Tag: Setting

  • Terminal Wealth Dispersion, Life Expectancy and Individual Retirement Accounts

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    Terminal wealth dispersion is the technical term that describes the variability of the future value of investment portfolios. This inevitable variability means that no one knows what the value of their investment portfolio will be when they reach retirement age or at any time during their retirement. And the uncertainty of individual’s life expectancies compounds this problem.

    Hedging against the risks associated with these two factors places an onerous burden on individuals. Although this hedging could result in a very comfortable retirement, if one can afford the hedge and their timing is right, the potential downside risk is so great that it may be deemed unacceptable by many individuals. So one has to ask “Do individuals really prefer to forgo a sure but modest retirement income and play the odds with their retirement savings in hopes of being very well off in retirement?”

    With individual accounts, individuals lose the benefit of the pooling of risks. The two risks that force individuals to over-save are investment risk and the risk of living beyond the average life expectancy. In both cases the outcomes, terminal wealth and life span, are highly variable. When the risks are pooled for a large number of individuals over many overlapping life spans, the average outcomes are highly predictable, which is what makes traditional pension plans work so well.

    Traditional pension plans exist, for all intents and purposes, in perpetuity. This being the case, they can build reserves during good times in the financial markets and weather the bad times, thus enabling them to make consistent payouts to retirees regardless of the timing of their retirement. Unfortunately, individuals do not get to choose their holding periods or the years of their retirement and must take whatever comes along, and what comes along might be good or it might be bad. Thus individuals must set savings goals that are sufficiently high to hedge against the risk of the average return of an investment portfolio over its holding period falling well short of that which would be expected very long term.

    The relatively short duration of individual’s holding periods leave them very susceptible to the effects of market cycles, which are notoriously unpredictable in amplitude and frequency. Being broadly diversified mitigates this risk but does not eliminate it, as it’s entirely possible for a worldwide bear market to occur during one’s holding period. Then at the end of the holding period for wealth accumulation, a second holding period begins, which will be the term of retirement, and this second holding period carries the same risks as the first, but at a time in life when there is no source of income to make up for portfolio under-performance.

    The other component of risk that individuals must hedge is the risk represented by the uncertainty of one’s life span, which means that individuals must aim even higher when setting their savings goals. The managers of large pension plans can depend on retirees living on average for only the average life expectancy of employees who reach retirement age. The average life expectancy for someone who reaches the age of 66 is currently 82 years, and 66 is currently the age when workers are eligible for full Social Security benefits, which makes it a reasonable baseline. Based on those assumptions, the average term of retirement would be 18 years and pension plans should only have to be funded to the extent necessary to cover the cost of this average term of retirement.

    Individuals, however, don’t know how long they’re going to live, so they must over-save to ensure that they don’t run out of money before they run out of time. This need to over-save is independent of the first need, thus the need to over-save is compounded, i.e., an individual needs to save enough to cover the cost of living well beyond the average life expectancy and the targeted amount of savings at retirement age must be great enough to ensure with a reasonably high level of certainty that the actual amount on hand at retirement is at least the bare minimum necessary to get by on.

    A popular estimate of the term of retirement for which individuals must plan is 30 years. Saving enough to cover the cost of a 30-year retirement is a much greater burden than saving for an 18-year retirement, but planning on a shorter retirement exposes individuals to tremendous risk. It also exposes taxpayers to tremendous risk, as individuals who outlive their savings will undoubtedly require some form of public assistance to make ends meet and are likely to become wards of the state when they become physically incapable of caring for themselves.

    An individual who bases their retirement saving on living to the age of 96 but only lives to be 82 will have forgone a lot of pleasures in life, such as travel, fine dining and better vehicles, that they could otherwise have enjoyed. But many individuals just don’t have the level of income required to support the saving rate necessary to amass the wealth required to hedge against the downside of terminal wealth dispersion and the possibility of living well past the average life expectancy. For them it’s not a matter of forgone consumption, it’s a matter of going through life with the knowledge that they are likely to spend their golden years living in abject poverty and that that will be their reward for 40 or 50 years of hard work. And it gets worse!

    Some economists now believe that within 15 years or so, given the current rate of health care inflation, 100% of Social Security benefits will be spent on medical expenses: Medicare Parts B and D premiums, copayments, uncovered expenses and medigap insurance premiums. If that becomes the case, anyone without substantial savings or a defined benefit pension will be looking for public assistance the day after they retire. Although this is probably a worse case scenario, there is a general consensus that individuals retiring today will need to set aside approximately $180,000 for medical expenses not covered by basic Medicare.

    With the situation already at this state, adding private Social Security accounts to the mix would be like throwing gas on a fire, as individual Social Security accounts carry the same risks as other individual retirement accounts. Those who have tried to kill Social Security since its inception find private accounts very appealing. But, not so coincidentally, most of them seem to be in the enviable position of not needing Social Security to support their retirement. More recently, younger workers, too, have come to oppose Social Security, but not for the same reason as the traditional opponents. Young workers may be crushed by the growing burden of Social Security and may never receive any benefits from the system. Those who oppose Social Security simply because it’s a social program should be expending their efforts on reforming it rather than killing it.

