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Created To Bond – Changes That Heal Part II
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Failure To Develop Relationships

Emotional ties have a dramatic effect on our well-being. When one fails to develop relationships or bond with others, it can and often does affect their ability to stave off or recover from a variety of not only physical but also emotional ills. When they learn to attach to and trust others, they begin to develop not only emotionally, but also psychologically. Thus, their ability to bond with others… to become closely knit, often carryover into their home life.

When a child is distressed, he/she may show unusual signs such as increased pulse, increased or labored respiration, helplessness, and hopelessness and may easily become enraged. These signs are often seen when the biological parent remarries and the child tends to believe that he/she must compete with the step-parent for the biological parent’s attention.

When the adoptive or step-parent enters the situation with food, physical contact, compassion and other help, the child learns her parents can meet her needs. The child is then more active and able to respond to stimulation such as playing. When the child is content, she is able to sleep and feel comfortable in her surroundings.

According to Deborah Gray, author of Attaching in Adoption, “attachment is a relationship formed primarily with members of the family and requires more time and interaction to be created. Attachment is what most adoptive parents are referring to when they talk about bonding with their child. Adopted children of all ages may have an attachment to their birth family, even if the relationship was neglectful or abusive. Many adoption experts agree that if a child can form an attachment to birth and foster parents, she will have the skills to attach to her adoptive family as well.”

Signs of Secure Attachment

The parental attachment process can often take weeks or years to fully develop, and in some cases there maybe pervasive attachment disorders for which professional therapy will be required. A strong indicator of whether attachment is taking place is the comfort with which the adoptive or step-parent is able to recognize the child’s needs. It is important to remember that the repetition of parents meeting a child’s needs is the foundation of forming a secure attachment with children of all ages, not just infants.

The attachment bond shapes an infant’s brain

The attachment bond is the term for our first interactive love relationship-the one we had with our primary caregivers, that is, our mothers. The mother-child attachment bond is instrumental in shaping infants brains. This important attachment profoundly influences our self-esteem, our expectations of others, and our ability to attract and maintain successful relationships. So, the success, or failure, of our first love-the attachment bond-has a life-long effect.

Our secure attachment bond shapes our abilities to:
- feel safe
- develop meaningful connections with others
- explore our world
- deal with stress
- balance emotions
- experience comfort and security
- make sense of our lives
- create positive memories and expectations of relationships
Attachment bonds are as unique as we are. Primary caretakers do not have to be perfect. They do not have to always be in agreement with their infants’ emotions, but it helps if they are emotionally available a majority of the time.

We were born with an innate or preprogrammed need to bond with one very significant person-our primary caregiver, usually our mother. Like all infants, you were a small bundle of disjointed emotions-intensely experiencing fear, anger, sadness, and joy, often at the same time. The natural emotional attachment that grew between you and your caregiver was the first interactive relationship of your life, and it depended upon nonverbal communication. Therefore, the bonding you experienced in this relationship determined how you would relate to other people throughout your life. This bonding relationship established the foundation for all verbal and nonverbal communication in your future relationships.

For better or worse, the attachment bond profoundly influences the infant brain. It is a baby’s first love relationship. When the primary caretaker can manage personal stress, calm the infant, communicate through emotion, share joy, and forgive easily, the young child’s nervous system becomes “securely attached.” The strong foundation of a secure attachment bond enables the child to be self-confident, trusting, hopeful, and comfortable in the face of conflict. As an adult, he or she will be flexible, creative, hopeful, and optimistic.

People who fail to establish this type of bonding relationship often experience confusing, frightening, or broken emotional communications during their infancy and often grow into adults who have difficulty understanding their own emotions and the feelings of others. This hampers their ability to establish, build and/or maintain attachments leading to successful relationships.

What is Attachment?

Attachment is the relationship between infants and their primary caregivers-is responsible for:
- shaping the success or failure of future intimate relationships
- the ability to maintain a normal emotional balance
- the ability to enjoy being ourselves and to find satisfaction in being with others
- the ability to successfully rebound from various disappointments, discouragement, and misfortune
Many scientific studies of the brain-and the primary role attachment plays in shaping it-has given us a new basis for understanding why vast numbers of people have great difficulty communicating with the most important individuals in their work and love lives. Once, we could only use guesswork to try and determine why important relationships never evolved, or developed chronic problems, or fell apart. Now, thanks to new insights into brain development, we can understand what it takes to help build and nurture productive and meaningful relationships at home and at work.

What is the attachment bond?

The mother-child bond is the primary force in infant development, according to the attachment bond theory pioneered by English psychiatrist John Bowlby and American psychologist Mary Ainsworth. The theory has gained strength through worldwide scientific studies and the use of brain imaging technology.

The attachment bond theory states that the relationship between infants and primary caretakers is responsible for:
- shaping all of our future relationships
- strengthening or damaging our abilities to focus, be conscious of our feelings, and calm ourselves
- the ability to bounce back from misfortune
Scientific research reveals the infant/adult interactions that result in a successful, secure attachment, where both people are aware of the other’s feelings and emotions is the necessary precursor for successful relationships. These studies also reveal troubled, or insecure attachment, in which the communication of feelings fails thus resulting in an inability to form the bind needed to establish a solid relationship. Researchers found that in order to have successful adult relationships there must exist in us and we must depend on the ability to:
- manage stress
- stay “tuned in” with emotions
- use communicative body language
- be playful in a mutually engaging manner
- be readily forgiving, relinquishing grudges
The same research also found that when an insecure attachment exists some type of abuse may have caused it, but it is just as likely to be caused by isolation or loneliness. These recent discoveries offer a new glimpse into successful love relationships. Taking these observations into account often provides the keys to identifying and repairing a love relationship that is strained or falling apart.

