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Tag: Trauma

  • Using Sex Toys With a Bent Penis

    Using Sex Toys With a Bent Penis

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    More and more men (and couples) are incorporating sex toys into their sex play, and with good reason: sex toys can be fun and can add a new layer into someone’s sex life, especially if it has become a trifle routine. Some men, of course, are resistant to using sex toys, for a variety of reasons – worries that using sex toys makes them less of a “real man,” for example (which is far from the truth) or that there could be penis health issues from their use (generally not a problem if used properly). And many men with a bent penis assume that their excess curvature makes using sex toys unfeasible – but that is simply not the case.

    What kind of bent penis?

    It pays to define terms, especially one like “bent penis.” The fact is that, while many men have a perfectly straight penis when erect, many others sport an erection that offers some curvature. For some, there’s a graceful swoop up or a slight leaning to the left or right, or a small inclination downward. This can make the manhood even more aesthetically pleasing to some women, and as long as the curvature is not extreme or causes pain, then such a condition is not a problem.

    However, sometimes a man has a penis so bent that it does create issues. If the curvature is such that it impedes penetration or causes pain during sex – or even when simply in an erect state – then a man is usually diagnosed as having Peyronie’s disease.

    In Peyronie’s disease, the bent penis is typically the result of a build-up of scar tissue in the penis, often over a long period of time. This usually is the result of trauma to the penis. It can be a large trauma, such as being hit in the penis by a line-drive baseball. But it also can be the result of many episodes of small trauma, such as the penis being handling extremely roughly during partner sex and/or masturbation.

    Sex toys

    Because an extremely bent penis may make penetration difficult or impossible, many men assume that sex toys are off limits. In fact, many sex toys are still very much an option for a man with a bent penis.

    For example, penis rings can still be used, especially if he has found that maintaining erections is challenging. These rings constrict blood flow out of an erect penis, often enabling a man to stay firm for a longer period of time.

    In addition, penis extenders or sleeves may be a benefit to him and his partner. These are typically hollowed out silicone items in a phallic shape which fit over the penis. Some men find that these straighten out their bend somewhat (while they wear them at least) so that they can more successfully engage in penetration.

    In addition, Peyronie’s sometimes causes a loss of sensation in the penis, making ejaculation and orgasm more challenging. Using sex toys such as anal plugs, prostate massagers or dildos in the anus can stimulate the prostate, which often helps bring about ejaculation and orgasm in many men.

    As always, men should be certain to follow the directions when utilizing sex toys and to consult with a doctor if there is any reason why sex toys might pose an issue for an individual man.

    Whether they have a bent penis or not, men will enjoy sex toys even more if they keep the penis in good shape, which can be aided by regular use of an excellent penis health creme (health professionals recommend Man 1 Man Oil, which is clinically proven mild and safe for skin). Be sure that the selected crème is going to deliver a sufficient range of vitamins – especially vitamins A, B5, C, D and E. And the chosen crème should also include L-carnitine, an amino acid with neuroprotective properties which helps maintain proper penis sensitivity.

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    Source by John Dugan

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  • Waking the Tiger, Healing Trauma, by Peter A, Levine

    Waking the Tiger, Healing Trauma, by Peter A, Levine

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    Many people who have suffered tremendous emotional trauma (for example, the recently bereaved, people in war-torn countries, those who have been tortured or sexually molested) or physical hurt (e.g. severe neglect, debilitating injuries) recover entirely or near completely from their tragedy. However, others do not fare as well and continue to relive the same horrific experiences of morbid fear, anguish, and anxiety for a prolonged period of time. These latter groups of people have been traumatized by their bad experiences.

    In their book, “Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma,” Levine and Frederick (1997), said that this is a result of bottled-up somatosensory symptoms emanating after trauma. There are three main ways people respond when faced with a traumatic experience, said Levine and Frederick (1997). They can fight (confront the situation), flee (get away from the situation), or freeze (be totally overwhelmed by the predicament to the point of immobility). Victims who apply a fight or flee solution to a traumatic experience fare better in dealing with trauma than people who freeze in response to shock (Levine & Frederick, 1997). This state of suspended animation and paralysis occurs unconsciously and involuntarily. During this state of freeze, the victim has no way of going through all the typical reactions associated with traumatic events (Levine & Frederick, 1997). Because they are not adequately discharged by the victim, the trapped emotions wreak havoc on the traumatized individual.

    The solution to trauma is, therefore, to guide the victim along a path (Experiential Sensation-FELT SENSE) that allows them to perceive and release those trapped emotions (Levine & Frederick, 1997). This approach to healing trauma was garnered by learning how animals recover from traumatic experience (Levine & Frederick 1997). Confronting trauma, said Levine and Frederick (1997), should be mostly on an emotional, limbic brain level, and not solely on the rational, executive brain level.

    Levine and Frederick’s trauma theory is also supported in some ways by the polyvagal theory, which suggests that trauma has a somatic experiential component. If, as indicated by the polyvagal theory and by the Levine and Frederick (1997) theory, that trauma has strong emotional roots, one can apply elements of relationship models such as the DIR model in addressing trauma. After determining the victim’s functional emotional development capacity level, a DIR practitioner can begin to appeal, build and strengthen discovered areas of weaknesses, thus allowing the victim to escape the shackling phenomena of a past traumatic event. Calming the traumatized individual is a tool in the DIR toolbox with which to regulate traumatized individuals. A calmed mind creates an opportunity for further regulation of emotions and understanding of deep-rooted feelings, all of which are needed for trauma victims to extricate themselves from the shackles of the past and begin to attain new heights of functional capacity.

    Other applicable trauma theories include the NARM model, which, focusing on the mind, suggests that trauma is associated with a maladaptation in the victim’s attachment history. The PTSD model suggests that trauma victims are applying to their current problems solutions which had worked and were appropriate in the past.

    In my opinion, while attachment and trauma appear as opposite ends of the same emotional realm, it is apparent that whereas attachment is mostly positive, except, for example, in cases of extreme attachment/dependency, trauma is almost always negative, at least until it resolves. Treatment of trauma requires a dedicated practitioner, who is ready to learn from their victims and understand their challenges in order to develop an appropriate management strategy.

    Recognizing the signs and symptoms of trauma, making timely referrals to a trauma specialist, and integrating several of the modalities mentioned would likely give the best result in the management of traumatized children and adults.

    Reference

    Levine, P. A., & Frederick, A. (1997). Waking the tiger: Healing trauma: The innate capacity to transform overwhelming experiences. Berkeley, CA: North Atlantic Books.

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    Source by Anselm Anyoha

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