    If Social Security had been managed like a pension plan rather than the ilconceived system it is, with today’s workers paying for yesterday’s workers’ retirement, its current situation wouldn’t be so dire. Indeed, it might very well be a fully funded, functional system. CalPERS and other large public employee retirement plans have operated successfully for decades, with success being defined as being able to meet their obligations, not having an adverse effect on the financial markets, no scandalous events attributable to malfeasance by the plans’ sponsors and being free of influence from elected officials. There’s no reason that Social Security can’t also be managed in such a manner. It would literally take an act of Congress to do this, but the hardest part for Congress would be letting the system run without their interfering with its operation.

    Passing off the burden of retirement to individuals was a great deal for corporations but it’s a very poor deal for most individuals, and extending individual accounts to include the Social Security system would only make a bad situation worse. It’s not a poor deal for all individuals because there will be some who can afford to save a substantial portion of their income and whose holding periods will coincide with bull markets, thus putting their wealth in the upper range of their terminal wealth dispersion, and who also live a long, healthy life. They will be the ones who benefit from over-saving and living beyond the average life expectancy, but they may end up forfeiting a portion of their wealth in the form of taxes to support the less fortunate. I don’t believe that is what the public expects from a well-conceived system.

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    Source by Mike Kennedy

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  • The Renegade Network Marketer is Attraction Marketing

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    In case you have not read the eBook by Ann Sieg called The Renegade Network Marketer, be sure to get your copy here. By reading this book you will learn new concepts on how to build your Network Marketing business or any business the smart way in this digital age.

    Inside Sieg’s book she targets a distinct group of people that are discouraged that their Network Marketing business is not going as planned. Every single day this group searches the internet for solutions and the Renegade Network Marketer provides the answers. Ann has exposed the upline sponsors for the ever tiring methods and myths that they are teaching to new recruits. If you have grown weary of hitting on or have just plain run out of friends and family this system is perfect.

    The Renegade Network Marketing eBook is full of valuable and practical information on how to prospect, market, and sell, specifically in the Network Marketing industry by using the internet. Even if you don’t belong to a Network Marketing Business, you can still purchase The Renegade Marketing System eBook and still make money as an affiliate.

    A new doorway has been opened by The Renegade Network Marketer which is leading the way to working smarter in attracting targeted prospects into your network marketing funnel. You will learn how to how to qualify prospects, position yourself as an expert and how to make your internet marketing efforts count. In order to keep you ahead of the trend in professional network marketing, there is ongoing continuous training. Whether you are just starting out or you just want the know how to grow your business this marketing concept is flawless.

    Cash flow is vital to any business and Sieg has also incorporated in her system the opportunity to make multiple streams of income. When you purchase the e-book you also gain access to a Back Office with a huge amount of information and tools to market and track your new business. Once you’ve read the book, you’re ready to get started setting up your own attraction based marketing system.

    The difference with being directly linked to Ann is that she has an incredible team and system in place. This is backed up with free membership in the Renegade System where you can put what you have read into practice right away. You’ll find many other helpful resources at The Renegade System website such as website development, copy writing and traffic generation.

    Ann has taken attraction marketing to a whole other level by teaching the principles of marketing. The ideas I got from the book suddenly opened my eyes to see network marketing business in a totally new light. The path in front of me has never look so bright. In our lifetime as network marketers we have no doubt made several attempts at making money did not go exactly as planned. Would you agree that those attempts in question had to do with the number of people that didn’t find your network marketing business as attractive as you did?

    In a nutshell, The Renegade Network Marketer eBook renders a complete Internet attraction marketing system for network marketers at a very low cost. The book comes risk free with a money back guarantee. This kind of training which is always being added could very easily cost thousands and I am sure somewhere it does. If learning the highly coveted secrets on how to attract and qualify prospects instead of chasing them down appeals to you then this eBook is for you.

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    Source by John Kellerman

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  • Advantages of Group Dating

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    Group dating is very popular in Japan and it is also known as ‘compa’ and ‘gokon’. Group dating is slowly becoming very famous in other countries also because through group dating people can easily find a suitable partner. The concept of dating in a group is very unique and different. In this system a girl and a guy who know each other from before plan a date in which each of them get 4 to 5 eligible friends. This date can be held in discos, bars, restaurants and hotels.

    So now let us discuss the most advantages of a dating in a group. These advantages will help you to understand this type dating in a better way.

    1. Socialize in group in a much better way
    As a group dating system involves trustworthy peers people can socialize in a much better way with each other. Group dating helps a person to learn from one another’s experiences. This type of dating involves a group of trusted teens who go out together in a group rather than in couples. Every parent want their kids to be in good company and influence, this type of dating helps them in this matter.

    2. Group dating helps in observing the opposite sex
    Teenagers are often interested in the opposite sex, but they are too scared of rejection. But in this type date setting, teenagers of genders can get to know each other very well. In this setting, every person can keep an eye on his or her friend, this helps in creating a better bond between friends and siblings.

    3. Can get acquainted with each other very easily
    This type of dating is most appropriate for those people who like some one but are not able to express their feelings. By becoming a part of this system they can get to know more about the person they like or love. Through group dating they get confidence and can face rejection more easily and boldly.

    4. No risk of temptation
    Having fun and getting to know each other are two main features of a group date. Kids involved in this type of dating are much better behaved because they want to impress each other. They avoid doing things that can harm their friends. Temptation is reduced to the bare minimum because kids are in the company of trustworthy friends.