Insecure attachment affects adult relationships

Insecurity can be a significant problem in all of our lives, and it usually takes root when an infant’s attachment bond fails to provide the child with sufficient structure, recognition, understanding, safety, and mutual accord. These insecurities may lead us to:
- Tune out and turn off-Most often, if our parent is unavailable and self-absorbed, we may-as children-get lost in our own inner world, we become introverted, avoiding any close, emotional connections. This often causes us as adults to become physically and emotionally distant in relationships.
- Remain insecure-If we have parents who are inconsistent or intrusive, it’s more than likely that we will become unrealistically anxious and fearful, never knowing what to expect. Then as adults, we may become willingly available one moment and totally rejecting the next.
- Become disorganized, aggressive and angry-When our early needs for emotional closeness and comfort is neglected, or when a parent’s erratic behavior is a source of disorienting terror, emotional problems are sure to follow. As we grow into adults, we may lack the ability to love easily and may unknowingly be insensitive to the needs of our partner.
- Develop slowly-Problems often occur when we fail to develop as rapidly as we should, both emotionally and intellectually. Such developmental delays often manifest themselves in the form of deficits and often result in subsequent physical and mental health problems, and generally lead to social and learning disabilities.
Lessons Learned From Our Attachment Bond

There are many powerful, life-altering lessons we learn from our attachment bond-our first love relationship continues to teach us as adults. The gut-level knowledge we gained from this bond then guides us in improving our adult relationships and making them secure.

Lesson No. 1-All adult relationships depend on nonverbal forms of communication for their success. These nonverbal communication skills are learned in infancy. Newborn infants cannot talk, reason or plan; yet they are equipped to make sure their needs are met. Infants don’t know what they need, they feel what they need, and communicate accordingly. When an infant communicates with a caretaker who understands and meets their physical and emotional needs an attachment takes place and the strength of that attachment influences other relationships later in life.

Lesson No. 2-Relationships in which the parties are tuned in to each other’s emotions are called attuned relationships, and attuned relationships teach us that:
- nonverbal cues deeply impact our love relationships
- as we play it helps us smooth over the turbulent times we endure in love relationships
- inevitable conflicts can build trusting relationships if we approach them without fear or a need to punish or retaliate
When we can recognize knee-jerk memories, perceive expectations, inappropriate attitudes, unfounded assumptions and improper behaviors as problems resulting from insecure attachment bonds, we can squelch their influence and their effect on our adult relationships. That recognition allows us to readily reconstruct the healthy nonverbal communication skills that ultimately produce an attuned attachment and successful relationship.

Becoming an Adult and Relationship Orientation

As we grow into adulthood, for the most part we bring with us the ideas and communication lessons we have learned from the time of our infancy. Whether these are good or bad depends on our ability to not only view life from our perspective but also have the ability and the willingness to see things from the other person’s point of view as well. When we are able to do that, then we are in a more astute position to deal with situations and circumstances that are adverse to us.

As we move through the adolescent stage of life we find ourselves at odds not only with others but also with ourselves. We want to be an adult with all of its rights and privileges sooner that we can become one, yet at the same time we want to abdicate the responsibility that goes with that station in life. It is a time of being able to make your own decisions and taking authority over your own life, but you are not there yet. You must learn to maintain control of your impulsiveness and your inhibitions. You must be able to objectionably reevaluate your beliefs, see your parents and authority figures realistically, recognize and pursue your God-given talents and goals, and be willing to take ultimate responsibility for yourself. Finally you must be able to accept and appreciate people who are different.

This ability helps us to be able to accept the good and the bad because we are able to address situations in a mature manner. When we are able to do this, we place ourselves into a position of strength, resulting in a proper evaluation of ourselves. Thus we are able to overcome some of the most persistent problems we face daily because now we are not only able to see things in black and white but also in the various shades of gray. As such, we are able to make allowances for our and other peoples mistakes.

We at that point come to realize that everything in life doesn’t have to go our way in order for us to be happy. We gain a new perspective on ourselves, others and God as a result of our changed thinking. We are then able to deal with each other with mercy, in grace, with the understanding that we too make mistakes. When we move into the realm of tolerance and forgiveness, we are able to love others without them having to be perfect.

Yet, in order to accomplish the task and responsibility of growing up we must also be willing to take responsibility and be accountable for those things of which we have been put in charge. Those things include our attitude, tongue, and actions. As we continue to grow in stature and wisdom the maturity level of our life should also increase proportionately.

Differences Between Men And Women

From my experience in dealing with women, (my mother, aunts, seven sisters and many friends and associates) I find that the majority of women are generally oriented towards their existing friendship networks whereas men were more interested in meeting new people and finding people who had similar interests — in other words, men would rather enjoy the adventure of reaching out to new people rather than cementing their existing relationships.

These results contribute to the growing research on social capital, networking and highlight the importance of examining specific interactive applications. The importance of distinguishing between strong and weak ties plays a major role in establishing new relationships. Also, it is necessary to consider the importance of taking into account gender differences in social interaction patterns. Whereas, women increase their bonding social capital as a result of using these sites but men do not. Women, on the other hand, show a decrease in bonding social capital with those whom they meet outside of their normal sphere of influence.

The fear of incorporating emotional intimacy into these association/relationships is mainly due to a fear of rejection and engulfment – a fear of losing the other and/or losing yourself. To overcome this obstacle you must be able to establish an inner bond with yourself. Inner Bonding is a transformational process for healing the fear of intimacy related ideas that have been carried from past experiences.

The mental visualization of these experiences often cause us to digress into a self-contained state of emotional security that hinders our ability to openly tolerate the inconsistencies we see in others. As a result, we ourselves are moved to a protective state and therefore unable to deal with the negative feelings that we will invariably experience. This barrier can block us from resolving issues that in reality are non-issues.

The Immaturity In Adolescence

Struggles with adolescent identity and depression usually set in when an adolescent experiences a loss. The most important loss in their lives is the changing relationship between the adolescent and their parents. Adolescents may also experience strife in their relationships with friends. This may be due to the activities their friends take part in, such as smoking, which causes adolescents to feel as though participating in such activities themselves is likely essential to maintaining these friendships. Teen depression can be extremely intense at times because of physical and hormonal changes but emotional instability is part of adolescence. Their changing mind, body and relationships often present themselves as stressful and that change, they assume, is something to be feared.

Your experiences in life help you to mature. The maturity is developed when you know you have no one to blame for the past but the circumstances and your immaturity. Oftentimes your immaturity stopped you from having a proper perspective of the facts facts and seeing things as they were. This made you blame others for your sufferings. You may have created and escalated your suffering without realizing the facts and circumstances and taking a easy way out by holding others responsible for it.

