Tag: Ugly

  • Drugs – An Ugly and Temporary Escape From Reality

    Drugs – An Ugly and Temporary Escape From Reality

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    People that use drugs to cope with life do so because of what the drugs do to them. Most drug addicts have experienced pain from something that has happened to them in the past and the drugs, for a short time, have made that pain go away. Once they realize that the drugs do in fact make them feel better is when the abuse begins to happen.

    Most drugs do a great job of taking reality out of the minds of the user. They feel free once the drugs begin to kick in. They don’t care about the past or anything of that pain that has haunted them and they feel invincible living in the moment. The only problem is that each time the addict does the drug, he or she needs to do even more of it to get to the same feeling.

    What drug abusers don’t understand is that the drugs don’t take away from the problem, they only add to it. The reality of life never goes away it is just masked and distorted due to the effect that the drugs have. In order to overcome this life full of pain and hurt is not to go to drugs for relief, but to deal with life head on. And this is what the drug rehab places do so well.

    Drug rehab centers are there to help the addict overcome their physical addiction to the drug or drugs. They then confine in the individual to learn that the drugs are in fact not their best escape but just a temporary release that compounds their own situation for the worst. True relief from the pain that haunts them is to see the past for what it really is, something that happened before and is now out of everyone’s control. Once they realize that they can’t change something that has happened, they can then learn to live life from this point on.

    The drug rehab centers goal is to educate the addict about their illness so they can understand how to control their mind and eventually learn to live a productive life. They hope to instill in them a confidence that any goal they set to achieve can be accomplished no matter what their situation was or where they came from.

    Drugs are in ugly escape from reality that gives the user an invincible feeling for a short amount of time. Drug addicts too can change but first have to become knowledgeable about their situation and then want to make the change.

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    Source by Wade Davis

    Views: 1

  • The Four Horsemen of Marital Apocalypse

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    Stop to consider your last fight with your spouse. The exact subject may escape you at the moment. We understand. After a while, the spats – over bills, your job, in-laws or the dishes still in the sink – can all blur together. But contrary to popular belief, it’s not the amount of conflict in your marriage or what you argue about that determines your relationship’s survival rate. to marriage researchers, how a couple fights tends to be the best predicator of whether they’ll end up enjoying their golden years together or battling it out in divorce court. So learning to fight less may not be quite as important as learning to fight fair.

    Four Deadly Sins of Marriage

    Dr. John Gottman of University of Washington, one of the foremost marriage researchers, claims he can predict with 90 percent accuracy if a couple will divorce. In his storied “love lab,” Gottman studies how couples interact, particularly how they communicate with each other in heated moments. After 30 years of research, he has pinpointed four behaviors that seem to invariably spell disaster in any marriage. He ominously refers to them as “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.” Every couple needs to be vigilant and ensure none of the four gallop into their marriage and wreak irreversible havoc.

    Horseman #1: Criticism

    The most common horseman that emerges in long-term relationships is criticism. Frustrations, annoyances and resentment inevitably build up when couples live together – day in and day out. And criticism can be how these emotions manifest in the heat of an argument.

    Note that criticism differs from complaining. Criticism focuses on the person. Complaining focuses on the behavior. This may seem like subtle nuance but research shows it is a distinction that makes a significant difference in the long term. For example, this is a critical statement: “You always drive around in circles. You are an awful driver with a terrible sense of direction.” These words are dripping with blame and accusation. They are a personal attack.

    Unlike criticism, complaining has more to do with how the other person’s behavior makes you feel. Complaining usually begins with an “I” instead of “you”: “I get so frustrated when you are driving and don’t know where you are going.” See the difference? The second statement is a negative comment about something you wish were otherwise. So though “I” statements can seem awkward, they really help keep the carnage manageable during explosive moments.

    Horseman #2: Contempt

    You’re an idiot. You can’t do anything right. You make me sick. These contemptuous words have no place in any relationship you value. They are meant to explicitly humiliate or wound. They are toxic and indefensible. Period.

    Contempt includes but is not limited to name-calling, hostility and sarcasm. Keep in mind that contempt can also be conveyed non-verbally. An excessively harsh tone or disgusted eye roll can escalate your garden-variety argument into WWIII in the blink of an eye. Avoid contempt in your arguments at all cost. It is the basest, most childish tactic to resort to in a fight. Strive to respect your wife even when you disagree or feel upset with her. Contempt is like a poison. It will single-handedly erode intimacy. It destroys a sense of security and mutual respect. It does real damage because it makes a partner feel belittled and unloved.

