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  • How to Deal With the Dilemmas of Gay Dating

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    Unhappy relationships, fights and breakups can mess up your mind and discourage you from dating again. But, one bad relationship doesn’t mean that you are not going to date anyone ever again. Look around, there are men out there who are just like you, and they’ve had breakups and broken hearts too. The moment you find the one who is truly in love with you, it will make you forget all those failed attempts.

    And when you do find a perfect match, many of you might have dilemmas that can break your burgeoning relationship. For this reason, you need to know what those gay dating dilemmas can be and what you can do to avoid them.

    ‘Let go’ of the past

    Every gay man has stories about ‘coming out’, childhood, parents, fear and broken hearts. But don’t let things that happened in the past affect your present or future. It was a thing of the past, so use it as knowledge & wisdom. Give a fresh and healthy start to your new relationship.

    Expensive dates when you are in different income brackets

    The difference in income can become a major cause of breakups. You have a higher income and want to plan expensive dates, and you’re ready to make all the payments. But this can sometimes offend the other person and you don’t even realize. So, you need to keep the other person’s feelings in mind and plan accordingly.

    Be a fearless gay dating guy

    First of all, you need to be yourself, one who is not afraid of dating. Even if you try to show that you are a fearless gay dating guy, if he feels that you are afraid, it means you probably really are. So, get things clear in your mind before you start dating as breaking someone’s heart isn’t good for either of you.

    Express your feelings

    Don’t hide your feelings from the person you love. Express your feelings but if you think you still need to wait for the right time, then do! Sometimes though, there is no right time to express your love, every moment is right, so just open up and don’t leave it too late. Today, a number of online sites offer gay dating tips, so take their help.

    Stop comparing

    You are special, unique, and nobody can compete with you. Stop comparing yourself with your boyfriend’s ex or anyone else as it will lead you nowhere and will just ruin your relationship.

    Communication is key

    Yes, when dating someone, you need to have adequate communication with each other. Whether you prefer to communicate via text, or calls, or in person, make sure that you have healthy conversations with each other. Also, if your mate prefers to talk over a call while you want to communicate via texts, there’s no harm picking up his call, rather than creating unwanted turmoil in a relationship.

    Be honest & open up in a genuine way

    Don’t just presume you’ll be able to be intimate with a new person on your very first date. Take your time, understand each other and then discuss if you can move further in your relationship. Only if the other person is comfortable, go ahead and make love.

    Today’s technologically advanced world helps you find a perfect match sitting at home. A number of online gay dating sites will help you search for a compatible match the easy way. Moreover, these sites sometimes also provide gay dating tips so that you can have a healthy and happy relationship.

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    Source by Sarah Scott

    Views: 0

  • Boho Beach Style

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    Summer is defined by sun, sand and the water. People typically focus on their swimsuits and throw on a t-shirt and a pair of shorts on top and their outfit is brought down a level. It’s time to pay more attention to our bohemian-chic tunics as cover-ups for our bathing suits, making you look more stylish and draw attention as soon as you step out of your house.

    We can start with the basics: a tunic/kimono dress. An oversized poncho in a light shade or a shift/flowy dress lets the breeze right in, keeping you cool. The light shades are good to look for when shopping for oversized clothes, especially with the beach, in order not to drown you in the fabric and to avoid the ruthless sun. Light shades let the light shine through while complementing a nice tan. A yellow brings a happy aura around you while a light pink compliments your skin tone. For those who like to have less fabric, shift dresses are ideal; the shift style still allows for a chill vibe but is a bit more fitted to the body. Any shade of color goes well with boho shift dresses, but the ideal summer colors would be a bright blue or blazing orange, summer is all about bringing more color into your day, in contrast to the winter months. Flowy dresses are my preference, letting my skin breathe but not too baggy, simple and chic. Simply printed bohemian dresses add the extra touch to my outfit: hand painted flowers bordering the neckline and the hem of the dress are enough to finish off the outfit.

    Want to show off some of your new bathing suits while still covering up? Flowy sari pants are the way to go. Flowy pants never go out of style as they make your legs look like they go on for miles. Accent your bathing suit by bringing out the undertones or detailed colors with a complementary colored pant. A rich red pant coordinated with the small red detailing of your top brings out your tan and looks stunning along the water. Want to show your inner yogi? Wear the perfect bottoms that work for the lovers of yoga and the beach. Pants of lightweight recycled silk fabric with a cinched bottom and a bright pattern do amazing things for the transition from morning yoga to a beach day.