You feel you are always on the receiving end of every wrong or perceived wrong due to your immaturity. However, life has a knack of replaying memories and after few years it recreates the same circumstances but this time puts you on the opposite side (giving end), you are left with no choice but to accept the fact that you were so immature then and have grow-up with years. As you mature, life makes you see your ‘old you’ in somebody else now in these replaying of circumstances and you know that the other person still has to wait years ahead to grow and realize these facts.

Maturity slowly leads to wisdom when you know that it is only you who has to stand up and take responsibility for your past – action / inaction, sufferings / failures instead of holding others responsible. It is truly said that you create your own happiness. By blaming others and holding grudges you keep happiness at bay and give way to hatred and self pity. However, with time and wisdom when you accept the responsibility for your sufferings and embrace all your successes without pride -you are truly happy.

Divorce And Its Affects On Maturity

Children of divorced parents often bitterly vow not to repeat the same mistakes. They want to avoid putting themselves and their own children through the pain that comes from the dissolution of a marriage. But, according to University of Utah researcher Nicholas H. Wolfinger, these children’s aspirations face unfavorable odds. “Growing up in a divorced family greatly increases the chances of ending one’s own marriage, a phenomenon called the divorce cycle or the intergenerational transmission of divorce.” Dr. Wolfinger has spent almost a decade studying the marriages of children from divorced homes in America. These children are more likely to marry during their teenage years, cohabitate and marry someone who is also a child of divorced parents. And they are also one-third less likely to marry if they are over age 20.

“Understanding the Divorce Cycle: The Children of Divorce in Their Own Marriages,” by Wolfinger, published by Cambridge University Press, contains important information for those interested in divorce and its repercussions. “Divorce is an important topic because it has so many consequences for well-being,” writes Wolfinger,

“Its transmission between generations adds a whole new dimension by perpetuating the cycle of divorce. The divorce cycle, in short, can be thought of as a cascade. Ending a marriage starts a cycle that threatens to affect increasing numbers of people over time, a sobering thought in an era when half of all new marriages fail.” His research also suggests that if one spouse comes from divorced parents, the couple may be up to twice as likely to divorce. Spouses who are both children of divorced parents are three times more likely to divorce as couples who both hail from intact families.

Besides observing the marital stability of the offspring of divorced couples, Wolfinger’s book provides another perspective on how parental divorce affects offspring marriage timing, mate selection, cohabitating relationships as well as historical trends in the divorce cycle. Wolfinger also explores the divorce reform movement in America and argues in favor of no-fault divorce laws, arguing that a return to an age of tough divorce laws would recreate the social conditions that used to make divorce harder on children.

It is my opinion considering all that has been written on this subject that one reason children from divorced families get divorced more often is because they have a tendency to marry as teenagers. Social history demonstrates that the older you are when you marry, the less likely you are to get divorced. It’s good advice for everyone.”

On the other hand, the more transitions children experience while growing up, the more they will experience as adults. Taking this into consideration, the question that needs to be asked is, “What is the hardest for kids is how many disruptions they experience — the up-and-down cycles.

This is a valid question because many children will have stepparents, and some will see their new families dissolve. This type of disruption occurs any time they lose a parent — except from death. That’s different, and doesn’t have the same negative effects on children… whereas divorce is ambiguous. Children wonder whether the divorce was their fault or who is to blame. And they wonder ‘Is he coming back?’” It is certainly good news that people are less likely to stay in high conflict marriages than they used to. However, “ending a low-conflict marriage may hurt children as much as staying in a high-conflict family,” and the odds of divorce transmission are actually highest if parents dissolve a marriage after little or no conflict. It therefore behooves us to evaluate the effects divorce will have upon our children and their emotional well being should we decide to travel that road.

But before making that decision, we should honestly examine ourselves and the motivating things that are moving us in that direction. This inventory, if prayerfully done will allow us to see the other persons point of view more clearly and thereby make the necessary adjustments, where warranted, to resolve the issues that precipitated situation to begin with. If we are truly willing to continue the relationship, then we must take the necessary steps needed to resolve the issues of what is good or bad by first considering what we could have done to alleviate the problem rather than casting blame. When we allow the power of forgiveness to flow in us we cannot only deal with the past and present, but also the future as bonds are cemented.

Gray, Deborah. Attaching in Adoption: Practical Tools for Today’s Parents. Indiana:Perspectives Press Inc., 2002.

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Source by Franklyn T. Johnson, Ph.D

Views: 0
February 3, 2020
Personal or Team Accountability In Multi-Level Marketing – Which Is More Important?

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Personal and Team Accountability Are Both Keys to MLM Success

You’ve started your own network marketing business. You’ve teamed with a great company who has products you believe in, you’ve made your time commitment, and you start to generate interest in your business. You’re enthusiastic, you sell some product, maybe even add a few people to your downline. It seems you’re putting a lot of effort into your new business. But after a couple of months, you think “why am I getting nowhere fast?”

The vast majority of those who start an MLM business fail – historically as many as 95%. Some lose their investment entirely, some break even, some even make a little money.

There are a number of reasons why.

Many MLM’ers may not succeed because they don’t pay attention to a key component of their business. Accountability.

Webster’s defines “accountability” as “an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions”, “to be accountable or answerable”.

You may think – “It’s my own business, I’m independent, who do I need to be accountable to?” The answer is you.

The Importance of Personal Accountability

Many of us have used day planners, call logs, activity reports, and all manner of reports to track and manage our day, and report to our bosses who we have seen, what we sold and what we accomplished every day or week. Wouldn’t that be a good idea for you and your business?

Daily goals and visualization go a long way to creating a thriving business. What’s really needed is a format to track this information. Some of you may have trackers for your business. Do they incorporate your goals? Do they help you have a clear picture of your business? Are they simple and easy to use? If not, look for one that fits your needs, and use it religiously.

Team Accountability Is Just As Important

Multi-level marketing, along with practically any other business, functions best if the drivers and the followers all know where the team is going. Communication among team members is crucial. Communicating to your downline is just as important – just letting them know you are there to help them in any way possible can be motivating. Remember, if your downline succeeds, you succeed.

