Tag: Mindful

  • Residents In Lagos, Abuja, Can Still Withdraw Cash During Lockdown, Minister Says

    Residents In Lagos, Abuja, Can Still Withdraw Cash During Lockdown, Minister Says

    ATM withdrawal
    ATM withdrawal

    Residents In Lagos, Abuja, Can Still Withdraw Cash During Lockdown, Minister Says 1ATM withdrawal


    A joint statement by Minister of Finance, Zainab Ahmed, and Governor of Central Bank of Nigeria, Godwin Emefiele, has said e-payment and ATM platforms will remain open during the restriction on movement in Lagos, FCT and Ogun State.

    The monetary and fiscal policy heads said exemptions have been obtained from President Muhammadu Buhari to allow very skeletal operations in the financial system and money markets.

    They directed that all relevant staff of affected outfits and agencies should look out for further instructions from their immediate bosses.

    The statement reads, “To ensure that Nigerians can still perform online transactions and use ATMs whilst observing these restrictions, we will like to inform the general public and all affected stakeholders that we have obtained exemptions from the President to allow very skeletal operations in the Financial System and Money Markets in order to keep the system in light operations during this time.

    “We are mindful of the difficulties these restrictions would bring on ordinary Nigerians and are grateful to the President for approving these exemptions, which should help ease some of these burdens.

    “We urge all Nigerians to be patient, cooperative and united as all hands are on deck to defeat this virus.”

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    Residents In Lagos, Abuja, Can Still Withdraw Cash During Lockdown, Minister Says
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  • He Hasn’t Said I Love You Yet? What This Really Means for Your Relationship

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    There’s a very special moment in every romantic relationship that a woman holds her breath for. It’s when your man tells you he loves you. Ideally, he’ll say it first and it will happen in a wonderful, memorable place. You’ll remember everything about the second those fateful words left his lips. The shirt he was wearing, how his hair was styled and what his cologne smelled like will all become important nuances of the moment when you both knew that you were going to be life partners. It all sounds so dreamy and ideal, doesn’t it? From experience, most of us know that it typically doesn’t go that way. He’ll usually blurt out the words at the most inopportune time like when we’re stopped at a red light or during a football game. Regardless of the circumstances of the delivery, the words are still meaningful and relationship changing. Sadly, not all men reach a point where they feel comfortable sharing those words. If it’s now been months or even years and he hasn’t said I love you yet, what exactly does that mean for you and your future with him?

    Never Forget How Different You and Your Man Are

    I’ve often heard women say that they wish men were more like them. In some ways, that would be wonderful, but essentially we love men because they are men. Your man doesn’t process his feelings the same way you do. If he falls in love with you at first sight, chances are very good that he’s not going to share that news with you until months into the relationship. The same is true of the man who falls in love with his woman at a slow pace. He’s not going to give you updates about what he’s feeling. Men just aren’t wired that way.

    Sharing deep and meaningful feelings to a man makes him feel emotionally vulnerable. It’s very much like he’s taking the armor off his heart and he’s putting himself in the line of fire. If you don’t react favorably to his declaration of adoration or if you say something hurtful, it will pain him in a way that nothing else could. A man needs to feel very secure in his relationship before he’ll be ready to blurt out that he loves you.

    Pay Close Attention to His Actions Rather Than His Words

    So much can be gained from really paying close attention to how your man acts when he’s around you. There are certain behavior patterns that sync with a man who is truly and madly in love. You may believe that he’s not in love unless he says the words, but don’t discount how he treats you. For a man who is struggling with opening himself up to the point where he does indeed feel very vulnerable, his actions can give you great insight into what is in his heart.

    A telling example is the man who rushes through his day so that he can spend as much time as possible with the woman he adores. Nothing matters quite as much to him as seeing her smiling face at the end of his workday. The same is true of the man who sends a few text messages or emails during the day. His mind is clearly on the woman he cares for. Any small gestures like this should be viewed for what they are and that’s a strong sign that his heart is focused on the woman in his life.

    See His Commitment to You as a Sign of What’s in His Heart

    If a man has stopped dating other women and his focus is always just on you, he’s smitten. Men are notorious for wanting to play the field. Once a man stops looking, thinking about and seeing other women you should take note of that. He may not have said that he loves you outright but the fact that he’s lost interest in other attractive women speaks volumes about how he views you.

    This is especially clear if he’s suggested that you don’t see other guys or that you two just date exclusively. If he does mention this, it obviously means that he wants you to himself and that generally has a lot more to do with a man’s heart than his ego.

    A man in love wants to draw a tight circle around the woman who is the center of his world. He doesn’t want the threat of any other men on the horizon and he doesn’t have eyes for any other women either. His focus is clear and he’ll ask you to focus on him too.

    Be Wary of a Man Who Doesn’t Seem Connected Emotionally to You

    As much as you want to hope that he does love you, even if he has yet to say it, you do need to be mindful of the fact that his reluctance to express it is based on the fact that he just doesn’t feel it. If you’ve told your boyfriend that you love him and you’re met with dead silence, or he changes the subject very quickly, it’s easy to jump to the assumption that he isn’t in love and just is very uncomfortable talking about the subject at all.

