Global Digital Store – Ebooks and Softwares

Tag: Positive

  • What Is a Relationship Mission Statement

    [ad_1]

    RELATIONSHIP VISION

    Aligning values in relationships is a good thing to do intentionally. Think about how most people go through relationships. Does one person give up important values for the other? Is there conflict in the relationship? These things usually happen when values and beliefs aren’t talked about and don’t align with each other. Most conflicts in any relationship is due to differing values or beliefs. After all if we all agreed on what is most important there would be no need to argue. A Relationship Mission Statement can help!

    WE ALL COME FROM DIFFERENT BACKGROUNDS

    Think about how you grew up, your environment, money, food, school and so many other things. Did you partner grow up the same? Did your parents teach you different lessons regarding TV, meals, religion, or friends then you partner? We all bring expectations into our relationships but most likely they aren’t the same for each of us. So why do we think things are supposed to magically work out without talking about it, creating goals, or aligning values. Eventually if the bumps can’t be smoothed out then couples tend to search for someone like me. This is not a bad thing, seeing a professional can be incredibly helpful and restore the peace and longevity of your relationship.

    CHECKING IN WITH YOUR PARTNER

    For now let me provide you a simple way to check in with each other, communicate, and look at the future. Creating a Relationship Vision is a simple and helpful tool. It doesn’t take much time and can really target the lasting happiness of your relationship.

    A few steps to creating a Relationship Vision Sit down by yourself for about 30 minutes. Remember it doesn’t have to be done in one day.

    SIMPLE STEPS TO FOLLOW

    1. Go for the positive

    When brainstorming phrase things in a positive manner. For example instead of saying “we don’t argue” say “we will settle things calmly and peacefully” or “we trust each other” instead of “we won’t be jealous”.

    2. Write down your non-negotiables and desires

    Write down your “must-haves” such as “we will parent together” or “exercise is important” or “we will communicate openly and respect each other’s perspective”. You could also write things like, “going outside of our union is non negotiable”, “monogamy is of the utmost importance “, “attending church is a priority”, “traveling and experiencing the world with my partner is a high priority.” Make sure it’s not a laundry list for your partner, i.e. he mows the lawn and she does the laundry.

    3. Explore several areas of a relationship

    Since we have a multifaceted life it is important to address as many of these as you feel necessary. Expressing wants, desires, and values with sex, finances, lifestyle, parenting, career in-laws, leisure time and education are just a few of the things you may want to consider in You Relationship Vision. Answer questions about these topics such as what do I enjoy in my free time? How important are finances? Do I want to work full time? Do I need a 401k? What about insurance? Does my job need to provide this? What percentage or amount of time do we spend with in-laws? How do we allow them to interact with the children? Is sex satisfying? Do we want to explore new sexual ideals? Do the answers align with my values?

    4. Come together

    Come together as a couple and discuss the things you agree on first. Then Discuss what is negotiable and create short sentences expressing what is important to both of you. Leave the things that you don’t agree on for last. See if you can compromise on these issues if not this is where someone like me comes in. Having a professional help couples work through the hard stuff is helpful and will benefit your relationship for a lifetime.

    5. Come up with your statement.

    It doesn’t have to be long, complicated or directive. As a matter of practicality it’s better to make it succinct, covering the overarching theme of your intentions for your relationship.

    Examples

    We are co-creators of our lives, sharing a desire to love and be loved unconditionally, by consciously determining our behaviors and the outcomes we wish for ourselves and our family. We value respect, trust, non-judgment and self-control. We bring our best selves to this union, casting out destructive, egocentric motivations so that we may achieve the most positive and loving lifestyle we are capable of.

    We agree to always love and cherish each other and recognize how fortunate we both are; each of us consider ourselves the ‘lucky one.’ We build a healthy lifestyle together, where we support each other in getting exercise, eating well, having fun, resting and relaxing. We make all important decisions together, as a team. We don’t keep secrets from each other. We confide in each other and feel safe in each other’s care.

    We’re together to build a loving family and teach our children about healthy relationships. We create a sense of stability by having some routine but also make time for fun and spontaneity. We don’t intentionally hurt each other, but recognize we still do – and so we quickly and readily apologize. We take care of each other.

    6. Schedule a time

    Weekly, monthly, quarterly or whatever works for you, but make sure you come together to gauge if you are on track. This is the best way to ensure you both get your needs met and can address it if you’ve gotten off track. This will also provide space for growth. Since nothing in life stays the same, people, situations, events, or relationships, this provides room to renegotiate, change your Relationship Vision as the both of you change.

    [ad_2]

    Source by Roxanna Teeling

    Views: 0

  • Dousing the Flames of Marital Conflict

    [ad_1]

    Conflicts in marriage are endemic. Because this is a union of two distinct individuals each with his or her own likes, dislikes, prejudices and pet peeves, conflicts are built into the marriage packet. As the famous evangelist Billy Graham once said, “For a married couple to expect perfection in each other is unrealistic. The unblemished ideal exists only in ‘happily-ever-after’ fairy tales. ‘Happily incompatible’ is a good adjustment.”

    No human relationship can exist in a permanent state of happiness, and conflicts need not be viewed as a sign of instability or impending rupture of marriage. Couples need to master the art of quarreling constructively and resolving all conflicts positively. A mature approach will increase understanding and trust, and strengthen their relationship. However this depends on their level of commitment to each other.

