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  • Should Marriage Coaching Or Family Therapy Be An Option For Your Marital Problems?

    Should Marriage Coaching Or Family Therapy Be An Option For Your Marital Problems?

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    In an article released by the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, customers of marriage and family counselors from over a dozen states reported on their experience with family therapy.

    The findings suggested that marriage and relationship counselors treated a large range of concerns in relatively short-term fashion. It said that couples therapy and marriage coaching are briefer than specific treatment, which customer satisfaction and practical improvement are rather high.

    Particularly, of customers from over 500 marriage and relationship counselors in over a dozen states:

    – Over 95% rated services outstanding or great

    – Over 90% would recommend their therapist to a buddy

    – Over 90% would go back to the very same therapist in the future

    – Over 90% stated they were assisted in dealing more effectively with problems

    – Over 90% were generally pleased with the service they got

    – Over 95% got the kind of assistance they wanted

    – Almost 75% indicated enhancement in children's behavior

    – Just under 65% reported enhanced physical health

    – Over 95% were pleased with the amount of assistance they got

    – Just under 55% reported improvement in operating at work

    – Almost 60% revealed enhancement in kid's school efficiency

    [NOTE] Excerpted from "Clinical Practice Patterns of Marriage and Family Therapists: A National Survey of Therapists and Their Clients", Journal of Marital and Family Therapy.

    While the above research study supplies raw information that supports the efficiency of marital relationship and household counseling, a very interesting conversation on the question, "Does Marriage Counseling Work" from a public forum devoted to this subject offers a less medical, but still positive view .

    I found that what seems to be an extremely sincere and frank conversation among couples, "who've been there," the response to the question of whether marriage counseling works is a favorable one.

    Will Marital Therapy Work for You?

    Regardless of the studies and viewpoints which seem to support the question of, 'Does couples therapy work,' there are those who question its effectiveness.

    Previously I had a discussion on 'what's going on today with males and how the men actually feel about close relationships and what turns the men on about women.'

    This got the subject going on the science of marital therapy is being studied in excellent detail these days. Research is showing that it is not as reliable as individuals believe that ladies seem to get more from it than men.

    Surely there are times when it may not have a long-lasting result on the couple's marital relationship.

    What type of couple gets the most from couples therapy? The response is young, non-sexist, still in love, open couples.

    Which couples get the least after finding what seems to the best marriage advice?

    Some factors that can make couples therapy not successful consist of couples who wait too long before seeking assistance. I mean that typically one or the other is set on getting a divorce and is closed to any suggestions that may save the marriage.

    It appears that couples who seek relationship healing or marriage coaching due to the fact that they want their relationship to work are more likely to prosper with marriage therapy.

    Many Do Benefit

    Yes, they will benefit more than those who enter into couples counseling with the (maybe hidden) reality that they really more deeply want out of the relationship.

    Again as the Course in Miracles further states, "It is still up to you to choose with truth or with illusion. Remember that to choose one is to let the other go."

    When thinking about best marriage advice, it's hard not to wonder whether seeing a marital relationship counselor will actually work.

    An honest marriage psychologist would agree that the inspiration of a couple might be the single most crucial aspect in identifying the success of marital therapy.

    It's not likely that even a fantastic counselor would be able to conserve a marital relationship where one spouse really doesn't want to put in the effort for relationship healing.

    The best marriage advice you find from a marriage therapist can most likely help a couple who are utterly devoted to making their marital relationship work.

    (I like to often suggest seeking out the web for more helpful material on things like should you separate or divorce now instead of trying to fix a broken a marriage or love relationship?)

    To success in healing and finding happiness!

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    Source by James Nussbaumer

    Views: 0

  • Questions Are the Key to Success in Business and Life

    Questions Are the Key to Success in Business and Life

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    It was Kipling who gave us what was perhaps the greatest advice for business success and, in fact, success in life that has ever been given. He told us the key to success in all areas when he said “I had six honest serving men. They taught me all I knew. Their names were: where and what and when and why and how and who.”

    The late great Earl Nightingale suggested we add two more friends to this group. They are, which and if.

    Whether you are seeking to find ways to increase sales or control and reduce costs, questions are the key. Whether you are striving to improve your customer service or the quality of your product, or your life, questions are the key.

    Asking the questions and developing the answers are the keys to any and all success you will have in business and in fact life.

    Questions like:

    If we do this, what happens?

    Why do we do it this way?

    Why don’t we do it this way?

    Who else can we sell to?

    Where else can we get this?

