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  • My Husband Says He’s Miserable With Me and Isn’t Sure He Wants to Be Married – Insights to Help

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    Over the weekend, I received some correspondence from a wife who had noticed her husband acting cold and distant all weekend. He seemed to be picking fights, was clearly on edge and was showing body language and postures which indicated that something was very wrong. Of course, the wife asked him what was bothering him and he proceeded to answer with phrases like “nothing,” or “it’s just a bad day.”

    The wife was not happy with these responses and continued to press. The husband proceeded to withdrawal and act defensive. Finally, after the wife continued to follow him around and nag him, he angrily blurted out “can’t you see I’m miserable with you? If it weren’t for the kids, I’m not sure if I’d even want to be married to you.” The wife later regretted her response (which was to tell the husband that being married to him was no picnic either.)

    Later when they both calmed down, she asked him if he really meant what he said. The husband took a deep breath and said “I really don’t want to hurt you, but yes, I’m just not happy. I don’t know if it’s healthy for either of us to remain married.” The wife wanted my advice as to how she should proceed or act around him as he was clearly determined to sulk and complain. I will tell you what I told her in the following article.

    Determining What Responsibility A Wife Has In Her Husband’s Misery: The wife admitted that things weren’t perfect in her marriage. In fact, she had felt a distance growing in her marriage for some time. However, she would have never guessed that her husband was as miserable as he said he was. She suspected that he was projecting some disappointment and misery in other areas of his life and from his work onto their marriage.

    She may well have been right. This is actually quite a common occurrence. Much of the misery that he was feeling may not have initiated with her, but what was more important than it’s origin was the fact that he was equating his negative feelings with her and with the marriage. This may well be very unfair and even quite inaccurate. But, like it or not, this was her reality today and even she admitted that the marriage could use some improvement.

    So, while much of this may not have been her fault, there were certainly areas that she could address and improve. In a marriage that is working well, the spouse who is having issues with his job, his life, or his family will typically find solace and comfort in his spouse – rather than blaming her for the problem. The fact that he was doing just that indicated that there was a lot of room for improvement.

    So while the responsibility for the husband’s misery very likely did not lie totally with the wife, there was some opportunity to provide support and to let him know that she was there for him, willing to listen, and willing to help him in any way that she could – which is probably exactly what she would want for him to do if the roles were reversed.

    Beginning To Make Improvements In Your Marriage When You Husband Wants To Remain Alone In Being Miserable: When I explained some of these things with the wife, she was a bit resistant. She said that he was moping around so much that he might trip on his bottom lip. Granted, it can be hard to approach someone like this. But, she had pretty much been either ignoring him or trying to convince him either that he wasn’t as miserable as he thought, or that, if he was, this was his fault and not hers.

    Although this strategy is understandable, it’s not usually the most effective. The first step would be to calmly bring this out into the open and say your peace in a positive way that doesn’t continue to encourage or elicit his negative emotions. She might start by saying something like “I’m very sorry that you’re so unhappy right now. I love you and want for you to be happy. If there’s anything that I can do to help with this, I’m more than willing to do that. I can listen. I can offer support. I can make some shifts and changes if that’s what you need, but I can’t read your mind. Are you willing to talk about this so that we can come up with a plan to make this better?”

    I had no way to predict how the husband was going to react. I can tell you from previous experiences that some husbands will continue on with the negative act and say things like “it’s too late,” or “there’s nothing that you can do now.” Some men, though will begin to meet you half way even in the beginning. No matter what reaction you get, it’s very important that you respond in a positive manner. If they lash out, reply that you’re sorry to hear that and again offer your support. Eventually as you remain calm, supportive, and positive, it will become harder and harder to remain negative when you refuse to engage them.

    If they do tell you some things that might help, by all means meet them half way and do what you can to make things better. Although not all of this is your fault, it will only benefit both you and your marriage if you can lighten the tension, begin to identify and work on the issues, and to be the spouse that you would want your husband to be to you if the roles were reversed. If you can do this, it’s highly likely that all of the “ending the marriage” talk will begin to eventually lessen also.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

    Views: 0

  • My Wife Talks to Other Men – The Ugly Truth to WHY She Does This and What You Must Do to Fix It!