    5. No pressure of impressing any one
    The main advantage of this type dating is that even if you do not manage to find a partner, you can still enjoy the outing or party with your friends. In a group dating even if you do not find a compatible partner you can still have a pleasant time, because you do not need to impress a particular person.

    These are the most important advantages of this type of dating system.

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    Source by Jessica N King

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  • Understanding the Laws of Success – Law of the Farm

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    Success does not just happen; it is the result of the application of laws that have been proven over time. From the days of the Roman Empire, these laws have been shown to work. The key is to understand these laws and to work with them, not against them. One such law is the Law of the Farm.

    The Law of The Farm

    The Law of the Farm is based on observation of the world around us, namely the ability of a farmer to raise crops. The Law of the Farm says that success comes from the same process that a harvest comes to a farmer. First, as a farmer plows the ground, the person must be readied for success. The weeds of negative thinking must be cleared away, and the person must be fertilized with thoughts of abundance and possibility. Second, the seeds of success must be sown; these are the actions the person does to generate success. Those actions must be tended, supported by positive thinking, just as the farmer tends his crops. Then, when opportunities arise, they must be harvested, just as the farmer must harvest his crop. The harvest must be done at the right time, in the right way. Just as the farmer can lose his crop if he lets it sit in the field, so the person can lose success if he does not take advantage of the opportunities when they arise in the fullness of time.

    Preparing the Field

    For the farmer to reap a harvest, he cannot simply scatter seeds in a field. The field must be plowed, fertilized, and otherwise prepared before the seed is planted. For some crops, these may take years of preparation; as Stephen Covey points out in his book, “The Eight Habit”, a potato farmer must prepare his field for two years prior to planting. People must be prepared for success the same way. They need to have the weeds of negative thinking cleared away. They must be prepared for the planting by learning the attitude of expectation of success. A person must be fertilized with thoughts of abundance so that the seed has food to grow.

    Planting the Seed

    The farmer plants the seed of the crop he wishes to harvest. He does not plant corn seed to get a harvest of wheat. So, too, a person must plant the seeds of what he wishes to gain. This is where goal setting comes into the process. The person needs to decide what his goals are, and then create a plan for reaching those goals, so that he can plant the right seed for the desired harvest of success. A person wishing financial success must plant financial seeds, whether these be investments made or skills learned. The person must understand how the seeds being planted will grow to the desired harvest.

    Tending the Crops

    While the crop is growing, the farmer needs to tend and protect the growing plants. The field needs to be watered, treated to prevent insect infestation, fenced to protect the young plants from animals who would feed on the crop. A person working towards success must also protect his crop. Positive associations are needed to continue the growth of the ideas plants. Negative people and negative ideas must be protected against. Learning about himself and his endeavors (books, classes, further reading) can fertilize the ideas, making them grow stronger and faster. Persistence is needed to weather the storms of depression and impatience which can threaten the crop of success.

    Harvesting at the Right Time

    The farmer needs to gather in the crop when the time is right. He cannot do it too early, or the crop will not be useful; he cannot do it too late, or the crop will destroy itself in the field. A person working towards success needs to realize when the opportunities arise so that the efforts planted can be realized at the right time. Hesitation can cause the opportunity to rot away; the attempt to reach the absolute maximum can cause the right time to slip by. Act when your subconscious says to act; by listening to the small voice within you, you will know when the harvest time has occurred. The farmer doesn’t wait until the absolute peak ripeness occurs; he harvests the crop just before then, so that the ripeness will occur when the harvest is delivered. So, too, a person needs to act just before the maximum results, so that the results can mature during the act of harvesting. Particularly when it comes to investments, it is better to get 95% of the profit by acting early than to get 80% of the profit by acting too late.

    The Most Subtle of the Laws

    There are several laws of success, but the Law of the Farm is perhaps the most subtle. Just as a farmer gets better at raising crops as the years go by, so too a person gets better at using this law as he works it. Of all the laws, this one gets better the more you use it.

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    Source by John Steely

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  • Addiction To Unrequited Love

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    The Torchbearer – S/he will love me one day

    It sounds silly for one to be addicted to unrequited love, but it can sometimes be the result of growing up in a household where love was either conditional or not consistent. As a child, the “torchbearer,” may have been always trying to win the love, praise or affection from a parent (or someone else influential) who was unavailable, abusive or failed to provide proper nurturing…. or the child could have witnessed one parent in a sort of unrequited love relationship with the other and could have taken that energy on. If it wasn’t an issue of childhood environment, then possibly some sort of other trauma occurred to upset the torchbearer’s self-esteem and their ability to feel safe receiving love. It can also result from a sudden and unexpected separation, betrayal, health, or appearance issue.

    At an existential level, the torchbearer may have developed a belief that they are not worthy of love and they may find themselves attracted to love situations that seem to keep them stuck in this dynamic: loving someone, but not able to fully receive love back. Although the person feels unworthy of love on some level, often they know they are worthy on another level, which the torchbearer then may become confused as to why they stay addicted to an unavailable person. The relationship then becomes about fantasy, idealization, avoidance, or a love-hate relationship ensues where the addict both loves and disapproves of the object of their devotion.

