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Tag: love

  • Two Relationship Killers

    Two Relationship Killers

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    Consider a primary relationship in your life where you love someone and they love you. This could be an intimate partnership, a child-parent relationship or a very close friendship. Here are the two things to avoid, if you want to make sure love is present at all times.

    Relationship killer #1:

    Firstly, you should never expect that because someone loves you, they need to sacrifice themselves for you and put your needs first. We often mistakenly think that the degree to which someone suffers is a testimony for the amount of love they have for us. Likewise, we mistakenly believe that if someone puts their needs first, they don’t love us. But that is not true at all. If I refuse to sacrifice myself for you, it doesn’t mean I don’t love you. It simply means I am clear on what works for me and what doesn’t, and I don’t mess with my own needs. Please don’t take this personal. I love you nonetheless, but I certainly don’t have to suffer in order to prove my love for you. Besides, if you doubt it, chances are no matter how much I suffer, you will never believe me anyway. Get this: your partner having fun while you are in hardship doesn’t mean they don’t love you. The people who love you don’t owe you any suffering on their part whenever things are not working out for you. So don’t be jealous when your loved one is out with friends while you are working hard or cooking alone at home. No one needs to put their own life on hold only because yours is (even when they truly love you!). Of course, you can ask for support. That’s perfectly reasonable. But asking someone to sacrifice themselves and to suffer so you can feel loved – that is totally unreasonable. And it is a sure relationship killer.

    Relationship killer #2:

    The other way to kill a relationship is by trying to prove your love for someone by sacrificing your own needs and suffering as a consequence. See, whenever you suffer, there is no real love to speak of. If you were doing something for someone because you wanted to and because you loved them unconditionally, you wouldn’t be suffering. But if you sacrifice yourself out of obligation and/or guilt, the unconditional love is gone and you are likely to expect something in return. In other words, you try to manipulate someone into loving you back by doing things for them which they then have to repay you for. Sadly enough, you are playing a game thinking you can control someone else’s feelings and buy their love. Of course, the result is just the opposite – you are slowly but surely killing the relationship. So stop that immediately by starting to put yourself and your needs first. Find your own truth and start honoring it. Understand that you are allowed to have a good time without feeling guilty when your partner does not want to or cannot participate. Of course, you can support them when they are feeling low. But you don’t have to suffer with them or else you will become resentful and kill the relationship as a result.

    In conclusion:

    • Love should be free – no attachments, no suffering, no trading of favors, and no feelings of obligation and guilt.
    • Love should be independent – I love you and I put myself first; you love me and you put yourself first; we love each other and we honor our independent needs nonetheless.
    • Love should be by choice – I love you how I want to, not how I feel have to.

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    Source by Vyara Bridgeman

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  • Love As an Emotion

    Love As an Emotion

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    I am now talking to the male part of any relationship because the male is normally the leader in any relationship. So, men, what will happen if your love for your wife or girlfriend relied on your emotions, or on your feelings? Today, you could cherish her, caress her, care for her, hug and kiss her. Tomorrow, you might feel totally different. You might slap her around a bit, shout and scream at her, ignore her, deride her. Because that is exactly what feelings are all about. Emotions play games on your feelings all the time. And the game changes every day, every minute. Think now of how confusing for the poor lady you have as a girlfriend or wife. She wants your attention, she says she loves you and has chosen you to be her mate, friend, and husband, whatever. But she is afraid of you because you are so much stronger as her, and she knows at any time you could burst into one of your tirades with disastrous consequences for her. Maybe a broken nose, a black eye, cracked ribs. Men who do this to any woman should be ashamed of themselves.

    Real adult love is more than just a feeling. It means caring even when you do not feel like caring. It means spending time with your spouse when you prefer watching an important game on the telly. It also means nursing her when she feels ill and spending time with her when you prefer spending time with your friends. Love is taking responsibility for others and setting their needs and desires above yours. Love is also consistent with your feelings and it does not change every day. Love is not rude or harsh with your spouse, and respects her as the weaker member of your relationship.

    I guess what I really want to say about being in a relationship where emotions and feelings is the basis of your relationship, and then you need to think long and hard about this. To rely on feelings is immature and stupidity, you just cannot rely on it. Do you really want to have a relationship with this woman? Tomorrow you might prefer spending time with your friends. Or for that matter, some other woman. So, if you decide no, I do not want to spend so much time with this woman, and then tell her that so that she could understand where she stands. She might feel hurt now, but in the end, she will at least know where she stands with you. And both of you could move on with your lives.

    There are so many examples I can give on real love. But one thing I will say about this. Real love is taking responsibility of the opposite gender. Today you say you love her, but she will have the assurance that regardless of how you feel, tomorrow you would love just as much. Do not rely on your feelings of love for today, tomorrow it might be different.

