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  • Sex Drive, Sex Addiction And Anger

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    In psychiatry, we do a mental state examination that is quite like a physical examination. In it, one of the questions we ask of every patient is- How is your sexual appetite? In many parts of the world this question can be considered offensive especially when asked by the member of the opposite sex. But in the western world, people can talk freely about it. So in psychiatry, one has to be respectful of the culture one is working in.

    The importance of this question is that sexual drive determines the mental health of a person. In most psychiatric conditions, the drive is reduced. This happens in depression and anxiety conditions including post-traumatic stress disorder. In certain conditions like mania, it increases. In a person who is not manic, but has an unhealthy, elevated sexual drive, it is considered to be a sign of an addiction. An addiction has the quality of being compulsive and it is in excess to the norm. This excess starts damaging the person’s financial, social and personal condition. In such situations, it is a sign of ill health.

    In my experience, sex drive is the indicator of the physical and mental tension a person carries. When the tension increases to the extent that the body and the nervous system start getting tired, the drive reduces. If the tension is reduced, the drive comes back. In my experience, this happens typically in people who suffer with depression. Depression, is suppressed anger. When a depressed person, having low sex drive, starts releasing anger, the nervous system experiences a release and the sex drive or libido is increased as a result.

    Excessive sexual drive is the result of excessive tension or stress being produced in the body. The fact that regular physical exercise produces a healthy sex drive is a clinically known fact. When the tension is increased in the body, as happens in anger and following physical exercise, there is an upsurge in sex hormones. At that stage, the drive can become excessive. Despite having regular sexual partners, such people will feel the need to masturbate frequently to reduce their nervous tension. Such people are usually normal individuals except that they are torn inside with guilt about masturbation. If such people were to do nothing about their ‘sex addiction’, they would end up being depressed. This is because the body has a limit to tolerate tension. When the limit is reached,the nervous system becomes fatigued and features of depression kick in.

    In medical practice, medicines can be prescribed to control the excessive sexual drive. In my work, I have used meditation and imagery exercises to help the patients reduce their anger. The reduction in their sexual drive is a natural spontaneous follow up.

    Many years ago, there was an earthquake in the region of California. In the studies done at that time, scientists were perplexed to learn that immediately after the earthquake, the survivors reported a surge in their sexual drives. The reason for this, as I understand is this. Sex is an activity that is gift from nature to the animal world to continue with the progeny. During times of danger, the survival of the species or individual is threatened. This causes an anger drive that is necessary to undo the effects of the danger. Testosterone is a typical male hormone that increases muscle tension and produces energy in the body. Its secretion is increased at such times too. In order for the progeny to continue, reproductive activity has to take place. So there is a consequent increase in sexual drive.

    On the other hand, what would happen, if the anger tension is considerably reduced in the body? In all kinds of spiritual literature, there is emphasis on celibacy. Some religions enforce it on their followers. This is so because if you meditate regularly, the body’s physical and mental needs reduce considerably. There is also a reduction in anger levels and the body’s tension. The sexual drive reduces as a result. In such cases reduction in sexual drive is a sign of excellent mental health rather than the sign of mental illness. In spiritual literatures, sex is not a weakness because it provides pleasure, but because it is a sign of tension. Spiritual practices, like meditation, reduce this tension. Engaging in sex is a ‘weakness’ from anger/tension perspective in spirituality. It has nothing to do with denial of pleasure.

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    Source by Pradeep Chadha

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  • Relationship Anxiety – Why Doesn’t My Boyfriend Want to Marry Me?

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    Relationships aren’t always viewed as investments, but in many ways that’s exactly what they are. This is especially the case for a woman who is dating a man who is somewhat resistant to the idea of marriage. If you’re that woman, you know that you’ve invested a great deal of time and emotional energy into the connection. It’s understandable that you’d want and expect a diamond ring and a romantic wedding at some point, but what do you do if that end goal is nowhere in sight? If your boyfriend has made it clear to you that he’s not interested in marriage, you’re left flabbergasted. Before you throw in the towel and walk away from everything you two have built, you need some answers. Understanding why he isn’t feeling drawn towards marriage can help you overcome the problem and get things moving in a more positive relationship direction.

    Think About His Reasons for Not Wanting to Marry

    Obviously, by this point you and your boyfriend have discussed the issue of marriage and how you both feel about it. In all likelihood you’ve pushed your boyfriend to share with you where his reservations are coming from. Each man is unique which means that his reasoning for not wanting to take the plunge is going to be specific to him. Generally there are several common threads that seem to run through relationships in which the man isn’t in any rush to get married.

    One of the most common reasons why men refuse to make such a strong commitment is they sense that they’ll lose their own identity when they become a “husband.” Instead of being a self sufficient, single guy they suddenly become one half of a couple who are joined together forever. To most women this sounds like a dream come true but for a man who doesn’t feel emotionally mature, this can be a very frightening proposition. Not only does he see his own identity being pulled away but he senses that his role, from the wedding day forward, is simply to please his wife.

