Tag: Understood

  • 10 Lazy Man’s Secrets To Online Riches

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    Nobody wants to stay poor forever. Everyone wants to earn to fulfill his needs, and at the same time have some savings. In most of the cases, the amount of money that a person makes depends on the hours he put in to his endeavor. Many a times we find ourselves lagging behind in making enough money so that we can fulfill all our needs rather than a few.

    Since time immemorial, men having been looking for secrets to riches, be it a treasure hunt, invading places, going through old maps and scripts, and what not. But not many have been successful in their quest to their steps to riches.

    But what if we can use some technique and have a proper planning to make more money than what we currently earn? That too, after a minimum initial hard work, we can keep lazing around but still be able to earn massively? Anyone would be lured. There are quite a few way that can make your steps to riches with smallest of efforts.

    The growing use of internet and the availability of information have worked wonders in lot of people’s life. The secrets to riches are to tap into this ever-growing market and use the potential it has to develop your business plan. The quick and easy setups, with absolutely no extra investment and quality content could lead you to earn a handsome amount of money every day. These secrets to riches are any lazy man’s dream, and it has proved its worth over the time. Let us try to find out what are the strategies and steps to riches these successful and rich men follow and earn as much for ourselves.

    1. The ability to make money is the most important step towards it. Concentrate more on the quality of the content rather quantity and you have taken the step toward success.

    2. Your ability to gel with online marketers helps a lot. The more networking you do, more are your chances of getting premium return from your website.

    3. Whatever product you sell you must have an authoritative approach in determining your superiority and assertiveness in the online area. This will reduce the competition and make your website best in class.

    4. Now that you have understood the basic requirements, you need to choose a niche for your website. Choose something that is creating a lot of interest but does not have much information on them. This is one of your secrets to riches.

    5. Research your website name and avoid any overlapping of names that might occur. That will divide the attention of the people between the two and lose out on opportunity.

    6. Seek proper guidance. You can do this yourself over the internet as there are thousands of tutorials or guides to help you set up the business.

    7. Find out what appeals to the crowd most. Try to provide for people with their requirements. In no time you will see people flocking towards your website.

    8. Set yourself apart. This will maintain the uniqueness of your website and the traffic will flow incessantly resulting in bigger revenues.

    9. Always try to provide an ‘order now’ button in your website. This will help you earn the referral and your credentials will definitely improve. This is one of the important steps to riches.

    10. Sit back after you have invested enough time to build your online presence. As you start to get more visitors you can see the money going up.

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    Source by Swati D Banerjee

    Views: 0

  • The Stark Difference Between Affiliate Marketing and MLM Marketing

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    If you had the time, would you work in the Network Marketing Industry?

    That’s the one question I like to ask people when they talk with me about needing to earn more money. And depending upon their answer, I like to follow-up by asking, do you know the difference between Affiliate Marketing and MLM Marketing?

    My experience is that they don’t understand the difference between the two business models. And these business models are very different. If people understood the difference. there would be more success and a lot less failure. ‘

    Affiliate Marketing is more like working as a sales representative. You have a position with a business and your job is to promote the product or service and close the sale. A good affiliate marketer is someone who likes to copy, paste, and post ads.

    The MLM business model is much different. It takes real entrepreneurship to become successful. This is not a business model that one can copy, paste, and post and expect any kind of success. MLM or Relationship Marketing as it’s commonly called these days takes a lot of work.

    Listed below are a few of the requirements and skills needed to grow a successful MLM Business.

    First you must be willing to be trained. Each MLM Company has its own policies and procedures manual and no two are exactly alike. So before even beginning your business read over these documents very carefully.

    Second you want to learn as much about the product as possible. You do not want to make the mistake of not knowing the benefits of your products and how they can add value your prospective consumer.

    Third you want to contact your up-line sponsor or if they aren’t available or are new to the business, then find a team leader. You need someone with knowledge to guide and direct you. But more importantly you need to want to learn.

    The criteria for any business regardless if that business operates totally as an off-line business, or an on-line business or as both, you want to know how to recruit people to grow a down-line team.

    MLM business models thrive on growing a good solid down-line. And the down-line must be taught that unless the product sells, then there is no volume.

    In most MLM business models, the down-line volume bonus is where the residual money is being made. So, product sales as well as recruiting new members are absolutely the fuels needed to drive the MLM business model engine.

    I like to think of it this way, the sale of the product is the gasoline for the engine and the recruiting of members is the oil that lubricates the engine and keeps it running smooth.

    If you are interested in working on-line, take the time to study the difference between the two business models, before you take the leap of faith to join. It can mean the difference between success and failure.