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    Source by Rodney Evan Bentley

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  • The Year Our Marriage Grew

    The Year Our Marriage Grew

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    AT around our tenth wedding anniversary, we had a realisation.

    The realisation we had was this: despite all the quality marriage counselling we had received from our wonderfully gifted and skilled marriage counsellor early on, we were, at that time, still not enjoying satisfaction.

    We now knew the principles, but now we had to apply them. Knowledge of principles provides no satisfaction, only application provides satisfaction.

    The year our marriage grew coincided with application. Instead of believing in concepts and talking about them, we decided to commit to working the concepts out in our marriage. This inevitably meant adapting the marital wisdom we had learned so it worked for our unique coupling, for our inimitable family structure.

    We had had twenty counselling sessions, and I think our counsellor was at pains to say, ‘Go and do what we’ve been talking about; what I’ve been showing you’… initially it even got worse. It had nothing to do with the standard of our counsel – it was like growing pains in our marriage. Things tend to get worse before they get better.

    Inevitably, we as partners had to learn to commit to each other in ways we had never thought we would need to. Our covenant to each other was solid, but we now had to commit to love this other person in ways that worked for them, not simply ourselves. Without even recognising it at the time, we began to accept each other like we had never done before. That is true love: unconditional acceptance at the deepest level. And it takes time.

    The year our marriage grew was Year 4. Indeed, the previous three simply proved our commitment to each other. We hadn’t torn each other apart. But there were some horrible experiences. Whilst those first three years were unbelievably tough, they set us up as we pressed on into the hard work required in finding our way into the space of marital peace (which is punctuated with conflict that is managed well in the main).

    My wife and I are believers in marriage; that marriage is not only wonderful but hard work. We believe, as we experienced, that counselling works; but not only that, there’s a limit to what counselling can do. I say that as someone who gives marital counsel.

    It must be applied. There needs to be a time where a couple weighs anchor and begins the work of reconciling the problems on the high seas of their marriage. It can take years, but don’t be despondent. You learn to survive when it’s just you and your spouse. Sure, we all need tune-ups, prayer and support, but others’ help is limited.

    This is what we learned: marriage seems best when the foibles of one are acceptable to the other. What seems like an easy concept can demand years of work to arrive at.

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    Source by Steve Wickham

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  • Love One Another (A Sermon on John 13: 31-35)

    Love One Another (A Sermon on John 13: 31-35)

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    We are in the 13th chapter of the Gospel according to St John's this week, and I'm going to unpack our reading verse by verse as it is a difficult passage.

    "When he had gone out, Jesus said," Now the Son of Man has been glorified, and God has been glorified in him. " (John 13:31)

    The person who had 'gone out' was Judas, and the sentence seems to suggest that Judas' leaving somewhat brought glory to Jesus, which sounds really odd.

    "If God has been glorified in him, God will also glorify him in himself and will glorify him at once." (John 13:32)

    I really have no idea where to begin with that statement!

    "Little children, I am with you only a little longer. You will look for me; and as I said to the Jews so now I say to you, 'Where I am going, you cannot come.'" (John 13:33 )

    That statement makes sense to us as Jesus speaking about his own impending suffering and death, though at the time it made no sense at all to His disciples.

    I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another. "(John 13: 34-45)

    That concluding pronouncement, I suspect, is the most difficult to understand of all!

    "All you need is love!" – so said the Beatles.

    When I read statements like these from the lips of Jesus, I can almost hear the soundtrack of that well-known Beatles song playing in the background.

    "Love is all you need. Love is all you need …"

    It's not true, of course. Love isn't all we need – not in relationships, not in families, not in governments.

    We had an election yesterday. Did you vote for the most loving candidate? Should you have?

    I tried to give some thought after reading this passage as to who the most loving candidate for electoral office was. It wasn't obvious.

    It didn't take me long to come up with the names of politicians who were definitely NOT full of love and sweetness, but it seemed less obvious to me which candidates actually were.

    Did the candidate who loves us the most win? Do we care?

    In truth, in as much as we might say, "all we need is love" , I don't think we really care whether our political leaders love us, any more than we really care whether our boss at work truly loves us. Love is not all we need. A good capacity for management is probably far more important in cases like this than is love!

    Love is not all we need in government or in families, and it's not even all we need in a system of morality! This might sound counterintuitive. Is not all of morality – all our statements about what is right and what is wrong – really an extension of that basic ideal of love?

    Certainly, over the generations, scores of philosophers and other great thinkers have suggested that all of our moral intuitions can be reduced to one simple exhortation – if not 'to love' exactly, to something very akin to that.

    The British philosopher, John Stuart Mill, saw all of morality as a system of increasing pleasure for people and reducing harm. He is probably best remembered for his 'harm principle' :

    "That the only purpose for which power can be rightfully exercised over any member of a civilized community, against his will, is to prevent harm to others."