    Areas of conflict:

    o Finance: In this consumer-oriented society of today, money or the lack of it can lead to conflict. Spouses have different spending habits. Overspending or unnecessary spending by one partner can upset the family budget, leaving less money for essentials. Entertainment, alcohol, consumer goods can eat into one’s pocket. Similarly miserliness will also trigger conflict.

    o When the needs, wants and desires of one partner are not met, there is a tendency to be irritable or argumentative over trifles.

    o Domination: When one partner is excluded from the decisions that affect them both, friction is bound to arise. Similarly, procrastination by one partner on issues that need urgent decisions can be annoying.

    o In-laws: Too much interference or over dependence of in-laws can become a bone of contention. Unfair references and comparisons lead to quarrels.

    o Children: Different styles of parenting or lack of proper parenting skills can result in heated arguments.

    o Sex: Husbands and wives have exclusive conjugal rights over their partners. Depriving a spouse of normal sexual activity creates tension in the relationship.

    o Working wives: Some women with high tech jobs may not have quality time to spend with husband and children. Stress, fatigue or overwork can sap them of strength and put them in an irritable frame of mind.

    o Habits: Drinking, smoking, gambling or drug taking are frequent causes of conflict.

    o Social activities. Time consuming parties or games leave very little time to spend with each other.

    o Physical and emotional abuse.

    o Self-centeredness.

    o Secrecy: Keeping important secrets from each other is a breach of trust.

    o Infidelity.

    The mark of a good marriage is not the absence of conflict, but how each partner deals with the problem. Conflict is like an ember with the potential to spark into a flame, and if not doused in time, can blaze into a conflagration. The foremost thing to remember is that it is not a battle between enemies. It is just a disagreement between spouses who have promised to love and cherish each other till the end of their lives.

    “Many marriages would be better if both husband and wife realize that they are on the same side,” says Zig Ziglar.

    The aim must be to diffuse the situation by proper resolution, so that it does not crop up again and again.

    There are two options available.

    1.The Negative Approach which will generate hostility.

    2.The Positive Approach which will make the bonds of marriage stronger.

    Negative Approach:

    – One partner personalizes the problem and treats it as an attack. Women are more prone to this approach. They withdraw into themselves and wallow in self pity. Withdrawal may be physical, sexual or emotional. Breach of communication follows. This is a dangerous trend. A trivial problem festers in the mind until it assumes gigantic proportions.

    – Angry reactions like yelling, crying, abuse, sarcasm, insults or even violence are disastrous. The idea obviously is to hurt the other person while defending one’s self in the blame game.

    As Broderick said, “Couples who vent their anger and do nothing to get at its cause and cure are committing marital suicide.”

    Positive Approach:

    1. Couples should never communicate when angry. They should first think things over calmly by themselves and then discuss the issue. Privacy is important. Discussions should not take place in the presence of their children or relatives, but in a quiet place where there will be no interruptions. They must bear in mind at all times that they are allies and not adversaries. There must be eye contact throughout the discussion. Respect for each other’s feelings is important. So the tone of voice and body language must be appropriate. Listening carefully to the other’s point of view is showing respect. Questions and clarifications are in order. It is also a time to share one’s genuine hurts and frustrations. Generalizations like ‘You always find fault’ or ‘You never listen’ are not helpful.

    2. The core issue must be tackled. It is important to define and discuss only the problem that started the conflict. Is the problem repetitive? Is there a recurring pattern? If so, why has the problem not been resolved before? There should be no deviation into unrelated issues. Old problems must not be dredged up and recycled to score a point.

    3. Finance can be a contentious subject. Bad financial habits must be mended. Budgeting one’s income is important. If expenses go beyond the budgeted amount, there should be a discussion on how best to make good the deficit. Honest conversations about purchases, savings and overspending will help. It might require lowering one’s standard of living or finding other ways of income generation.

    4. Sex is an important aspect of marriage. Withholding sex by one partner as a means of punishing the other, is hurtful. Sex enhances intimacy and reconciliation.

    5. Spouses must take responsibility for their contribution to the problem. They should be willing to change their behaviour if necessary. Owning up faults and admitting their weaknesses will diffuse tension. Sometimes it may even be necessary to give into the partner’s wishes, even though not fully agreeable. It is important to focus on what is right and not on who is right. Compromise is by no means weakness. It reflects strength and helps resolve the problem permanently.

    6. Forgiveness is the most important salve that will heal the hurt of conflict. Couples should be generous in forgiving each other’s faults. It may not be easy, but it is always better to get it over with and move on.

    Conflicts in marriage are inevitable. Fault finding and negativity can destroy and tear apart relationships. ‘Let not the sun go down upon your wrath,’ advises Scripture. With proper communication, tolerance and commitment, most conflicts can be resolved.

    As Alexander Perry said, “The ultimate test of a relationship is to disagree but to hold hands.”

    [ad_2]

    Source by Eva Bell

    Views: 0

  • 10 Characteristics of a Successful Entrepreneur

    [ad_1]

    For many people, entrepreneurship has become the job choice of the 21st century. That's understandable given the challenges and rewards of building a successful business. If you are considering entrepreneurship, you should begin the process by understanding the mental, psychological and behavioral characteristics needed for success.