Personal and Team Accountability – can they work for you? Absolutely. Be dedicated, work hard and be accountable. Do it, and be amazed at the results!

For more about Accountability, and a free Accountability Tracker, go here.

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Source by Horace Calvert

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February 3, 2020
Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? A Review of My Millionaire Mentor

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My Millionaire Mentor Review

Who wants to be a millionaire? Everyone! And yes, this opportunity promises to make you one in a matter of months. But hey, don’t we know that if there is something that sounds too good to be true, it is likely to be not true? Whenever we see any opportunity that promises a lot of money very fast, and with minimal efforts, it is natural to feel a little skeptical about it. There are thousands of such scams on the internet which claim to let you into a secret which will make you a millionaire in a matter of months. But eventually, you just end up spending your precious time and your hopes are dashed when time passes by and you make no money at all.

However, My Millionaire Mentor seems to be slightly different from all those false promises that are strewn around the internet. So let’s try and figure out whether this is actually a good opportunity or yet another internet money making scam.

What is My Millionaire Mentor?

My Millionaire Mentor is Ryan Matthew’s personal website where he offers to train fifty internet newbies and teach them a six step secret which will make them earn anything from $1000 to $5000 per day. Wow! That’s a lot of money, right? But what does one have to do in order to earn this kind of money? That is precisely what millionaire Ryan Matthews wants to teach you.

He is going to personally coach the first fifty people who sign up for this program, and he promises to let them in on the secret which has made him earn around $11 million in just two years. He adds that in order to make that whopping amount of money, he had to work for only an hour per day! When you see his San Diego beach house and his neat set of supercars, it seems like a fantasy. And when he promises that you can have all of that, it seems to be an even more unlikely proposition.

Ryan Matthews also adds that this process is completely risk free, and does not involve going to your friends and family to sell a particular product. He makes it very clear in his promotional video that you will not be a salesperson of any kind. Moreover, he guarantees that there is no way that you can lose money by participating in this program. So what is this program all about? Read on to find out more.

Is My Millionaire Mentor A Good Opportunity?

In the promotional video for the company, we find people from different walks of life thanking Ryan Matthews for completely transforming their lives. One instantly identifies with those people. All of us have debts and mortgages that we struggle to pay, even though some of us work on two jobs. We spend all our days working hard to pay off our debts, while the best times of our lives just pass us by. Who wouldn’t want to spend more time with their kids rather than working in office on a Saturday night? Moreover, there are so many other financial pressures that we have on our shoulders – like college funds, home loans, health worries – that we hardly find time to follow our dreams and live our lives to the fullest.

Thus, when an opportunity like My Millionaire Mentor comes to us, it is absolutely alluring. But the thing is, the internet is full of many financial scams which claim to transform your lives, but end up taking money from you. All of us have been disappointed many times through various such programs that claim to make us millionaires but end up taking our own hard earned money.

So we need to be very careful before getting into any such program which offers easy money. My Millionaire Mentor states it very clearly that it is a scheme which has long term returns. On the plus side, that means that your grandchildren can enjoy the fruits of your labor. However, on the other hand, it means that it will take some time before you can earn some real money for yourself.

How Does My Millionaire Mentor Work?

It is clear from the promotional video on the website that the product is basically a free traffic source that you will get unlimited access to if you become a member of this program. The other benefits include special coaching by Ryan Matthews over the phone. He will personally mentor you on how to best use his product and maximize the profits for yourself. Once you become a member of what Matthews calls a secret millionaire club, you will have access to the various tips and tricks that will help you to make money. It is also mentioned in the video that the way in which you will make money is 100% legal, moral and ethical.

So once you have access to the free traffic source, you will get clients who will pay you $1000 to $5000 a day for sending them traffic over the internet. Internet traffic is basically all the clicks that lead people to different website. According to Ryan Matthews, he has access to clients who are ready to pay that much amount of money for access to your traffic. In effect, you will be an internet traffic broker who will work with millionaire Ryan Matthews to coordinate internet traffic and redirect it to your clients.

Basically, it is an opportunity where you will be doing affiliate marketing. Affiliate marketing is an actual money making source on the web where you get paid for traffic that you send to your client’s website. And if you have access to a good traffic source which you can turn on or off at will, it is possible that you will make a lot of money online.

There are six steps to making this work – but that is classified information which you will get access to once you become a part of this program.

How Can You Make the First $500 Through My Millionaire Mentor?

In the promotional video, Matthews promises you that once you become one of the private members of the My Millionaire Mentor program, you will earn $500 and much more in the first month. In fact, you can around $5000 a day, without even leaving the comfort of your home. And to top it all, you just need a computer with an internet connection to do this job.

In order to become a private member, the entry fee is $1000. But in effect, you pay only $49 because you are refunded $500 immediately. You get your money back immediately, and Ryan Matthews guarantees that you don’t have to spend a penny more than $49 to get into this program.

Matthews also tells that by becoming a private member, you will get to be a part of a highly regarded company that is going to be the next big billion dollar internet empire in times to come. Though it is a speculation, in the internet age, anything is possible.

The process which Ryan Matthews is going to teach you is actually a very simple process which many people have used on the internet in order to make money. It is called affiliate marketing. Affiliate marketing is basically a process through which you send traffic to the websites of your clients. And for each click that leads a person to your client’s website from your source, you get paid a certain amount as commission. And if you have access to a source from where you can send millions of clicks to your clients, you will seriously earn a lot of money online. So, technically, My Millionaire Mentor is a concept that could actually earn if you serious money if Ryan Matthews actually handed out a free traffic source to you.

Pros and Cons of My Millionaire Mentor

It is evident that this is a program which appears to have some sort of risk. But then, that is life. There are certain risks that one has to take, especially if you want to be a millionaire.

Technically, Ryan Matthews is asking for just $49 from you for getting access to a private group where you will be coached on the secrets of making money on the internet. This scheme does not have an MLM structure, and you need not sell anything. It is absolutely legal, and all you have to do is broker internet traffic.

