Tag: Painful

  • Nigeria’s Unhealthy Healthcare In Eye Of Coronavirus By Runcie C.W. Chidebe

    Nigeria’s Unhealthy Healthcare In Eye Of Coronavirus By Runcie C.W. Chidebe

    Nigeria’s Unhealthy Healthcare In Eye Of Coronavirus By Runcie C.W. Chidebe 1

    Nigeria’s Unhealthy Healthcare In Eye Of Coronavirus By Runcie C.W. Chidebe 2


    Coronavirus (COVID-19) is right here to show us a lesson; I hope we be taught. Nigeria’s healthcare is unhealthy. But as an alternative of fixing it our rulers have been busy flying up and down to profit from different nation’s productive well being system. With Coronavirus, actuality is upon us. No extra operating abroad for medical trip. Our rulers can’t journey to the United Kingdom, United States of America or India anymore for medical care. These nations are additionally hanging on their final breath, battling to outlive the COVID-19 pandemic. 

    In 2017, President Muhammadu Buhari spent 103 days in London receiving medical therapy for an undisclosed sickness, spending taxpayers’ cash as an alternative of investing within the nation’s healthcare. Thousands of Nigerians died in the identical interval from totally different sicknesses. More than 3,000 girls died of breast most cancers, greater than 2,000 girls died of cervical most cancers and greater than 1,500 males died of prostate most cancers, in line with World Health Organization (WHO) figures on annual most cancers mortality.  

    I had hoped that on his return to Nigeria, President Buhari would declare a state of emergency within the nation’s well being sector. Painfully, nothing of such occurred. Nigeria’s funds allocation to healthcare has remained lower than 5% of the whole funds for the previous 5 years. Simply put, in 2020 the federal authorities budgeted N2,000 (£4.2) for every Nigerian with a complete of N427.Three billion as funds allocation to the well being sector whereas the United Kingdom budgeted £2,159.6 for every citizen with a complete well being funds of £143.4billion. It is similar dismal story within the states throughout Nigeria. Healthcare isn’t a precedence. In some states in Nigeria, a hospital is a 20-minute boat journey and an hour-long automobile journey. Because many poor Nigerians don’t personal boats, a girl in labour may bleed to loss of life earlier than she reaches the hospital.

    On March 22, 2018, Bill Gates, founding father of Microsoft and the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, criticized Nigerian authorities’s poor funding of healthcare within the nation. In his phrases, “One in three children is chronically malnourished.” This tragedy has large implications for the economic system. According to the World Bank, addressing the stunting disaster in Nigeria would add virtually $30 billion to Nigeria’s GDP. It is painful that regardless of Mr. Gates assertion, nothing has modified. Nigeria has remained one of many nations on this planet with the worst healthcare system with over 60 deaths per 1000 stay births. Nigeria has one of many worst most cancers survival charges on this planet, with solely 2 to three most cancers radiotherapy machines working at any time and fewer than 70 oncologists for a inhabitants of over 200 million. 

    COVID-19 is exposing the insensitivity of our leaders to issues that matter most to us. That Nigerians are disobeying the federal government’s security recommendation on COVID-19 is a transparent reflection of residents’ distrust for his or her leaders. Many Nigerians belief their non secular leaders greater than they belief our political leaders. Successive governments have failed the nation, and it doesn’t appear like factor will change anytime quickly. 

    Nigeria is a rustic the place our rulers make legal guidelines as we speak and break the identical legal guidelines tomorrow. The Nigeria Centre for Diseases Control (NCDC) adopted the World Health Organization (WHO) guideline and strongly inspired all Nigerians coming from sure nations to self-isolate and monitor themselves, as a method to comprise or to delay the unfold of COVID-19. The president’s Chief of Staff, Abba Kyari, returned from Germany and as an alternative of isolating himself he was leaping from one state to a different, attending occasions and conferences with totally different folks, breaching the federal government’s personal advice and inserting the lives of different Nigerians in danger! 

    Now that COVID-19 is in Nigeria we have to face it with all that we’ve. But can we? The Nigeria Centre for Disease Control (NCDC) is now the nation’s solely perceived hope. Many Nigerians have been calling NCDC scorching traces, criticizing NCDC for not testing sufficient folks. But we must always face the music and never the dancer. NCDC is crippled and never effectively outfitted to guard Nigerians from the illness. 

    In 2016, NCDC budgeted N3.7m for its recurrent and N248m for capital allocations. That is a complete of N251.7m. Out of this, solely N155m was launched to the centre. In the identical 12 months, 1,166 Nigerians died of Cerebrospinal Meningitis. In 2017, the NCDC had a funds of N1.5b. Only N782m was launched. In the identical 12 months, greater than 120 Nigerians contracted Monkeypox and 7 folks died from the illness. That identical 12 months, the Presidency budgeted N77m for Aso Rock lease, N1b for journeys and sitting allowances, and N94m for meals. In 2018, the NCDC had a funds of N1.9b. Only N654m was launched. In the identical 12 months, N7.2b was proposed for Presidential Air Fleet. N440m was proposed for necessary improve and set up of stay TV and web service within the presidential aircrafts, N375m for brand spanking new cabin administration, N418m for the touchdown gears. In whole, over N1b was budgeted for the presidential aircrafts which is used for medical tourism and frequent journeys overseas. 