    No shirt, no shoes, no service? An embroidered tunic kurti is the perfect throw on dress for lounging around. Kurtis come in a variety of styles depending on your mood. Short white kurtis with colored embroidery continues the summer beach theme from the flowy pants. Vibrant colors give a new look and the white hand embroidered tunics are so comfortable and chill.

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    Source by Era Chandok

    Views: 0

  • My Husband Says That I Am Too High Maintenance

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    Any complaint that causes your husband to disconnect from your marriage, to distance himself from you, or to consider a separation hurts. There is no scenario where this isn’t painful. But I suspect that it can feel a little more painful when the reason for his distance seems personal.

    What I mean by that is that sometimes, a man will be unhappy because of reasons that have to do with him. He may be having a midlife crisis. He may believe that marriage doesn’t suit his ideology. He may be having a personal crisis. I am not saying that these scenarios are not horribly painful. They are. But at least the wife has no reason to blame herself.

    And then there are the scenarios where things do feel personal. These are the instances where your husband is blaming the issues in the marriage on the wife. It could be something that she has done or something about her, about her actions, or about her personality that is the supposed problem.

    Here’s an example. A husband might tell his wife that being with her is “exhausting.” She might explain: “for the past three months or so, I have been noticing my husband acting distant and weird. I confronted him about it right away, but he denied that there was a problem. Then we were at a family gathering this weekend and it was held outside in 90 degree heat. Like everyone else, I said it was hot and wanted to leave after dinner because I felt sick. My husband got angry at me and said he was tired of dealing with my ‘high maintenance personality.’ As we were leaving, he said that being married to me is ‘exhausting’ and that he may want a separation because he can not stand living his life this way anymore. He says that nothing makes me happy and that I can’t just sit back and roll with the punches of life like a normal person. He says that I am spoiled. He says that he feels like he always has to pick up the slack. I admit that I am not as thick skinned as some when it comes to sitting in the heat all day, but that doesn’t make me a bad person. And he knew that when he married me. I told him that I could try to change and he said that people like me never change and that we are just not compatible. He says that I make him ‘feel tired’ and he doesn’t want to feel that way anymore. Where does that leave me? I don’t want to lose my husband. This really hurts my feelings and feels like a personal attack. But I could forgive it and move on if he would give me the chance. The problem is that he does not seem at all receptive to me right now.”

    I understand why you are hurt. These types of issues can feel, and sound, like a criticism. When someone tells you that you are ‘exhausting,’ that phrase makes it seem as if they no longer want to do the work to keep up with you. Of course it hurts.

    Understand The Context In Which The Comments Were Made: I think that your husband’s ‘fatigue’ might be due to the fact that the maintenance issue may have bothered him for a while, but he sat silent and said nothing – even when you asked him what was bothering him. So things built up until they exploded. His silence is not your fault. And things may have been easier now if he had addressed the problem much earlier – before he became so angry that he lashed out at you.

    Know That Context Doesn’t Mean That It Isn’t Time To Take Action: It’s normal to hope that this will blow over. And it may – for now. But any time a husband is uttering words that indicate he is tired of your marriage or thinks that there is a compatibility issue, you want to pay very close attention and you want to take action right away. I say this not to scare you, but from the concerned place of someone who was in a similar situation. I hoped for the problem to pass over, but I ultimately ending up separated. I think that I possibly could have avoided that fate by taking action at the first sign of trouble.

    Moving Forward Quickly: It’s unfortunate that your husband waited so long to share that this issue has been bothering him, but you can’t undo that at this point. What you can do, however, is be careful of what (and who) you are presenting to him moving forward. It doesn’t sound as if he has made definite plans to move out or to pursue a separation, which means that you may have some time to address this.

    Sit back and be really honest with yourself. Which of his concerns have some validity? What is he right about? Is this issue something that other friends and family members have expressed? If so, then there is nothing wrong with addressing it. Sometimes, it takes a painful situation to stimulate growth. If you take this and use it to move you forward so that you grow and improve in some way, then at least the pain will have been for something. At least you can use this as a stimulus to improve your marriage.