    According to love addiction expert Susan Peabody, the main categories of love addictions include:

    • obsessed love addicts: obsess and can’t let go even if their partners are unavailable or abusive
    • codependent love addiction: needy to please partner for sense of self
    • narcissistic love addicts: take advantage of their partner and can act disinterested, selfish or abusive and yet still feel addicted to partner and can’t let go
    • ambivalent love addicts: this category includes unrequited love addicts (also known as “torch-bearers”), saboteurs, seductive withholders, and romance addicts. The main goal through this kind of love addiction is the avoidance of true deep emotional intimacy and bonding. These addicts crave love and affection, but are afraid to get too close at the same time.

    Unrequited love addicts are part of the category of Ambivalent Love Addicts. Susan Peabody was the first to create the term “Ambivalent Love Addiction”. Her book “Addiction to Love: Overcoming Obsession and Dependency in Relationships,” is an amazing book for anyone wishing to learn more about love addiction.

    To be an ambivalent love addict, or torchbearer, means that one deeply craves love, intimacy, commitment, and unconditional love. However, at the same time, one has fears of relating deeply to another person. Such love addicts can end up pushing love away or holding it at a distance. Subconsciously, it can feel much safer for these individuals to love someone who isn’t fully there or who doesn’t want a full-on commitment. Picking an individual who is married, committed to another, distant, a player, a saboteur, or a sex addict may act to help the torchbearer avoid a true relationship. Some torchbearers end up addicted to friends or colleagues and hope the relationship will become something more.

    With many of the torchbearers that I have read, I find there is usually an excuse to continue chasing the love interest. However, there is also always a counterproductive excuse for never letting the love interest know their real feelings. It is even possible that if the object of infatuation actually returned affection or expressed desire for commitment towards the love addict, the love addict might not crave the interest anymore. One popular excuse that I have heard reads something like: “getting what I wanted or asked for took too long, therefore I no longer trust the love interest anymore, so I no longer want a relationship.” Once the love interest gives up, separation anxiety sets in again. Why does this occur? An illusion has been broken and the person idolized has become more human and less of a challenge to the ego.

    The torchbearer runs the risk that even if they obtain the object of their desire they may not achieve the closeness or intimacy they desire unless they change why they were addicted in the first place. Sometimes the addiction simply changes. An addict may transform from a torchbearer into a seductive withholder. They can even start becoming a codependent love addict if the once unrequited love relationship begins to become real.

    So, how do you know if you are addicted to unrequited love?

    What are the symptoms? The symptoms listed below are not comprehensive, but ones I typically see with clients (usually women):

    • Do you obsess over or find yourself only attracted to love interests who are not available in some way or who are married, playing you, who are “just friends,” or have left you?
    • Do you fear communication or to let the person know your interest in them, feelings, and other basic questions for fear of rejection or to keep the fantasy going? Or do you find yourself communicating but unable to accept a lack of response or a non-commital response without hoping if you wait long enough you will be wholly wanted?
    • Do you suffer in silence while you hold adoration towards someone who doesn’t really know? Some unrequited love addicts pursue their interests opening and ardently, but others can hold torches for people who they will not let themselves get close to nor let themselves be revealed in any real way.
    • Do you expect your love interest to be psychic/empathic and to just know and interpret your feelings and needs, even though there has been no grounded communication? Are you living out your relationship psychically or vicariously through “signs” or empathic feelings that the other person may be thinking about you, even if there is no contact?
    • Do you find yourself always hoping and waiting for the other person to make an interest in you known?
    • Can you never feel “close” in a real way to the person you are holding a torch for?
    • Are you always living out the relationship in your head?
    • Are you continually asking yourself many questions, wondering about the other person feelings and intentions (or potential future intentions) without ever grounding anything to test to see if any fantasies are real?
    • Do you have other addictions, such as to sex, psychics, alcohol etc?
    • Do you feel you cannot let go of the love interest even though it is not making you feel loved? Do feel powerless to stop at will.
    • Is the preoccupation with this interest having a more negative affect on you spiritually, financially and other ways than positive? In the end, are you losing more than you gain?
    • Do you have a history of being hurt or obsessing on lack of love, attention or approval by a parent or someone else influential in your earlier life?
    • For those with less intense expressions of this addiction: are you confused why you only seem to attract or are attracted to unavailable people or people who are not 100% wanting a relationship? And with this, do you feel bored with people who are into you or once a relationship starts to develop? Does it seem that all the people who would be right and loving towards you, you cannot “fall in love” with?

    If you have an “interest” that you crave but are afraid to reach out to in any real and genuine way for fear of rejection, then you might be addicted to unrequited love. You may also be addicted if there is an underlying knowledge that expressing your wants and needs would not be appropriate. I’ve talked to many clients who are totally engaged with these types of interests, sometimes even sexually. But, usually they know on some level there are certain things they cannot ask/dare put forward cause the relationship is casual though they want something more. Though the “craving” is not always required, this article is mostly written for the hard core unrequited love addict.

    Here is an example of one kind of non-communicative unrequited love addict who does have some relationship and interaction with her love interest:

    A woman starts to like an attractive man. They meet and there is some flirting — the man seems interested to the woman. Information is exchanged followed by mixed signals that mark the relationship. The woman starts obsessing and fantasizing about having a relationship with the man. However, the man won’t make a clear move and the woman ends up doing most of the contacting to keep interaction ongoing. The woman acts casual because she wants the man to make his interest known first. She is getting some cues of affection and indication of interest, but it’s kept superficial and she is always unsure. This goes on for some time, sometimes months, and she starts thinking “Does this guy really want a relationship or am I just casual or a friend?” Despite feeling a sense of unknowing and distress, the woman will never risk asking to find out. She starts asking advice from other friends who tell her to forget about the man, but she hangs on in hope he will ask for a real date or commitment or show he cares.