    Horseman #3: Defensiveness

    Criticism+Contempt=Defensiveness. Defensive statements become practically an involuntary reflex in homes where contempt and criticism are regular visitors. It is understandable. After all, who wouldn’t put up their guard in response to an accusatory, belittling spouse? Defensiveness is fundamentally a self-preserving tactic.

    As understandable as this response can be, it is still hugely destructive. It builds walls. Rather than allow room for connectedness, the foundation for conflict resolution, it tends to breed emotional distance. Defensiveness blocks healing and forgiveness.

    Horseman #4: Stonewalling

    Because stonewalling is not explicitly aggressive, couples often underestimate its destructive potential. But it can be just as devastating to a relationship in its passiveness. It is, in effect, giving up. It is withdrawing emotionally. It is essentially closing the door to a resolution.

    Stonewallers withdraw partly because they can feel overwhelmed with emotion. They may keep their faces expressionless, avoid eye contact, hold their posture rigid, avoid any signs of listening such as nodding or encouraging sounds. They radiate icy distance and disapproval to their partners.

    The Secret to Fighting Fair

    Now that you know the four horsemen, make a conscious effort to keep them in the stable before they trample your marriage. One of the best ways to do this is to make “repair attempts” during your next argument. According to Gottman, repair attempts are any words or actions that prevent a conflict from escalating out of control. As simple as it sounds, repair attempts keep a marriage from becoming negative, hostile and distant.

    Repair attempts can be as basic as changing the topic, giving a compliment, apologizing or saying, “I’ve been cranky all day, can we start over?” It can be as simple as saying, “Don’t worry, we’ll get through this” or cracking a joke to diffuse tension. Research even shows couples who touch during arguments also tend to show higher relationship satisfaction. Do whatever works for you when conflict rears its ugly head.

    Remember, the more entrenched the negative patterns of behavior in your marriage become, the more difficult it becomes to break them. Don’t become a victim of these negative cycles. When two mature people can take ownership and be flexible, they will keep their marriage strong even though they may not always agree. As a Scottish proverb says, “Better bend than break.”

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    Source by Grant Langston

    Views: 0

  • Entrepreneurship – Craze of Present Generation

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    An Entrepreneurship sets up an enterprise for profit motive and rightly so. But if you start your business with the 'Show me the money' attitude, rest be assured that you will not go very far!

    Ever wondered why in the world of Entrepreneurship, some carve a niche for themselves and stand out from the crowd, while others, even though successful, have a mundane existence?

    Well it all lies on certain qualities that an Entrepreneur may possess or the way certain activities are conducted by him / her. Here are special skills which you need to hone to become the Successful Entrepreneur.

    Everybody has a certain goal in life which just refuses to go away or change. You must understand this goal to be the calling of your life. Write down this goal – It will time and again remind you, how important it is to achieve this goal and will not let you sleep until you achieve it and become a celebrated Entrepreneur.

    Share your Dream with Right people – Law of Entrepreneurship

    In this world of make belief, you should be able to distinguish between the good, bad and the ugly. Many Entrepreneurial dreams die a quite death because somebody labeled it 'stupid' and constantly put you down until you also started believing your dream to be stupid and chose to abandon it. Share your dreams with only those whom you trust and are actually the propellers of your life.

    Find yourself a Mentor – Key Role in Entrepreneurship

    Someone who has already been there after many trials and turbulence is the right person to advice you. Somebody who has been there and done with can impart some priceless wisdom which you can use to carve a niche for yourself. But you must be very clear about what you will gain from the mentor-men-tee relationship. This will determine whom you can tap for assistance. The right Mentor will always short-cut your leaning process and give you the push you need and help you to stay task focused.

    Observe deeply and Practice Incessantly

    An Entrepreneur must consciously set aside some quite time to take on board any new ideas, things to learn and allow your mind to wander. You never know what your 'downtime' can fetch your business! Similarly only incessant practice will make an Entrepreneur perfect. Short cuts have never helped anyone in life. It is only your endurance for more and more practice that will give you results.

    Seek Challenges in Life

    The yardstick of success of an Entrepreneur is measured by the challenges he / she has overcome. Never be scared to consciously seek challenges in your Entrepreneurial life. Remember challenges are not setback of life. They are simply life's way of requesting you to make full use of the resources and tools available with you to resolve them.

    As an Entrepreneur you must have the skill set to select the right tool at the right time to overcome the challenge.