    I have a feeling that if you'd asked Mill what the essence of morality was, he might not have said 'love one another' , but might well have said 'don't' harm one another ' , which is pretty similar.

    Likewise, the great 18th century German philosopher, Immanuel Kant, believed that morality could be reduced to a single maxim – the 'categorical imperative' :

    "Act only according to that maxim whereby you can, at the same time, will that it should become a universal law."

    That's always sounded to me like a really complex way of saying 'love your neighbor as you would love yourself " , which, of course, was Jesus' 'golden rule' that many people see as being His one-line summary of the moral law , along with the first and great commandment, of course, that you have to love God:

    "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets. " (Matthew 22: 37-40)

    We are familiar with these commandments. We hear them every week in church, and they do seem to suggest that everything in the law of God comes down to love, and that the rest is just commentary.

    Is that really what Jesus was saying? St Augustine thought so, and in my previous sermons on these passages, I have suggested exactly that – that there is really only one law of God – that we love – and that the rest is just application. My more recent reading though has suggested that it's actually a lot more complicated than that, at least if Jesus really was being true to His Hebraic tradition.

    The Hebraic law centers around the Ten Commandments – the ten words of God to the people of Israel – and while it seems straightforward to see commandments like "thou shalt not steal" and "thou shalt not murder" as being extensions of the commandment to love , other commandments like "honor thy father and thy mother" do not seem to be so easily reducible. Honoring your father and your mother seems to be more about respecting authority than it is about love .

    I've been reading a very interesting book lately by moral psychologist, Jonathan Haidt, called "the Righteous Mind" , in which he outlines what he calls 'moral foundation theory' .

    I'm not suggesting that everyone should rush out to get a copy of this book. It is not an easy read and could prove difficult if you don't have an academic background in the study of philosophical ethics (which, thankfully, I do).

    The author's key point, at any rate, is that our moral intuitions can't be reduced to any one simple maxim such as 'love one another' as morality is invariably more complex than that.

    Haidt suggests that there are five reasonably independent dimensions to our moral awareness, and 'caring' for others is just one of those dimensions. The others are:

    • Fairness (which is all about justice, rewards and punishments)
    • Loyalty (which is associated with values ​​such as faithfulness and patriotism )
    • Authority (where you honor your father and your mother, king and country)
    • Sanctity (which involves respecting your body and potentially embracing things like chastity, temperance and cleanliness)

    Forgive me if I'm now sounding more dry and esoteric than the book I mentioned. My point is actually a simple one – that 'all you need is love' is both simplistic and inadequate. We don't only need love – not if we are going to be successful in our relationships or in all of life. We actually need a lot of things – courage, self-discipline, wisdom, nurture and support and a good education, and more!

    Of course, Jesus didn't say "love is all you need". That was ' The Beatles' . What Jesus did say was "By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another" . In other words, Jesus didn't say that love is all we need to live a full and productive life. What He said was that it was all we needed in order to show the world that we are His disciples. That might sound like much the same thing but it's actually quite distinct.

    The life of love is not a strategy for success, despite what any number of tele-evangelists might have told you. Indeed, if it's right to consider it a strategy at all, the life of love could only be a strategy for getting yourself killed. That's certainly how it worked for Jesus.

    I'm sure I've mentioned before that friend who said to me "I'm sick of hearing people tell me about all the problems they had before they met Jesus and how He solved them all for them. till I met Jesus! "

    That's difficult to hear, I think. We don't want to think of Jesus as the one who leads us down a path of suffering and misery. We want to think of Jesus as one who elevates us to heavenly places.

    Isn't that what religion is for after all? Isn't good religion supposed to benefit our lives and help us live more fully and peacefully with a great sense of purpose and fulfillment? Surely, it's not just about suffering in this world so that we can enjoy a better life in the next? Surely there's more to it than that?

    I don't think Jesus is saying that discipleship is all about suffering any more than it is all about success. Discipleship, Jesus says, is all about love, and everything else depends on what Jesus means by love .

    Jesus says His command to love is a new commandment, and that's a surprise. Certainly, the commandment to love is as old as the Scriptures themselves, so it must be the latter part of the commandment – to love one another ' as I have loved you' – that makes it new.

    When we hear those words, I suspect most of us immediately think of the cross and Jesus laying down his life for us. That makes sense, and indeed the same Gospel writer, John, writes in his first letter "This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us" (1 John 3:16). Even so, without wanting to press the issue of the timeline too heavily, the exhortation we have in today's Gospel reading -to love one another "as I have loved you" happens before the cross, suggesting that the model on view here may not be the death of Jesus but the life of Jesus!

    Further, as noted, today's reading begins with a reference to Judas – "when he had gone out" – and Jesus' exhortation to love each other as He has loved us comes immediately before the two terrible betrayals from disciples whom Jesus had just broken bread with and whose feet Jesus had just washed – the one betrayal being from Judas, of course, and the other one being from dear Peter!