    The man is simply not putting out vibe of wanting a full-on relationship. However, she starts to fantasize that maybe he is just scared, can’t communicate or is insecure. She fantasizes that he will start to be more demonstrative or want something more if she can just hang in or never upset the status quo. She even wonders, “should I say something or make a move”, but something inside is telling her it’s not safe to tell this person how she feels because they are not on the same page, so she withholds keeps holding a torch for this person. She finds out the man has started to pursue someone else and she feels upset and feels betrayed. But, still, she has never had clear indication they are in a “relationship.”

    In the worst cases of unrequited love addiction I have seen, the client is addicted to psychics, using spell casters to cast spells to make their love more available, or are even asking for healing sessions on the person they are addicted to hoping healing something in their love interest will change the reality of what is going on.

    What Can You Do If This Sounds Like You?

    Often, I see two main themes running in these relationships: fear of true communication (or fear of accepting a communication or lack there of), and fear of vulnerability & rejection. Many times I also recommend torchbearers learn how to set boundaries and how to respect others boundaries. If the torchbearer is holding on waiting for a “sign” or demonstration from the love object, afraid of giving up, learning communication would help with getting out of fantasizing a relationship and making it more real. In the least, the torchbearer can get closure, if the love addict’s desires are not reciprocated.

    Getting closure isn’t always an easy thing for a love addict. It is often considered to be a harsh rejection. Many frightened unrequited love addicts wish to avoid being hurt at all costs. However, with this cost, these love addicts avoid true intimacy and relationships.

    Most unrequited love clients I work with have a shut down throat chakra. They may have been raised or learned through some experience that expressing feelings or needs is a burden on others, a sign of weakness, inferiority or something to be afraid of. Codependent types are afraid to cause any sort of confrontation or rejection for themselves. However, the only way out is through. The crux is that this dynamic is used to avoid another hurt or rejection and this continues the cycle of avoiding true commitment, intimacy and bonding.

    Step 1: Communication With Yourself

    The first step is for the torchbearers to ask themselves what they truly want from a relationship. What is their vision of how they want to be loved and committed to? This step may be one of the hardest. The unrequited love addict may be so used to avoiding confrontation that asking them to figure out what they want and need seems strange. Torchbearers ask themselves “How do I get someone who doesn’t care to do so? How can I be better? More lovable?” Simply leaving an unrequited love may not solve the problem either. It may just transfer the love addiction from one of pursuing the unrequited love interest to holding a torch and suffering in silence while pining after the loss. They may remain stuck, wondering if maybe this person is still missing them or thinking of them and it gives them hope for reconciliation.

    Step 2: Communication With Your Love Interest

    If communication is possible to ask for closure, this is the next step. I recommend asking in direct ways and not just looking for “signs.” State what you want out of love and a relationship, and ask the object of your affection if they feel they will ever be able to give it. Risk hearing the truth and risk rejection. This helps break the fantasy and though may be incredibly painful, it is the next step towards risking true intimacy and attracting the right relationship and breaking through all the fears that prevent it from coming. The whole idea of love addiction is the belief that without love one is nothing. If one can risk losing love and still see themselves as whole, then one can start going into relationships with sense of self as a sole identity which another can complement, rather than feeling another will complete them.

    Fear of intimacy (getting to know someone deeply), commitment, communication, rejection, boundaries, and confrontation needs to be challenged. Love addicts can also seem like perpetual victims or trauma junkies. So healing the need to be a victim is key too.

    Taking on the challenge of learning to set boundaries, risk confrontation and rejection, to communicate ones wants and needs (and listening to another’s – which this might be the real fear) may seem overwhelming. But, it is the only way out. All of this should be targeted, in addition to working on childhood issues, which implanted some of these fears and patterns.

    Step 3: Accepting What Is Communicated Back or Any Lack Of A Response

    Sometimes, the love addict at this stage may have been totally clear with their love interest what they want and they still feeling or receiving mixed signals. The person of their infatuation may be ambivalent, stringing them along, or afraid to just be honest and give them the closure they need. Sometimes there may be a lack of response — ie: an email is sent to the love object who appears to be avoiding sending a response back. In these cases, aim for setting a boundary for yourself on how long you will wait for what you need and stick to it. Be willing to recognize when you need to either end a relationship or at least bring it down to a more casual and detached level while you pursue other options.

    For those who find they are always making clear what they want and are still waiting to receive it or feeling unheard, the lesson may be in knowing when its time to stop voicing your needs and wants realizing they will not be met or cared for. Just affirm to yourself as much as you can that you can and are willing to find someone who can meet your wants and needs.

    Step 4: Changing and Challenging One’s Views on Love

    I also recommend changing how one views love. There is something self-absorbed in all the withholding and holding on. It is focused on fear and self-protection instead of love or generosity and true interest in another person and their needs and feelings. Many love addicts actually fool themselves into thinking their co-dependence is proof that they are being more loving than anything else. However, love is about extending and exposing oneself in the face of rejection and providing a safe and open place for someone else to extend and expose themselves. Love is not manipulative, wanting to change people or situations or waiting for such situations or people to change.