    Welcome Criticism – Challenge in Entrepreneurship

    In your journey as an Entrepreneur, be ready to welcome criticism from associates / citizens / clients / and sometimes even friends and family. There will be people out, there highly critical of your product / service. You must possess the gall to take such criticism in your stride and take them positively. If praise motivates you, then criticism must stimulate you to do better and better, not the opposite. If you cannot accept criticism, then your ego is getting in the way of your best judgement.

    Be Self Driven not Ego Driven

    An Entrepreneur must be proud, confident, self assured but not ego driven. Be humble and let your feet be planted firmly on the ground. Let your actions and achievements speak for you, not your boating and bragging. The more you brag, the more will sound phony. Remember, it is the empty vessel which makes the most noise.

    Carve a niche for yourself

    An entrepreneur must try to find out his niche area. Each of us has a special ability, a quite story which sets us apart from others. Play around with this strength and craft your own persona. Of you try to become a carbon copy of some you admire, you will never be able to make a name for yourself. Remember, the original always looks better than the copy. So leave your idol on the pedestal to be admired from a distance.

    What Goes Around Comes Back.

    As an Entrepreneur, you must try and help and benefit others. Give whatever you have in abundance- your time. your service or knowledge to those who are badly in need of it. You will be amazed at what you stand to gain when you give it to others.

    Value Learning over Money – Basics of Entrepreneurship

    An Entrepreneur sets up an enterprise for profit motive and rightly so. But if you start your business with the 'Show me the money' attitude, rest be assured that you will not go very far! Instead show humility and value what you have learnt in your journey as an Entrepreneur. Money will follow you steadily and surely, if you apply what you have learnt.

    Be Thankful

    Be thankful that you could become an Entrepreneur, be thankful that you could learn your failures, be thankful that you are at the receiving end of so many blessings and above all, be thankful that you are alive!

    Gratitude always unlocks the fullness of your life and indeed will make you the celebrated "A Successful" Entrepreneur.

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    Source by Akshay Lendey

    Views: 0

  • Overcoming Mindset Challenges

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    We all have those days, we drop our heads and get down on ourselves; you might even let out a few expletive words for good measure. Our pickleball play is just not up to our, or the USAPA player rating standard. It’s frustrating. I’ll let you in on a secret I learned long ago from a coach who pushed us to achieve; your state of mind or your mindset, plays an enormous role in your successes and failure.

    Carol Dweck, author of Mindset, identifies 2 types of mind-sets; fixed and growth. The fixed mindset has shaped you from birth, it is what you are and has defined your belief in your potential. An innate conviction fashioned from external influences and internally interpreted. A fixed mindset, sees obstacles when faced with change and challenges and therefore will interpret failure as self-defeating in the lack of abilities. It’s like looking on the other side of the court and thinking that the grass is greener – your opponents seem to have all the right moves and it’s your lack of something that is keeping you from winning.

    On the other hand, the growth mindset is one that is embryonic. Here is where belief in ourselves can help us adapt and grow in the ways we want by developing our talents through hard-work and dedication. Learning to love our development playing pickleball and also developing a resilience to loss is the key.

    Hear Those “Voices”

    Learning to overcome a fixed mindset challenge begins with learning to control your emotions and then you can achieve optimal performance during competition. First, you need to pay attention to those negative voices; you know the one’s – from family members that expressed failure or the one’s from coaches that uttered a lack of talent. There may have even been laughter from classmates or club memberships. A mentor who would snap when you hit a setback. You may have developed a reactive “habit” – automatic response to an emotional stimuli. Pushing those old suppressed buttons will give you a release and an understanding but despite their best intentions, this can also trigger an emotional upheaval, easily sweeping you away. Fortunately there is one way to stop the spiral of uncontrollable emotional reactions – refocusing. Consciously stepping back to draw your focus into your senses and the physical effects they may manifest; elevated heart rate, sweaty palms, nausea, tight or tense muscles, anxiety, and shallow breathing.

    Acknowledge and Accept

    Staying in the present moment, acknowledging that these physical effects are poignant, so you can process the information as if you are a doctor observing a patient. Comprehend your emotional arousal as an imaginary threat, and your intensified state of mental stress or physical excitement is a normal response that can be reduced by controlling your emotions. Slow down. Accept that you can help your brain learn to process new “habits” to effectively stay grounded; stretch and breathe, visualize or focus on energizing cues that epitomize how you want to perform or transfer negative energy to positive energy.

    Choice

    You have a choice; interpret negative challenges or setbacks from a lack of talent fixed mindset or from a positive aptitude growth mindset. When you doubt your talent, change your focus – with time and effort, believe you can learn a particular skill or achieve a goal. If you hit a setback or face criticism, keep learning and persevere.