    If you are very honest and you find that his words do not have validity, then you may went to dig a little deeper. Sometimes, a husband will project another problem onto to what is obvious or handy. It may not have been the heat or your personality at all during that family gathering. But the situation might have given your husband an easy explanation. Sometimes, a husband can be frustrated and not quite sure why. That’s one more reason why it’s very important to be extremely observant right now – so that you are taking action on the items that are truly at issue.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

    Views: 0

  • My Wife Has No Time for Me! How to Take Control and Change This

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    We’re all well aware that each day only affords us a meagre twenty-four hours. When you factor in the time you spend working, traveling to and back to the office, sleeping, showering and eating, there isn’t a whole lot of time left for anything else. However, when you’re married you really do need to pencil in some time to spend with your spouse. It’s expected and beyond that, it’s crucial for a well balanced, happy and fulfilling partnership. That’s why it’s so alarming if you’re a man who has a wife with a schedule that doesn’t leave any time at all for you. If your wife is so busy that she can’t spend even a few moments with you per day, you need to help her find an opening here and there to connect with you. If you want your marriage to last, this needs to be at the top of your priority list.

    Obviously, you are going to take it personally if your wife has no time for you. Early in your marriage, she made certain that she had time to devote just to you, yes? You two did things together that you likely miss now. Perhaps back then you took something like having a coffee together for granted. Now you’d give just about anything to have an hour alone with her. As much as you may want to blame her lack of interaction with you on her busy schedule, there’s probably an underlying reason why she has excuse after excuse for not spending time with you. In most cases where this happens, it’s because the wife has begun to feel emotionally detached from her husband. Instead of trying to make awkward small talk with him she’d rather avoid him.

    Your wife isn’t about to do anything on her own to change this. If she seems happy enough filling her days with things that keep her from you, it’s you who needs to alter the routine of your marriage. Start by telling your wife that you miss her and wish you two had more time together. Although this may not alter her schedule so that she makes time for you, it lets it be known that you’re not happy with the way things are and your goal is to share more of your life with her. Your statement about wanting to be with her more won’t go unnoticed by her even if she seems to ignore it or brush it aside.

    Many women are devoting a great deal of their time to things that have to do with running the household and being a mom. You’re part of that equation so why not pitch in so your wife has more time for you? You can ask her if there’s anything she’d like you to do but be prepared for her to say there isn’t. Many women have a bit of a control streak running through them and they like to tackle everything they possibly can just because they believe no one else has the ability to do it quite as well as they do. If this sounds like a dictionary description of your wife’s personality, take on some tasks on your own. Jump in and drive the kids to school or make dinner a few times a week. Show your wife that you want to be her domestic partner as well as her life partner. The time you spend doing things around the house or tending to the children will result in more free time for your wife and thus more time for her to be with you.

    A great way to solve the issue of a wife who has no time is to create a scenario in which she has no choice but to spend time with you. This almost sounds like it borders on forcing her to make time for you but don’t view it that way. Plan an evening out for the two of you and take care of all the details right down to arranging child care if necessary. Then surprise your wife with your thoughtful night out. She’ll see the effort you put in as a sign of your desire to be closer to her. It’s a great way to not only have some uninterrupted time with your wife but it will give you a chance to talk with her about what she’s feeling and that will only help when it comes to bridging any emotional distance she may be feeling.

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    Source by Gillian Reynolds

    Views: 0

  • Music Sparks Emotion in a Video Commercial

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    Have you ever tried to watch a video commercial or advertisement without music? If so, there are few things you may have thought: that it was different due to the silence yet you seemed to like it, or you didn’t care for it at all making it easy to go on with your daily activities never giving it a second thought as to what the commercial was even selling. Ninety five percent of the time the latter happens because music is almost a sure-fire way to create emotions and moods in video advertising.

    When it comes to advertisements, music has the power to create better moods in video commercials, as well as to bring a more personal touch to these ads. As a result, it provides a better impact to their target audience, therefore effectively promoting products and services.

    While visuals might be appealing to marketers’ target consumers, the use of music in video media advertising tends to create a more lasting impression in consumers’ minds, providing a great chance for companies to build positive brand or company images.