Moreover, once you sign up, you get an immediate return of $500, which is a very good proposition. If you really get that money, it is a fantastic deal. Especially since you could go on to make more money in following months.

One of the cons of this entire program is that by watching the promotional video, you get to know very little about the process. There are many things which are not spelled out clearly, which makes it difficult to take the plunge and actually subscribe to the scheme and be a part of the millionaire mentor club.

However, the testimonials from the various people who have tried this out spells out that there are people out there who are making money from this program. And that is exactly what makes you want to go ahead and try it.

Another con of this program is that earning money through affiliate marketing can sometimes be a very slow process. But this is something that Matthews tells you in the promotional video itself. It is a long term investment plan whereby you will take some time to earn money.

But on the other hand, Ryan Matthews is also promising to let you on into a secret six-step process which will make the money making process much faster. So once become a part of the secret millionaire club and get to know the secret process which gives you access to more traffic, you might be able to make serious money online. And the success stories that are shared in the promotional video clearly say that people are making money quite fast. In fact, one woman said that she made more money through My Millionaire Mentor in two months than she had made in two years.

Now, that is something!

The biggest minus of this entire project is previous experience. Whenever we hear about something that promises to give us a lot of money without working hard, it raises our suspicions. Also, there are thousands of scams on the internet which make a fool of people who do not have sufficient knowledge about the topic and subscribe to various programs hoping to make money. In the end, they realize that all of it was a scam.

Conclusion

The good thing about My Millionaire Mentor is that you get to see people for whom this process has worked, and that tends to give you some courage to go ahead and take the plunge. What you need to do is hear Ryan Matthews for yourself. Go to his website and have a look at his promotional video. If you feel that what he is saying is worth giving a try, you can go ahead and become a private member of the millionaire club. It is a conscious decision that you need to take for yourself, now that you already know the pros and cons of the program.

If you think that this is yet another money-making scam on the internet, don’t sign up for it. However, if you think that this program really has the potential to completely turn your life around, go ahead and become one of the protégés of Ryan Matthews. After all, every one of us dreams of having a Lamborghini parked at our garage, and a wonderful, spacious home from where we can see the sunset with our loved ones. There are some dreams that can be fulfilled when you become a millionaire, and if you are a person who nurses such dreams, you might want to try out My Millionaire Mentor to see what’s in store for you.

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Source by David Morgan

Views: 0

February 3, 2020
How Drug Detox Can Help Improve Relationships
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Alcohol and drug abuse is the root cause of many problems in an individual’s life. From developing severe mental health issues and physical troubles to encountering serious challenges in one’s relationships, abuse of illegal substances is linked with innumerable adverse effects.

It is a widely known fact that long-term, committed relationships and substance abuse do not go together. Having a partner who is engaged in drinking or abusing drugs can be an insurmountable challenge, with the negative effects rippling and influencing all the near and dear ones. In worst cases, substance abuse problem can take a heavy toll by causing an emotional distance between the partners, which eventually results in frequent fights and violence at home.

Sadly, a person fighting substance abuse is deprived of the emotional connect with his or her partner resulting in the loss of trust and affection. Overall, such couples have a tough time dealing with this downward spiral, wherein a person drinks or uses drugs to reduce tension arising out of frequent conflicts, and vice versa.

Substance abuse and impact on relationships

A person abusing drugs is very likely to have a poor sex drive and may fail to maintain a healthy sexual relationship. This is because when someone is addicted to any substance, there is no room left for anything else. Some of the telltale signs that the substance abuse problem is negatively affecting one’s relationships are:
- Not taking care of responsibilities or staying out late.
- Rising instances of domestic violence.
- Isolating from friends and relatives to hide the drug or alcohol problem.
- Experiencing financial problems.
When it comes to intimate relationships, believing that one can prevent problems by avoiding sexual relationships post sobriety is incorrect. A complete recovery is possible only when a person gets enough love and care from his or her partner. Since intimate relationships are considered one of the most rewarding parts of human existence, a lack of it can leave people feeling unwanted and incomplete.

For a person recovering from an addiction, lack of sexual relationships might lead him or her to revisit the places that had triggered drug or alcohol abuse.

How detox can be helpful in restoring relationships

When a person fighting substance abuse enters a detox program, he or she needs to work harder to recover from the addiction and regain his or her ability to enjoy fruitful relationships with the loved ones. While undergoing treatment, it is important for a person to not just focus on maintaining sobriety but also reshape his or her habits and old attitudes that could act as a barrier to his or her interpersonal or intimate relationships.

While detoxification might pave the way for a person’s recover from an addiction, it is important to ensure that it also brings back his or her sexual drive. With low self-esteem and confidence, it becomes difficult for the recovering individual to even think about any personal relationship. Undergoing a detox program can be a great help in gaining enough confidence to deal with relationship problems.

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Source by Barbara Odozi

Views: 0
February 2, 2020
MLM – In Unashamed Defense of Multi-Level and Network Marketing

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One of the things that tells you are being successful in your online marketing efforts is an increasing number of emails from nay sayers, spoilers and people who are just down right rude.

I recently received one from an IT expert who was independently well off thanks to stock options and profit sharing. He mocked MLM people as “bottom feeders” and said, “I mock MLM as a business model.” Probably very easy to do when you’re loaded thanks to stock options, etc – just hope his company doesn’t go the way of Enron!

To be honest I mock most other business models as an inefficient and sometimes down right unethical way to do business. Example one:- Small family in china produces components for a larger company for a tiny margin, large company then sells products to a wholesaler, wholesale then sells it to a foreign wholesaler who then sells it to a retailer who sells it to the consumer. Now this is a basic model – sometimes the middle men can be much more numerous. Either way the original producer gets screwed and the consumer gets screwed thanks to the number of middle man. This is even worse in the agricultural industry. Go to a farmer and ask him how much he/she gets for a liter of milk, a ton of potatoes, etc – it will shock you! They get a pittance of the final shelf price. For farmers to continue to rely on the big multinationals to do the right thing by them is the seriously flawed business model as they continue to be driven to the wall. I MOCK TRADITIONAL BUSINESS MODELS.