    When the grass on the “other side” draws my attention, I stop and reframe – finding the courage in myself to think of the “water”, or successes that keeps my grass green. I still find myself under stress, and I still hear the “voice” of my fixed mindset. I have learned to face the criticism; sometimes old responses rear their ugly head and I get angry – hitting the ball without thinking and making unforced errors. Other times I am able to put those voices in their place. I interpret my challenges, and setbacks then regain my emotional control. It’s all very personal.

    Over time, learning to take on the pickleball challenge wholeheartedly, gaining wisdom from setbacks, and acting on the criticisms you face by embracing the growth mindset can make it work for you.

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    Source by Patricia H Kuhnen-Beaver

    Views: 0

  • Why Not Have A Happy Marriage While Avoiding The Crash Of A Divorce?

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    It is very important to find both present moment joy and pleasure about happy and successful married life and your future.

    Happiness is of the keys to a successful marriage and is the fuel for a significant life, and without it we can not appear to get the life we want.

    Ways to find happiness and to have a successful marriage is not always a simple solution, and yet you have to be conscious of it.

    You must concentrate on the things that you have in order to find that you both have a happy married life.

    Many folks prefer to dwell on the important things that they do not have and even pine over them.

    When people can not find happiness in their own life they do not know the best ways to grow and discover into happy married life.

    How to possess the keys to a successful marriage means the aspect that you already have actually found happiness in your own life.

    In regular times, individuals understand exactly what they are blessed with.

    Others, who just merely crave exactly whatever they see and want it severely and obsessively, are never pleased for their worldly belongings can not fill the empty void inside of them.

    The best ways to discover happiness in a marriage starts with everybody finding happiness with God.

    When mood swings are in the air and lift you up assisting you to forget concerns, God will help you through your state of mind.

    Happiness is the normal state of grace for mankind.

    Take a look at a little child taking its first steps with a proud smile and you will realize that state of grace I’m speaking of.

    The little child does not want anything in return, it is genuinely pleased.

    For the next few days hang around looking for your pure instants of joy.

    Each instant in your life kept filled with enjoyment will help you to keep happiness and joy in your marriage.

    Please count the moments of joy that you have felt. How to find happiness in a marriage is by your mindset.

    Being truly happy is everything!

    Previously I discussed free available information on saving the marriage today by staying happy in such an often conflicting world.

    True happiness is a mindset of observing the excellence of grace within you constantly flowing your way.

    We need to understand how to keep from sinking far too low while we journey through this world.

    The trick to finding joy in our own lives and of our marital relationship is to get into the habit of searching for advantages, rather of griping all the time about whatever that has failed.

    Pleasure offers us a sensation of power and energy.

    Delight means being excited about now and about the future.

    I always thought that to discover actually JOY in your life that you need to follow these simple fundamental guidelines.

    You need to put your inner divine Self first in your life, something Jesus and so many other masters were here to teach us.

    Jesus has channeled to us through the Course in Miracles that, “My holy brother, I would enter into all relationships, and step between you and your fantasies. Let my relationship to you be real to you, and let me bring reality to your perception of your brothers.”

    Always put others upfront in your life, and have a caring attitude toward the world in general.

    That has always been my mantra, so to speak, for a better more fulfilled happy life and a happy married life.

    You must focus on the things that you have within you and learn to reflect that abundance and joy to the material world, in order to find happiness in your marital relationship, too.

    Be sure to extend your inner bliss.

    Remember, when you have no inner bliss being projected to your life in this world, you can not ever realize how to find happiness in a marriage.

    How to discover happiness in a marriage stems from the element that you already have discovered joy in your own life.

    On the other hand, a once happy married life for some folks turns into to an ugly matter of the divorce.

    (Please also note, I suggest seeking out the web for more helpful material on things like, how coping with divorce may need to be addressed, and if so, learning to redirect the mental power of our errors into positive results.)

    To success in love and life!

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    Source by James Nussbaumer

    Views: 0

  • The Number One Way To Cure Acne Completely

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    There is only one way to cure your acne completely. Medication won’t work. Drugs won’t work. Over-the-counter products won’t work. Home remedies won’t work. They will only work on the symptom of your acne, not the real cause. Thus, even though they seem to work at first, it will only be a temporary result. And guess what? You need permanent result, not temporary.