    On November 12, 2018, the NCDC institution invoice was signed by President Muhammadu Buhari, because of the efforts of Senator Mao Ohuabunwa, the then Chair, Senate Committee on Primary Healthcare and Communicable Diseases. On this premise, the NCDC was empowered with a laws for its work in stopping and making ready for outbreaks of infectious illnesses. Interestingly, the NCDC acquired the worst funds in 2019, the 12 months following the passage of the NCDC Act. The Centre had a funds of N1.4b, however solely N224m was launched. In the identical 12 months, over 472 Nigerians have been identified with Lassa fever and over 110 folks died from this viral hemorrhagic fever. Clearly, NCDC can’t carry out magic. They need assistance. Nigeria is grossly under-testing for COVID-19, the laboratories usually are not sufficient, and NCDC and its affiliate businesses wouldn’t have sufficient manpower and sources. 

    Months in the past, being unwell evoked empathy; as we speak being unwell evokes concern. The concern of COVID-19? No! It is the concern of not gaining access to the care that you just want, the concern of absence of ventilators, the concern of a damaged well being system. It is the concern of loss of life. Our political leaders have stolen from the sick by corruption. Many Nigerian governors construct non-functional hospitals of their states. Usually, after the commissioning of those hospitals, all of the CT Scan, Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI) and different medical machines—a few of them faux—are returned to the place they have been bought or left to rot. 

    Hospitals in Nigeria are among the worst on this planet. Our educating hospitals at the moment are museums the place lower than 5% of medical trial and analysis is occurring due to poor laboratory. Medical tourism has due to this fact grow to be the norm. Dubai hospitals, Saudi Arabian hospitals, and so on., are promoting in Abuja and Lagos for Nigerian sufferers. They are recruiting Nigerian docs, together with consultants. Nigeria isn’t solely going through “brain drain,” we’re additionally going through “patient drain.” Our docs and nurses work within the worst situations. Hazard allowance for well being staff is about N5,000 whereas wardrobe allowance for members of the National Assembly runs into hundreds of thousands. 

    Now is the time for Nigeria to confront its healthcare disaster. The Nigerian authorities should settle for its failure. Our political leaders should brace as much as their duty and critically replicate on the issue their greed has delivered to Nigeria. This is the time to put money into a result-oriented healthcare system. Health is wealth because the saying goes. healthcare system is the muse of any nation. 

    If we survive COVID-19, we have to contemplate a legislation to limit all public officers from searching for medical care overseas. It could also be perceived as strict, however it can save future generations since we don’t know which pandemic would come subsequent and when. 

    Let’s give each Nigerian an area to stay and a not probability to die. 

    Runcie C.W. Chidebe is Executive Director, Project PINK BLUE. He is at the moment a Commonwealth Scholar on Transforming and Leading in Health Care at Birmingham City University, United Kingdom. He tweets @runciecwc

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  • Bombardier removes CEO after trains, planes divisions sold off

    Bombardier removes CEO after trains, planes divisions sold off

    Bombardier has removed its chief executive Alain Bellemare, who oversaw the Canadian manufacturing behemoth’s sell-off of its trains and commercial aviation divisions in a painful restructuring.

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  • Even after blocking an ex on Facebook, the platform promotes painful reminders

    Even after blocking an ex on Facebook, the platform promotes painful reminders

    Anthony Pinter, a Ph.D. student in information science at the University of Colorado Boulder, recently completed a study on people’s experiences with upsetting and unexpected reminders of an ex on Facebook.

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  • Spinoza’s Ethics of Strength of the Emotions in W Somerset Maughm’s Of Human Bondage

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    The writer probes on the complex world of W. Somerset Maughm’s protagonist in the novel Of Human Bondage, using the propositions the Jewish Portuguese philosopher Baruch Spinoza postulated in his book Ethics in 1674. Some of Spinoza’s propositions are as follows( Morgan, 2006, pp 108-120):

    The following propositions of Spinoza enlighten the changing character of Philip in his own bildungsromans of his life. The force and increase of any passive emotion and its persistence in existing is defined not by the power whereby we ourselves endeavour to persist in existing, but by the power of external causes compared with our own power;

    The force of any passive emotion can surpass the rest of man’s activities or power so that the emotion stays firmly fixed in him;

    An emotion cannot be checked or destroyed except by a contrary emotion which is stronger than the emotion which is to be checked;

    Knowledge of good and evil is nothing other than the emotion of pleasure or pain insofar as we are conscious of it;

    An emotion whose cause we think to be with us in the present is stronger than it would be if we did not think the said cause to be with us;

    We are affected toward a future thing which we imagine to be imminent mo intensely than if we were to imagine its time of existence tofarther away from the present. We are also affected by a remembrance of a thing we imagine to belong to the near past more intensely if we were to imagine it to belong to the distant past;

    An emotion toward a thing which we think of as inevitable [necessarius] is more intense, other things being equal, than emotion toward a thing possible or contingent, that is, not inevitable;

    Emotion toward a thing which we know not exist in the present, and which we imagine to be possible, is, other things being equal, more intense than emotion toward a contingent thing;

    Emotion toward a contingent thing which we know not to exist in the present, is, other things being equal, feebler than emotion toward a thing past;

    No emotion can be checked by the true knowledge of good and evil, insofar as it is true, but only insofar as it is;

    Desire that arises from the true knowledge of good and evil can be extinguished or checked by many other desires that arise from the emotions by which we are assailed;

    The desires that arises from a knowledge of good and evil insofar as this knowledge has regard to to the future can be the more easily checked or extinguished by desire of things that are attractive in the present;

    Desire that arises from the true knowledge of good and evil insofar as this knowledge is concerned with contingent things can be even more easily checked by desire for things which are present;

    Desire arising from pleasure is, other things being equal, stronger than desire arising from pain;

    Every man, from the laws of his nature, necessarily seeks or avoids what he judges to be good or evil.