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    Are you unfortunate to be in a world where you’re saying my wife talks to other men, and don’t know what to do about it?

    That’s a terrible thing to witness and watch happen. I know it rips your heart out, and you want to end it fast.

    The truth is that YOU probably caused this, and that you can’t fix it by force, but only by changing some things about yourself.

    A Careful Understanding of Why You’re Stuck Wondering Why My Wife Talks to Other Men

    Here’s the deal with this problem of your wife talking to other men. We want to nip in the butt as soon as possible. But you unfortunately can’t go with your initial gut reaction of trying to stop it by force.

    But first let’s understand a couple of things about why this is happening.

    First off, if your wife talks to other men, then it’s likely that there’s something that she’s looking for that she’s not getting from you. Now that hurts to hear, but don’t worry because there’s a solution to the problem. It’ll take some work on your part but it’s only a few things that you’ll have to change.

    Second, your wife MAY be, if she’s doing this out in the open, trying to elicit a response from you. If that’s the case, then you’re still in trouble potentially but there’s a little more hope. Either way, we can fix this problem.

    What Your Wife is Missing and Why You’re Saying My Wife Talks to Other Men

    So the most likely cause of this problem is that your wife doesn’t see you as the man that she wants and actually instinctively and literally down to the core of her DNA needs!

    Therefore it’s more about what she’s NOT seeing in you, than about what she sees in these other men.

    What she’s not seeing in you are Alpha Male qualities, that each and every woman needs to see in order to be attracted to. Whether you’re in a nightclub, at the grocery store, in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, or MARRIED…the fact is that a woman must see you as a leader…an ALPHA MALE…if there’s any hope in her feeling attracted to you.

    A lot of men feel like it’s a natural thing for a wife to lose attraction to her husband after marriage, but the fact is that it’s up to you to keep the qualities that she’s attracted to.

    She needs a leader, someone who displays that they’re in charge. There are a few traits that you must possess for her to see you as that sort of man that I don’t have room in this article to go over.

    However, the overall picture is that if you’re saying my wife talks to other men, then she doesn’t see you as her alpha male, and if you become that she’ll have no more reason to look for it in other men at all.

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    Source by Jason T. Nelson

    Views: 0

  • What Not to Do to Cure Hemorrhoids

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    Are you causing your hemorrhoids to get worse? We always here what to do to take care of the problems associated with hemorrhoids, but do you know what not to do to Cure Hemorrhoids?

    Let’s face it, there’s not many things that are more embarrassing than hemorrhoids, and there’s probably not many things you wouldn’t try to get rid of them quickly.

    Lets look at some things that you could be doing that is causing your problem to get worse instead of better.

    Drinking coffee – It is agreed by a general medical census that caffeine intake during a problem with hemorrhoids doesn’t help. And the reason for this is caffeine stimulates the digestive tract. an increase in bowel movements during a flare up of hemorrhoids is not what we need.

    Smoking cigarettes – tobacco contains nicotine, and nicotine like caffeine stimulates the digestive tract. Smoking can also contribute to digestive issues that will slow the healing process of hemorrhoids.

    Sedimentary lifestyle – Our body’s need to be active. It is important that we get proper blood flow to all parts of our bodies, exercising at least twenty minutes per day is important for all ages.

    Stress – Being uptight and having tension in the body will contribute to the problems of hemorrhoids. Find ways to unwind and get involved in relaxing activities to reduce stress.

    Prevention is a lot easier than treatment, there are some simple things that you can do to keep yourself from ever suffering from hemorrhoids in the first place.

    – Eat a diet that is rich in fiber, this will keep your bowel movements regular and reduce constipation.

    – Drink the required amount of water for your body weight, this will keep our bodies well hydrated and less susceptible to the problems of hemorrhoids.

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    Source by Michael Varnado

    Views: 0

  • Your Doctor Says It's Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, Now What?