    So, if you want to clear your acne completely (I mean, completely, not partially or just temporary effect), there is only one way to do it. The only way to cure your acne completely is to eliminate the root cause of your acne. You are not going to work with the symptom of your acne. But, you will work with the root cause, the source of all this ugly mess that you call acne. And there is only one effective method to cure your acne from the root cause of it: The Holistic Method.

    Basically the holistic method is divided into 4 main elements:

    1. The Right Understanding

    It is important to understand fully about your acne. Your acne is a condition that is caused by toxic accumulation within your body. It means that since the cause is within your body, then no matter how hard you work to destroy the symptom through external skin treatment methods, they won’t work to cure your acne permanently. Why? That’s because you are not eliminating the cause. If you keep the cause within your body, sooner or later new acne will appear on your skin, and once it appears, it will be worse than before. So, the right understanding needs to be obtained in order for you to be able to work to cure your acne condition in the right way.

    Note: This is not the only information that you need to learn. There are many myths about acne that you need to debunk as well.

    2. The Right Mindset

    Approaching acne with the wrong mindset will only bring you deeper into depression. For instance, if you think that you can’t cure your acne because you already suffered it for many years, it will not help you to cure your acne at all. In fact, your mindset will make you to become more and more stubborn in denying the possibility that you can cure your acne, no matter how bad it seems to be. Having the right mindset will help you to build the strong foundation for your acne healing process.

    Note: Holistic method will seek to balance your mind, body, and spirit at the same time. So, it’s not just a treatment for your body.

    3. The Right Dietary Habit

    “You are what you eat.” Have you ever heard about this saying? That’s true, because what you eat will build your whole body structure. Remember that all your body organs, including your skin, are built with substances that are obtained from your foods. Thus, your foods play an important role in curing your acne. It is a lie to believe that diet and acne don’t have any connection at all. It’s just a marketing gimmick to make you want to buy some over-the-counter products or some other miracle drugs that promise you instant clear skin.

    Note: Holistic method will provide you the most effective dietary plan that will allow you to cure your acne in the most effective way and in the shortest amount of time.

    4. The Right External Treatment

    Just because acne is caused by the substance within your body, doesn’t mean that you should neglect your external skin treatment. It is also very important to treat your skin from the outside. However, the holistic method will usually focus on using only natural products (usually from plants) in order to do it. External treatment alone will not cure your acne, but combined with the other three aspects, this will be a great way to boost your healing process, as well as prevent your acne from coming back to your skin again.

    Note: Most people rely only on external treatment. That’s why they only see temporary result or no result at all. The right way to use external treatment is to combine it with the other treatments (mind, body, and spirit) as well.

    So, that’s it. You already know about the best way to cure acne completely. Let me repeat it: The Holistic Method. The only hope for you, who are suffering from bad and severe acne condition right now, is to cure your acne holistically. This is the only way to be completely free from your acne condition, once and for all.

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    Source by Riz J. Natalie

    Views: 0

  • The Single Sales Principle and The 8 Myths of Selling

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    The Single Sales Principle states that:

    ‘People buy when a compelling need is met by a credible solution that offers perceived value’.

    Simple. Too simple? Well, as Jim Collins claims in his book Good to Great, “Freud, Darwin and Einstein all had one thing in common. They took a complex world and simplified it.” And Single Principled Salespeople do just that. They understand that selling doesn’t have to be complicated. They simply make it easy for a customer to buy.

    It’s one of the two things they have in common. They are customer centric, not sales centric.

    The other thing that Single Principled Salespeople have in common is that they never follow the 8 myths of selling. Simply never.

    The 8 myths of selling were taught by well-meaning sales managers, eager to pass on the wisdom and knowledge that their sales managers had passed on to them. Like a cult, however, no one had questioned whether they were true. The 8 myths may have worked in their day, but they simply do not work today.

    Do you remember how you felt when you discovered there wasn’t really a Santa Claus? I remember it well. It was the 12th December 1971 and my (so called) best friend Johnny Harrison broke the fateful news to me over a Curly Wurly. I felt like I had been had. You don’t question what you are told as a kid; you just believe it to be true.

    Well, that was also the way I felt the day that I discovered that everything that I had been taught up to that point in sales was a complete lie; all myths. They were theories that had no substance in the modern world.

    Walk onto most sales floors and you’ll see the 8 myths of selling proudly displayed on the wall (probably next to the target and the ‘Inspiration’ poster):

    “Attitude Sets Altitude”

    “People Buy People”

    “Always Be Closing”

    “Customers Like to Talk about Themselves”

    “It’s a Numbers Game”

    “Sell the Sizzle not the Sausage”

    “Money Talks”

    “Fail to Plan, Plan to Fail”

    Be honest, you believe in at least half of the 8 myths yourself, don’t you? You are not alone.