    Love is not about being a martyr either. If you can’t take a risk to know anyone else or have them tell you their wants and needs, or accept or listen when they are not on the same page, how can you expect someone to care and listen concerning your own wants and needs?

    Not all unrequited love addicts are afraid to state their wants, needs, and boundaries. But, often what can happen is the torchbearer is always stating needs and boundaries and they are not listening to what is being conveyed back. They keep hoping the love object will change, mature, or outgrow his detached stance.

    A Few Self-Help Healing Tools

    While one can always benefit from professional therapies, coaching, and alternative healing sessions geared towards transmuting thought patterns, there are a few healing tools that can be used to assist recovery from love addictions (feel free to look for others as I only mention a few here).

    If one has ever used “flower essences” before (a form of homeopathy), Australian Bush Flower Essences (www.abfeusa.com for more information) has a “Relationship Essence” which contains the following:

    • Boab: helps bring change, helps clears negative core patterns that are rooted in family and which are inherited. Can also help clear negative lines of karma that exist between individuals and past life influence.
    • Bluebell: is for those who cut themselves off from their feelings and helps to open the heart and to disolve greed and rigidity. Emotions are present but withheld and there is even fear of expressing positive emotions such as joy and love, etc through operation of fear that there is just not enough and they can’t survive if they let go of all they hold onto.
    • Bottlebrush: helps one to resolve mother issues and helps one embrace major life changes. It brushes away the past allowing individuals to move on and go forward.
    • Bush Gardenia: helps one to renew passion and interest in relationships. Helps with intimacy, and resolving where there is too much self-interest or lack of awareness in a partnership.
    • Dagger Hakea: Is for helping on to release resentments, bitterness and grudges.
    • Flannel Flower: is for those who fear emotional or physical intimacy, getting too close and who have a hard time maintaining personal boundaries. Helps one to garner trust to express ones innermost feelings.
    • Red Helmet Orchid: Helps for resolving father issues, probelms with confrontation or authority.
    • Red Suva Frangipani: Is for the rocky relationship that is challenged and is also for resolving deep sense of loss and sadness when a relationship is in trouble or has ended. Helps to heal that feeling of Wedding Bush: Is for issues with commitment to a relationship, job, goal etc. It can be used for individuals who tend to flit from one relationship to another, or for those who leave relationships when the crush phase or initial attraction has diminished.

    A book I highly recommend is Addiction to Love: Overcoming Obsession and Dependency in Relationships by Susan Peabody (co-founder of LAA).

    Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) is another tool that can help with love addictions. EFT can be easy to learn for free from demonstrations on YouTube or free downloads on various sites.

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    Source by Mandy Peterson

    Views: 0

  • What Is Wealthy Affiliate?

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    Wealthy Affiliate is an online community membership site founded in 2005 by two online marketers Carson and Kyle. It has become the number one community for creating and growing a successful online business.

    Wealthy Affiliate is a training website with a massive online community who engage with one another and offer help and support.

    Who Can Profit From Wealthy Affiliate University?

    Wealthy Affiliate (WA) makes the program available for everyone, including those who don’t have enough money to pay high prices for training or have a limited budget. WA offers instruction for people with different skill levels, from newbie’s up to experienced marketers.

    People Who Can Benefit From WA:

    Internet Marketers

    Local businesses and companies

    Online merchants

    Local marketers

    People that want to build their own website(s)

    People that want to sell their products online

    Retired people, looking for an extra income

    Individuals looking for a trusted hosting platform

    Students

    People who want to turn their hobby into an additional income

    Bloggers and website owners that want to improve their web sites

    Artist/Bands/Musicians Churches and Non-Profits.

    What Wealthy Affiliate Is Not?

    WA is not a “get rich quick” scheme. WA IS NOT AN MLM program and you do not need to build a massive down line to make money from the program. There isn’t a prerequisite to sell WA itself. You will not get rich overnight, unless you are a skilled marketer. The platform will teach you how to make money online.

    It will help you to build a solid online business that will endure for a long time, along with live support that you will need to soften the notion of doing it alone.

    How much does it cost to join Wealthy Affiliate?

    Wealthy Affiliate Starter Membership – Free.

    Premium Membership – $47 month or $359 yearly.

    If you upgrade to the premium membership within 7 days your first month access will only be $19.00

    Wealthy Affiliate General Overview

    There are several types of training that are available to members and it has everything from email marketing, list building, SEO, PPC marketing, article marketing, website development and technical training. The database has more than 300 teaching lessons and each month more resources are added.

    The training is attuned to suit every ones needs and includes:

    Video training

    Tutorial Training

    Classrooms on specific topics

    Question and Answers

    Live weekly training classes

    Task based Courses

    Participate in interactive discussions

    Why Do You Need WA?

    Affordability – Usually when people see all the upgrades or up-sells for different products or services, they automatically enter a negative mindset because they know that if they do not earn quickly, they will lose a huge sum of money. Most people start on a small budget and simply cannot afford to pay for expensive advertising or constant upgrades.

    Wealthy Affiliate has a free option and members can experiment with the program without any obligations, especially if they are not sure about the direction they want to take in the online marketplace. The premium membership is at a fixed rate and that gives members the freedom to work on a budget without having to be concerned about working harder just to upgrade to another level.