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    Hopefully you've been heeding my advice and you've gone to see your doctor about your hand pain. I'm going to guess that if he told you that he thinks you have carpal tunnel syndrome, he probably gave you a brace (or splint) and told you to come see him in a month. Hopefully he has referred you to a hand therapist or hand surgeon, and now you're just waiting to see what happens next. Don't panic. Once you understand what's involved, I think you'll feel a lot better.

    So, let's talk about that. What IS next?

    First of all, let's talk about what carpal tunnel syndrome really involves. Because if there is something that I've learned over the years, it's that people don't get a good explanation of what is really going on inside their hand. And as I always say, knowledge is power.

    Your "carpal tunnel" is a space in the base of your palm that is formed by several wrist bones and a thick ligament. Imagine it like this: Make an "O" shape between your thumb and your index finger. Now, hold your arm in a way that forces your palm to be facing the ceiling. The bottom half of the circle is a group of bones. The top half of the circle is a ligament. You've just created a mock-up carpal tunnel.

    Through that "tunnel", you have several tendons (that make your fingers bend) and one very important nerve that operates your thumb muscles and also gives you sensation to your thumb, index, middle, and part of your ring finger. Over time, if those tendons swell, they will crush the nerve against the wall (which is the ligament we talked about earlier) and that pinches the nerve, forcing it to stop working well. Usually, your first symptom is numbness or tingling, then hand pain at night, and eventually you start dropping things because your thumb is getting weaker (and you can't feel properly).

    This information is good to have so that you understand WHY the doctor wants you to wear a splint. See, when you bend your wrist in either direction, you pinch the (already irritated) tunnel more, which cuts off the nerve supply and makes your symptoms worse. The purpose of the splint is to keep your wrist "straight" so that the tunnel is as open as possible. Sometimes a splint is all you need to completely recover. Problem solved!

    Go ahead and make that "O" again with your thumb and index finger. Now leave a slight gap where your fingers should be touching. When a surgeon performs a carpal tunnel release, he is simply cutting that ligament in half so that it relieves the pressure that has been squishing the nerve. He does not remove anything. He just opens up the space so that your nerve can "breathe" again. Easy peasy! You will usually have to take it easy for a few weeks, and maybe spend another few in therapy, but after that, you are as good as new!

    See? That's not so bad.

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    Source by Aleks Dukinas

    Views: 0

  • How Does Relationship Building Techniques Build Your MLM Business?

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    Relationships are key in life, without them; life would be so boring. MLM marketing is based on creating strategic relationships between teammates and the audience of the individual business. This means that one has to work carefully to build trust and authority with the target market. By doing so with authoritative content and reliable timing, relationships will blossom and grow. Thus, creating a pipe line to send dedicated content towards motivated prospects. Failing to create elementary content not only discredits the publisher, but also kills all sales potential. Let’s open the door to relationship building techniques that will help.

    Create content that doesn’t sell but builds your reputation

    Never push content that sells, this is a horrible practice for MLM marketing. Create content that builds your business reputation up. This means promoting content that entertains or has a high level of educational value. There are so many businesses out that already overly pushes sales content, there is no need for you to do the same. Your marketing content is supposed to be attractive, not repulsive. This means every blog, article, eBook or landing page must educate through problem solving of some degree. There are ways to get sales, but to do so, one must push the agenda of their prospects first.

    To build relationships in MLM marketing, the content that is needed will vary. You will need basic content that covers a general situation to content that absolutely solves a specific problem. This is how you define your leads, by sharing all types of educational content. Your prospects will not always be in the same boat as the next person. So, to be effective, you must share content that targets symptoms first, then develop content that nails down some of the symptoms and then finally offer the cure through the final. The last content you can develop is the follow up content that offers advanced material to help the prospect go beyond the basic package.

    Specialize by focusing on your prospects growth

    Help your prospects grow in some fashion. This can be in life, or some other area that you have specialized skills in. In this capacity, your relationships are more specific and narrowed down in which the others in your area cannot touch. Lead by example, offer free and premium content for your visitors and subscribers. This will distract your prospects enough to keep them engaged. Not all of your content will be successful, so the smart marketer will always engage in analytics to help sort the weeds from the wheat and develop themselves and their content for the successful campaign. These techniques have enabled many new marketers to climb the ladder and enjoy an effective business.