    Most salespeople will quote them as the ‘sales gospel’. Suggest that they are myths and they will think you have gone mad.

    On the surface the 8 myths look perfectly reasonable. In fact, set inside a picture frame, each one looks positively motivating. And I am sure they made a lot of sense, at the time. But things change. And so has selling.

    Myth 1: Always Be Closing

    If you need to use closing techniques to get a sale, you clearly haven’t demonstrated that your product meets their needs. Rather than force the customer into a decision they will regret, simply go back to where you lost them in the buying process, and start again from there. If you apply the Single Sales Principle® you don’t need to close… the customer should be asking you to buy.

    Myth 2: Attitude sets Altitude

    Abraham Lincoln asked the question: “How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn’t make it a leg”. No amount of looking in the mirror and telling yourself ‘you’re a tiger’ will work if you don’t believe in your product.

    The better the value proposition, the better the attitude of a salesperson. Single Principled Salespeople ensure that they have a deep, genuine belief in their value proposition.

    Myth 3: People Buy People

    People buy when the product/service cost-effectively meets the customer’s needs. No amount of schmoozing with a client will make up for a poor product match.

    Being personable is, of course, important in sales. But isn’t it important in all vocations? Friendly plumbers are more pleasant to deal with than unfriendly plumbers. Friendly bus drivers are more pleasant to deal with than unfriendly bus drivers. Friendly lawyers are more pleasant to deal with than unfriendly lawyers (unless they’re on your team of course!) Ken Hubbard, the American writer said “Beauty is only skin deep, but it’s a valuable asset if you’re poor or haven’t any common sense!”

    In the good old/bad old days, salespeople would use their charm (‘beauty’) to cover up for this lack of a credible solution (‘common sense’). Today’s professional buyer can see through that. It’s what is underneath that counts most.

    Myth 4: Customers Like to Talk about Themselves

    We have sat on thousands of sales calls. Some were good. Some were bad. And some were downright ugly. The bad ones were those where the salesperson doesn’t ask any questions at all. They launch into their features and benefits without any consideration for what the buyer may actually needed.

    And then there were the ugly calls. The salesperson knew that they had to conduct a fact find, and gain as much information about the customer as possible. So they launched into a ‘Spanish inquisition’, asking a list of meaningless questions that did nothing but bore the customer.

    Yes, there is a certain amount of information that needs to be identified in a sales intervention, as without it it is difficult to make a recommendation and know whether the opportunity is worth fighting for. But this is all for your benefit, not theirs. Needs make sales, not customer biographies.

    Myth 5: It’s a Numbers Game

    Average salespeople get a long way by putting in long hours and running around contacting a lot of people. They then submit ‘phantom forecasts’; over-optimistic sales projections based on a pipeline of proposals that never convert into actual business. This is because the needs identified in the sales call were not compelling needs.

    Just having a need doesn’t mean that the customer will act upon it. Many of the deals on a salesperson’s pipeline remain unclosed because the customer keeps procrastinating over the decision. Playing the numbers game doesn’t help them deliver more sales. It just creates more work for themselves and everyone around them.

    The Single Principled Salesperson ensures that the needs are compelling prior to presenting the solution. Why? Because only then are they assured that the customer will be motivated into action.

    Myth 6: Sell the Sizzle, not the Sausage

    We love the concept of making presentations sizzle. Our issue with the myth of ‘selling the sizzle’ is with how salespeople think that they can bamboozle a customer with fancy presentations that are high on show but low on substance.

    At first sight, ‘selling the sizzle’ seems to make perfect sense. The sausage sizzling away on a griddle is much more likely to sell than an uncooked sausage sitting in the fridge. But this is because the sizzle fired up your senses bringing attention to the fact that you are hungry. The sizzle satisfied your compelling need.

    Ever smelt a sizzling sausage when you have food poisoning? It would probably make you feel even worse. This is because this time your need isn’t hunger. In fact, food is the last thing you need.

    Myth 7: Money Talks

    Listen to buyers and you’d think that they really do believe that money talks. Buyers are a brutal species, taking sheer delight in making a salesperson sweat on price. They trick them into thinking it is all about cost, and if the salesperson doesn’t drop their price they will find a supplier who will. Indeed, some buyers actually believe in this hype themselves.