    1. Positive mental attitude . This is arguably the most important of all the characteristics. You will never be a successful entrepreneur without a positive attitude. The one thing you can be sure of is that you will experience difficult times. Your success or failure will be determined at these times. If you maintain your confidence, persevere and continue to stay positive, you will be successful. Conversely, if you allow doubt and uncertainty to prevail, you will probably fail.

    2. Enjoy being around people . Being a successful entrepreneur means you will continuously interact with a diverse array of people such as customers, potential customers, colleagues, competitors, suppliers, lawyers, accountants and coaches. It really helps if you enjoy being around these people.

    3. Excellent communication skills . Communication can be defined as the accurate exchange of information between two or more parties. This is important because you will have many conversations. You need to be able to accurately exchange information in a fast-moving world using a variety of communication methods (eg, interpersonal, electronic). Of particular importance is the ability to listen and truly understand where another person is coming from.

    4. Have a need to achieve . Successful entrepreneurs are achievement-oriented. They value accomplishment and the intrinsic rewards that go along with achieving difficult goals. It is a strong motivator for most business owners.

    5. Resourceful . Most new businesses have limited resources such as money, information and time. Successful entrepreneurs figure out how to get the most out of these resources. They are masters at stretching a dollar and making a few resources go a long way.

    6. Objective . It is not easy to be objective about your business because you are passionate about making it successful. However, you do need to be impartial and dispassionate when it comes to making business decisions because emotion, bias and sentiment can result in poor choices.

    7. Committed . Building a successful business requires an absolute commitment. It takes a lot of work and there will be times when you become discouraged. It is during these times that you must be steadfast, faithful and committed to your vision.

    8. Dependable . This should go without saying but I will say it anyway. There is a strong positive relationship between your perceived level of reliability and the success of your business. No matter what type of business you have, your customers expect you to be dependable.

    9. Proactive and not reactive . Successful entrepreneurs anticipate problems in advance and deal with them before they occur. If you simply react to problems and issues as they arise, you may get overwhelmed.

    10. Possess technical skills and knowledge . Every business requires unique technical skills and knowledge on part of the owner. You have to be good at what you do for your business to succeed. This often means getting additional education and training on an ongoing basis, sometimes for the purpose of obtaining specific credentials (eg, certifications, licenses).

    [ad_2]

    Source by Tyrone Holmes

    Views: 0

  • What Is Wealthy Affiliate?

    [ad_1]

    Wealthy Affiliate is an online community membership site founded in 2005 by two online marketers Carson and Kyle. It has become the number one community for creating and growing a successful online business.

    Wealthy Affiliate is a training website with a massive online community who engage with one another and offer help and support.

    Who Can Profit From Wealthy Affiliate University?

    Wealthy Affiliate (WA) makes the program available for everyone, including those who don’t have enough money to pay high prices for training or have a limited budget. WA offers instruction for people with different skill levels, from newbie’s up to experienced marketers.

    People Who Can Benefit From WA:

    Internet Marketers

    Local businesses and companies

    Online merchants

    Local marketers

    People that want to build their own website(s)

    People that want to sell their products online

    Retired people, looking for an extra income

    Individuals looking for a trusted hosting platform

    Students

    People who want to turn their hobby into an additional income

    Bloggers and website owners that want to improve their web sites

    Artist/Bands/Musicians Churches and Non-Profits.

    What Wealthy Affiliate Is Not?

    WA is not a “get rich quick” scheme. WA IS NOT AN MLM program and you do not need to build a massive down line to make money from the program. There isn’t a prerequisite to sell WA itself. You will not get rich overnight, unless you are a skilled marketer. The platform will teach you how to make money online.

    It will help you to build a solid online business that will endure for a long time, along with live support that you will need to soften the notion of doing it alone.

    How much does it cost to join Wealthy Affiliate?

    Wealthy Affiliate Starter Membership – Free.

    Premium Membership – $47 month or $359 yearly.

    If you upgrade to the premium membership within 7 days your first month access will only be $19.00

    Wealthy Affiliate General Overview

    There are several types of training that are available to members and it has everything from email marketing, list building, SEO, PPC marketing, article marketing, website development and technical training. The database has more than 300 teaching lessons and each month more resources are added.

    The training is attuned to suit every ones needs and includes:

    Video training

    Tutorial Training

    Classrooms on specific topics

    Question and Answers

    Live weekly training classes

    Task based Courses

    Participate in interactive discussions

    Why Do You Need WA?

    Affordability – Usually when people see all the upgrades or up-sells for different products or services, they automatically enter a negative mindset because they know that if they do not earn quickly, they will lose a huge sum of money. Most people start on a small budget and simply cannot afford to pay for expensive advertising or constant upgrades.

    Wealthy Affiliate has a free option and members can experiment with the program without any obligations, especially if they are not sure about the direction they want to take in the online marketplace. The premium membership is at a fixed rate and that gives members the freedom to work on a budget without having to be concerned about working harder just to upgrade to another level.

    All in one platform – To become successful online, we all need more services like hosting, a blog or website, content and various tools to run our businesses successfully. These services and tools can add up to a costly amount when you put it all together, and new as well as existing online entrepreneurs struggle immeasurably to keep up when they don’t earn from the internet quickly. Wealthy Affiliate has done a great job at adding the essential tools and services into one platform to get new marketers to get that critical head start.