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    Source by David L. Feinstein

    Views: 0

  • Can Your Migraines Disappear With Orthomolecular Medicine?

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    Quantum Brain Healing addresses the root of the migraine problem before recommending the treatment protocol. The root causes of migraine headaches include stress, poor diets, neurotransmitter imbalances, endocrine hormone imbalances, vitamin and mineral deficiencies, mineral level imbalances between calcium and magnesium, pineal gland malfunction, electromagnetic field imbalance, and emotional trauma. It is possible for a migraine to be a secondary illness where the primary disease is a brain tumor. Migraine headaches are an important symptom of a brain tumor. A brain aneurysm may feel like a migraine. Migraines may accompany ADHD, epilepsy, diabetes, Crohn’s, heart disease, irritable bowel, depression, and bipolar disease. A comprehensive look at your medical history and diagnostic testing must occur to rule out more serious problems prior to treatment.

    Migraine headaches can be caused by food and environmental allergens. Avoid nitrates, MSG, artificial sweeteners, and foods high in tyramines including red wine, cheeses, and chocolate. Stay away from carbonated beverages, soy, peanuts, pickled foods, non-organic coffee, chocolate, food dyes, food additives, or refined foods. It is very important include protein in your breakfast each day. Avoid all genetically modified foods and eat local or organic fruits and vegetables. Include fresh salmon, avocado, walnuts, almonds, and omega 3 and 6 essential acids in your diet.

    Identify allergens in your diet and avoid them with dietary changes including the G.A.R.D. Diet or the Elimination Diet. The Rotation Diet follows a different theory that allows exposure to each food once each four days. The immune system calms down when there is not frequent exposure to the allergen. Gluten may be a trigger for many people with migraines. Try to keep a food diary for at least one month to identify the foods that may be your triggers.

    Many people with migraines may experience problems with pollution and environmental triggers. These may be avoided or eliminated with hard work. Otherwise, this can be dealt with by reducing stress and improving overall diet and health. Stress may be improved by changing jobs, a divorce from an abusive one, a new job, a new hobby that you enjoy, volunteer work, and watching comedy on TV or at the movies. Stress can be reduced with Yoga, tai chi, and Qi Gong. There are several alternative therapies that can help migraines such as neurobiofeedback, hypnosis, homeopathy, and Bach Flower Remedies.

    Chinese Traditional Medicine (TCM) is great at improving migraines with patent herb formulas and liquid herbal extracts which can be used along with auricular laser therapy, auricular acupuncture, scalp acupuncture, and traditional body acupuncture. These therapies usually require two weeks to see improvement. The acupuncturist may recommend several months of treatments depending on how long you have experienced the migraines.

    © Dr R Stone, MD-India

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    Source by R Stone

    Views: 0

  • The Importance of Proper Sales Techniques

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    The success of any business can be directly related to the quality of its staff and the ability to meet any consumer demand. When your business struggles in this regard it helps to identify the areas of inconsistency which can result in the loss of consumers due to employee negligence. To avoid this unfortunate turn of events with your own company, it is necessary to identify the many factors influencing the importance of pursuing proper sales techniques.

    Factor I: Building Consumer Relationships

    One of the greatest mistakes amateur sales associates make is focusing on the drive to make a single sale form a single individual. This short sighted strategy may help in improving sales numbers in the short run but will provide no value with developing future success. The first factor influencing the importance of sales management skills is found with building consumer relationships overtime. Whether you run a store or an online website, pursuing a relationship with your client will help to secure greater sales as well as develop the best form of marketing, positive word of mouth.

    Factor II: Enhancing Selling Ability

    If you were to provide any employee with the opportunity to work with a consumer eager to invest in a product you will develop a high level of sales success. The true skill or value of an associate is to have the ability to work with consumers who may not have this interest yet still make a purchase after working with your employee. The selling skills of an employee staff often represents the financial success the company has displaying this factor of importance with enhancing selling ability.