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    Source by Patricia A Gaines

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  • Health Is Wealth – A Conceptual Critique

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    People have different preferences towards available life options. Same is true for the statement “health is wealth”. What exactly is it? A simple preference that signifies health is superior to wealth? Or a comprehensive statement that indicates health and wealth are linked with each other, systematically and dynamically?

    Health is a comprehensive concept, it includes physical strength, mental power and spiritual-wellness of a person. On the other hand, wealth is the richness of a person i.e. abundance of money and worldly items. “Health is Wealth” is a simple statement but its meaning is so fabulous when deeply thought. People now a days refer the statement as when a person is healthy, he is capable of making wealth. On the contrary, if one is not healthy he/she cannot work productively, and hence won’t be able to generate income for independent living. This explanation is true but the deep meaning of this claim can be understood by the words of Virgil: “The greatest wealth is health.” Mr. Virgil is trying to enlighten the concept that the greatest wealth is health, not money or worldly items. There is nothing more valuable in our life than having a good health.

    Patrick Meagher said: “Some people are so poor, all they have is money.” Nowadays people are influenced by wealth improperly that they don’t even care about their health, the greatest wealth. They don’t understand that without health there is no real happiness and enviable success. A person with poor health is unable to enjoy the pleasures of life. I think such people are foolish enough because they do not care about their health. Our first priority should be to maintain our health in the best way.

    There are multiple methods and practices by which a person can stay healthy; Spending time in natural environment i.e. visiting parks and gardens. Physical exercise is also essential e.g. morning walks, playing sports, etc., it keeps a person smart and healthy. Water is the cure for all types of illness, so drink water to stay healthy and fit. Eating a balanced diet keeps people away from different illness and diseases. It is said that: “Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.” Abandon unhealthy practices and habits e.g. smoking, drinking and taking drugs because it harms internal parts of our body. Always be optimistic and cheerful because: “Laughter/smile is the best medicine.” On the contrary, an unhappy person is more prone to fatigue and other illness.

    Remember, living a healthy life can be the greatest gift you can give yourself because one cannot enjoy life if he/she is unhealthy. In addition, we must not harm our health by running madly behind wealth. I would like to conclude my essay on the nice words of Mae West: “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”

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    Source by Muhammad Ashhar

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  • You Can Heal Your Life Book Review

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    At a time in our lives where everything seems to be changing it is good to know that a book that was written many years ago still can have a profound impact on our lives.

    Louise Hay’s book “You Can Heal Your Life” is one of those books. I purchased the gift edition back in November of last year but didn’t actually open the book till the end of December. I know now that it was the perfect time for me to read “You Can Heal Your Life”.

    Over the past year I have been wondering what God had in store for my life, what my purpose in life was and feeling like I was running around in circles.

    I started to read “You Can Heal Your Life” during the two weeks that I took off at the end of the year. On January 3, 2009 I was hospitalized for Bell’s Palsy. After being released from the hospital I came home and immediately opened up the book again and looked to see what Louise Hay had to say about Bell’s Palsy.

    Bell’s Palsy-Extreme control over anger. Unwillingness to express feelings.

    For a couple of years I have struggled with exactly that! I didn’t want to show anger or express my feelings of despair or my feelings of feeling totally out of control. I wanted to yell at anyone and everyone who had hurt me or had in some way made me feel out of control, even so much as blame God and myself for what I was going through. But I could not do it, I could not blame others or let go of those feelings of anger…I wanted to but I just couldn’t express them for the fear of feeling even more out of control.

    After reading “You Can Heal Your Life” and working through my anger with affirmations that Louise suggested such as:

    “It is safe for me to express my feelings. I forgive myself.”

    I was able to express those angry feelings, I yelled, I screamed and then I release those feelings and let go.

    Amazingly this past week, my Bell’s Palsy went away! I am now able to smile again without having my face droop. It is amazing how what we feel inside and out affects our health.

    While I knew this to an extent, this time I understood thoroughly what I had to learn from this situation!

    I have always said I was a stubborn person for me it doesn’t take 3 times to be hit on the head, nope it takes a 4th time before I wake up…” The Bell’s Palsy was the 4th time I have been hit on the head 🙂

    Now everyday I open up “You Can Heal Your Life” or “The Present Moment-365 Daily affirmations” or “Everyday Positive Thinking” to remind me of things to say to myself that are positive.

    I just open the books and I believe where they open up I was meant to read that day.

    So if you are struggling with staying positive in this day and age or are wondering why you are suffering from an illness and are looking for help I strongly recommend any book written by Louise Hay or for that manner any book from a Hay House author.

    “If you are willing to do the mental work, almost anything can be healed”-Louise Hay

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    Source by Rebbekah White

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  • Holistic Approach For Faster and Better Healing – What Does It Include?