    But customers actually want value, not the cheapest price. If people wanted cheap we would all be driving around in 10-year-old cars and shopping in charity shops. Products are only perceived as expensive if the value is not appreciated by the customer. You’ll never lose a deal on price, only on value.

    Myth 8: Fail to Plan, Plan to Fail

    Salespeople tend to fall into two camps: those who plan too much and those who hardly plan at all.

    Those who plan too much tend to be ‘busy fools,’ i.e. running around doing very little. When we go out with these salespeople on calls they show us all the planning they have done: a tour of the client’s website; the previous history; a list of questions they are going to ask; competitor information etc. The problem is they don’t even refer to it.

    The second type are those salespeople who do very little planning. Indeed, most salespeople fall into this category. You may be surprised to learn that so do Single Principled Salespeople.

    “Hooray!” I hear the cry from the sales community at large. “What? No need to plan?” Not quite!

    Peter Drucker, the management guru, defined the difference between ‘effectiveness’ and ‘efficiency’ as being:

    “Efficiency is doing things right; Effectiveness is doing the right things.”

    Single Principled Salespeople are effective because they identify the right things to do. It’s why they often work fewer hours than the average performers.

    The cartoonist, Doug Larson, said on time management, “For disappearing acts, it’s hard to beat what happens to the eight hours supposedly left after eight of sleep and eight of work.” I think we can all empathise with this sentiment. Life is too short to be planning for the sake of it.

    The 8 Myths of Selling Summary

    Winston Churchill said “Out of intense complexities, simplicities emerge.” Selling has become a complicated business. But it doesn’t have to be. Simple is good.

    And that’s why great sales people follow the Single Sales Principle®. By focussing on matching compelling needs with credible solutions that offer perceived value you will succeed in selling. We guarantee it. Follow the 8 myths and you will become frustrated and disillusioned with our wonderful profession.

    Original article written by Mark Blackmore (MD of Lammore)

    For more information on the ‘Single Sales Principle’ sales training programme contact:

    Ben Thompson

    ben.thompson@lammore.com

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    Source by Ben Charles Thompson

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  • My Wife Constantly Criticizes Me – The Hidden Truth to Why She Does This and How to Fix It Fast!

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    Are you stuck in a marriage where you’re helplessly saying my wife always criticizes me? It’s troublesome, to be honest downright annoying.

    But the truth is that you created the environment for this to happen, and now you have to create the environment where it WON’T happen. But you’ve got to do it right or things can just get worse…and fast!

    What To Do When You’re in a Marriage Where You’re Saying My Wife Constantly Criticizes Me

    There’re really only a few good reasons why you’d be saying my wife constantly criticizes me. The great part is that nearly all of them lead to one major problem, which means that there’s really one major fix. It’s getting this fix right that can be the sticking point.

    So what are some of the reasons that your wife is constantly criticizing you? Let’s go through them now…

    Reasons Your Wife is Criticizing You…

    Resentment – Many times criticism stems from resentment. It’s basically a passive aggressive way of her telling you that she resents you. Jus think about when you resent someone, how every little thing can bother you about that person.

    And when resentment rears its ugly head the weapon of choice is usually criticism.

    Lack of Respect – Now this one can be a bit tricky and here’s why. Your wife may not have respect you for different reasons. But it’s very likely that the reasons that she’s put forward aren’t really the true reasons at all.

    Most of the time when a woman doesn’t respect you, she’ll try to tell you that it’s because you’re not doing enough of the stuff like buying flowers, and being sweet and lovable. But usually she doesn’t even realize that this is NONSENSE, and basically completely opposite of the real reason.

    The real reason that a woman usually loses respect for her husband (barring that there’s no abuse in the relationship) is that you’ve lost your MAN status in the home. In other words you’re no longer the captain of the ship that she NEEDS in order to have that respect for you.

    Your wife, by the very nature of her DNA…going way back from her ancestors in the caves MUST have you being the alpha male in the home, or she cannot respect you and therefore…

    She’s Not Attracted to You – In a nutshell, it all comes down to attraction. It may sound hard to believe, especially when the problem started out as “my wife constantly criticizes me” that it would come down ultimately to attraction, but it does.

    If your wife resents you it’s because you’ve lost your manhood status. You’re no longer the alpha male that she needs in her life. If your wife has no respect for you, it’s for the same reason. How can she have respect for you if you’re not evoking the very qualities that she needs in a man? If you’re not being the man that she needs to have, then she’s basically by nature got every right not to respect you any longer.