    What can we do to reduce costs?

    What can we do to improve productivity?

    What can we do to improve quality?

    What can we do to improve our service?

    How else can that be done?

    How can we do it better, faster, cheaper?

    How can we improve quality, service, and profits?

    How can we cut costs?

    If we do this, will we improve quality?

    If we do this, will it improve service?

    If we do this, will it increase profits?

    Which provides us with better quality?

    Which is best for our customer?

    What do we get in return for this cost?

    Who else can provide what we need?

    Why are we paying that much?

    Why do we not deal with another company?

    Why are we dealing with them?

    How many other bids have we gotten?

    What if?

    How can we replace that with equal or better quality for less?

    What are other companies charging for that product or service?

    What are other companies paying for that product or service?

    Will this process or step add value to our product or service or does it produce added profit?

    When would this investment pay off?

    You see my point I am sure. You must ask questions and seek out the answers. You must also justify the answers.

    You must never stop asking. If you are not continuously asking the questions and reacting to the answers, you are either assuming or stagnating. Either one can be deadly to your business.

    You must review every phase of your business. You may be very surprised when you see how little effort it will take to find huge savings and to make major improvements in how you conduct business.

    You can always improve how you do things. You must find ways to conduct business more efficiently, eliminate needless steps, improve quality, increase productivity, reduce errors, increase sales, ways to increase profit in a business, reduce expenses, and control costs.

    Let me give you one small example of how an assumption proved to be very costly at one company. One of the many products this company offered was a holiday label strip. This was simply a strip of peel off labels to affix to holiday presents showing “to” and “from”. Banks around the country would buy them and give them out one strip at a time to their customers around the holidays.

    For years this company shrink wrapped these in packages of 250 and sold them in a minimum quantity of 1,000. The shrink wrapping was time consuming and costly. I asked them why. Why did they need to be shrink wrapped? How did they know if this was important to the customer? What, if any, difference did packaging make to their customers?

    They asked the questions and found the answers. The answer in this case was that the customer either couldn’t have cared less about the packaging or did not like the shrink wrap as it simply meant more work for them to unwrap. After years of doing it the way they always did and assuming that was what the end user wanted, they found out differently. They now bulk package. They save between $20,000 and $30,000 per year and their customers are either happier or neutral about this change.

    Did this company sacrifice quality in any way to save money? No, they improved productivity, improved customer satisfaction, and, by doing so, improved profitability.

    Ask the questions. They are the key to the door of improvement.

    You should constantly be reviewing every area of your operation to seek ways in which you can improve. Use common sense. From office expenses to customer service, from distribution and production to quality control and shipping, you will be shocked at how little effort it will take to improve your operations, reduce waste and redundancy, and realize huge savings.

    From the way you sell things to the way you buy things, it is up to you to improve things. Improvement is always possible in everything we do.

    You possess the greatest power ever created and it sits right between your two ears. You own it, free and clear. All you need to do is put it to work.

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    Source by Derrick Welch

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  • 5 Major Reasons Why Marriages Break

    5 Major Reasons Why Marriages Break

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    Love: Yes, I mean love. I know you are wondering how love could cause a break up. It is believed that love is the basis of marriage. It is love that brings about marriage. You only marry once you realize that you love somebody else just as yourself. You can not marry somebody you hate. Unless is for some other reasons. When the sweet love you once shared turn into bitter, marriage is set to break. How will one live with a person that she / he resents so much. It is impossible, and that is why, most couples choose to separate and go their on ways. Every human being want to be loved. therefore, where there is no love, couples never stay together for long.

    In-laws: What part does in-laws play in your marriage? Well, there is no marriage without in-laws. When couples get married, they automatically get in-laws. Some of these in-laws are the best and some are the worst. One could wonder whether they ever wanted their son / daughter to marry. They interfere with their children's / brother's / sister's marriage a lot. Who is to blame in this case? In most cases, it is the in-laws from the husband's side that bring all these problems. In such cases the blame goes to the man. He should stand up for his wife at all time even if she is wrong. He should not be the one inciting his people against the wife. Am sorry to say this but some husbands have the audacity to bad mouth their wives to their families. Tell me, won't your in-laws hate you when they hear such bad things coming from your own husband? If you allow your family interfere so much in your marriage, then know that with time, your wife will get tired and call it a quit!

    Infidelity: This is the worst of them all. No one desires to be cheated on by the partner.in fact, if discovered by the other party, there is no forgiveness. When a man discovers that his wife is cheating on him, he can do the worst to the man involved with his wife. Women are lenient. On their part, they can forgive their husbands but will never ever love them again. Some women end up choosing to leave the man and even demand for divorce.