    Other men won’t get down on bended knee to make that all-important proposal because the financial aspect of it weighs heavily on their mind. Men want to be viewed as providers and if your man doesn’t have the means to support himself, let alone you and any potential children in the future, he isn’t going to want to take any steps towards commitment. He also likely won’t reveal his true motivations for not getting engaged. He doesn’t want you to think poorly of him. To a man the most important thing is that the woman he loves sees him as a hero in every sense.

    Devote Your Energy to Helping Him Overcome His Resistance

    There’s something to be said for not pushing a man to commit, but there are obvious exceptions every woman should be aware of. If you believe your boyfriend would love to be married, but he does have some lingering reservations that you’ve been able to identify, you can then start work on helping him move past those.

    It’s not advisable for you to sit down with a man who you believe is struggling with finances so you two can have an honest discussion about how he can’t afford a wedding, let alone an engagement ring. It is helpful if you share with him how you see marriage as an equal partnership and how important it is to you to contribute equally, always. If your boyfriend feels that some of the financial burden has been taken off his shoulders, in a very subtle way by you, that may steer him closer towards a proposal.

    You can also persuade your man to see the gains he’ll make in being married to you, as opposed to the losses he may believe he’ll suffer. If your guy is surrounded by single male friends, this may prove a bit more challenging, but don’t ever view it as impossible.

    Simply start mentioning how important you believe it is that couples always have their own interests. You could even bring up the example of a married friend of yours. Talk about how you think it’s great that her and her husband still have their own independent friends and that they each spend time apart from one another visiting with those friends.

    If your boyfriend senses that your attitude after you marry is going to be that of a woman who doesn’t want her husband spending all his time with her, he’ll be more inclined to see marriage in a much more positive light.

    Be Realistic About the Future of Your Relationship

    Even if you’ve determined why you believe your boyfriend is being hesitant about committing, and you’ve been working at getting him to move past his reservations, there is still a chance that he’ll refuse to marry you.

    If this is the case, it’s important that you look within yourself to decide if waiting endlessly is the right thing for you. Some people just don’t see marriage as something they want in their lives. If this depth of connection is important to you and your boyfriend has continued to resist, even after you’ve helped him understand the benefits of it, it may be time to rethink your future.

    You, and only you, can decide if marriage is a deal breaker within your relationship. If it’s vitally important to you that you two marry, share that with him and leave the ball in his court. If he continues to ignore your needs, you really have to consider whether a partner like that is truly the best choice after all.

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    Source by Gillian Reynolds

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  • Population Distribution or Structure II – Sex, Occupational and Geographical Distributions

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    Sex distribution

    The sex distribution refers to the classification of a given population according to sex or gender (male or female). Sex distribution can easily be obtained from a population census of a given country which shows the total number of males and the total number of females.

    A knowledge of the total number of makes and females in a country will assist the government to make the necessary plans to cater for the population. If, for example, the population of the female is higher than that of the males, it means government will have to plan to provide goods and services for more people because such a country will give rise to high population. Nature has, however tried to balance the number of males with that of the female in such a way that the differences in number between the two is usually very small.

    Occupational distributions

    Occupational distribution of a population refers to the classification of the working population into different types of work they engage in. The occupational distribution in any population is influenced by a number of factors. These include:

    1. The level of education

    2. Availability of natural resources

    3. The level of technology

    4. The types of productive activities.

    The major types of productive activities are primary (extractive), manufacturing, construction, commercial, direct and indirect services. In west Africa for instance, majority of the occupationally distributed population are found in farming, mining fishing and lumbering.

    Geographical distribution

    Geographical distribution of a given population refers to the spread of people into separate geographical areas within a country. The distribution may be due to occupational, presence of mineral resources, historical factors, seat of government, availability of social amenities etc. Reasons for high population density due to geographical distribution are: favorable climate, fertile soil, natural attachment/historical factors, administrative headquarters, employment opportunities, presence of minerals, presence of industries, presence of social amenities and infrastructure, commercial activities and migration.

    Economic Implications or Effects of Increase in the Population of Dependants

    The Dependants are the population that are between 0-17 years, which include the infants, pupils in nursery, primary, secondary and those in tertiary institutions, and the old age (over 60 years that are not working) but depend on the working population (18-60 years) to cater for all their needs or requirement. If the population of the dependents is higher than that of the working class it has the following economic implications: high taxation, increase in prices, increase in government expenditures, low savings, low investment, fall in standard of living, increase in demand for goods and services, increase in imports, decrease in exports and low supply of labor.

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    Source by Funom Makama

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  • My Wife Never Says She Loves Me – Does This Mean That My Marriage Is About to Be Over?

    My Wife Never Says She Loves Me – Does This Mean That My Marriage Is About to Be Over?

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    Are you stuck in a marriage, scratching your head in wonderment, saying my wife never says she loves me?

    If you’re in this position and you’re worried about your marriage going downhill fast, then you really need to pay special attention right now.