    Setting the Mood

    Simple video advertisements sometimes could set the proper ambiance when they are without music. Of course, there are some scenes which might be perfectly shot and produced, but music enhances this mood and ambiance in any video media, providing a great complement to these scenes and stamping a long-term impact in the audience’s minds.

    Consider this situation: There is a video of a woman who seems to be standing in the middle of crowd. With the video alone, it doesn’t seem to mean anything. There is also a big chance that people would simply forget it, thinking that it is just some boring video. On the other hand, applying music in this advertisement would set a deeper mood – something that would connect better to the target audience. Slow music in this situation would set the mood of sadness, as if the woman is sadly waiting for somebody. On the other hand, upbeat music would set a more positive and outgoing mood, as if the woman would soon do something funny.

    Suggesting the Right Emotions

    The use of music in video commercials also hints what the audience or the target market should feel when they see these ads. Without music, people are sometimes confused as to how they should react to these ads. Music in video ads makes sure that your desired feelings are conveyed to your audience by suggesting certain emotions. It does not overly push the feeling towards your audience, but it acts as a way to make your audience think about what they should feel as suggested by the music. Music in video media ads, therefore, helps marketers and advertisers to somewhat help tell the target audience which kind of feelings should be felt in these video advertisements.

    Evoking More Intense Emotions

    Simple emotions found in scenes in video ads can be heightened further with the use of music. A scene of a sad woman would even be sadder with the right music, and can evoke more intense emotions to its viewers. Music can greatly affect the effectiveness of these video media ads because they can make the audience relate to a particular emotion or feeling. Affecting people’s emotions through music will make your advertised product, service or company to be related to a particular strong emotion, such as happy, uplifting, energetic or loving.

    Catchy Tunes Tend to Leave Longer Lasting Impressions

    Admit it – once in your life, you might have had some music stuck in your head because it was played in some video advertisement. Months or years later, you still remember that particular product, service or company whenever you hear the music. People tend to link music, brands and companies together, which just shows how effective music can be in video advertisements as compared to using only text or visuals. Video media advertising and commercials with music invest in long-term brand or company images in the consumer’s minds.

    Video advertisements that tend to be the most effective, almost always balance between the use of audio and video. Music can enhance the audio, and it should offset the video to effectively relay the marketers’ desired messages to their particular audiences.

    Some advertisements are better without music, but these are very rare and always depend from case to case. Most of the time, the best advertisements which leave lasting impressions are those with perfect mixtures of audio and video. The next time you watch a video advertisement, consider muting the audio. You will see a different message and effect as compared to watching it with the audio and music.

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    Source by Ann Rountre

    Views: 0

  • My Wife Never Says She Loves Me – Does This Mean That My Marriage Is About to Be Over?

    My Wife Never Says She Loves Me – Does This Mean That My Marriage Is About to Be Over?

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    Are you stuck in a marriage, scratching your head in wonderment, saying my wife never says she loves me?

    If you’re in this position and you’re worried about your marriage going downhill fast, then you really need to pay special attention right now.

    This could mean trouble…

    Should I Panic If My Wife never Says She Loves Me

    Now here’s the thing. This could mean terrible trouble for your marriage, but it could also be absolutely nothing. You may be panicking and your wife just isn’t the type of person who goes around say I love you all the time.

    That does happen.

    However it still means that there’s a lot of room for improvement and it also tells me that your wife doesn’t adore you. You’re not the man that makes her swoon anymore. That’s especially apparent if she USED TO say I love you all the time, and now she’s stopped.

    So you’ve got some work to do either way. You can turn this around.

    Now here’s the thing that must happen first. You must accept responsibility, and take some of the blame that YOU haven’t the things that you could be doing that make a woman…and yes even a wife,..melt when she sees you.

    Most men mistakenly think that this is something that automatically goes away just because you’ve been married for a while. Nothing could be further from the truth. Just think, you’ve had all this time with your wife, so she should be completely and totally obsessed with you at this point if you think about it.

    But don’t worry, because you probably didn’t even realize this was possible. And you’re not alone. I too thought this was the norm. I was happy just to get along with my wife, until I realize that I could make her love me more, become nearly obsessed with me, and well…be completely attracted to me. And you know what that means!