The worlds biggest MLM is the international illegal drug market – although they trade in evil and death they are a huge network of people from poppy fields in Afghanistan to street sellers in western cities – the high estimate is that the world wide industry is $500 billion. The a lot of money for what is an MLM. Should MLM still be mocked as a business model?!

Multi-level marketing and network marketing is found throughout the business world. Real Estate agents, Dealerships, and many other ‘traditional’ business often have levels of reward depending on number of sales, sales people below you, etc. The internet abound with affiliate programs that are multi-leveled to reward affiliates not only for product sales, but also if they bring in new affiliates.

Why is MLM so hated by the traditionalists? One it represents a threat. It means a load more competitors. It puts products profits into the hands of the consumers. It means less sales bonuses for them and less margins for the middle men. It means the wealthy can lose control of markets that they previously dominated. Who would you be more scared of – another multi-national with a sales team of 100 people, or a MLM with 100,000 non-professional sales people? Genuine people power has always frightened those in control of both the power and the purse strings. Why would you give the profits to the consumer instead of the share holders? Of course it rattles their cage – it threatens their very existence. Instead of a CEO earning millions for doing nothing, he/she would actually have to get out there and prove that they could sell a product to be successful. Hugely frightened for someone relying on their degrees and old tie network to get ahead.

Multi-level marketing and network marketing is also hated by the traditionalist because it frees people from slavery to a forty hour working week. They love people to be in credit card debt. They love people to HAVE to go to work to survive. They love people having big mortgages. They love people being CONSUMERS. They don’t want consumers to turn into producers. It spoils there party. They don’t want people to be free to from the “traditional” working (slavery) model.

At the end of the day it doesn’t matter what the naysayers say about MLM, the only thing that matters is can you succeed at MLM.

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Source by Alastair Harris

Views: 0

February 2, 2020
10 Ways to Make Money With Body Painting

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Are you considering making a living (or at least a little money on the side) doing body painting? Is it even possible to make a living doing body painting? Yes, you can make good money as a ‘pro’ body painter, and even kids as young as twelve have made good money (like $500-$400 in an afternoon) doing simple painting techniques like airbrushed temporary tattoos at fairs and festivals.

It may be difficult to believe that there are so many different ways to make money doing body painting. I know that when I first discovered the art of body painting, I thought maybe you could make some temporary money at a party or fair. But there are many, many more possibilities, as you will see.

Here are just 10 of the ways you could get paid to do body painting:

1. Doing body painting at parties. You could hire yourself for a night or a day and get paid either by the hour or a flat fee for the event.

2. Painting party-goers before they go to a party or event. Themed or holiday parties would be a good opportunity for this. Make sure you mention that you could body paint their friends, too!

3. As a professional body painter for the theatre. You could do one show for a discount to get in the door and get some recognition, if you don’t have a track record yet.

4. Travel with the circus as their ‘in house’ makeup artist.

5. Become the official body painter for a dance company. Again, you could work for a low fee or even free to get in the door.

6. Face painting alone opens up several opportunities: parties, festivals, fairs, and special events all are possible places for you to set up shop. Just make sure (as with all these options) that you are using proper, non-allergenic paints meant for face painting alone.

7. Special events like graduations, celebrations, fundraisers, and reunions.

8. Sports events: painting fans in their team colors and symbols has had a long tradition.

9. Festivals around the world. There are several festivals specifically for body painting around the world, but there are many more that would be a great place for body painting. Look up the festivals in your area and find out how to become a vendor and what their requirements and rules are.

10. Teach others how to do body painting. You could hold a one-time workshop, give ongoing group classes or even do an online body painting course (as I am doing).

I hope this gives you some good ideas about how you could make money as a body painting artist. Maybe you have even thought of some ways that I didn’t include…great! Choose one method, research what you need to do to get started, and go for it!

Bonus Tip:

Here’s a secret hint…as you are considering one of the possibilities above. Don’t choose what you think would make you the most money…choose what you think you would happiest and best at doing. You will always make more doing something you love doing, in the long run!

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Source by Jodina Meehan

Views: 0

February 2, 2020
Can You Treat Trichotillomania With Holistic Medicine?

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Trichotillomania is an impulse control or brain disease similar to OCD or addiction where the person pulls out their own hair. The hair can be located anywhere. Trichotillamania may be caused by trauma, rape, physical violence, torture, child abuse, and very severe emotional abuse. It may be minor and easily managed or severe. This disease can overwhelm the person. It is very important for the person with this disease to eliminate or minimize exposure to any severely negative people in their life that are abusive or exploitative. It is an emotional disorder that usually needs several therapies in order to be managed successfully. There are many alternative therapies which are untried for this illness, but these may successful due to the large emotional component of the illness. Trichotillomania seems similar to addiction, OCD, and a bad habit. Quieting the mind should be one of the goals of any therapy. Alternative therapies that quiet the mind include Yoga, scalp acupuncture, auricular acupuncture, Emotional Freedom Technique(EFT), botanical extracts, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS),and orthomolecular medicine.

This person must be evaluated by a medical professional. A full physical and diagnostic testing of hormones and neurotransmitters must occur. This patient must be evaluated for AIDS and a brain tumor. There are several diseases that are severe enough to result in very irregular symptoms. It is extremely important to be very aggressive in treating this disease. Amino acids therapy for this may be useful and could include 5-HTP, theanine, GABA, and phenylalanine. Chinese herbal patent formulas may be considered along with Chinese liquid herbal extracts. Scalp acupuncture may be very successful in treating this type of illness. It should be done with larger needles for this type of disease. Scalp acupuncture treatments last about thirty minutes to one hour. It may take nine treatments in order to see results. Laser therapy using a cold medical grade laser may work well on this patient. You may need several sessions of cold medical grade laser therapy before you see a significant change.

It is important for this person to sleep well and eat a well balanced diet without nitrates, amines, and food dyes. This person should avoid genetically modified foods, food additives, MSG, tumeric, and drink plenty of pure water to stay fully hydrated. The diet should allow Swiss method decaffeinated coffee or organic coffee and tea. This person should consider trying the Rotation Diet where each food may be eaten once during a four-day period. It is also a good idea to identify and reduce exposure to all allergens. You may want to consider some form of allergy treatment. Convention allergy treatments with shots is one alternative. NAET is a non-painful alternative that incorporates chiropractic and acupuncture with a special diet to treat allergens. This person needs consider a form of regular exercise like the walking, gym, biking, Bikram yoga, hiking, and dancing.