    Website Builder and Hosting – WA allows you to use WordPress (WP) Express to build your own WP optimized blog and SiteRubix powers it. WordPress had become the most popular blogging platform with dozens of templates to choose from. You can choose to run the blog on a free siterubix.com domain or link it to your own. SiteRubix has a remarkable reputation and websites that are hosted on the service tend to do exceptionally well compared to other hosting companies.

    Coaching and Support – New online entrepreneurs are not able to get successful by themselves. If you have questions, they will get answered! The customer support is quick to respond and aids members with any issues that they might run into. Carson and Kyle are actively partaking along with members to answer questions personally. That alone shows the great amount of dedication they have when it comes to helping members.

    People who have absolutely no clue about earning an income online enter this marketplace on a daily basis and the World Wide Web has tons of “money-making” programs, products and tutorials that confuse new marketers badly enough and even cause a massive amount of people to fall into scams or empty promises.

    It has been proven that most successful online marketers had a mentor or support program that guided them into becoming successful. This is the best active community online and many methods to communicate are available like; a live chat box, questionnaire option, forum, active dashboard and micro blog communication.

    There is no negativity or judgmental behavior like we see in the public forums, only quality conversations. You will be able to network with like-minded marketers and meet countless people who will share ideas or support one another.

    Inspiration – Without motivation, it is hard to complete anything in life, not to mention starting up an online business. Wealthy Affiliate keep their learners motivated by setting up goals and then reward those who had met the goals by giving away something of value. For most people it is much easier to reach success when they have something to work towards that is worth the effort.

    Wealthy Affiliate will most certainly not make you rich and it will not make you successful. In the end the decision to take action will all be in your hands and no amount of training or support can replace free will. The law of sowing and reaping is how you will receive your harvest.

    What Is Wealthy Affiliate?

    Wealthy Affiliate is someone who unites with others of like-mindedness, on the terms of having and obtaining legitimate unlimited wealth.

    WA gives you all the building materials, but the rest will be up to you. Getting started is always the hardest part, but with the right motivation and positive attitude there is absolutely no reason to fail.

    [ad_2]

    Source by Jamie Clay

    Views: 0

  • Book Summary – The Master-Key to Riches – Written by Napoleon Hill

    [ad_1]

    This book in a nutshell is a must read for anybody wanted to improve their lives. Regardless of what area you want to improve, Napoleon Hill shows the Master-Key works. Napoleon Hill died in 1970 at 87 years old. Thus the research he did was way ahead of his time. He profiled Andrew Carnegie who created U.S. Steel and mentored Charles Schwab. Andrew Carnegie commissioned Napoleon Hill to profile successful people to see if there was a pattern. This book along with Think and Grow Rich is a combination of that research.

    Why is this important to me?

    If I was spending my precious time listening to this video then the first question I would ask is – Why is this important to me?

    This is important because Mr. Hill explains the 12 riches of life and how to achieve them. Are you where you want to be or do you need help defining true happiness? The study of the 12 riches and the Master-Key defined in this book will give you the blueprint for happiness.

    The 12 Riches of Life are: 1. Positive Mental Attitude, 2. Sound Physical Health, 3. Harmony in Human Relationships, 4. Freedom from Fears, 5. The Hope of Achievements, 6. The Capacity of Faith, 7. Willingness to Share One’s Blessings, 8. A labor of Loves, 9. An Open Mind on All Subjects, 10, Self-discipline, 11. The capacity to Understand People, 12. Economic Security.

    All 12 riches are important but for the sake of time we will dig into three of them in this summary.

    1. Positive Mental Attitude – Mental attitude is important because it converts the brain into the equivalent of an electro-magnet which attracts the counterpart of one’s dominating thoughts, aims and purposes. It also attracts the counterpart of one’s fears, worries and doubts. This basically means that you will manifest in your life that which you focus on regardless if it is positive or negative.

    2. Sound Physical Health – This one is self-evident and should be number one. In my humble opinion, without health, you cannot create anything. Health is the ultimate gift because with it, everything else is possible. This can easily be taken for granted but once it is taken from you then life changes instantly. This needs to be a priority for everybody.

    3. The Capacity to Understand People: The person who truly understands people knows that we all come from the same core. The nine emotions common, according to the book are: love, sex, desire of material gain, self-preservation, freedom from body and mind, self-expression, desire for perpetuation of life and death, anger and fear. The capacity to understand others eliminates many of the common causes of friction among men.

    The Master-Key is a combination of 17 principles when used in combination will allow you to achieve the 12 Riches of Life.

    The Master-Key consists of:

    1) Habit of going the extra mile

    2) Definiteness of Purpose

    3) The Master mind

    4) Applied Faith

    5) Pleasing Personality

    6) Habit of learning from defeat

    7) Creative Vision

    8) Personal Initiative

    9) Accurate Thinking

    10) Self-Discipline

    11) Concentration of Endeavor

    12) Co-operation

    13) Enthusiasm

    14) The Habit of Health

    15) Budgeting Time and Money

    16) Golden Rule Applied 17) Cosmic habit force.

    For the sake of time we will profile three of the seventeen.