    The more every man endeavours and is able to seek advantage, that is, to preserve his own being, the more he is endowed with virtue. On the other hand insofar as he neglects to preserve what is to his advantage, that is, his own being to that extent he is weak.

    Philip is highly affected by nature. There is in Nature no individual thing that is surpassed in strength and power by some other thing. Whatsoever thing there is, there is another more powerful by which the said thing can be destroyed. And he was able to surpass all his problems because of the incoming different emotions, problems which proved to make him stronger if not released from “Human Bondage”.

    The force whereby a man persist in existing is limited, and infinitely surpassed by the power of external causes.

    Philip’s deformity limits his own persistence to live. But his meeting with Hayward, Clutton and Lawson, his former classmates in France, who taught him that life is all about passion and the pursuit of it, he became engross in his art. France did not also care about his clubfoot. Cronshaw taught him more philosophy in life about living in let live. Cronshaw even on his death bed, defied doctors’ prohibition. His life is anyway to end just like any other’s lives.

    Set in Kent, England, a sub-urban near London, the novel presents the multifaceted personal, social, political and religious experiences of Philip carey from his childhood to his middle age of thirty. A bildungsroman (1991, Smiley) in style, which highlights the formation of a youngman’s character through education, travels and early life experiences. Philip at the age of nine, as a young boy, is set apart from his peers by some misfortune and undergoes a humiliating experience that later proves strengthening. his first experience of love is unsuccessful or problematic one that nevertheless paves the way to a happy marriage with a suitable mate. The novel has ample observation, if not criticism, with the character’s institutions such as schools, churches and class structures.

    Philip’s personal life is truly an amalgam of life’s tragedies. But how he surpassed the seemingly insurmountable heap of oppressing weight, if not the meaninglessness or nothingness of life, is the focus of this attempt anchored on Spinoza’s propositions. To enumerate, at an early age, his mother died of tuberculosis and his father, a medical doctor, died of lung cancer. His innocence never understood the situation. He has only the temporary joy of travelling to Blackstable to live with his uncle William and childless Auntie Louisa. Forcibly liking his second family as an orphan, he is left reading his books without noise for his uncle, a Vicar in the community, is irated with children’s unruly behaviour. Aunt Louisa is incapable of understanding Philip. he is left with the care of the governess. His personal disability or deformity, being born with a club-foot, proves to be the stigma of his life forever. His early education in Kingston School, caused his early childhood bitter as his peers laughed at him, mocked and physically abused him because of his physical abnormality. Then, his adolescence which brings him to Heidelberg, Germany to study foreign languages, is never sweet. Girls chided him for his deformity. the consolation is meeting friends like Hayward and Miss Wilkinson, who flirted with him, to his disgust. His sojourn to France, albeit, his uncle’s disappointment, proves to be annihilating. His lack of talent in painting plus his deformity, made him a mediocre student. His classmate Fanny Price, who fell in love with him, on the pretext of sharing the same abnormality (hers is lack of beauty), committed suicide out of hunger and wretchedness.

    Then everything escalated to its height, when realizing that painting is not his passion, he goes back to England. He decides to change again to pursue what his uncle William tells him to do: to follow the footsteps of his father. To be a doctor. feeling he has nothing to do, he embraces the new idea. Sauntering along the Parliamentary Street of London, he is driven to dine in a cafe where he meets the slatternly waitress Mildred Rogers who awakens his sexual desire. But his languid mien, caused by his club-foot proves to be a disadvantage. the waitress prefers rugged and rich men. But his desire to pursue the pale, anaemic, aloof Mildred, beomes a challenge to him. Gradually, the two becomeclose. But the ambitious and materialistic waitress always insults him because of his deformity. to slander him cripple, would totally “cripple” his mood and emotion. Even when Philip is generous to the moody Mildred, she hurt him by marrying a German businessman Miller. His desperation is tantamount to his yearning for Mildred. He is left believing that one day, he would see Mildred again. His concentration with his medical study is forlorned. And Mildred came back,looking sickly, with a child. His generosity and forgiveness for his first love, who hurts him the most, is even greater than life. The ingrate waitress after a little recovery from poverty, elopes with Griffith, Philip’s handsome and robust classmate. That is the height of Mildred’s shamelessness. So her expected return is welcomed with derision by the newly awakened Philip. Even when Mildred turns into a prostitute, Philip is only capable of compassion, without passion or sexual desire. She is freed at last. And Philip is extricated from the pains excruciatingly caused by the destitute Mildred.

    His obsession to Mildred costs Philip his fortune and gradually his savings is left with seven pounds. He is forced to stop from his medical studies that brings him to experience unbelievable poverty. He meets the generous Athelneys who fed and sheltered him in his misery. His uncle’s death, leaving an average fortune, helps him to finish his medical studies. His fateful shelter with the Athelneys brings him to his final, harmonious and peaceful resolution to marry Sally Athelney and go on with his life beautifully. Shakespeare is affirmed by saying that “all is well that ends well.