    Factor III: Problem Solving

    When a customer discovers a problem with a good or service it is often easy to lose their business to a competitor in a short period of time. If a customer contacts your company with a problem it creates the possibility of salvaging your relationship by resolving the problem and enhancing consumer satisfaction. When your sales staff can utilize the sales management skills of problem solving it will boost your business success, marking the importance of this factor in relation to proper selling techniques.

    Factor IV: Revenue Development

    The final factor of importance identifying the need for proper selling skills is seen with the value of revenue development. Every business relies on the resources of revenue development so the elements of building consumer relationships, enhancing selling ability and efficient problem solving will all help in keeping consumers and meeting this high demand factor.

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    Source by Peter McKeon

    Views: 0

  • The 7-Point Trading Plan Template

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    One of the first things beginning traders are told to do is to create a trading plan that will spell out a trading strategy and a list of rules to follow in implementing that strategy. The only problem with that advice is that beginning traders don’t really have any trading experience, and thus are lost when attempting to craft a trading plan for their trading.

    Another problem with trading plans is that beginners are instructed to treat their plans as gospel and are told not to deviate from them. This prevents traders from adapting their strategies and rules to improve their performance, an essential step in every trader’s learning curve.

    Instead of a rigid document to be created early on in your trading career and never to be changed, you should instead view your trading plan as a living and breathing set of guidelines, capable of being modified as you gain trading experience. This article will teach you how to create a trading plan that will guide your trading efforts without stunting your progress.

    The 7-Point Trading Plan Template

    In creating your trading plan, here are the items you should include:

    1. Markets – What markets will you focus on? Be as specific as possible – if you’re trading stocks, what types of stocks will you concentrate on?

    2. Timeframe – How long will you hold your positions for? Will you be a day trader focusing on trades lasting a few minutes, or a swing trader holding trades for a few days?

    3. Time Period – What times of the day will you trade? You may have outside responsibilities that prevent you from trading an entire trading day. Pick which times of the day best suit your style.

    4. Trading Style – How would you characterize your trading style? Perhaps you are a momentum trader focusing on trending stocks? Or maybe you specialize in a particular sector? Again, this can and will change as you gain experience and learn from your results.

    5. Risk Management Rules – This is an absolutely essential and often overlooked component of your trading plan. How will you manage your risk, both on a per-trade basis and overall? You should have a “stop trading” point which is a fixed dollar amount that will force you to stop trading if you’re down by that much.

    6. Mentor – Who do you follow and learn from as a teacher? Attempting to learn trading all by yourself is not only lonely, but foolish as it ignores the hard-earned wisdom of other traders. You can either repeat the mistakes of other professionals and hope to eventually learn the lessons and techniques that they’ve learned, or you can simply learn from successful traders and bypass those initial frustrations.

    7. Learning Process – How will you structure your learning process as a trader? What steps will you take to ensure you’re always getting better? How will you structure your trading journal?

    Trading Plan Example

    To show you this trading plan template in action, I’m going to fill it out according to my own trading style:

    1. I trade the U.S. stock markets, focusing on volatile stocks with sufficient volume. These stocks are typically the focus of news items and are thus “in play.”

    2. I am a day trader and hold my positions anywhere from a few seconds to a few hours. I’m primarily a scalper and am looking to take advantage of short-term imbalances between supply and demand. I will stay in a trade as long as I can identify a supply/demand imbalance.

    3. I trade throughout the trading day, although I focus most of my activity at the open and close of the trading day.

    4. While I have multiple styles, I would characterize myself primarily as a momentum trader that relies on tape reading to identify favorable risk/reward situations to enter in the direction of a trend.

    5. I’m fanatical about managing my risk, both on a per-trade basis and overall. Every trade I enter has a predefined stop-loss and I have a daily stop-loss to stop trading when I’m having a rough day.

    6. I’ve had a variety of mentors throughout my career, and now I talk with a select group of traders at my firm with similar trading styles.