    All in one platform – To become successful online, we all need more services like hosting, a blog or website, content and various tools to run our businesses successfully. These services and tools can add up to a costly amount when you put it all together, and new as well as existing online entrepreneurs struggle immeasurably to keep up when they don’t earn from the internet quickly. Wealthy Affiliate has done a great job at adding the essential tools and services into one platform to get new marketers to get that critical head start.

    Website Builder and Hosting – WA allows you to use WordPress (WP) Express to build your own WP optimized blog and SiteRubix powers it. WordPress had become the most popular blogging platform with dozens of templates to choose from. You can choose to run the blog on a free siterubix.com domain or link it to your own. SiteRubix has a remarkable reputation and websites that are hosted on the service tend to do exceptionally well compared to other hosting companies.

    Coaching and Support – New online entrepreneurs are not able to get successful by themselves. If you have questions, they will get answered! The customer support is quick to respond and aids members with any issues that they might run into. Carson and Kyle are actively partaking along with members to answer questions personally. That alone shows the great amount of dedication they have when it comes to helping members.

    People who have absolutely no clue about earning an income online enter this marketplace on a daily basis and the World Wide Web has tons of “money-making” programs, products and tutorials that confuse new marketers badly enough and even cause a massive amount of people to fall into scams or empty promises.

    It has been proven that most successful online marketers had a mentor or support program that guided them into becoming successful. This is the best active community online and many methods to communicate are available like; a live chat box, questionnaire option, forum, active dashboard and micro blog communication.

    There is no negativity or judgmental behavior like we see in the public forums, only quality conversations. You will be able to network with like-minded marketers and meet countless people who will share ideas or support one another.

    Inspiration – Without motivation, it is hard to complete anything in life, not to mention starting up an online business. Wealthy Affiliate keep their learners motivated by setting up goals and then reward those who had met the goals by giving away something of value. For most people it is much easier to reach success when they have something to work towards that is worth the effort.

    Wealthy Affiliate will most certainly not make you rich and it will not make you successful. In the end the decision to take action will all be in your hands and no amount of training or support can replace free will. The law of sowing and reaping is how you will receive your harvest.

    What Is Wealthy Affiliate?

    Wealthy Affiliate is someone who unites with others of like-mindedness, on the terms of having and obtaining legitimate unlimited wealth.

    WA gives you all the building materials, but the rest will be up to you. Getting started is always the hardest part, but with the right motivation and positive attitude there is absolutely no reason to fail.

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    Source by Jamie Clay

    Views: 0

  • The Motionless Traveller by Author Aspi Doctor, a Spiritual Journey

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    The Motionless Traveller by Author Aspi Doctor

    I thought it fitting to play my Dalai Lama CD while contemplating the novel I have just finished; “The Motionless Traveller” by author Aspi Doctor. It assists in setting the tone while I attempt to articulate the many levels of knowledge woven in between the lines for the reader to catch or to just simply sit back and enjoy the ride. Yes, the Dalai OM’ing in the background of my concsious mind overseeing that this review is done with honour. I think he would approve.

    Aside from the fact that I am continually amazed at the phenomenal talent to be found off the beaten path of the big box book publishing houses and corporate monopoly distributors and retailers, who knew that this Northern Ontarian would be reviewing a such a ‘shining star’ from India.

    To have the gist of the novel, it is important to understand a bit of the man behind the words. Aspi was born in Bombay, India into a family of Zoroastrians and avid readers. He first demonstrated his gift for storytelling in primary school, to the delight of his classmates. Among the many other demands of a vocation within academia and in pursuit of his passion of the written word, Aspi studied English Literature obtaining a Masters Degree and Diploma in Journalism at the University of Bombay. Here Aspi was awarded the honourable prize of ‘First Standing’ in his subject group, and continued to explore many other dimensions of the wonderful world of literature in the Dramatic Arts and Theatre, Public Speaking and Radio Script Writing.

    In 1969, Aspi finally began putting pen to paper in earnest above and beyond his full duties as Principal and Academic of the Tolani College and the A.P. College of Commence, (affiliates of the University of Bombay). As a respected educator in his own right, he wrote and published a number of Text Books, such as; Business Communications-25 editions, Bank Correspondence-11 editions, Communications Skills in English-12 editions, Mass Communications-6 editions and more.

    In 1980, this calm, wise, insightful, mild mannered and ever smiling semi-retired professor began to put his wealth of knowledge into fiction format with “The Motionless Traveler”.

    A futuristic story that begins in Bombay India, in an era of post fossil fuel exhaustion and overpopulation with a bored government worker named Krish. Jolted out of his routine life when he rescues a young girl from a street gang, Krish inadvertently embarks on an adventure that spans the globe when he is gifted a ‘magical’ statue of the Buddha. Intertwined within the many levels of the story the reader gains glimpses into the Indian cultural mind with hints of Buddhism, Zoroastrianism, Spiritualism with some key Natural Law and Quantum Physics to ponder. Through the fine art of storytelling, we participate in Krish’s spiritual and metaphysical journey to a desert in Arabia, to Africa, to Mexico, to New Mexico, the United States, all to arrive at destination Canada. However, the true destination is to be continued long after the Buddha is handed over to a scientific research group, whose intent is to unravelling the statues mysteries amidst much intrigue as.