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    The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines the word holistic as follows:

    “relating to or concerned with complete systems rather than with individual parts”

    This term – holistic is used a lot these days in terms of healing and curing diseases/ailments. Looking at the definition, this seems to be an obvious route to rightful healing any particular ailment or disease.

    Diet

    When we visit a doctor looking for curing some of our physical issues, he/she will give us some medicine/drug. These days, doctors also prescribe dietary recommendations to follow for faster recovery. Why do they do it? Is the medicine alone not enough? You will say, there is an obvious reason. The medicine will fight against the undesired elements in the body and diet will help build strength at the same time normalizing the function and thereby facilitating the healing process, right? If there is such a holistic approach, the healing is better and faster.

    Stress

    It is very commonly understood that stress makes any ailment or disease worse. Therefore, stress management along with medicine and diet further accelerates the healing process. One might watch comedy movies, read positive books, stay in positive company, or take a walk in park, play some sport or exercise for eliminating stress and thereby helping the healing.

    The Energy Body

    The Energy Body interpenetrates the physical body and extends beyond it by a few inches. This is one another aspect that healing professionals are also looking into for a much more holistic approach. The energy body is also seen affected by various clairvoyants and the effect of working on energy body is manifested on physical body sometimes immediately and sometimes with a time-lag depending on various factors.

    Working on energy body alone does not seem to be a holistic approach either, although, there are many who are trying to do it. Just like traditional medicine is supported by diet and stress management, the energy healing/medicine can also receive equivalent support from traditional medicine, diet and stress management. It is ideal to do all four

    Counselling (Emotional Body)

    Another aspect that is also very important is our emotions and our will power. This is a deeper and very important aspect of healing that is mostly ignored. Are we emotionally and mentally ready to get healed? Sometimes medicines do not work, diet does not work, energy healing does not work. One of the reasons is our willingness to heal which is influenced to some extent by our emotions. One should also consider taking counselling sessions with the therapist, or with someone else or sometimes talking to ones own self also does wonders. The holistic approach should definitely include this aspect of healing as well.

    It will be great to know if any of the aspects are missed and comments on the description mentioned in the article. Feel free to share your thoughts by comments or email.

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    Source by Nazia Hirani

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  • The Catcher in the Rye: Mental Health Services and Social Connections for Children

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    The Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger, was required reading for my tenth grade English class. I remembered it as a story about the struggles of adolescence, the yearning for independence, and the reluctance to let go of youth. My son is now about the same age as I was when I read the book and we are living through his own nudge for independence, which sparked my interest to give the story another read. Before I began, I wondered what my take on the book would be at this point in life having survived adolescence and received training and experience in child development in addition to having a teen in the house. This reading accentuated the unresolved grief, family dysfunction, mental illness, and lack of social connectedness of the main character, Holden Caulfield, and how these difficulties exacerbate the issues experienced during the typical maturational process. As the country still debates gun control laws in the aftermath of Sandy Hook, and as we try to recover from the Boston Marathon bombing, The Catcher in the Rye reminds us about the importance of developing meaningful and genuine connections with our children and the need to address their mental health issues.

    The Catcher in the Rye begins as a flashback story about Holden Caulfield’s experiences leading up to his nervous breakdown prior to Christmas. Holden narrates the story while receiving inpatient psychological treatment on the west coast. The events begin at Pencey Prep in Pennsylvania, where Holden has been expelled due to poor academic performance, and conclude in New York City as Holden attempts to return home. During the course of his journey, Holden attempts to make connections with a number of people however, he fails miserably due to his social ineptitude, lack of appropriate treatment for what may possibly be bipolar disorder, and inability to believe that other people are capable of being genuine. Holden eventually makes it home and connects with his younger sister. By that time he has decompensated to the point that, even though he is no longer experiencing suicidal ideations, he feels disconnected, misunderstood, and alone. Holden decides that he is going to go away, to escape from society and the rejection, the loneliness, and the pain that he feels. However, Holden makes one last trip to see his sister Phoebe before he disappears. Phoebe’s caring, anger, and innocence provide Holden with the connection he is looking for; she is both a peer and dependent to him. Through Phoebe, Holden is able to cling to his childhood and put off making the leap to young adulthood and independence.

    One theme that I was more attuned to during this reading was the unspoken dysfunction of the Caulfield family. Holden frequently compares himself to his younger, deceased brother, whom he describes as brilliant and athletic, as well as his older brother, who has become a successful author. It is suggested that Holden is a challenging child, and somewhat of a disappointment to his parents as he has been unable to live up to their expectations. He has been expelled from at least four preparatory schools due to poor academic performance, he has difficulty socially connecting with others, and he has frequent mood swings. It is possible that Holden’s parents were drained from watching their youngest son battle with leukemia which left them with little strength to effectively deal with Holden’s grief and potential disability. In Holden’s eyes, they appear to have emotionally and physically divested themselves from him. He has little to no emotional family support and what appears to be very little communication with them. Holden is left adrift to navigate this tumultuous time in his life without support, understanding, and treatment. His efforts to reach out and communicate, including failing out of schools and getting into fights, are not understood as cries for help but are seen as personal shortcomings.