    If she resents you and has no respect for you, then she cannot be attracted to you. And the fact is that a wife that is attracted to you will move mountains to be with you. A wife who is ultimately down to her core attracted to you, will worship the ground you walk on. You’ve seen this with your own eyes, every time you’ve seen a woman who was with a jerk, or an ugly guy.

    The fact is that she respected and was completely attracted to that guy, because HE was a MAN who exuded ALPHA MALE status. Become that guy and you’ll no longer be saying my wife constantly criticizes me!

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    Source by Jason T. Nelson

    Views: 0

  • How To Marry A Millionaire!

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    Exclusive Online Dating Services – or How to Marry A Millionaire

    Whether you're rich or wanting to marry someone rich – there are online dating services which target the wealthy and provide a personal service to their clients.

    So, are they for real, or just a con to make you get your credit card out?

    Checking for "exclusive dating" on the internet came up with four top online dating sites: –

    DatingAgency.com

    This is a professional looking site, has nice photos of it's clients but there's nothing to indicate that you could find a millionaire or millionaires here – though you might find love.

    MillionaireMatch.com

    This is a website that is targeted at successful professionals who are probably too busy to get out and about and date. They describe a millionaire as someone who earns $ 150,000 and more annually.
    However, the site does also point out that you don't need to be rich and famous to enjoy the site and it is open to those earning rather less than $ 150,000!

    Berkeley-Sweetingham.com

    This is truly exclusive dating with a service and price tag to match. Just reading some of the magazine articles quoted on the site is enough to make you realise that this is out of the ordinary league and reserved for those with a few million to spare.

    If you're not in that category, it's worth a visit to the site just to find out how the "other half" lives. Would you fly to Nice (in the south of France) for a date for the day – well, you get the idea!

    Marry-an-ugly-millionaire-online-dating-agency.com

    If you need a good laugh and want to enjoy a very amusing, completely spoof online dating site – you'll want to check this out.

    Someone with a good sense of humor set this site up and it's clearly popular – and rightly so. If you're fed up with the online dating scene – this is the ONLY site for you to visit.

    And finally …

    There are plenty of genuine sites out there that offer free trials for men and women simply looking for love. Take advantage of these to find out which sites and forums you enjoy and best of luck!

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    Source by Jennifer C

    Views: 0

  • My Wife Talks to Other Men – The Ugly Truth to WHY She Does This and What You Must Do to Fix It!

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    Are you unfortunate to be in a world where you’re saying my wife talks to other men, and don’t know what to do about it?

    That’s a terrible thing to witness and watch happen. I know it rips your heart out, and you want to end it fast.

    The truth is that YOU probably caused this, and that you can’t fix it by force, but only by changing some things about yourself.

    A Careful Understanding of Why You’re Stuck Wondering Why My Wife Talks to Other Men

    Here’s the deal with this problem of your wife talking to other men. We want to nip in the butt as soon as possible. But you unfortunately can’t go with your initial gut reaction of trying to stop it by force.

    But first let’s understand a couple of things about why this is happening.

    First off, if your wife talks to other men, then it’s likely that there’s something that she’s looking for that she’s not getting from you. Now that hurts to hear, but don’t worry because there’s a solution to the problem. It’ll take some work on your part but it’s only a few things that you’ll have to change.

    Second, your wife MAY be, if she’s doing this out in the open, trying to elicit a response from you. If that’s the case, then you’re still in trouble potentially but there’s a little more hope. Either way, we can fix this problem.

    What Your Wife is Missing and Why You’re Saying My Wife Talks to Other Men

    So the most likely cause of this problem is that your wife doesn’t see you as the man that she wants and actually instinctively and literally down to the core of her DNA needs!

    Therefore it’s more about what she’s NOT seeing in you, than about what she sees in these other men.

    What she’s not seeing in you are Alpha Male qualities, that each and every woman needs to see in order to be attracted to. Whether you’re in a nightclub, at the grocery store, in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, or MARRIED…the fact is that a woman must see you as a leader…an ALPHA MALE…if there’s any hope in her feeling attracted to you.

    A lot of men feel like it’s a natural thing for a wife to lose attraction to her husband after marriage, but the fact is that it’s up to you to keep the qualities that she’s attracted to.

    She needs a leader, someone who displays that they’re in charge. There are a few traits that you must possess for her to see you as that sort of man that I don’t have room in this article to go over.

    However, the overall picture is that if you’re saying my wife talks to other men, then she doesn’t see you as her alpha male, and if you become that she’ll have no more reason to look for it in other men at all.

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    Source by Jason T. Nelson

    Views: 0