    At this juncture, it is noteworthy to enumerate Spinoza’s propositions to elucidate Philip’s “bondage” and his strength of his emotion. Spinoza in his preface to his philosophical treatise wrote:

    I assign the term “bondage” to man’s lack of power to control and check the emotions. For a man at the mercy of his emotions is not his own master but is subject to fortune, in whose power he so lies that he is often compelled, although he sees the better course, to pursue the worse. In this Part I have set myself the task of demonstrating why is so, and also what is good and what is bad in emotions. But before I begin, I should like to make a few preliminary observations on perfection and imperfection, and on good and bad ( Morgan, 2006).

    In the beginning, Philip is a slave if not a victim of his emotion. His physical deformity, his club-foot, caused him too much pain. He learned to hate his classmates and,worst, abandoned his belief in God. He could not appreciate the God of his uncle vicar when God cannot give him the miracle he wanted to have normal feet. His painful childhood in school changed him to be rough character. He never wanted to become a vicar anymore. His obsession to Mildred indeed showed his real weakness as a man, and even wretchedness as a human being because of his deformity. he would always think that women cannot love him as he is because of his deformity.

    He who has undertaken something and has brought it to completion will say that the thing is completed; and not only he but everyone who rightly knew, or thought he knew, the intention and aim of the author of that work. For example, if anyone sees a work (which I assumed is not yet finished) and knows that the aim of author is to build a house, he will say the house is imperfect. On the other hand, as soon as he sees that the work has been brought to the conclusion that its author had intended to give it, he will say that the house is perfect. But if anyone sees a work whose like he had never seen before, and he does not know the artifecer’s intention, he cannot possibly know whether the work is perfect or imperfect.

    This appears to have been the original meaning of these terms. But when men began to form general ideas and to devise ideal type of houses, buildings, towers, and so on, and to prefer some models to others, it came about that each called “perfect” that which he saw at variance with his own preconceived ideal, although in the artifecer’s opinion it had been fully completed. There seems to be no other reason why even natural phenomena (those not made by human hand) should commonly be called perfect or imperfect. For men there are wont to form general ideas both natural phenomena and artifacts, and these ideas they regard as models, and they believed that Nature (which they consider does nothing without an end in view) looks to this ideas and holds them before herself as models. So when they see something occurring in Nature at variance with their preconceived ideal of the thing in question, they believed that Nature has then failed or blundered and has left that thing imperfect from their own preconceptions rather than from true knowledge.

    So perfection and imperfection are in reality only models of thinking, notions which we are wont to invent from comparing individuals of the same species or kind; and it is for this reason that I previously said (Def. 6, II) that by reality and perfection I mean the same thing. For we are wont to classify all the individuals in Nature under one genus which is called the highest genus, namely, the notion of Entity, which pertains to all the individuals in Nature without exception. Therefore insofar as we classify individuals in Nature under this genus and compare them with one another and find that some have more being or reality than others, to that extent we say that some are more perfect than the others. And insofar as we attribute to them something involving negotiation, such as limit, end, impotence and so on, to that extent we call them imperfect because they do not affect our minds as much as those we call perfect, and not because they lack something of anything except that which follows from the necessity of nature of its efficient cause; and whatever follows from the necessity of the nature of its efficient cause must be necessarily be so.

    To be a master of his emotion is to attain perfection. It may not be physical but spiritual, mental and emotional. His challenges may have hardened him but enlightened him to loosen up and later, embrace the beauty of life. The unattainable perfection, was answered, through his friend Cronshaw, a poet whom he met in France, that the meaning of life cannot be answered unless one lives it. he realized that men are born, study, work, marry, have children and die is the most beautiful pattern that the Persian rug edifies.

    As for the terms “good” and “bad,” they likewise indicate nothing positive in things considered in themselves, and nothing but models of thinking, or notions which we form from comparing things with one another. For one and the same thing can at the same time be good and bad, and also indifferent. For example, music is good for one who is melancholy, bad for one in mourning, and neither good or bad for the deaf. However, although this is so, these terms ought to be retained. For since we desire to form the idea of man which we may look to as model of human nature, we shall find it useful to keep these terms in the sense I have indicated. So in what follows I shall mean by “good” that which we certainly know to be the means for our approaching nearer to the model of human nature that we set before ourselves, and by “bad” that which we certainly know prevents us from reproducing the said model. For it is important to note that when I say somebody passes from a state of less perfection, to a state of greater perfection, and vice versa, I do not mean that he changes from one essence or to form to another (for example, a horse is as completely destroyed if it changes into a man as it would be if it were to change into an insect), but that we conceive his power of activity, insofar as this is understood through his nature, to be increased or diminished.

    Philip may have been both good and bad due to circumstances. he was good in the Blackstable with his Auntie Louisa and Uncle William. he became bad in school because his classmates taunted him because of his clubfoot. In Heidelberg, he is good to all the people even if he did not understand their silence and even their insolence. In France, was forced to become bad, to protect himself from the looming abuses of other foreigners. The death of an anti-social fanny Price, showed him to be the only compassionate painting student.