    Holden perceives most people as being phony, superficial, and hypercritical. This may in part be due to his social awkwardness, lack of maturity, and feeling of being abandoned by his parents. He is continuously let down by everyone that he reaches out to for help as they either don’t live up to what Holden has built up in his mind, or they try to take advantage of him. Therefore, Holden comes to believe that everyone is phony who doesn’t or is incapable of meeting his preconceived expectations. In addition, Holden clearly experiences moments of mania during the story, which are often followed by feelings of sadness to the point where he does express some suicidal thoughts. It seems that the lack of communication with his parents, the unresolved grief and guilt over the death of his brother, and the inability to effectively and appropriately connect with others result in Holden being unable to interact with others on anything but a superficial level. The exception to this is Phoebe. Her reluctance to let her brother leave provides Holden with the strength to go home and ask for help. However, in the end, Holden continues to suffer from a lack of love and feelings of loneliness. He states, “Don’t ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody.” At this point, Holden continues to find it difficult to have genuine, meaningful relationships believing that when you open up to people that they will turn away from you in order to keep the relationship on a superficial level. Holden continues to be plagued by this emotional void and, while there is a hunger for social connectedness, he will continue to experience emptiness and rejection due to his quirkiness.

    For me, reading The Catcher in the Rye in high school highlighted the struggle for independence and Holden’s war on hypocrisy. On this reading, I was able to obtain a better understanding of the tragedy that occurs as a result of Holden’s parents being unable to provide him the emotional support that he needs to overcome his brother’s death and deal with his mental health needs. Holden’s repeated failure to socially connect and develop a meaningful relationship with anyone other than his sister and the lack of treatment for his mental health issues made me think of the recent tragedies in Colorado, Sandy Hook, and Boston. It reinforced the need to take mental health needs and services seriously; just because these conditions are unseen doesn’t mean that they aren’t debilitating. Feeling cared for and connected to others reduces the stress, stigma, and isolation that are associated with these conditions. It made me wonder whether these tragedies could have been avoided if the people involved had received appropriate therapy and treatment. They may have felt connected and accepted, and these tragedies may have been avoided. The message of being accepted and cared for from The Catcher in the Rye continues to be relevant to young people today as we all strive for acceptance.

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    Source by David Pino

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  • Energy Healing And Body Talk

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    These days there are so many healing techniques available to us, like

    Quantum Touch

    Massotherapy

    Touch for Health

    Zero Balancing

    Healing Touch

    Chiropractic

    Chakra Balancing

    Ki Gong

    the list goes on and on. It’s exciting to know that more and more people around the world are accepting the healing value of alternative and complementary modalities.

    When we take a class in any one of these invaluable techniques, the focus of course is on learning the technique…

    –how to protect ourselves from picking up clients’ “stuff”

    –how to channel or run energy through our bodies out to our hands

    –how to approach and treat certain kinds of issues

    –the body mechanics we use, etc.

    What I see missing from the classes is how to assess the body healing type of the individual we are working with. What do I mean by that?

    Over the years, doing energy healing from the 1980s to the present time, I started to realize that with each person, I was addressing the energy flow to their bodies in a different way. Yes, there is the technique to follow, but after a while the practice becomes almost second nature. I found that as I was “listening” to the bodies, I was “talking” to them differently. And I haven’t found that kind of body talk mentioned anywhere in the energy healing field.

    Of course, I think that each energy healing therapist has a particular way that their inner dialog with the client feels most comfortable or most natural. But what I found was that, when I shifted my own inner preference for how I channeled or ran energy to match my client’s healing type, their recovery occurred in shorter lengths of treatment time.

    So here’s what was shown to me in the course of my years in energy healing: There are three basic types of healing preference that each body has: physical, mental, and spiritual. That seems to line up nicely with the complementary approach to body-mind-spirit healing, which is about the triune nature of being human. But what I’m referring to is the dominant energy healing preference each body is wired for. Each person’s body responds most effectively to the type of energy transfer that matches his or her own energy healing type.

    So sometimes I found I would be silently talking to the body and explaining what it was going through and encouraging it to heal itself. “Yes, you had a bad fall. You know your knee is injured, and you know how to fix it. You know how to do this.” This silent body talk flowed into their bodies along with the energy. This was obviously for a mental body healing type.