    Here’s what it takes. It takes being the man that your wife truly wants. It means being the type of man that makes women obsessed with them. We’ve all seen them. And usually us guys make the mistake of thinking it’s because of looks, or money, or material things.

    Not even close to true, and I’m sure you can think of example to prove that. I’m sure you can think of those guys who always have women swooning over them and you sit there and think…why? How the heck is the guy doing it?

    The Secret to Making Your Wife Swoon

    Here’s the secret right here in this article, that could absolutely change your married life forever.

    The thing is that your wife must be attracted to you before she can get those fuzzy feelings of obsession for you. And the type of man that she is attracted to, down to her core…down to her DNA…is an alpha man who is (or at least seems to be) in charge.

    A leader is what your wife is looking for. Of course it’s so buried down deep in her DNA that she really doesn’t even get this. She thinks that all of these things that society makes her believe is what she wants, but the proof always shows up when a man starts acting like the alpha male that she really wants. It’s an amazing transformation, and you’ll quickly stop even worrying about having to say my wife never says she loves me because she’ll be showing it in more ways than one.

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    Source by Jason T. Nelson

    Views: 0

  • Transforming Negative Emotions Into Positive Feelings and Actions Part 2

    Transforming Negative Emotions Into Positive Feelings and Actions Part 2

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    Techniques to Release, Overcome and Transform

    1.) Observe yourself having the emotion. Just become aware and watch yourself in the process. This de-fuses it and frees you from an emotional strangle-hold and escalation. It takes will and strong desire to do this and becomes easier with practice.

    2.) Choose an image, a personal symbol, to place in your mind to stop self as soon as you recognize a negative emotion happening. For example, a stop sign, 10 deep breaths, a Danger sign or whatever means ‘stop” to you.

    3.) Consciously lift and move your energy from your solar plexus (stomach) area to your heart. The emotional charge is in the stomach and when you relocate your focus to the heart, you calm down and can see what is best. You’ll become harmless to yourself and others as your center of love is activated and replaces the negative feeling. A better decision can then be made.

    Release the Emotion (A present Feeling or one from the past):

    1.) Stomp, pound a pillow, yell, run, cry; release the emotion from the body.

    2.) Image a shower of light pouring down on you and washing the painful emotion away.

    3.) Pull the plug on the emotion. Image it as a color going down a drain.

    4.) Journal, write your feelings down.

    5.) Art Therapy. Do a simple technique that releases the emotion by taking a sheet of paper and using crayons, markers or pastels to draw/scribble your feelings on the paper. Get them out on the paper; release them. Turn the paper and see this situation differently. Now, draw. A new perspective can harmonize the emotion you’re releasing.

    6.) We release emotions with intention to be rid of them, not to fuel the fire for more. Be sure to release with the desire to be free of them.

    Transforming Negative Emotions:

    1.) Change your energy field. Close your eyes and imagine the emotion as energy around you. What does it look like, what color, shape, form etc. does it take? Now allow it to change and smooth out, becoming transformed, harmonized, peaceful. What does it look and feel like now?

    2.) Change your perspective on the situation. Re-frame it in a way that’s positive/productive for you. Ask yourself, how this situation can help you. What is good about it? How are you growing from it? A positive attitude about something can help resolve it for you, even if it’s a difficult situation. A new mindset can change everything.

    3.) Ask self what the lesson you are learning from this situation is. Knowing the lesson helps transform the negative feeling and take on the mastery of the lesson you are in the process of learning.

    4.) Put a new and positive picture in your mind about the situation that is causing the hurtful emotion. Instead of dwelling on the painful scenario or the trauma incident or being yelled at or treated disrespectfully, replace it with one of yourself healed, happy, successful, determined to move on etc. Whatever feels great and counters the old feeling. Keep the new picture in place whenever the old feeling comes up. The mind and body respond quickly to pictures, so this will shift you fast.

    5.) Inner Listening. Get very quiet and go into the silence within. Allow your inner guide to bring you new insights, wisdom and solutions for healing and transformation.