    Hence, after a series of Philip’s tragedy, his experiences, his meeting with different people, his education, his travel to Heidelberg, to Paris and to London, his affluence and reversal of his fortune to poverty taught him greatest lessons in life. That life can be beautiful if man knows to master his emotion, moderate his desire and be reasonable in every decision. A man is finally freed from the chains and cufflinks ” Of Human Bondage”.

    References:

    Maughm, Somerset W. (1991). Of Human Bondage.

    Canada: Bantam Book Doubleday.

    Morgan, Michael (ed.). (2006). The Essential Spinoza: Ethics And Related Writings.

    Cambridge: Hackett Publishing, Inc.

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    Source by Wilfredo M. Valois

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  • Cervical Traction: The Best Way to Heal a Sore Neck

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    Traction is a centuries old treatment that has been administered by chiropractors for healing conditions like a sore neck or a sore back. Alternately, traction therapy may be used for decompressing any of the ailing joints.

    Who Can Use Traction Therapy

    Traction may broadly be seen as application of continuous force to stretch the spine. It is also very often used and is highly effective for treatment of musculoskeletal conditions, i.e. injuries that are not externally visible, but involve muscles, ligaments, joints, tendons, nerves, bones or the supporting structures. For muscular disorders, including muscle spasms, dislocation or for fracture, traction therapy can be very useful, and is often applied for arms, legs, back or neck.

    Traction Therapy for Neck related Issues

    In particular, traction therapy can be greatly effective for neck related problems. While neck traction is very often applied to ensure pain relief, there are various mechanisms by which it heals the neck.

    1. When traction is applied on the neck, soft tissues and joints are mobilized in the cervical spine.

    2. Alternately, it relieves pressure from the pinched nerve root by applying decompressive forces,

    3. And also reduces herniations on the spine.

    4. By applying traction, one can align any dislocations in the cervical spine, and this can effectively stabilize an injury in the cervical spine.

    5. And for anyone who has a faulty neck posture, such as the forward head posture, home traction therapy can enable the patient to get the curve in the neck again.

    6. This also works very well for anyone who suffers from conditions like military neck, wherein the curve of the neck is not bent forward, as it should ideally be. When a patient suffers from military neck, the curve of the neck is either straight or bent backwards, and with cervical traction, the patient benefits in the long term. Cervical traction not just ensures pain relief for the patient, but also increases the cervical range of motion, such that the patient can comfortably return to everyday activities.

    If one is able to treat a sore neck at home, it simply speeds up the healing process, and might even suffice in terms of treatment. Home cervical traction is advantageous because while it ensures long term pain relief, it is a non invasive treatment methodology.

    When cervical traction is administered, it relieves neck pain by stretching the soft tissue, or the tissues such as tendons, ligaments and fibrous tissue which surround, connect or support the backbone. This in turn works towards separating the spinal joint structures and ensures pain relief.

    With constant traction, the muscles are fatigued out, and the strain then rests on the joints. So with traction, the joint spaces are widened, and this induces pain relief as pressure on the cervical nerves is reduced.

    Cervical Traction: Is It Painful?

    People often wonder if traction therapy or traction devices in particular are painful. But traction therapy has been in prominence for centuries, and has worked very effectively for healing conditions like a stiff neck.

    Moreover, nowadays one can find some highly refined cervical traction devices which allow the patient to himself control the pressure. These are air inflated devices which work using a hand operated air pump, and allow the patient to adjust the air pressure to suit his needs and comfort levels.

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    Source by Harshad Jethra

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  • I’m Afraid My Husband Has Moved On And That It’s Too Late To Get Him Back: Insights That Might Help

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    I often hear from wives who want to know when it’s too late to get their husband back. Some tell me that, in their minds, it is too late because their husband has seemed to “move on.” I often hear comments like “We’ve been separated for six months. I think my husband has started seeing someone else. I’m starting to think that this is the end and that it’s too late for us. If someone has moved on, does that mean the end of the marriage?”

    Another example is something like: “My husband keeps telling me that we’re over and that it’s too late to do anything to save this marriage. Yesterday, he told me that he was moving on and that I should do the same thing. But I’m not sure how I can do this when it’s never going to be over for me. What can I do?”

    The common denominator in all of these questions and comments is that what the person asking really wants to know is when is it too late to save your marriage. Do you reach that “too late” point when your spouse tells you they have moved on? Do you have to take their word for it?

    Of course, I can’t definitively answer these questions for anyone because the answer depends on the specific people involved and the situation that they are in. But, I can offer you a perspective from my experiences and observations, which I’ll do in the following article.

    Sometimes, Couples Do Reconcile After One Of Them Has “Moved On”: If there’s anything that I know for sure in this situation, it’s that it is possible for things to change. Feelings change. Perceptions change. Situations change also. Just because someone is proclaiming or insisting something today, this doesn’t mean that they can’t do a complete about face tomorrow.

    I have seen divorced couples reconcile. I’ve seen couples who have been remarried to other people (sometimes for decent periods of time) decide to get back together. This doesn’t happen in every case, of course. But it most certainly can happen. Sometimes, there’s a change in circumstances which bring about a change of feelings. Other times, it happens spontaneously. But, much of the time, it’s part of a master plan meant to bring about small, gradual, and yet dramatic changes.