    Other times I found myself praying. Sometimes it was a standard prayer, sometimes it was a free-flowing appeal to the person’s guides or angels or Christ Spirit or Mary or an archangel or the Universal Healing Forces. Whatever came to mind to say, this prayer-type energy flowed into the spiritual body healing type.

    And of course, there’s the physical body type. This was a bit of a challenge for me, since most of the energy healing I do is in the bio-field around the body and there’s little or no physical contact. But the physical body healing type needs to feel it for it to respond more readily with its own inner healing mechanisms.

    So I’d touch the area in need, sometimes deeply, while my inner body talk with that person was more along the lines of a cheerleader, “Here it is. Go. Fix this. You can do it.” Or sometimes there wasn’t that much dialog, just a lot of purposeful contact while I ran energy.

    By the 1990s, I figured it would be easier for me to know ahead of time which client was which body healing type before the session started so that I could start the body talk right away. Since I’d been learning how to do dowsing, I asked my pendulum what the type was. You can probably also use finger-muscle testing, if you’re familiar with that. It’s a simple yes-no process of elimination as you ask which healing type your client is.

    There were some surprises that I learned along the way, too. People who I thought for sure would be one type turned out to be another, even though their personalities clearly indicated something else. Like my Dad. Here was a guy who was totally immersed in 3-D. If he couldn’t see it, it didn’t exist. A very physical guy. When he got older and started having health problems (and let me work on them, which wasn’t all the time), I dowsed and – lo and behold – his healing body type was a spiritual!!!

    Then there’s my Mom, who I thought for sure would be a spiritual type, but the dowsing told me she was a physical! She believed in the old-country ways of laying on of hands, had a strong church connection, which Dad didn’t have, and was even known to have healing hands when she was younger (which was great for us as kids). But her body responded more effectively to the physical body touch-approach.

    It reminded me of something I came across in the Edgar Cayce holistic health readings. He talked about the “body mind” as though it was something different or separate from the conscious mind. And now I understood that. The body does have a mind of its own. And when we address that clearly, it responds more readily to whatever healing energy we deliver.

    Another surprise was that some people turn out to have dual types. This is more rare, but when you find it, it gives you more variety in how you frame your inner dialog with the body.

    Finally, one night in the late 1990s as I was meditating, it was revealed to me that what my guidance had shown me described the way our Master Teacher, Jesus the Christ, healed people. For many of us, Christ’s healings in the New Testament were our first exposure to energy healing, even though we probably thought of it as magical or superhuman, not something we could all do (even though He said we could). Maybe even some of the priests and pastors of our formal churches did the “laying on of hands.” But think about this:

    When Jesus healed the blind man, he put mud on the man’s eyes and rubbed it in. Then the man could see. This was an example of the physical body healing type. The man needed to feel something happening to his eyes.

    When He told the cripple that his sins were forgiven, or to rise up and walk, He was addressing a mental body healing type. The man simply got up and walked away. There was no contact at all with him.

    Finally, when a woman touched the hem of His garment and He asked her why she did that, she replied that that’s what she knew she needed to do to be healed. Definitely spiritual or faith healing.

    There also is one other example of a type of healing Jesus did and that was when the Roman soldier asked Him to heal his good servant who was not present at the time. This was a beautiful and dramatic example of both distance healing for the servant and faith healing on the part of the soldier.

    During the course of working with many clients over the years, my own guidance has revealed techniques and understandings that were invaluable in helping my people regain function and health sooner and more easily. You can use this information for yourself as well during those times you need to amplify more healing resource into your own body. I hope you find this information applicable in your own interactions with people in need.

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    Source by Cheryl Salerno

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  • Tony Robbins – Personal Power II – Day 17 – Wealth Conditioning

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    “Money is nothing but a means to measure the exchange of value between people.”

    ~ Tony Robbins

    Many of us have pain associated with wealth in an approach/avoidance dance. Because of events in our past, we can call these “wealth wounds”. There can be lots of sensitivity about financial issues and so if these wounds are not healed, it is impossible to gain a ton of financial resources.

    Generally speaking, poverty and lack brings out the worst in people and abundance brings out the best. People who are living in poverty tend to have the highest criminal records, the most drug use and the most unhappiness. Being one of the consistently broke group of people doesn’t help you or the group. You can do more good by becoming wealthy in order to be able to give back.

    There are seven reasons why most people never make it financially.

    1). They associate negative things to having or making money. Remember, the past does not equal the future.

    2). They do not set having an abundance of money as an absolute must. Unless we decide what is a necessity, not an option, how can there be any improvement?

    3). Having an effective strategy of building wealth is non-existent for them. To condition yourself for great wealth, strategies must be developed for

    • attracting money into your life
    • managing your dollars
    • sharing your money, which will give you much happiness

    4). They are unable to follow through consistently on their financial goals. Finding ways for your money to work for you, such as harnessing compound interest which can take a lot of pressure off if you have time to watch it grow.