    1. Definiteness of Purpose – Highly successful people have a defined purpose. Mother Teresa dedicated her life in helping the poor of Calcutta and through her definite purpose became world renowned and helped millions of people.

    2. The Master Mind – is a group of people that have expertise that can be leveraged toward your defined purpose. Leveraging the combined OPE (Other People’s expertise) gives a compound effect to the desired result.

    3. Habit going the Extra Mile – I like this one because the 12 Riches of Life can NOT be attained without hard, smart and right work. You have to do the thing to have the power!!!! Notice this is the HABIT of going the extra mile. Ingrain this in your mind and you will not be disappointed with the results.

    I hope you have found this short summary useful. The key to any new idea is to work it into your daily routine until it becomes habit.

    Habits form in as little as 21 days. I highly recommend you read this book and put the principles in place. To take one thing away from the summary and make it habit will be the “Habit of Going the Extra Mile”. Put this front and center and it will help you in everything you do.

    According to Mr. Hill, Going the extra mile by doing more than one is paid for – “It is the strange influence which it has on the person who does it. The greatest benefit from this habit does not come to those to whom the service is rendered. It comes to the one who renders the service, in the form of a changed “mental attitude,” which gives him more influence with other people, more self-reliance, greater initiative, more enthusiasm, more vision and definiteness of purpose. Do the thing and you shall have the power!!!!

    [ad_2]

    Source by Joe Mosed

    Views: 0

  • Shamanic Healing Through Sounds

    [ad_1]

    Shamanism, often considered to be the oldest of the healing professions, makes use of voice, drum, and rattles to communicate with the spirit world, seeking its positive healing energy for a patient. The human voice is the most common means used to summon the spirit worlds.

    In our Native American cultures, specific ‘songs’ are used for healing and these are passed down from one generation to the next. Each culture, having its own traditions, also has its songs.

    When one first hears a shaman’s song, one can’t help but feel the words all sound the same. Much of this may be due to the imitation in movies and television programs. The standard song appears to be “Ah Hey Ya” or something similar to “Ye Ha No Ha.” A careful listening reveals the sounds are the vowel sounds of A, E, I O, and U. During the chanting of these sounds; the sound of each vowel is elongated and is sung with specific intent-the intent to heal an ill patient. Each vowel has its own meaning.

    As tradition dictates, the four directions are acknowledged. The vowel A represents Earth and refers to the direction North. E represents Air and the direction of East; I represents Fire and the direction South, O represents water and the direction West. The vowel of O represents the aether and significantly it refers to being about. Once the four directions and the aether are recognized, the vowel sounds shift in use and meaning. The vowel sound of A is for purification while I emphasizes our relationship to all things (living and nonliving), E, brings a connection to the spirit world, and U takes the shaman into the spirit’s presence. O invokes the idea of innocence.

    During the singing, the shaman may accompany himself with a drum beat or the beat of a rattle. A helper may beat the drum or shake the rattles. During this time, the shaman may dance around the patient.

    Because of modern science, we have a better understanding of what the physical aspects of sound have on the human being. Simply, all things are vibrating molecules. When we are ill, those vibrations get out of sync. The shaman and his chanting and his drums connect to that vibration and realign the natural harmonics of the body; thus, allowing it to heal itself.

    Norman W Wilson, PhD

    [ad_2]

    Source by Norman W. Wilson, Ph.D

    Views: 0

  • The Making of a Multi-Million Dollar Insurance Salesperson

    [ad_1]

    Every sales person or sales agent fantasizes about becoming a millionaire. This is how one individual became a Multi Million Dollar Insurance Salesperson.

    Over half the insurance agents recruited earn less than $50,000 before making a quick exist. So how do you make a million dollars, an then more? Especially when your career involves selling insurance? For me it was not by working 70 hours a week. No “get rich quick” insurance trade magazine article or ad inspired me. I don’t ever recall working with millionaire clients. In fact, in my case it would take a ton of policies to equal a million dollars premium collected, let alone commission earned. I never even received one of the over 90 insurance designations currently available.

    My case involved putting together a formula, that you could easily (with effort) mix to achieve similar or superior results. For me the ingredients were composed of four components.

    WILLPOWER I need to convince myself that I could achieve the insurance production goals I was setting. To begin, I purchased a collection of books on positive thinking. In them they emphasize phrases like “I Can” and “I Will”. I repeated these key word phrases over and over in my conscious mind, and saw some definite steady improvement in my sales achievements. Good but not good enough.

    Suddenly I was introduced to self-hypnosis and my insurance career instantly changed. This was not some occult form of hocus-pocus but sheer enrichment that builds and builds. It start with a client from England who was a professional hypnotist. I was intrigued, and he agreed to teach me how the subconscious mind automatically overrides the conscious mind. He then graciously taught how to easily hypnotize myself anytime I wanting. I programmed myself for success, and success followed.

    SALES SKILLS The so called selling skills insurance companies showed me, never really improved. I quickly saw that repetition of a bad habit is dangerous to your career. Now that my income was rising, I added another piece of dynamite to reaching sales goals faster. If I could double my closing ratio, it was simple to see my income doubling.

    I invested in the Dale Carnegie course for sales people. During this course I learned the steps that must be covered properly if you are going to expect a sale. What I did not expect was the announcement that passing the course required covering all the points in a two minute or less presentation. This is when I re-emerged a trait, I was not using enough.