    Why Hanging On Too Tightly Can Sometimes Backfire: Wives in this situation often tell me that they just can not accept that it’s over or that he has moved on. I do understand this as I was in these shoes and I know how frustrating and painful this whole process can be. However, I can also tell you that I hear from husbands in this situation too and it’s my experience and opinion that clinging too tightly or “refusing” to accept what he’s telling you will often make him feel less loving or receptive toward you rather than more so.

    I know that it can be difficult to take step back or to pause when you’re so afraid that the second you do, he really will be gone. But sometimes, you just have to ask yourself if clinging so tightly has been working for you. Take a long look to see if your previous methods have really gained you anything.

    Sometimes, if you are honest and can maintain a little distance, you can see that actually, you’ve only been making things worse. It’s really important to ask yourself if the attempts you’ve been making have been bringing him closer to you or improving things or if they’ve been pushing him further away and deteriorating things. If this is the case, sometimes, you come to realize that trying something new isn’t as risky as it may have first appeared.

    Backing Off Or Taking Pause Is Not The Same As your Moving On: I sometimes have wives tell me things like: “maybe he’s moved on, but I will never be able to. I just can’t give up on our marriage or let go no matter what he says.” Another example is: “his moving on doesn’t mean that I have to.” All of these points are valid, but nothing says that you have to broadcast this to him. Because, when you’re asserting that you are absolutely not going to move on, then sometimes he will come to oppose you even more and think that he needs to ratchet up his efforts to change your mind. This of course, makes him move further away from you.

    So, there are times when you are better off just telling yourself that, although you know full well how you feel, you’re no longer going to keep repeating this to him when he already knows it anyway. There’s nothing wrong with appearing to back off when you know all along that your plan is to gain some ground. And, sometimes you need a pause to gain some perspective and calm.

    Taking time for yourself and taking a break from all of the drama can sometimes actually improve the situation. And sometimes, when you are suddenly silent or absent, your husband suddenly becomes interested again. This is what happened in my case, although it wasn’t by design.

    No matter which way you chose to go, it’s my experience that you are almost always better off if you are able to maintain your respect and dignity. You want to portray yourself in the strongest way possible and this often requires you to act “as if” when you just aren’t feeling it or aren’t all that confident. Sometimes, it helps to remember the person your husband loved once upon a time and to show him that person when the opportunity genuinely presents itself.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

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  • Christian Healing Ministries That Heal Stress and Addictions

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    Jesus Christ is the focus of Christian healing ministries that are freeing people from the pain associated with unhealthy lifestyles. There is no limit on the healing power of Jesus Christ. If you are seeking: healing addictions, healing sexual abuse and healing stress: Jesus cares about those things that are plaguing you and here are some Biblical steps that you can take. Spiritual healing is available that will reach deep into a person’s soul to bring healing from these common torments that are destroying the peace and joy that is available through Jesus Christ.

    Healing Stress
    Negative emotions are damaging to the body. Modern life is often characterized by a mounting sea of daily pressures and stressful events which are coming at us from every direction. However, the real culprit behind stress and stress related illnesses is not the situations and daily pressures that are bombarding us. The real culprit behind stress is the emotional reactions that we are experiencing on the inside of us. These emotions can generate sickness within our body. Negative emotions release chemical reactions in the body and the brain. These reactions affect organs on every level including the stomach, heart, large muscles, and the cells throughout the entire body. The most dangerous emotions include: un-forgiveness, depression, rage, anger, worry, fear, grief, guilt and frustration.

    What many don’t realize is that these negative emotions are sins which not only cause disease, they also separate us from God. But don’t be discouraged! There is good news in this truth and that good news is that there is a way out from disease and the entrapment of negative attitudes and emotions that may have affected our personality. Jesus died so that we can be free of sin’s penalty and from its power. We can be set free of negative emotions which cause sickness and stress by learning how to carry our negative emotions captive to Christ (2Co 10:5). Healing stress can bring forth physical healings in our bodies from diseases that we may be experiencing. It always carries us closer to Christ.

    Healing sexual abuse
    Sexual abuse is a traumatic experience that causes deep feelings of rejection within the abused person. Sins against us whether they are verbal, physical, or sexual are tremendously painful experiences which can leave us experiencing symptoms in our personalities such as shyness, perfectionism, exhibitionists, and high achievers. Healing sexual abuse is necessary in order to experience the freedom of life without seeking the approval of others. The deep-rooted pain can cause a person to hide their real self from others and even from God. Healing sexual abuse will result in meaningful relationships and purposeful lives which are filled with true intimacy with others and with God.

    Healing Addictions
    Addiction is bondage in our lives. Spiritual/emotional bondage is anything in our lives that controls us or rules us. God-and the peace and freedom He gives us-is to be our master, not sin. Some things that are good can become addictions when moderation is passed such as eating, work, relationships, shopping, prescription drugs and entertainment. Other addictions are based on things that are not good to begin with such as gambling, foul language, illegal drug use, and pornography. True freedom from addiction and healing addictions begins with allowing God to work on your emotional life and honestly admitting deep down inside that you need His help to help you surrender and stay surrendered to His leadership in your life.

    Healing stress, healing addiction, and healing sexual abuse are only possible through the power of the cross. When you receive Jesus Christ as your savior you receive the Spirit of Jesus Christ within you. Becoming a new man is not always immediately visible outwardly, but as you seek God through the truths found in the Bible you will experience freedom in your life as never before. Christ in you is the hope of glory (Col 1:27):
    To them God willed to make known what are the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles: which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.