    5). They depend too much on the “experts.” There is no one who cares more about your money than you do. Experts are valuable, but you need to take care of your money and taxes. If you make errors in these types of decisions and planning, you will be ultimately responsible, not your professional.

    6). They become financially complacent. Many people take their wealth for granted. Whatever you fail to use, you will lose. It is a good idea to note that if you do well with what you have, you’ll be able to get more and, if you don’t actively create welth, itwhat you have will be taken from us. Don’t hoard what you have.

    7). They allow financial challenges go from bad to worse into financial ruin. Most likely, the road to wealth is not a straight line. If and when problems arise, stay in the game and ask great questions to help get back on track.

    Be willing to transform crisis into opportunity. By having financial faith, you can learn from the situation and find even more opportunities.

    The assignment:

    Give yourself a financial checkup to find out your “wealth wounds” so you can heal yourself quickly:

    1). Ask yourself to list the beliefs that you have that hold you back.

    2). Is there a specific amount of money that is an absolute MUST? Is this number the “must” for your life, or is this number the ability to live comfortably by paying your current bills?

    3). “Never leave the site of setting a goal or making a decision without taking some action towards its fulfillment. Make sure you do some action to set you on the course for financial mastery.

    4). Find something in today’s session to start feeling like you’re making progress. Remember, tiny actions lead to a pattern of habits which ultimately can be used to create the financial freedom we all deserve.

    5). You can make a list of financial terms or aspects of financial management that are not fully understood. Find the people or resources who cn provide answers about these things.

    6). Remember we talked about complacency? Write a paragraph about the “why” you will follow through with your plan and avoid complacency. Recognize the excuses you used in the past. Mastery is the only option now.

    7). Ultimately, what frees us from fear, is the belief that we are much more than anything that could ever happen to us financially. Write down one or two situations that seemed very difficult that you pulled yourself through. Remind yourself that you have this capacity to turn challenges into success.

    Sometimes our “wealth wounds” are most tender to try and heal, but the good news is that there are ways to heal them. One way is to find someone who has successfully gotten where you’d like to be. You can “model” after their example if you find out exactly what they did and then follow that pattern.

    Taking the time to do these exercises will teach you more about yourself. Fine tuning the skills in this lesson will provide additional ways to condition yourself for success.

    Onward.

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    Source by Deb Bauer

    Views: 0

  • My Husband Doesn’t Love Me As Much As I Love Him – Tips and Advice That Might Help

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    I often hear from wives who have some issues with whether their husbands are “in love” with them or not. And, if the husbands are, the wives often measure this love by degrees, as compared to how much the wife loves him. I often him comments like “my husband doesn’t love me nearly as much as I love him. I make all of the concessions and advances in the relationship. He never makes any effort or shows me any attention or affection. It’s as if he merely tolerates me. He doesn’t ask me about my day or make any effort to engage with me. It’s like I’m someone who just merely coexists. On a scale of one to ten, I love him on a level that’s an eleven. And he loves me on a level that’s about a one.”

    I understand that this is a lonely and frustrating place to be. I experienced this in my own marriage and the way I handled this almost ended that same marriage. Through experience and research, it’s become pretty clear to me that there’s a right way and wrong way to handle this situation. I will discuss this more in the following article.

    Score keeping Is Not The Best Idea For A Marriage. The Question Isn’t Which Spouse Loves The Other The Most: The Question Is Do Both Spouse’s Feel Loved?: I understand how depressing it feels when you suspect that you’re the only one who’s really “in love” or trying to keep the marriage afloat. But sometimes, wives focus so much on measuring how much their husband loves them against some imaginary yard stick that has few (if any) implications on real life. This doesn’t really do anything to change or improve their situation.

    I often tell wives to give up comparisons and worry instead about whether they’re feeling loved, wanted and valued. Obviously, the answer is most likely to be negative, but at least you’ve shifted your focus from score keeping to something on which you can take concrete action.

    It can also be very important to understand that men aren’t as demonstrative as women. So, expecting your husband to be a spouse that compares to you in terms of demonstrating their feelings may not be totally realistic. Very few husbands express their love and affection in the way that wives typically do. This doesn’t mean that they don’t love you enough. It just means that you’ll need to teach him how to express himself and you’ll need to encourage the behaviors that make you feel noticed, understood, and loved.

    Some wives tell me that they resent having to do all the work and having to train their husband to do something that he should just automatically do. These points are certainly valid. But, in my experience, it’s better to give a little in exchange for getting what you truly want than to remain angry, frustrated and indignant while you’re not getting your needs met. It’s important to address and fix this before you yourself begin to withdraw. Because when you have to spouses who are on the edge of indifference, this can leave the marriage in real trouble.