    Krish’s magical journey across oceans and continents brings thought provoking insights to the reader while he grows into new found power and understandings of the laws of nature and ultimately the evolution of mankind as a whole.

    As with all great teachings, the story is innately and humbly human while touching on the sacredness of the spiritual journey toward a collective and timeless God consciousness.

    Aspi continues to devote his so called spare time to his current writing endeavors which include another fiction novel entitled “Feet of Clay”. Several more text books are also in progress and pending publication.

    Aspi is currently the Vice President of the Association of College Principals in Bombay and an active member on the board of directors of two other educational institutions.

    I look forward to his next novel with anticipation of yet another spiritual journey filled with insights and the human condition. I am happy to recommend this work.

    Addendum: It is worth the time to peruse the http://www.ideaindia.com web site, a wealth of talented authors, good books, free e-books and articles covering many genres and topics.

    Reviewer:

    Jan Porter – http://www.inspiredsoulworks.com

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    Source by Jan I Porter

    Views: 0

  • The Making of a Multi-Million Dollar Insurance Salesperson

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    Every sales person or sales agent fantasizes about becoming a millionaire. This is how one individual became a Multi Million Dollar Insurance Salesperson.

    Over half the insurance agents recruited earn less than $50,000 before making a quick exist. So how do you make a million dollars, an then more? Especially when your career involves selling insurance? For me it was not by working 70 hours a week. No “get rich quick” insurance trade magazine article or ad inspired me. I don’t ever recall working with millionaire clients. In fact, in my case it would take a ton of policies to equal a million dollars premium collected, let alone commission earned. I never even received one of the over 90 insurance designations currently available.

    My case involved putting together a formula, that you could easily (with effort) mix to achieve similar or superior results. For me the ingredients were composed of four components.

    WILLPOWER I need to convince myself that I could achieve the insurance production goals I was setting. To begin, I purchased a collection of books on positive thinking. In them they emphasize phrases like “I Can” and “I Will”. I repeated these key word phrases over and over in my conscious mind, and saw some definite steady improvement in my sales achievements. Good but not good enough.

    Suddenly I was introduced to self-hypnosis and my insurance career instantly changed. This was not some occult form of hocus-pocus but sheer enrichment that builds and builds. It start with a client from England who was a professional hypnotist. I was intrigued, and he agreed to teach me how the subconscious mind automatically overrides the conscious mind. He then graciously taught how to easily hypnotize myself anytime I wanting. I programmed myself for success, and success followed.

    SALES SKILLS The so called selling skills insurance companies showed me, never really improved. I quickly saw that repetition of a bad habit is dangerous to your career. Now that my income was rising, I added another piece of dynamite to reaching sales goals faster. If I could double my closing ratio, it was simple to see my income doubling.

    I invested in the Dale Carnegie course for sales people. During this course I learned the steps that must be covered properly if you are going to expect a sale. What I did not expect was the announcement that passing the course required covering all the points in a two minute or less presentation. This is when I re-emerged a trait, I was not using enough.

    DETERMINATION I set myself a goal that surpassed just passing the course. Although there were around 25 people taking the course, I was determined. Not only was I going to pass, but my presentation would be voted the best of my fellow 2 dozen professional sales people. Needless to say, it took willpower, sales skill, and determination galore. Winning, gave me a feeling of floating sky high. After this I felt I could sell snow to an Eskimo.

    NO FEAR I have to admit, when I started selling insurance I was full of fears. It took the first 3 ingredients and one more step to prove to myself that I now had no fear. I had to do what few before me financially succeeding in trying. That was to make sales, by breaking the established rules, and doing what “experts” considered would only be done by fools. I would exchange my briefcase for a folder and yellow pad. My suit and tie would be reserved for funerals, and my dress code would be neat, yet informal. Now I was prepped for my no fear test.

    Without setting a single appointment, I opted to just knock on a prospects door, and do a simple presentation. I also programmed myself to act casual, using a “well, maybe you can’t afford it” approach if I had a closing objection. I knew most prospects have their conscious minds ready to be told they can certainly afford it. Using the opposite effect would alter their conscious thinking process.

    Starting on a Monday morning and working no evenings I wanted to test my abilities to the max. I started out well self-hypnotized and with about 50 prospect cards, some of them “leads”. Remember now, we are talking over 30 years ago. Without appointments I saw 25 prospects and made 30 straight sales of all sizes. Not a single strikeout. With over $20,000 premium and much of it in annual cash payments, I decided to stop with $12,000 in commissions. I had accomplished and achieved my goals in just four days. Yes, with a rounded effective formula you can put on the brakes.

    MY FIRST MILLION was then made very easily. For me, I proved I could become a millionaire, by breaking all the rules. My average policy size was not gigantic but my closing ratio was incredible. I did not wear a suit or tie or carry a briefcase. My cars were snazzy new Camaros and Mustangs, and I quit wasting time struggling to make appointments.

    There is one danger in programming yourself to achieve a certain goal. Since you are bound to achieve it, before applying self-hypnosis, ask yourself if it is good for your mind and body to do whatever it takes.

    To become a multi million dollar insurance salesman, do the opposite of most salespeople are doing. Develop your own prospecting methods, presentation sills, and closing tricks. It becomes much easier making an insurance sale when in your mind you have already done it, and have the acquired sales skills to back it up.

    I did it my way. You can too.

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    Source by Donald Yerke

    Views: 0