    DETERMINATION I set myself a goal that surpassed just passing the course. Although there were around 25 people taking the course, I was determined. Not only was I going to pass, but my presentation would be voted the best of my fellow 2 dozen professional sales people. Needless to say, it took willpower, sales skill, and determination galore. Winning, gave me a feeling of floating sky high. After this I felt I could sell snow to an Eskimo.

    NO FEAR I have to admit, when I started selling insurance I was full of fears. It took the first 3 ingredients and one more step to prove to myself that I now had no fear. I had to do what few before me financially succeeding in trying. That was to make sales, by breaking the established rules, and doing what “experts” considered would only be done by fools. I would exchange my briefcase for a folder and yellow pad. My suit and tie would be reserved for funerals, and my dress code would be neat, yet informal. Now I was prepped for my no fear test.

    Without setting a single appointment, I opted to just knock on a prospects door, and do a simple presentation. I also programmed myself to act casual, using a “well, maybe you can’t afford it” approach if I had a closing objection. I knew most prospects have their conscious minds ready to be told they can certainly afford it. Using the opposite effect would alter their conscious thinking process.

    Starting on a Monday morning and working no evenings I wanted to test my abilities to the max. I started out well self-hypnotized and with about 50 prospect cards, some of them “leads”. Remember now, we are talking over 30 years ago. Without appointments I saw 25 prospects and made 30 straight sales of all sizes. Not a single strikeout. With over $20,000 premium and much of it in annual cash payments, I decided to stop with $12,000 in commissions. I had accomplished and achieved my goals in just four days. Yes, with a rounded effective formula you can put on the brakes.

    MY FIRST MILLION was then made very easily. For me, I proved I could become a millionaire, by breaking all the rules. My average policy size was not gigantic but my closing ratio was incredible. I did not wear a suit or tie or carry a briefcase. My cars were snazzy new Camaros and Mustangs, and I quit wasting time struggling to make appointments.

    There is one danger in programming yourself to achieve a certain goal. Since you are bound to achieve it, before applying self-hypnosis, ask yourself if it is good for your mind and body to do whatever it takes.

    To become a multi million dollar insurance salesman, do the opposite of most salespeople are doing. Develop your own prospecting methods, presentation sills, and closing tricks. It becomes much easier making an insurance sale when in your mind you have already done it, and have the acquired sales skills to back it up.

    I did it my way. You can too.

    [ad_2]

    Source by Donald Yerke

    Views: 0

  • Mindset: A Summary

    [ad_1]

    Dr. Carol S. Dweck was challenged by her student to write a book on the results of years of their research study. Dr. Carol S. Dweck rose to the occasion and has written this book, “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, and How we can Learn to Fulfill Our Potential” in the hope that it will help the ordinary human being understand that life is what you make it and not what was dealt to you at birth. She has written in simple language giving examples of ordinary real people like herself and her students, artists like Picasso, sportsmen like Michael Jordan, the basketball player and John McEnroe the tennis player, Marina Semyonova the great Russian dance instructor and CEOs of different companies to name a few. In the third paragraph of her introduction she writes, “… you’ll learn how a simple belief about yourself… guides a large part of your life… In fact it permeates every part of your life… ” Thus she draws the reader into the book, making the reader one of her real life examples as the reader finds himself or herself in these examples.

    Dr. Dweck introduces the two types of mindsets, the fixed mindset and the growth mindset in the first section of the book. She writes how she learned from ten year old kids that failure could be turned into a gift if you had the right mindset. By giving them hard puzzles to work on, the kids cultivated their intellectual skills through effort and did not give up. These kids became her role models in her pursuit of whether human qualities are things that can be cultivated or are things curved in stone. Each person has a unique genetic endowment but experience, training, and personal effort take them the rest of the way.

    Dr. Dweck’s twenty years of research has shown that the view you adopt for yourself profoundly affects the way you lead your life. She writes that, if you believe that your qualities and traits are curved in stone and cannot be changed then you have a fixed mindset. And if you believe that cherished qualities and traits can be developed and cultivated then you have a growth mindset.

    Fixed mindset people believe that an individual’s intelligence, quality and traits are a fixed quantity which cannot be increased. If they are doing well in school then they are smarter than the others who are not doing well. If they do well in sports then they have talent dealt them at birth. They spend time to prove that they are better in the qualities dealt to them just to prove they were dealt a healthy dose and that they are not deficient. If something doesn’t work for fixed mindset people they always blame it on something else.

    Growth mindset people work hard to do better always. They do not sit back and see their accomplishments as the final goal. In their minds there is always room for improvement. They have no time to sit and see themselves as the best or better than others. They have no time to sit and think that they have a special talent. They are busy thinking of how they can make it better and what changes they can make if something expected did not go right. To them if something doesn’t go right it’s not failure it is a challenge to find out ways to make it happen.