©Dr R Stone, MD-India

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Source by R Stone

Views: 0

February 2, 2020
Giving a Great "Walk Around" Sales Presentation

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Salespeople should know that a walk around isn’t just a presentation, it is a chance to discover the customer’s needs and turn your product or services features into a benefit for that customer.

Learning good selling techniques takes practice and learning how to give a “walk around” sales presentation is essential to the sales process.

An excellent walk around presentation is not a canned presentation. It has been said, “A good walk around presentation doesn’t work because it’s canned; it got canned because it works.” That’s what a walk around should be – not canned, but planned. Salespeople need to know where they are going all the time. Hopefully they can help guide the customer down the Road to the Sale.

Before we can attempt a presentation we must understand what a “feature” is and what a “benefit” is. A feature is what something is – a benefit is what something does. Let’s use automobile sales as an example. So let’s look at some car sales techniques. A “walk around” occurs when a salesperson pulls a vehicle out of the line of cars in front of the dealership. The salesperson opens the doors, the trunk, and the hood. They turn on the car and get the A/C running in the summertime (or the heater in the winter time). They take the customer and tell them about the vehicle as they walk around it.

The aerodynamic styling of a vehicle is a feature; great gas mileage and a quiet ride are the resulting benefits. A lot of salespeople are good at reciting features, but not at explaining why the customer needs them – and this is for two reasons. One is they don’t know enough about the car and the other is they did a poor job qualifying the customer’s needs. Ask questions of your customer. Ask what they want from their next vehicle and listen to what is said.

How can a salesperson enthusiastically talk about the double steel cargo box if they don’t know what the customer is going to use the vehicle for? They can’t.

In a typical selling situation a salesperson might say something like, “Yes sir, this car has everything you’re looking for: a fuel efficient engine and a hands-free Bluetooth communications system. It also has ABS brakes, limited slip rear axle, and terrain management.” Sounds all well and good, right? Wrong. There is nothing your salesperson has told this customer that 1,500 other salespeople and brochures and Internet research haven’t already told him.

So the customer looks at the salesperson like a deer in the headlights. He doesn’t know what he is what he is supposed to say, except what he is probably thinking, “I can see all of these options, Mr. Salesperson. Tell me something I don’t know.” You see, when the salesperson recites his or her cornucopia of knowledge, it isn’t a question so it doesn’t really move the sale forward. He is just repeating what the customer told him he wanted.

The customer’s only response is, “Yes, Mr. Salesperson, I can see it has everything I asked for. How much is it?” Or worse yet, the customer may say nothing. The worst thing that can enter a walk around presentation is silence. When there is silence, there is pressure and in the selling process, we want no pressure. As I mentioned many times, the only common ground a customer has is the price. When you stop talking, the only thing they can say is how much… or goodbye.

To do an excellent walk around, salespeople need to remember the thing the customer wants to know more than anything, “What will it do for me?” Until you tell customer that answer, then he is probably isn’t listening.

Back to the walk around – how long did it take me to recite the options above, 30 seconds? What do I do now? I am out of things to say. Obviously there are lots of options and I could probably go on for a while, but even if I could memorize them all on every model, the customer will be yawning. Why? Because he wants to know what it will do for him. If salespeople are just going to recite options, they would be better off to hand the customer a brochure and send him on his way. The brochure is better than a salesperson will ever be at features. They break down the passenger compartment to cubic inches for heaven’s sake! When it comes right down to it, does the customer even care that there is 28 inches of legroom? No. But he will be interested to know that, “Because of the transverse mounted engine, Mr. Customer, when you and your family take that trip to Colorado this summer you can really stretch out your legs!” That is how you sell legroom. Note: Without asking good questions, how could you make the above statement? But here’s the good news: you can make that statement even more powerful in two ways – by moving the sale forward and by asking for the order.

There are many ways to move the sale forward, but here are a few. These are simple phrases that keep the customer following you:

“Let me show you this feature on your new Ford Explorer.”

“Let me show you this,”

“Let me show you one more thing,”

“Great, follow me.”

Ask for the order, it is quite simple, for example:

“That’s a feature I’m sure you’d like, isn’t it?” The customer says, “Yeah!” The salesperson says, “Great, follow me,” or “Great, now let me show you one more thing.”

The above question is one which you should already know the answer. Use it with a feature the customer wants, for example, seat belts, air bags, crumple zones, etc. A customer just won’t say no to seat belts.

During the sale you are always closing — in sales terminology that means you are always asking the customer for the order. For example, a very successful salesman in a 20-minute presentation will ask the customer in several different ways, in more than a dozen times if they want to buy the vehicle.

Some of the best closing techniques to use during a sale are called tie downs. Some call them trial closes. A tie down is simply a question at the end of a statement that demands a response. Instead of saying, “Those airbags are a wonderful feature.” In the eyes of a customer, this is just an opinion. But, if I added, “Aren’t they?” to the end of that statement, it forces the customer to respond, hopefully in a positive way.

Or, “On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the highest rating, how would you rate this vehicle so far? What would it take to make that number a 10?”

However, sometimes a customer may say something that implies that they don’t like the vehicle. For example, “Oh, that looks like something else that will break.”

One way to handle these “objections” is to address the issue with the “Feel, Felt, Found” response. For example, you might respond by saying, “I can see why you might feel that. A lot of people have felt the same way, but once you’ve found out the engineering behind, you’ll see how beneficial this can be for you.”

These few tips will build the foundation for a confident walk around presentation.

– Learn your product inside and out, research what’s being said about your product on the internet.

– Get to know your customer’s needs in the initial greeting and qualification.

– Present with confidence and tie the features back to their needs.

– Help make their needs become their wants.

– Remember to refer to competitive brands and create value.

– Take full advantage of your product expertise when doing a walk around presentation and SELL yourself and your product.

And remember, selling is a process of listening to customer needs, finding solutions to their needs, building value you in your product or service, and giving them an opportunity to buy that product or service that serves their needs!