    6.) Forgiveness means letting go. It doesn’t condone bad behavior, but lets the pain go. You and others have the right to make mistakes and grow. Forgive self if needed and forgive others. This doesn’t mean that you will choose to stay connected with anyone who harms you. It means you let go of the painful movie, get the lesson and move forward. You stop the images and negative emotions from their endless control over you. Restore your self- esteem if you’ve acted poorly and wish the other person well if they have. To clean yourself completely, do a systematic of forgiveness for everyone in your life. You will be rejuvenated. Forgive; let go and say goodbye to these emotions.

    7.) Change a gripe to a goal. If you regularly complain and feel negatively about something or someone, set a goal for yourself and be determined to accomplish it. For example, if you are jealous of someone who has a degree in art; stop it and find a way to get one for yourself. If you are short of money and angry at others who have it, stop it and chart your path, make a plan to increase your income. Things happen first in the mind, so begin to visualize yourself having what you want already now. Feel the joy of it and for 5 minutes several times a day, sit quietly and feel the emotions you would have if it were yours now. Soon you begin to believe you have it. In the Biology of belief, Bruce Lipton offers scientific proof that we get what we believe.

    8.) Thoughts and emotions are intimately connected in fact, inseparable. One leads to the other. What repetitive thoughts do you have that are hurting you? Are you taking charge of your negative thoughts and transforming them? Think the opposite of your negative thought as soon as you catch yourself having it. Correct yourself on a daily basis; over and over. Repetition of the new corrected thought forges a new brain pathway and pattern. Strong intention and follow through is necessary.

    Don’t let your mind wander all day without direction or self-monitoring. You can change your mind at any moment into a more positive state. Letting your thoughts run wild will take away your peace. Take charge of yourself and choose thoughts that will help you.

    9.) What belief about yourself do you want to change? Finances, relationships, self-concept, accomplishment of a specific goal; health, personal qualities etc. Beliefs that limit and cause pain keep your emotions at a painful level, and only you can change that.

    Taking Positive New Action

    1) Set clear boundaries. You decide what you will and won’t accept from people and act on it.

    2) Practice assertive communication with others. Tell them how you feel without blame or judgment; just how you feel. Stand up for self if needed.

    3) Be creative. Create something positive from your experience.

    For example, women who have been abused have set up women’s shelters around the country. People who grew up hungry have started programs to feed poor children.

    All of these techniques work. Practice and practice and you will see yourself and your life become fulfilled and beautiful. Be very patient with yourself, as this is hard work and takes a lot of self- control, intention and discipline. It’s a progressive unfolding of the highest part of self. Over time we blossom!

    Steps in Review:

    1.) Stop and control self.

    2.) Release the emotion

    3.) Transform the emotion

    4.) Take positive new action

    5.) Replace negative emotional reactions with spiritual actions and personal spiritual qualities.

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    Source by Carole Cravath

    Views: 0

  • He Doesn’t Know If He Wants to Marry Me! What This Means for Your Future

    He Doesn’t Know If He Wants to Marry Me! What This Means for Your Future

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    When you’re a woman who has dreamed for years of a romantic proposal and a beautiful white wedding dress, you’re bound to be disappointed when your intended groom has cold feet. One of the most disheartening things any woman can say about the man she loves is, “he doesn’t know if he wants to marry me.” It stings, it frustrates and it makes you second guess the entire relationship. How can he possibly say he utterly adores you and can’t imagine his life without you yet he won’t take any step towards marriage? If your guy seems completely stuck in boyfriend mode and he says he’s unsure about marriage, you really need to address why that is. If you ignore this, with the hope that one day he’ll “come to his senses” and propose, you may find yourself waiting impatiently five or even ten years from now.

    Before you do anything else, ask your man why he doesn’t want to marry you. You must be prepared for any potential answer though. Typically a commitment phobic man will resort to saying that he is scared of the idea of marriage because his parents divorced or he doesn’t feel financially stable yet. Those are valid reasons for any man to be hesitant about a serious step towards commitment. If he confides in you why he doesn’t feel ready yet, you can then work together towards finding a suitable compromise. Maybe you need to talk more about what caused his parents’ divorce so you are both aware of any potential triggers that may make him withdraw after the wedding. Or it may be more of a matter of talking frankly and openly about your mutual finances and how you can both invest in a future wedding.