    In the second section of the book, Dr.Dweck, takes us through her research journey of fixed mindset and a journey of growth mindset through several sets of eyes. Showing how these two mindsets make or break people in their daily lives. In individual sports she gives an example of John McEnroe fixed mindset in tennis. He was a brilliant player who believed on talent not effort and working hard. When he didn’t win he blamed it on something else. Like when he blamed the system for not liking the game any more. He would not take responsibility. Micheal Jordan on the other hand has a growth mindset. If he missed a goal he would go and practice for several hours trying to figure out why he missed it In team sport the author gives an example of Couch John Wooden who was tactically and strategically average but went on to win ten national championships. Coach Wooden a growth mindset, tells us he was good at getting players to fill roles as part of a team. He cared about the feelings of the players. Fixed mindset like Coach Bobby Knight picked players for talent. He was an excellent coach but used the dictator approach to win. The winning were short lived and broke individuals’ characters in the process.

    In corporate companies the author uses General Electric CEO, Jack Welch, as the fixed mindset who managed to humble himself to a growth mindset and as he grew in his mindset the company grew at the same time. Lee Iacocca whose fixed mind set is good to bring the company up to the top in a hurry but then you need to get rid of him before he breaks it. Ford motor company did just that and Lee Iacocca was not happy. Fixed mindsets leaders are more concerned with being heroes and put their ego before the welfare of the company. The author gives example of Enron as a company that broke in the hands fixed mindset high echelon smart people. Enron employed smart people with talent and paid the maximum price of closing the company. Enron is a good example of groupthink where executives get carried away with their brilliance and superiority and make catastrophic decisions.

    In love, these two mindsets can make or break a relationship. In her research, Dr. Dweck, found out that fixed mindsets feel judged and labeled by rejection in a break up. They also chose revenge as a means to get at the person who hurt them. Growth mindsets chose to forgive, learn from it and move on. The author gives Hilary Clinton as an example who forgave her husband and went to canceling in order to save her relationship. Time and effort is needed to cultivate the emotional skills that are needed to keep a relationship.

    Dr. Dweck, ends this third section with the influence that parents’, teachers’ and coaches’ mindsets have on children that are under their care. In her research she found out that children interpret the caregivers words of support and encouragement in a fixed mindset approach. This sets them up for failure. For example, “… You learned that so quickly! You are so smart… ” is interpreted as “… If I don’t learn something quickly, I’m not smart… ” She explains that parents, teachers and coaches should refrain from giving praise that judges their intelligence or talent but praise them for the work that they put in. She goes on to say parents, teachers, and coaches need to give equal time and attention to the children regardless of their initial skills. The children will in turn give all and blossom. The author points out, “… As parents, teachers, and coaches we are entrusted with peoples’ lives. They are our responsibility and our legacy… “

    In the fourth section of the book, Dr. Dweck, embarks on the most gratifying part of her work, watching people change. People are not conscious or aware of their beliefs. Dr Aaron Beck, a psychiatrist, discovered that he could teach them how to work with and change these beliefs. And cognitive therapy, one of the most effective therapies ever developed, was born. Dr Dweck, used workshops to probe the way people of fixed mindsets dealt with information they were receiving. She found that they put a strong evaluation on each piece of information. Something good led to a very strong positive label and something bad led to a very strong negative label. People with growth mindset are also constantly monitoring what’s going on, but their internal monologue is not about judging themselves or others. They are sensitive to positive and negative information, but they are attuned to it’s implications for learning and constructive action. Dr. Dweck also had workshop for students. The workshops require a large staff to deliver the material. So the workshop material was put on interactive computer modules. The teachers guide their classes through the modules, and called it Braintology. These mindset workshops put students in charge of their brain.

    It is interesting to note how a simple characteristic like a mindset affects decision making in a wide spectrum of the population. A student in kindergarten, a CEO in billion dollar company, a surgeon at work in a hospital, a sportsman at practice and on the court, a chef at a high end hotel, selection of dance students and a sport team. College students drop classes or drop out of school due to having a fixed mindset. A growth mindset helps you learn to deal with anger, and deal with stereotypes in racial and gender discrimination. It’s quite fascinating.

    [ad_2]

    Source by Nancy Maina

    Views: 0

  • My Husband Says He’s Miserable With Me and Isn’t Sure He Wants to Be Married – Insights to Help

    [ad_1]

    Over the weekend, I received some correspondence from a wife who had noticed her husband acting cold and distant all weekend. He seemed to be picking fights, was clearly on edge and was showing body language and postures which indicated that something was very wrong. Of course, the wife asked him what was bothering him and he proceeded to answer with phrases like “nothing,” or “it’s just a bad day.”

    The wife was not happy with these responses and continued to press. The husband proceeded to withdrawal and act defensive. Finally, after the wife continued to follow him around and nag him, he angrily blurted out “can’t you see I’m miserable with you? If it weren’t for the kids, I’m not sure if I’d even want to be married to you.” The wife later regretted her response (which was to tell the husband that being married to him was no picnic either.)

    Later when they both calmed down, she asked him if he really meant what he said. The husband took a deep breath and said “I really don’t want to hurt you, but yes, I’m just not happy. I don’t know if it’s healthy for either of us to remain married.” The wife wanted my advice as to how she should proceed or act around him as he was clearly determined to sulk and complain. I will tell you what I told her in the following article.

    Determining What Responsibility A Wife Has In Her Husband’s Misery: The wife admitted that things weren’t perfect in her marriage. In fact, she had felt a distance growing in her marriage for some time. However, she would have never guessed that her husband was as miserable as he said he was. She suspected that he was projecting some disappointment and misery in other areas of his life and from his work onto their marriage.