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    Source by Scott J Thomas

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  • Can You Treat Trichotillomania With Holistic Medicine?

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    Trichotillomania is an impulse control or brain disease similar to OCD or addiction where the person pulls out their own hair. The hair can be located anywhere. Trichotillamania may be caused by trauma, rape, physical violence, torture, child abuse, and very severe emotional abuse. It may be minor and easily managed or severe. This disease can overwhelm the person. It is very important for the person with this disease to eliminate or minimize exposure to any severely negative people in their life that are abusive or exploitative. It is an emotional disorder that usually needs several therapies in order to be managed successfully. There are many alternative therapies which are untried for this illness, but these may successful due to the large emotional component of the illness. Trichotillomania seems similar to addiction, OCD, and a bad habit. Quieting the mind should be one of the goals of any therapy. Alternative therapies that quiet the mind include Yoga, scalp acupuncture, auricular acupuncture, Emotional Freedom Technique(EFT), botanical extracts, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS),and orthomolecular medicine.

    This person must be evaluated by a medical professional. A full physical and diagnostic testing of hormones and neurotransmitters must occur. This patient must be evaluated for AIDS and a brain tumor. There are several diseases that are severe enough to result in very irregular symptoms. It is extremely important to be very aggressive in treating this disease. Amino acids therapy for this may be useful and could include 5-HTP, theanine, GABA, and phenylalanine. Chinese herbal patent formulas may be considered along with Chinese liquid herbal extracts. Scalp acupuncture may be very successful in treating this type of illness. It should be done with larger needles for this type of disease. Scalp acupuncture treatments last about thirty minutes to one hour. It may take nine treatments in order to see results. Laser therapy using a cold medical grade laser may work well on this patient. You may need several sessions of cold medical grade laser therapy before you see a significant change.

    It is important for this person to sleep well and eat a well balanced diet without nitrates, amines, and food dyes. This person should avoid genetically modified foods, food additives, MSG, tumeric, and drink plenty of pure water to stay fully hydrated. The diet should allow Swiss method decaffeinated coffee or organic coffee and tea. This person should consider trying the Rotation Diet where each food may be eaten once during a four-day period. It is also a good idea to identify and reduce exposure to all allergens. You may want to consider some form of allergy treatment. Convention allergy treatments with shots is one alternative. NAET is a non-painful alternative that incorporates chiropractic and acupuncture with a special diet to treat allergens. This person needs consider a form of regular exercise like the walking, gym, biking, Bikram yoga, hiking, and dancing.

    ©Dr R Stone, MD-India

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    Source by R Stone

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  • Traditional Chinese Medicine: Acupuncture Points and Charts

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    What Are the Acupuncture Points?

    The English translation of ‘acupuncture points’ is not very accurate. Acupuncture is one of the many healing methods used in traditional Chinese Medicine. It inserts fine needles into the sensitive points on the body to stimulate Jingluos (meridians) to cure diseases. These sensitive points are called ‘Shuxue’ or ‘Xuewei’ in Chinese Medicine, meaning ‘the transmitting points’. However, this name has been so widely used, there is no point to change it now for our discussion.

    Acupuncture points are the responsive points or sensitive points on the meridians and other parts of the body. They are the special locations where energy is transmitted between the inner structures and the surface of the body. These spots can reflect disease or unhealthy conditions by giving forth painful sensations when touched or pressed. These points are (but not limited to) where the therapists apply treatments. When the body is deficient of positive energy, negative or harmful energy will be able to invade the body through these spots, causing illness. Stimulating the related points can boost and mobilize the positive energy, balance Yin/Yang energy and cure the disease. There are three types of points:

    1. 14-main-meridian points

    2. Extraordinary points

    3.’Yes’ points.

    The 14-main-meridian points are the spots on the 12 main meridians plus the spots on the governor and conception vessels. Each spot has a unique name and a fixed location. They are the main acupuncture points. The extraordinary points are the points that have names and fixed locations. These locations are not on a particular meridian. ‘Yes’ points are also called pain points, but they don’t have names or fixed locations. They are the sensitive points related to the diseases. The ‘yes ‘name came from a story. When treating a patient, the doctor pressed a spot unintentionally, and the patient uttered ‘oh yes’.

    There are approximately 360 acupuncture points in total on the human body. With so many tiny points to remember, one can easily be intimidated. As a matter of fact, for self -healing and caring purposes, we don’t have to memorize all these points. We only need to remember roughly 20 most used and effective points. If you need to use more points, just look for them using the meridian and acupuncture point charts. Each point has a unique and meaningful name, which gives some key information about this particular point, such as main function, usage, location, or other. In English, the English spelling of the Chinese names are directly used. For people who don’t understand Chinese, it is hard to comprehend the significance of each name and, therefore hard to remember all the foreign sounding names.The format of the international symbols for acupuncture points is fairly easy. Since most of the points belong to one specific meridian (Jing), it only makes sense that their symbols are associated with those meridians. You can take two abbreviation letters of that meridian’s name and number all the points along the way, from the starting point to the end point. For example: the name of the Xue-hai point means ‘the sea of blood’ in Chinese and can be used for blood-related issues. Its English symbol is SP10, because it belongs to the spleen meridian and is the 10thpoint from the start.

    How to Find an Acupuncture Point?