    When You’re Worried That Your Husband’s Lack Of Affection For You Means He’s Not Invested In The Marriage Or May Eventually Want Out: I often find that the wives who tell me that their husband’s don’t love them enough fall into two camps. The first is a situation where the marriage is probably really OK, but the husband has either gotten into the habit of not showing his affection or needs to relearn that lesson. This scenario is easier to fix.

    The second scenario is that the husband’s lack of affection is due to issues within the marriage or with his no longer being invested in it. This is the scenario which you often can not afford to ignore. Because often, his withdrawing from you is a symptom of a much bigger problem. So, attempting to teach a husband to show you the feelings that just aren’t there isn’t likely to work.

    Instead, you’ll need to examine why the feelings have left, fix and address the issue, and then reevaluate. This is likely easier said than done. Because in the same way that husband’s aren’t demonstrative, they also often don’t have a firm grip on their feelings and perceptions. They may well know that something is wrong and act upon it. But, unlike us, they don’t lay awake at night exploring and turning over the issue. They’re more reactive. When something is wrong, they withdraw and reshuffle their efforts instead of thinking about their feelings.

    They may not even be aware that they are doing this or even understand why they are doing it. And that can be one reason that they insist that nothing is wrong or that you’re imagining things. Since they haven’t pondered what the issue is (or even that it exists) you look like a real nag or complainer when you address the symptom of it. That’s why you’re often much better off just working and acting on your own (especially at first.)

    One of the biggest mistakes that I see many wives make is that they harp on a sensitive subject with an already distant and detached husband. So, they’re already on shaky ground and it’s clear he’s resistant, but they think that if they can just get him to “work” on solving the problem, things will get better. The problem with this is that he’s already begun to withdraw. He likely doesn’t want to “work” on the marriage, at least right now. You’ll have to return him to a point of being invested before you can gain any real ground.

    Most wives understand this deep down, but they hesitate or rush because they don’t know how to get their husbands to be receptive to them again. The key is often to take inventory of the marriage and see where the husband might not be getting what he wants and then to provide that without needing to have any large or painful discussions about the same.

    And, that’s a common place where wives get stuck. I often hear comments like “But how am I supposed to do this? I’m already the one whose providing all of the attention and affection and that’s not working either.” Often the question really isn’t the demonstrative affection (at least on the husband’s end.) The real issue is often the real connection, and the feeling of being truly heard, valued and understood. It’s also important that both parties know that no one is going through the motions, score keeping, nagging, or trying to manipulate the other.

    I often tell wives to focus on what they can do very genuinely and convincingly. Husbands know when you’re just putting on a show or trying to overcompensate for what is really the underlying problem. They don’t want more of the same. They don’t want to be manipulated. They often want real change and improvements instead of worrying about how things look on the outside.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

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  • Jeffrey Archer’s "Old Love" Redefines Love Story

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    The “Old Love” of Jeffrey Archer is a unique amorous tale between two brilliant students of English literature from Oxford. Archer makes an exploration of the theme of love from a completely unusual standpoint. The rendition is fiercely honest while he portrays a chronic sense of envy and rivalry between two sworn arch-rivals in the Oxford University: William Hatchard and Philippa Jameson. Initially, their aggressive competition unsettles their tutor Simon Jakes. In their constant intellectual debates, Philippa confronted the deep, confident voice of William with her high-heeled boldness. The mutual hatred was absolute. Their sharply perceptive and analytical mind refused to be submissive to each other. Indeed, this fierce sense of competition enabled them to outshine everyone else in the field. Given the background of 1930’s she, to him, was “that silly woman” and he “that arrogant man”. Yet strange is the way of destiny that an unusual love story should blossom between the bitterest of academic rivals!

    This rivalry assumed an unpalatable intensity when both excelled as toppers in their final degree exam. The Charles Oldham Shakespeare’s essay writing competition fed fat to this fire of passionate jealousy and became a life and death question for each to defeat the other.There were liberal exchanges of scornful remarks between the two to play each other down. However, things took a dramatic turn when William unwittingly discovered about the death of Philippa’s father (who was a Vicar) from cancer, and also, his secret dream to let his daughter study in Oxford and win the Charles Oldham award. The sight of silent sobbing of his proud and powerful adversary stirred up a sudden feelings of empathy in his guts. He got over his tentative doubts and offered to accompany her to her village for the burial ceremony. They held hand for the first time and discovered the new bond of friendship as they started their journey to her village. They communicated with each other spontaneously while returning to Oxford which bounces Philippa back to her normal competitive spirit. She slowly discovers the growth of her new found intense attraction for William. The latter secretly enjoys this interesting conversion in the Vicar’s daughter.