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Source by Vincent Hennigan

Views: 0

February 2, 2020
9 Steps To Living Abundantly

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Many of us are bowed down by life – stressed, short of time, tired, on a treadmill, knowing that this isn’t the way to live, but not knowing how to free ourselves up to live more fully, more abundantly. There are simple things we can do – they don’t take time or money – they take a change of attitude. Here are 9 of them:

1. Being totally financially honest – if you are not, this implies that there is not enough for you to have everything you need without dishonesty.

2. Creating a vacuum so that more good things can flow into it – don’t fill your life up with things you don’t really want. Ask yourself if you want each thing before you buy it. Don’t have abundant rubbish, live abundantly by seeking out the things and experiences that work for you in your core being.

3. Tithing is often associated with religion, but it is also possible to tithe in a non-religious context. This seems a really important aspect of living abundantly – every time you freely give money away, you are implying that you are confident that more will come – this is a BIG positive affirmation with a lot of power behind it. The traditional amount is 10% of your income. I’ve recommended this to lots of people, and they’ve told me that when they do this – magically – they seem to have more. I started with 10% but now I’ve increased it, because I’ve seen that the more I give away the more I get back, and the happier and more abundantly I live.

4. Being grateful for what you already have – focussing on the good that is already in your life. It’s easy to think about what you don’t have, but spend some time each day thinking about what you do have. Start each day by thinking of 5 things that you are grateful for – and express this out loud.

5. Resentment, jealousy, envy and self-pity interfere with the free-flow of abundance. If you are jealous or envious of someone, it implies that what they have is not available for you to have also. If you find it difficult to let go of these feelings, Bach flower remedies may help. Try the remedy ‘willow’ to counteract resentment and self-pity, or try ‘holly’ for envy, jealousy and greed.

6. Forgiving those that have wronged you is part of living abundantly. Holding on to your anger, however justifiable it may seem, keeps you stuck in the past, rather than going forward into a better future. If it’s difficult to let go of your negative feelings, try writing a letter expressing all your anger, hurt or envy. Write until you can write no more, and then burn it.

7. Being able to receive from other people. Being able to receive is healthy, but many people find it difficult. You may need to practice receiving. Think of the pleasure you get in giving. By not receiving generously you are denying other people the pleasure of giving.

8. Realise that in general ‘good luck’ plays a very small part in people’s life. (If you put your faith in good luck, then you have to accept the possibility of bad luck too.) People who put their faith in ‘good luck’ often spend their lives waiting for things to happen. People who don’t believe in luck go out and make things happen.

9. Believing that there is enough money, food, love, etc. in the world to meet everyone’s needs to live abundantly. I left this one till the last, because it can be very hard to believe when faced with war and starvation in the newspapers and on the TV, but a lot of this anger and need is caused because people who have do not believe they have enough, because they substitute money and food for all the other abundance of life. Do your bit to correct that imbalance and start living a life that recognises there are inequalities and shortages, but recognises that we can correct that so we all have what we need.

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Source by Jane Thurnell-Read

Views: 0

February 2, 2020
Book Summary: Unlimited Wealth – Theory and Practice of Economic Alchemy by Paul Zane Pilzer

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The basics of economics are supply, demand and scarcity. Economics best describes how to divide these scarce resources up amongst a growing population. Paul Pilzer takes a very different approach to Economics. He believes in Unlimited Wealth and shows examples of why technology and human ingenuity are the keys that unlock that wealth.

Why is this important to me?

I am not doing this summary to waste your time. It is my vision to provide concise action steps that you can adopt right now to enhance your financial life. Paul Pilzer writes of unlimited wealth creation. His spin is Alchemy is the creation of wealth while Economics is simply the method for moving it around.

I am really intrigued by the concept of unlimited wealth creation. If you look at human progress in free societies, the real difference has been in creation. Commodities and resources are in fact finite but the way we use them is what is unlimited. The ideas are unlimited. An acre of land today produces far more food than an acre a generation ago.

Unlimited Wealth discusses several major topics. For the sake of time, I will review the salient points outlined by Paul.

1. Supply Side Alchemy – The Wealth Equation: W=PT^n – This equation means – W (Wealth) = P (Physical Resources) x T (Technology) to the nth power where n is the effects of the technological advances. The expansion of physical resources depends on the technological advances. Supply side Alchemy consists of three laws. The key to this equation is what Paul calls the third law of Alchemy – The rate at which a society’s technology advances is determined by the relative level of its ability to process information. Let’s look at how society has progressed based on the third law of Alchemy. Humans figured out how to write, then the printing press was created, then the computer was created and purchasable by the average consumer. Now we have the internet, social media, search engines and everything else to share knowledge. The speed of information exchange is exponential hence so is our level of wealth.

2. Demand Side Alchemy – The demand side alchemy consists of the fourth and fifth laws. The fourth law states – By providing us with new products and processes that change the way in which we live, technology determines what constitutes a need, and hence the nature of consumer demand. In a nutshell, demand can be created by creating and innovating new products. Apple is on its way to be the first company to hit a Trillion dollar valuation. All of their products were created first and then the demand came from it.

3. Sixth Law of Alchemy – The immediate economic potential for an individual, an industry or society can be explained by examining the technology gap, the best practices possible with current knowledge, and the practices in actual use. This is important today because China and India are way ahead of the U.S. in terms of science and math. Technology strives on science and math and societies that adapt it faster will create wealth faster. This is where the balance of power can shift over time.

Unlimited Wealth is definitely a controversial study based on regular Economics theory. Since I am in the technology field, I agree with Paul that Unlimited Wealth can be created through technology and innovation. Products are being created right now that no market exists. Some of these products will fall flat while others will explode. Take a look at Facebook. This company came from nowhere and is now valued at over $50 billion.

I hope you have found this short summary useful. The key to any new idea is to work it into your daily routine until it becomes habit. Habits form in as little as 21 days. One thing you can take away from this book is scarcity is a negative mind set. I say this because if you believe in unlimited wealth creation then ideas will flourish.

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Source by Joe Mosed

Views: 0

February 1, 2020