    When considering an acupuncture point as a tiny point, it might be really difficult to find it. However, if you think of it as a small precise area, it becomes quite easy. To locate a subject on a 2D plane, you need 2 coordinates. To locate an sensitive point, we use a reference point and a distance. The reference point is a known location on the body, such as ‘the tip of the nose’, ‘the highest point of the ankle bone’ etc. The distance is measured by your own hand. The unit is ‘cun’. The width of your thumb at the mid joint is one ‘cun’, the width of middle three fingers at the mid joints is two ‘cun’, the width of the four fingers (without the thumb) at mid joints is three ‘cun’. How do you know if you have found the right point? When you press on it, if you feel kind of sore and sense a little pain (acute pain means you are not well somewhere), then you are on the right spot. Every main meridian has a primary point. That is the point where the primary energy of this meridian originates. Stimulating this point is one of the most effective ways to boost the positive energy found in this meridian.

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    Source by Wendy Q Wang

    Views: 1

  • When Your Husband Leaves You Without Any Warning

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    I often get correspondence from wives who are now living alone but who never saw this coming. Generally, they will come home from work or from running errands one day and find that their husband has left them. Or, the husband will abruptly pack his bags and announce that the marriage is no longer working for him and he thinks that he might “want out.” However this plays out, often the wife will tell me that she had no real warning and that this was very much an abrupt and unwelcome surprise.

    I often hear things like “I can’t believe he left me. I never really saw this coming. I knew we had issues, but every married couple has issues. I just can’t believe that he would leave me without ever trying to work things out. And, I don’t know where to go from here. I don’t want a divorce. I want him to come back home, but I’m so angry that he didn’t try to approach me first that I don’t even know how to approach him. What should I do?”

    The answer to this question is going to depend upon the circumstances and the people involved. But, it will often help to deal directly with the real situation that is in front of you, rather than trying to deal with the situation that you envision or hope exists. I will discuss this more in the following article.

    Don’t Focus Only On The Fact That You Had No Warning When He Left. Focus On What To Do Now And Where To Go From Here: It’s completely normal to be floored by the fact that one morning you woke up with a husband living at home, but by evening you were alone without any warning. This is an abrupt blow that can be devastating. But, because it can be important to act quickly, you will often have to make a conscious decision not to focus on the way in which this happened.

    Yes, your husband could most certainly have handled this in a different and preferable way, but neither of you can change that now. There’s a real risk in allowing your reaction to how he handled this to interfere with how you act toward him in the present. It can really help to ask yourself what your ultimate goal is in this situation. Some women will just want to handle themselves with dignity and grace while coping and moving on in the best way that they know how.

    Others will decide that their primary goal is to get their husband to come back home as quickly as possible. Often, what will help with one of these goals will also help with the other. No matter what you decide that you ultimately want, it’s my experience that you will often have an easier time getting it if you focus on what is right in front of you rather than the manner in which it happened. Yes, being blindsided is very painful and shocking, but it can hurt rather than help the situation to dwell on this rather than taking action.

    Evaluating What Is Going To Most Improve Your Situation: Once you’ve decided where you want to go from here, it’s important to step back and to try to take the emotion out of it to come up with the strategy that is most likely to get you what you want. It’s so easy to lash out, feel resentful, and to feel sorry for yourself. But these things usually won’t get you any closer to what you want. In fact, allowing your feelings to run your actions will often keep you from getting what you want.

    Debating with your husband, arguing with him, or lashing out will often push him even further away and just make you more upset with your situation. It’s usually better, at least in my experience and observation, to try as best as you can to limit yourself to the actions that strengthen you and allow you to feel in control rather than to surrender to those feelings or actions that are natural (and may relieve some tension) but which will only make the situation worse.

    It’s usually when you can somewhat rise above this and handle yourself with strength and calm that you will often begin to gain some ground. I absolutely know that this can be difficult. Sometimes, you might need to wait to interact with your husband until you can actually be calm. This may not be possible in the very beginning. But it can really help to always keep in mind your ultimate goal so that you don’t lose control of your strategy.

    Interacting With Your Husband During This Difficult Situation: It’s probably fair to say that there will come a time when you will need to communicate with your husband about where your marriage is going from here. Whether it’s fair or not, your husband has sent a clear message by leaving. Now, it’s up to you as to how you are going to reply to that message. But, before you do, define how you ultimately want for this to turn out. If you could put aside the shock, the hurt, and the fear, what is your greatest wish right now? The answer to this question is what you must place your focus upon.

    Because I would argue that no matter what your ultimate goal is, you’ll usually get closer to it by trying to interact with him in a positive way. Even if you are ultimately going to end the marriage, this was an important relationship in your life and it will likely help you going forward if you can keep this as positive as you can. If you want to save the marriage, improving your relationship and communications going forward will go a long way toward helping you to eventually save your marriage.

    There is absolutely nothing wrong with telling your husband that although you’re devastated that he would leave you without warning, you would like to interact with him in a positive way going forward. Since the two of you were once the most important people in one another’s lives (and may well still be) it just doesn’t make sense to allow for one negative action to turn into something that is even worse. He may not be all that receptive to this at first, but when he sees that you’re not reacting as he anticipated and are working with him rather than against him, you will sometimes be able to slowly rebuild with time. This is often true even if you are not 100% sure how you want to approach him right now.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

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