    7. I review every single trade I make, always looking for ways in which I can improve. This may be as simple as cutting down my risk when trading certain stocks or altering my execution patterns.

    Your trading plan can be as simple as that, just a series of statements answering those 7 questions. You also shouldn’t spend too much time creating your trading plan as it will frequently change throughout your career.

    Summary

    Your trading plan will crystallize exactly what you’re trying to accomplish, but don’t view it as set in stone. Rather, your plan will grow and change as you gain experience and develop your own trading style.

    Your trading plan also doesn’t need to be a complicated document spanning multiple pages. You simply need to define what markets you’re going to trade, how you’re going to trade them (how long you’ll hold positions, what times of day you’re going to trade, and your trading style), how you’re going to manage your risk, and how you’re going to continue developing as a trader. By clarifying and explicitly stating those 7 key points, your trading plan will serve and support you in your trading career.

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    Source by Matt A Nadell

    Views: 0

  • 5 Customer Survey Questions

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    Periodically, it makes sense to address your customer feedback mechanisms and receive some actionable, lived-experience insight into your operation’s strengths and weaknesses. Business leaders need to learn if the delivery of products, services, or other operational processes might be simplified. They need to know what customers would like to see more of. The smartest way to begin the customer feedback process is to decide what you want to know and what purpose that information will serve.

    Are you trying to develop new products or services, so that you’ll be able to give customers what they want before they know they want it? Or is business dwindling and you’re in damage control mode, attempting to win back customers? Some market research questions are best explored face-to-face with customers at a conference table with a leadership team member or two and maybe a front-line staff member present as well.

    Below are five draft survey questions for you to customize. Some apply to customers and others, to company leaders:

    1. What challenges or goals motivate customers to contact your business?

    2. What solutions to customer problems is your organization equipped to supply?

    3. What solutions are offered now? Might you add, re-tool, or drop any?

    4. What do customers most often hire you to provide or do?

    5. What do you (the business leaders) do next?

    Questions 1 and 4 pertain to customers. Questions 2, 3 and 5 refer to business strategy and should be addressed in-house, once you’ve spoken with two or more customers to figure out Questions 1 and 4.

    How you conduct the survey deserves some thought. It might be best for Solopreneurs and small business owners to convene a group interview that encourages comfortable and candid conversation. Larger companies might prefer to host a survey interview that’s facilitated by an outside market research firm.

    Question 1: What are the primary challenges facing (the customer’s) organization?

    Start with a “How are things going in your office?” question, or inquire about their next big project or objective (whether or not it would involve your organization). Find out what’s going on and let the customers talk.

    Questions 2 & 3: Which project or problem do you most want to take action on? How might that be done?

    Given your in-house expertise and resources and guided by the probability that the customer will contact your business to provide needed solutions, what additional customer projects might you be asked to take on (or what can you cleverly position your business to be hired to do)?

    Can your organization successfully deliver the desired outcomes of projects that are on your customers’ to-do lists? Can you discover how your customers are currently managing those challenges? Do your customers do business with any of your direct competitors? Do your customers have projects that are not getting resolved because s/he isn’t sure what to do, or there’s no budget to do the job?

    Question 4: Have our company’s solutions satisfactorily resolved customer needs or challenges?

    What projects have you been hired to do, or what products and services have been purchased by survey participants? What types of projects is your organization most often hired to do, or what are the best-selling products and services? How do customers feel about your company’s performance—is your ability to deliver services trusted and dependable? Do customers send referrals to your business? Does it seem that you could potentially receive more business from any of your customers?

    Question 5: What do you do next, based on customer responses?

    Here is the judgment call for you and your team. The success of the survey is in how you interpret the data received. What can your organization realistically do, based on the customer responses to Questions 1 and 4? Are there opportunities and strengths within your organization on which you might capitalize, as noted in questions 2, 3 and 5? What needs to be improved or discontinued?

    Within a week of the survey, tangibly thank your customers for participating. You may want to send a gift basket, or offer a 15% discount on their next order.

    Thanks for reading,

    Kim

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    Source by Kim L. Clark

    Views: 0