager displays odd behavioral patterns, such as not being themselves after a social event, being vague about the details of the movie watched, getting home beyond curfew, avoiding interaction or getting close to their parents, it is best to investigate to safeguard their health and life.

    Some of the below-mentioned warning signs specified by the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) can assist parents in keeping a check on their adolescent children:

    • A change in peer group
    • Carelessness with grooming
    • Poor academic performance
    • Increased absenteeism
    • Loss of interest in favorite activities
    • Changes in eating or sleeping habits
    • Deteriorating relationships with family members and friends

    Although the 2016 Monitoring the Future (MTF) survey of drug use among American teenagers suggests decline in the past year use of illicit drugs, except marijuana, alcohol and drug use amidst teenagers is a major public concern. In addition, there is substantial evidence that drug use in early years increases the likelihood of a teenager developing substance use disorder and the symptoms of mental health conditions in their adulthood. However, early intervention is known to reduce and treat these conditions more successfully compared to those who let the abuse linger or get treated late.

    Pull the plug on drugs

    The earliest warning signs of drug abuse among teenagers are changes in their behavior and mannerism. Usually, addressing a teenager’s drug abuse habits can be an unpleasant ordeal, which is at times riddled with extreme opposition from the patient.

    Therefore, it is important that parents communicate with their adolescent children about the life-threatening consequences of drug abuse. They should also discuss about the ways that can assist in overcoming the challenge of drug abuse. They can guide their children in the right direction through their love and care.

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    Source by Courtney Whetstone

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