    Comparisons: This is a very painful reason for break ups. when a spouse chooses to constantly compare his / her spouse to another, it really hurt much. Even though the one doing it, could be doing it so unknowingly. In some cases, the spouse who does this comparisons, is aware of it and usually do it purposefully to hurt the spouse. The targeted spouse may in some cases, try to much up to the party being compared to and if the sacrifice is not noticed, this may lead to a break up.

    Physical, emotional and mental abuse: This is one of the major causes for marriage break ups. One couple could be abusive to the other partner. This could be physical / emotional torture. An abusive spouse is worse than a murderer. The reason is: they usually use intimidation and manipulation to keep the abused partner under control at all time. They are sadist! They never want to see their spouses happy! They beat them up, call them all sort of abusive names and even cause the other partner feel useless and unworthy. With such, the marriage will definitely break up especially when the abused get tired of constantly being abused.

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    Source by Leah Simiyu Mbatha

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  • My Husband Says He’s Going To Leave Me, And Yet He’s Still In Our Home – Why?

    My Husband Says He’s Going To Leave Me, And Yet He’s Still In Our Home – Why?

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    Often, when a husband announces that he is going to leave, a wife expects him to promptly pack his bags and begin the separation. It’s not that this is what the wife wants to happen. But when someone makes an announcement that is this serious, well, the assumption is that no one would want to drag their feet on this, as once the decision has been made, it’s probably easier to just go ahead and move out.

    However, this isn’t what always happens. Some husbands make this announcement and then they don’t really move out right away. Some are still telling their wives that they are leaving even as they continue to park themselves on the couch and make use of the refrigerator. A wife might say: “I truly don’t get it. Three weeks ago, my husband came home and announced that he is going to leave me. He said that our marriage hasn’t been good for a while now and that he thinks that we should take a break and live apart to see what happens. This isn’t what I want. In my heart, I feel like if he leaves, he might never come back and we might end up divorced. He actually told me that he wanted to leave on a Friday night. I expected him to move out that weekend. Why wait? If you’re going to take the initiative to tell your wife that you are going to leave her, I would think that you would want to leave as soon as possible. That isn’t the case, though. It’s three weeks later and he’s still in our house. He’s still complaining. He’s still saying he’s going to leave and yet he is still here. I’m afraid to ask him why he’s still here because I am afraid that he would take that to mean that I wanted him out. My mom says that he is essentially free loading or that he’s too lazy to find a new place, but that doesn’t make sense, as my husband earns more than I do. Why do men say that they want to leave their wives and then stay at home?”

    I can only speculate, because there are a variety of reasons. I will list some of them below so that you can see if any of them might ring true.

    He May Not Want To Actually Leave And Was Just Trying To Get A Reaction: Sometimes, a husband truly is frustrated with the marriage or the situation, but he doesn’t know how to create change. He may have tried to make a change without success or he’s afraid that you will be resistant or defensive. So he puts the “leaving” out there in the hopes that you will try to stop him or that you will then be open to negotiating change.

    He May Be Trying To Move Out At The Right Time Or In The Right Way: Some husbands do take their time in actually moving out. Many aren’t all that excited about moving from their familiar and comfortable home into a smaller apartment. Others will try to leave their wife in a good place before they physically move out. What I mean by that is that some will complete repairs and necessary maintenance before they leave so that their wife doesn’t have to worry about this.

    He May Be Having Second Thoughts: This is the final suggestion that I will make. We all say things or make decisions out of frustration, only to have second thoughts later. Actually moving out of your home and pursuing a marital separation is a huge step. And it would be completely normal for him to reconsider and then to hesitate to admit this. It’s possible that he’s hoping that this will just blow over or that you will ask him not to leave.

    Deciding Where To Go From Here: Since you can’t know which of the above is true (unless he tells you,) then you have to ask yourself what really matters the most. If you want to save your marriage, then I think you have focus on the fact that at least he’s still there – whatever the reason. It’s so much easier to save your marriage when your husband is physically present. When he moves out, it can be difficult to reconnect and to not have repeated misunderstandings since communication is limited and not always face-to-face. Yes, I know that it is frustrating that he’s sending mixed signals and that this is confusing. But I think that it is better to focus on the fact that he is there rather than questioning him and then potentially forcing him out. If you can use this time to improve things so that he doesn’t follow through and leave, then that’s probably the best option.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

    Views: 0