    Some men will work hard at avoiding any discussion about feelings. They’ll say things like, “I’m not ready for a serious relationship yet, ” or “love is overrated.” If your guy has expressed similar sentiments to you, you have every right to be discouraged by that. He’s telling you, in a very roundabout and non-compassionate way that he’s just not feeling the same things you are.

    It’s up to you to determine whether or not you want to continue to invest yourself in a relationship like this. Granted, over time his position may change and he may decide that he does indeed love you. Perhaps a bit of time apart, as in a short-term relationship “break” might help him see the light. There’s a chance it won’t though.

    Just remember that all men are different and even though some are quick to say those three meaningful words, other men just can’t fathom saying, “I love you,” to any woman unless they’re on the verge of proposing to her. It’s up to you to decipher your man’s actions and read between the limes to truly see what’s in his heart.

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    Source by Gillian Reynolds

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  • Relationships: Can A Relationship Bring Up Someone’s Attachment Trauma?

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    When someone gets into a relationship, they may believe that they have finally met their match. What they have been through in the past, when it comes to this area of their life, is then going to be well and truly over.

    At one point, it will have been as though they were on a stormy sea and now, they will be on calm waters. There is then going to be no more bumps – the path in front of them will be completely flat.

    An Unexpected Outcome

    However, although this may be how one currently sees this area of their life, it doesn’t mean that their external world will match up with what is taking place in their mind as time goes by. What they could find is that their partner ends up pulling away as time goes by or that they come up too strong.

    If the former takes place, one could end up feeling rejected and abandoned, and what may follow is the feeling of being worthless. Yet, if the latter takes place, they could end up feeling smothered and trapped, which could result in them feeling powerless.

    Confusion

    If something like this was to take place, the first thing that one could do is to blame their partner. Instead of stepping back and reflecting on what is taking place, what is going on externally will be seen as the issue.

    As a result of this, their partner could end up reacting negatively to what they say, creating even more disharmony. Another thing that could take place is that the relationship could simply come to an end.

    A Similar Scenario

    At the same time, while one of the occurrences above could be what has taken place, it could be slightly different. So, instead of them feeling rejected and abandoned because their partner has actually pulled away, they could feel this way if their partner has a lot going on at work, for instance, and is unable to spend as much time with them as they usually would.

    And, while they could be feeling smothered and trapped due to their partner coming on too strong, they could feel this way whenever they express their needs. No matter what is going on, then, it will lead to a fair amount of internal discomfort.

    The Early Stages

    If one was fine before they got into a relationship with this person, they may wonder what is going on. But, while they may have been fine up until this point, there is also the chance that it is not this black and white.

    They may have only been seeing this person for a few weeks and had number of intense experiences during this time. Perhaps there was time when they didn’t hear from them for a little while, with this resulting in them feeling fearful and as though they had been rejected.

    Attached

    This may have been a time when they simply reacted to how they were feeling, doing what they could to get the other person to respond. Alternatively, they may have pushed down how they felt and tried to act normal.

    Their need to make a good impression at this point may have stopped them from criticising the other person. Based on how they felt, the last thing they would have wanted was for them to stop talking to them altogether.

    One Outlook

    One way of looking at what took place earlier on and/or what is taking place now that they are in a relationship would be to say that one is simply overacting. Ergo, the best thing for them to do would be to make sure that they don’t get caught up their ‘irrational’ feelings.

    One could end up coming to believe that they need to be mindful of what is taking place in their head, due to the fact that their thoughts create their feelings. It is then going to be all about what is going on up top.

    A Deeper Look

    Another way of looking at this would be to say that the reason all these feelings have been coming up is because they have become emotionally attached to another person, which has allowed their early wounds to be brought up to the surface. Consciously, one may not see the other person as their caregiver, but unconsciously, this can be exactly how they see them.

    At a deeper level, part of them will look towards their partner to give them what their caregivers didn’t give them, and when this doesn’t happen, how they felt during their early years will come back up to the surface. And not only will how they felt during their early years be triggered when their partner doesn’t behave in a certain way, this can also take place even if this part of them assumes that something has taken place.

    Deep Pain

    There is then going to be no need for clear evidence to be provided in order for their early wounds to be opened up. What complicates this even further is that although this part of them will want to receive what it didn’t receive all those years ago, experiencing the same experiences over and over again will be what feels safe.

    When their wounds are opened up, they can end up feeling like a needy and dependent child. Perhaps their early years were a time in their life when their needs were rarely, if ever met, meaning that they would have been spent a lot of time feeling rejected and abandoned.

    Awareness

    The years will have passed since that stage of their life but the trauma that they experienced will still be within them. If one can relate to this and they want to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support.

    This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer.

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    Source by Oliver JR Cooper

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  • Business Ethics for the Mindful Dance Professional

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    Once upon a time, a dance teacher opened her own studio down the road from her former employer’s school, taking advantage of her former teaching position to start her own studio. Sound familiar? This is an all too common story in the dance studio business and unfortunately, this is no fairy-tale.