    The transformation of hatred into love has always been a captivating subject in itself, and Archer makes the situation entertaining with the employment of sparkling wit in their conversation. They make a visit to Stratford and have meals together. But their first date was far from usual: it is a unique blend of warmth and intellectual antagonism! If this instinctive antagonism triggered a strong sense of hatred before, now it drew them closer. In fact, this killer instinct became a delirious source of entertainment for both. Archer makes the reader question if intense hatred could indeed be an expression of hidden attraction?

    Anyway, the situation takes a quirky turn while returning from Stratford. On their way back to Oxford, Phillipa and William had to spend the night in a car as the petrol gauge showed empty. The former obviously did not miss the chance of expressing her doubt about the cerebral power of a person who couldn’t even read a petrol gauge! The day next William gave her the reason why he let the car run out of petrol: He said with a rare sense of humor: “My father told me if I spent the night with a barmaid then I should simply order an extra pint of beer, but if I spent the night with the vicar’s daughter, I would have to marry her.” He came down on his knees and said,” Will you marry me if I win the Charles Oldham?” Philippa answered that “as there is absolutely no fear of that happening I can safely say, yes… ” When William declared his love for her she told him not to show his face in Somerville again if he failed to win Charles Oldham. The readers wonder if the writer reveals Philippa’s secret wish that she could marry himeven at the cost of losing Charles Oldham! Otherwise why would tears come to Philippa’s eyes when a girl informed her that she had won? It was a moment of crisis for her because between the conflicting emotion of ambition and love in her heart, the latter had won and for once the proud girl confessed, “I do love nothing in the world so well as you; is that not strange?”

    However, when she discovered that William was a joint winner, her puckish spirit returned as she said ” I take thee for pity” to which William replied ” I yield upon great persuasion… ” They were locked in a passionate embrace, and after that, they were never apart for more than a few hours. Strangely, their honeymoon in Athens ended up in a heated argument over the relative significance of Doric and Ionic architecture!

    Later in life, this constant battle of wit prevented their romance from dwindling into boredom and banality. Their serious research works and creative activities, though on different fields, kept them deeply connected. After three years, “with well-received D. Phils”, they moved on, in tandem, to college teaching. But their fierce encounters continued and their sharp wit at each other’s expense would flash across the dinner tables at Oxford. However, those who understood their love felt envious of their unique relationship! They were childless yet their life was not tasteless.

    Returning home after the celebration dinner (being declared the Joint Professor), their heated argument over Proust’s monumental work took such an intimidating turn, that a policeman, nearby, asked Philippa “Is everything all right madam?” “No, it is not”, William declared “this woman has been attacking me for over 30 years, and to date the police have done deplorably little to protect me”. Yet, beneath this apparent antagonism, their bond continued to grow stronger with each passing year. Interestingly, their intense love was inseparable from their zealous intellectual antagonism which lent a peculiar aura to their relationship. When Philippa was made the Dame of the British Empire, William referred to her as an “Old Dame” he had to live with now. It is this bitter-sweet flavor of their love which defines their marriage.

    The most irritable habit of Philippa to William was her determination each morning to complete “The Times” crossword before he arrived at the breakfast table. One fine morning in June, William, studying the clue, filled in the eight boxes left incomplete by Philippa. Philippa’s instantly retorted that there was no such word. To the delight of Philippa the word “Whym Wham” could not be found in the shorter Oxford Dictionary. William assured her that the word could be found in OED on his desk, made for scholars like him. William left the breakfast table with sharp comments on Philippa’s limited command of English language and that she will have to eat a humble pie at Somerville’s Gaudy Feast as she reads the collected works of John Skelton…

    William left with a sigh, kissing his wife on her cheek, wishing he had lost Charles Oldham. Philippa replied that he did indeed because it was highly inappropriate during those days to declare a woman as the sole winner! Having closed the front door, as she entered the kitchen, Dame Philippa suddenly suffered her lone heart attack. She called out to William hoarsely but in vain. The news of her death was conveyed and the story ends with a note of dark humor in the suicidal note of Sir William (who shot himself with his pistol): “Forgive me, but I had to let her know”. There was the volume of the work of John Skelton held open in one of his hand with the word “Whym Wham” underlined neatly, his fingers stiff and cold around it. Such weird ending, subtly hints at the essence of special relationship this couple shared so that they rise above the great marriage vow “TILL DEATH DO US PART.” Archer’s love story excels because death could not part Sir William and Dame Philippa! Even while following his wife to her grave, William felt the need to camouflage the inseparable bond they shared, and the insufferable loneliness he would feel without her… he does it with a wry sense of humor!

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    Source by Mandira Mazumder

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