    If your boyfriend stumbles when it comes to answering questions about why he doesn’t want to get married, you should be concerned. Sadly, the reason some men don’t want to get married is because they don’t feel that their current girlfriend is their ideal partner. You’ll be hard pressed to get your boyfriend to admit that this is the drive behind his desire to stay dating instead of committed, but you can read between the lines to gather the information you need.

    Consider how he views marriage in general. If he seems happy when a friend gets engaged and he’s talking often about how he hopes to be married one day, you need to pay attention to whether your name is ever mentioned as part of that plan. Some men will date one woman until they decide it’s time to look for a life partner. That’s when the break up occurs and just a few months later the man in question is suddenly marrying someone he just met. Most of us know of a couple just like that and typically it’s because either the man or the woman just didn’t see their partner as marriage material so they went looking for someone who was.

    Giving your man an ultimatum about marriage can actually be the undoing of any future that you two may have had, married or not. If you tell him that it’s marriage or the relationship is over, don’t be shocked if he says goodbye. You’re much better off talking to him rationally about how he envisions the future and whether or not he anticipates ever changing his mind about wanting to marry you. If he’s certain that he wants to remain your boyfriend and not your husband for the next several years, you then have an important decision to make. Remember your future happiness is in your own hands, so take all the knowledge you have of your man, weigh it against what you truly want in your life and go from there.

    This is clearly a situation in which you need to place your priorities in order so you can make an informed decision. Emotional circumstances like these can cloud our judgment. It’s hard to know whether marriage is more important than loving him. If you want the ring, the dress and the happily-ever-after future and he won’t budge in his decision to not pursue that, consider where you want your life to be in a year, or five years. The answer of what is best for you is found in looking towards your own future and fulfilling your own personal goals including a healthy, committed marriage with a man who sees the joy in being your better half.

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    Source by Gillian Reynolds

    Views: 0

  • How Art Can Heal You

    How Art Can Heal You

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    A person when they are drawn to an artwork is experiencing either an awakening to the feelings of what they see or they are analysing for details in making sense of things. To express oneself to the creativity of being authentic and original is to experience true happiness as it has for most artists and the everyday people. Today stress has become an expected living condition for most people and many are unaware that they are slowly deteriorating in boiling water like a frog who is unconscious of its environment. The human mind is like an operating system and we store many of our memories and experiences in our subconscious mind therefore never realising that we are repeating a pattern or never understanding why we react a certain way when in fact we wish we dealt with matters differently.

    Since starting on my artistic journey in my living room a few years back I have come to realise that art is more than just a hobby, it can actually be a new way of life and that we are allowed to express our innermost frustration and fears that hang on our shoulders like a shadow of uncertainty. A simple thing like colouring in books and prints are now becoming a new found stress relief and according to researchers who have recognized the healing traits of art for years, say that today art is used to help people in order to express themselves when they’re sentiment and it is too difficult for them to put their emotions into words, most likely when they’re faced with a cancer diagnosis. Now when seeing colours in flowers and plants for inspiration it gives me a feeling of gratitude to what nature is quietly offering us, more than an aid for oxygen supply but a mark for attention in times of stress. The whole idea of meditation is to bring the mind to a focus point where the nerves are trained to not react to the internal dialogues and external forces thus strengthening the frontal cortex from reacting to stimuli and instead take a better course of action. Painting and colouring do for this very reason give you the same result. Observe the traits and characteristics of most painters and artists, you will see that in a general we are calm and are less prone to neurotic outburst of emotions. Some of us do practise a healthier lifestyle and it is a privilege for me as an artist to inform you that we are all not on drugs and substances and that the use of art can in a way be beneficial for anyone who require to relax and unwind.

    A habit once formed is not easy to break however with the right intention to change and move forward you will find that replacing an addiction or substance with a more therapeutic action such as colouring in or painting, it can give you the same feeling of satisfaction. As difficult and impossible this may sound, at first, you will never know until you try it. The secret to becoming a healthier and successful artist is to find what inspires you to create when observing nature and beautiful surroundings but if you have never touched a paint brush then start with the basics of colouring in or make a collage from gluing seashells on a canvas. Either way, art is subjective and my theory is if it makes you feel happy and gives you a sense of achievement from creating something out of nothing then you truly are an artist.

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    Source by Julie Rekha

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