    We have all heard a version of this story or perhaps experienced it first-hand. Poaching students–direct or indirect solicitation of another’s students–is a practice that mindlessly fragments and divides the dance community. In addition to poaching students, other subtle, but just as divisive, practices include: making negative remarks about other teachers/schools, misrepresentation of the self by making false, exaggerated, or ambiguous claims, and making disparaging comparisons or references about others.

    What drives otherwise enterprising individuals to engage in business practices that burn bridges, sow the seeds of deceit, and model mindless behavior?

    Darwin. You heard me–Darwin is to blame. Well, not really Darwin himself, but the misinterpretation of his theories into a business context is at the root of this dilemma. When the business world adopted the neo-Darwinian philosophy of “survival of the fittest”, they unleashed a ready-made excuse for unethical action.

    As a culture that witnessed the “cola wars” first hand, we picked up the idea that anything goes when it comes to business and marketing. Ethics and morals need not apply. “That’s business” they say while defending their actions. They fail to see the big picture: to look mindfully at the situation. They unknowingly hurt the larger dance profession and therefore themselves. It is a case of one’s right hand shooting one’s left and thinking this is good.

    What makes one feel justified in approaching the business of dance studios in this mindless manner?

    At the root of the neo-Darwinian business approach is a sense of isolation and scarcity. These teachers believe that it is “them against the world”–or, more directly, “them against the other local studios/teachers.” Add to this sense of isolation a sense of scarcity–that there are not enough students to go around–and you start to understand how one begins to rationalize why stealing students is necessary for survival. However, these twin concepts–isolation and scarcity–are illusions in the dance world.

    Studios fighting over the same group of students create a negative atmosphere in the community. Parents sense this negativity and choose alternative activities for their children because they seem more wholesome: the potential young dancer takes up soccer. However, in a community where more than one dance school thrives without negativity, a greater number of students enjoy dance as an activity. This greater number of students translates down the road into a greater number of future dancers, dance teachers, and, most importantly, audience members. If dance studios stopped seeing each other so much as competitors and more as colleagues, the entire dance profession would benefit.

    The solution starts as simply as making replacements: replacing mindless competition with mindful collegiality, mindless isolation with mindful interconnectedness, and mindless scarcity with mindful abundance. We must realize that the dance profession, from the smallest recreational dance class to the largest professional company, is interconnected. The entire web of the dance world is vitally linked.

    For example, the dance community is rather small in comparison with the larger world of sports. There are many more children participating in sports than the arts. Rather than interpreting this as a reason to fight for resources, we should embrace a sense of abundance. There are more than enough potential students out there to sustain every school if we focus on bringing more students into dance rather than fighting over those already there. It is to the benefit of the dance profession at every level to include more of the non-dance world inside our walls rather than put up walls within our own.

    So, how can we begin to break down the twin illusions of isolation and scarcity in the dance studio world and open our eyes to interconnectedness and abundance?

    We need to base our actions and practices on ideals that reflect the dance world as a healthy and vibrant community rather than a dire and hopeless one that lends itself to mindless behavior. Adopting a code of ethics that reinforces a mindful and wholesome outlook will not just serve as guidelines, but also help promote a positive environment for those whom they effect.

    Going forward, we all need to embrace a code of ethics that addresses these issues. The following list is nowhere near complete, but it is a place to start.

    Business Ethics for the Mindful Dance Professional

    In all professional and business relations, the dance professional shall exhibit respect, honesty, and integrity for themselves, clients, and colleagues.

    A. Respect

    A dance professional shall refrain from making negative remarks that may discredit, malign, or in any way cast reflection on the professional standing of another school/studio or teacher.

    A dance professional shall refrain from making any disparaging references to, or disparaging comparisons with, the services of others

    A dance professional shall refrain from publishing, or causing to be published, any notice, newspaper advertisement, or any other matter likely to damage or depreciate the reputation of any colleague.

    B. Honesty

    A dance professional shall accurately portray his or her qualifications or affiliations to the public especially in advertising material and avoid any ambiguity or exaggeration.

    A dance professional shall refrain from portraying his or her qualifications or affiliations to the public in a way intended to deceive the uninitiated. For example: having danced a child role in the Nutcracker with a professional company and listing it as to portray having danced professionally with the company.

    C. Integrity

    A dance professional shall refrain from directly soliciting business from another teacher or studio by approaching, in any manner the pupil, pupils or employees of another teacher and, for any reason at all, to try to induce them to join his/her school.

    A dance professional shall refrain from indirectly soliciting business from another teacher or studio by making adverse criticism against other teachers’ methods, by offering free coaching, by citing the advantages to be gained by the pupil from the change (e.g. offering roles/parts), or other similar methods.

    With each of us taking responsibility for our own actions by embracing a mindful ethical base, we can co-create a healthier, connected, and abundant environment in the business of dance schools. Moreover, with all we have in common, we might just discover we make better friends than enemies.

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    Source by James Robey

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