    She may well have been right. This is actually quite a common occurrence. Much of the misery that he was feeling may not have initiated with her, but what was more important than it’s origin was the fact that he was equating his negative feelings with her and with the marriage. This may well be very unfair and even quite inaccurate. But, like it or not, this was her reality today and even she admitted that the marriage could use some improvement.

    So, while much of this may not have been her fault, there were certainly areas that she could address and improve. In a marriage that is working well, the spouse who is having issues with his job, his life, or his family will typically find solace and comfort in his spouse – rather than blaming her for the problem. The fact that he was doing just that indicated that there was a lot of room for improvement.

    So while the responsibility for the husband’s misery very likely did not lie totally with the wife, there was some opportunity to provide support and to let him know that she was there for him, willing to listen, and willing to help him in any way that she could – which is probably exactly what she would want for him to do if the roles were reversed.

    Beginning To Make Improvements In Your Marriage When You Husband Wants To Remain Alone In Being Miserable: When I explained some of these things with the wife, she was a bit resistant. She said that he was moping around so much that he might trip on his bottom lip. Granted, it can be hard to approach someone like this. But, she had pretty much been either ignoring him or trying to convince him either that he wasn’t as miserable as he thought, or that, if he was, this was his fault and not hers.

    Although this strategy is understandable, it’s not usually the most effective. The first step would be to calmly bring this out into the open and say your peace in a positive way that doesn’t continue to encourage or elicit his negative emotions. She might start by saying something like “I’m very sorry that you’re so unhappy right now. I love you and want for you to be happy. If there’s anything that I can do to help with this, I’m more than willing to do that. I can listen. I can offer support. I can make some shifts and changes if that’s what you need, but I can’t read your mind. Are you willing to talk about this so that we can come up with a plan to make this better?”

    I had no way to predict how the husband was going to react. I can tell you from previous experiences that some husbands will continue on with the negative act and say things like “it’s too late,” or “there’s nothing that you can do now.” Some men, though will begin to meet you half way even in the beginning. No matter what reaction you get, it’s very important that you respond in a positive manner. If they lash out, reply that you’re sorry to hear that and again offer your support. Eventually as you remain calm, supportive, and positive, it will become harder and harder to remain negative when you refuse to engage them.

    If they do tell you some things that might help, by all means meet them half way and do what you can to make things better. Although not all of this is your fault, it will only benefit both you and your marriage if you can lighten the tension, begin to identify and work on the issues, and to be the spouse that you would want your husband to be to you if the roles were reversed. If you can do this, it’s highly likely that all of the “ending the marriage” talk will begin to eventually lessen also.

    [ad_2]

    Source by Leslie Cane

    Views: 0

  • Social Media Trends Every Digital Marketer Should Know About

    [ad_1]

    Social media trends are constantly changing and consumers are always eager to be a part of the interactive campaigns with their fluid use of devices, channels, and screens, and they expect that their experiences should be seamless, engaging, and entertaining. As consumers adapt, digital marketers have to be flexible and savvy about how to break through into their ever-changing behaviors, to make an impact, resonate, and inspire, to get their attention.

    The focus is on innovative execution, smart content and mobile awareness. These trends in today’s social media should likewise inspire digital marketers to take their cross-channel marketing to new levels.

    Some brands are now using blog content to sell consumer products. Others are using mobile apps to engage their mobile audience. Smart digital marketers should be quick to embrace the ever-changing rules of search engine optimization, social media and online marketing with creative innovation as well with designs to engage consumers. Some notable trends in digital marketing seen to resonate and inspire consumers are in key areas that have to do with the following:

    · Product context: because today’s consumers care more about how a product can have a positive impact on their daily lives-the benefits of a product is what digital marketing should be selling.

    · Guided creativity: consumers like to explore and engage with content without the scrolling on mobile devices-it’s such great idea in terms of using smaller screen design elements, easy to draw the consumers’ attention.

    · Idea-based ecosystems: social media have become giant selfies and a business can now showcase its identity, and it’s a win when a company can tie its brand to the identity of the consumer.

    · Content curation and aggregation: the information overload in today’s online environment underscores the need for relevant information such that when a business becomes the go-to-source for relevant information on a specific need, consumers will seek out.

    · 4-screen revolution: being able to interact with consumers on the multiple devices they use today-TV, mobile phone, laptop and tablet-a great way of coping with the ever shrinking attention spans of consumers.

    · Video messaging campaigns: video campaigns are becoming relevant in digital marketing to promote a brand and they appeal to the interest of consumers.

    · Decoding digital signals: the importance of using analytics is a great way to understand consumers and how best to reach them. Mobile usage has increased significantly in today’s social trends as such the smart digital marketer should ensure the company’s website is optimized for mobile phones to capture traffic that goes through mobile devices.

    · Social ad targeting: messaging apps like SnapChat is great for social media ad targeting. Smart brands could stage fleeting sales via a SnapChat-when opened up, the target has few seconds of messaging and it’s a catcher.

    Effective digital marketing is developing conversations with consumers that keep them engaged to ensure a brand is better than the alternative. Consumers keep raising the bar on what they expect from businesses and digital marketers have to work even harder to meet those expectations.

    [ad_2]

    Source by Kenday S Kamara

    Views: 0