    This could mean trouble…

    Should I Panic If My Wife never Says She Loves Me

    Now here’s the thing. This could mean terrible trouble for your marriage, but it could also be absolutely nothing. You may be panicking and your wife just isn’t the type of person who goes around say I love you all the time.

    That does happen.

    However it still means that there’s a lot of room for improvement and it also tells me that your wife doesn’t adore you. You’re not the man that makes her swoon anymore. That’s especially apparent if she USED TO say I love you all the time, and now she’s stopped.

    So you’ve got some work to do either way. You can turn this around.

    Now here’s the thing that must happen first. You must accept responsibility, and take some of the blame that YOU haven’t the things that you could be doing that make a woman…and yes even a wife,..melt when she sees you.

    Most men mistakenly think that this is something that automatically goes away just because you’ve been married for a while. Nothing could be further from the truth. Just think, you’ve had all this time with your wife, so she should be completely and totally obsessed with you at this point if you think about it.

    But don’t worry, because you probably didn’t even realize this was possible. And you’re not alone. I too thought this was the norm. I was happy just to get along with my wife, until I realize that I could make her love me more, become nearly obsessed with me, and well…be completely attracted to me. And you know what that means!

    Here’s what it takes. It takes being the man that your wife truly wants. It means being the type of man that makes women obsessed with them. We’ve all seen them. And usually us guys make the mistake of thinking it’s because of looks, or money, or material things.

    Not even close to true, and I’m sure you can think of example to prove that. I’m sure you can think of those guys who always have women swooning over them and you sit there and think…why? How the heck is the guy doing it?

    The Secret to Making Your Wife Swoon

    Here’s the secret right here in this article, that could absolutely change your married life forever.

    The thing is that your wife must be attracted to you before she can get those fuzzy feelings of obsession for you. And the type of man that she is attracted to, down to her core…down to her DNA…is an alpha man who is (or at least seems to be) in charge.

    A leader is what your wife is looking for. Of course it’s so buried down deep in her DNA that she really doesn’t even get this. She thinks that all of these things that society makes her believe is what she wants, but the proof always shows up when a man starts acting like the alpha male that she really wants. It’s an amazing transformation, and you’ll quickly stop even worrying about having to say my wife never says she loves me because she’ll be showing it in more ways than one.

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    Source by Jason T. Nelson

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  • Is She Addicted to Sex Toys? The Truth About Women Who Prefer "Toys" Over Sex With You!

    Is She Addicted to Sex Toys? The Truth About Women Who Prefer "Toys" Over Sex With You!

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    Is she addicted to sex toys? Does she prefer “time alone” over time with you? What does it mean when your girlfriend, wife or lover seems to value alone time more than sexual intercourse?

    Any of these questions sound familiar? If you are anything like the millions of men who worry about their ability to satisfy their partner in the sack, the truth is, a woman who enjoys sexual “props”, especially in her alone time, can be a very intimidating thing.

    Why? Because for many men, it signals that they may NOT be doing things right, and that their woman is quite literally, taking her sexual satisfaction into her own hands.

    Is it possible for a woman to become “addicted” to sex toys?

    The truth is, like any other pleasurable behavior that can become an obsession, or compulsive, it is.

    The good news?

    It’s rare, and a woman who really does compulsively use any sort of instrument of self pleasure in a hyper active way, typically is NOT doing it for the orgasm or sexual sensations alone. Usually, it’s a sign of hyper compulsive sex drive, and often, other deeper and unrelated psychological issues.

    The BAD news?

    The REAL issue that men worry about is genuine. Many women DO turn to masturbation, be it through using a “toy” or otherwise, simply because they are not able to climax during sex.

    The reasons that women report NOT being able to orgasm with their partner during sex?

    In a highly publicized sexual survey done in late 2012, the big reasons women privately reported for preferring a sexual toy like a vibrator OVER partner sex were the following.

    1 – Their male partners climaxed too quickly. It’s no surprise that sexual stamina and staying power remains the #1 complaint women make about bad sex.

    2 – Their partners were “doing it wrong.” Believe it or not, especially with men UNDER 30, lack of sexual skill is one of the most common reasons why a woman can’t have an orgasm, and ultimately resorts to using an aide like a vibrator later, in private. (often when our man has fallen asleep, or the next morning when he’s gone)

    3 – Poor “body part” compatibility. Many men simply aren’t properly endowed to satisfy their partners during sex. The truth is, about 80% of women have difficulty achieving orgasm due to size or stamina issues with their present partners. They aren’t able to hit the right spots… and even if they are, they can’t last long enough to bring her to orgasm.

    Many women are simply not willing to compromise the “climax” part of the sexual experience any longer, and will resort to ensuring that they DO get their own release, often by ourselves!

    Lastly, sex toys WORK! With so much myth and misinformation out there about the female orgasm, the truth is, more than 90% of women report being able to orgasm each and every time when using a toy or sexual prop.

    Compare this against the abysmally bad rates women report being able to climax during “real” sex, it’s no big surprise that so many of us now seemed “addicted” to our erotic aides and prefer more “alone” time than we let you know!

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    Source by Amy A.

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