    Jesus loved Peter, was betrayed by Peter, and would eventually be reconciled with Peter. Jesus loved Judas but would never be reconciled with him. Even perfect love does not guarantee a perfect ending to the story. Even so, love anyway – that's the new commandment .

    Yes, "greater love has no one than this – to lay down one's life for their friends" (John 15: 3). That is true, and bodily self-sacrifice is indeed the ultimate example of love, but most of the time love is not so grandiose and (thankfully) not quite so painful. The far more common (and in some ways more difficult) labor of love is the ongoing work of having to forgive those who fail us, and sometimes fail us very badly.

    This, I believe, is the love by which everyone will now that we are His disciples – it's the love that breaks bread with those who betray us and that washes the feet of those who turn their backs on us. It's the love that finds its ultimate inspiration in the sacrificial death of Christ on the cross, but which likewise finds daily encouragement in the simple acts of grace shown by Jesus towards those whom He knew would radically fail Him.

    I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another. "(John 13: 34-45)

    It's not a strategy for success. It's not a means to a better life or more successful relationships. It's just the way that we demonstrate to the world that we are followers of Jesus. We break bread, we wash feet, we empathise, we forgive. We love one another just as He loved us.

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    Source by David B. Smith

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  • Sex Tips: Temperature Play Methods

    Sex Tips: Temperature Play Methods

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    Looking for sex tips to spice things up? There are many ways to do so, but one that many couples are unfamiliar with is incorporating hot and cold play in the bedroom. Altering the temperature can awaken the nerve endings and circulatory system in ways that deliver mind-blowing pleasure to both partners. The following examples, along with safety tips for maintaining vaginal and penis health, can help couples get their bearings in this exciting new world of sensation play.

    Cup of Water

    Keeping a cup of warm (not hot!) water near the bed can boost his oral sex enjoyment. A partner can take a sip, swallow, then take another sip and hold the warm water in his/her mouth, then take the man’s penis inside. Swashing the water around his penis for a few moments then swallowing it will give him a tantalizing experience.

    Breath Play

    Warm, moist breath is one of the body’s most pleasurable heat sources, and making use of this natural heat during foreplay and sex can bring both partners thrilling waves of enjoyment. Gently exhale on a lover’s sensitive spots, including the stomach, neck and ears. Gently breathing on the clitoris and testicles is also encouraged.

    Candle Wax

    Most people have heard of dripping hot candle wax on the skin as part of sex play, and many find this frightening. For good reason – most people don’t want to actually burn their skin. The trick to safely participating in wax play is to use candles made of soy, which don’t require as much heat to melt as those made of beeswax or regular wax, so they are less likely to deliver too much heat. Also, of course, if one has very sensitive skin concerning heat, this method should be avoided.

    Chilled Spoon

    Chill a metal spoon for a bit in a bowl of ice or cold water, then apply the back of the spoon to a lover’s neck, nipples, stomach, etc.

    Plain Old Ice

    An ice cube in the hand can go a long way. Trace a line extending from one side of a lover’s neck all the way down the side of the leg, them up the inside of the leg, down the inside of the other and back up the other side of his or her body. It’s best to avoid the penis and testicles.

    Ice Dildo/Hot Towel

    This is one of the more hardcore forms of temperature play, which should be pursued with caution. The idea is for the man to masturbate with a warm, wet towel around his member while a woman masturbates with a chilled dildo. Then, he enters her, and the sensation change for both is out of this world.

    There are several options for a chilled dildo. Some glass and metal dildos are made to be chilled, but caution should be taken. Glass that gets very cold and then undergoes a sudden temperature change, such as inside the body, can break – yikes! And cold metal may stick to a lady’s warm, wet inside – also no good. Use proper precautions. Let the glass or metal warm just a little; use lube; use condoms; always, always follow packaging instructions.

    Blindfold

    Any of the above techniques can be combined with one another, and all of them may be more enjoyable with a blindfold in place. This will leave a lover anticipating, eager and unaware of what sensation is to come. Sight deprivation may be most exciting when lovers are combining a form of heat play like candle wax with a form of cold play, like ice cubes or a cold spoon.

    Keeping it Safe

    Always check in to be sure that the skin is not being burned or losing sensation due to excessive cold or heat. Don’t freeze or heat toys that were not designed to withstand such temperatures. Ease into temperature play to get to know what one’s skin can tolerate.

    Maintaining skin health on the sexual organs can’t be overrated; one’s ability to sense pleasure depends on it. Men can take an extra step in the penis care department by using a quality penis health creme (health professionals recommend Man1 Man Oil) daily. Shea butter and vitamin E keep the skin moisturized, protecting it from the frictions of a vigorous sex life. Show one’s sex life some excitement with temperature play, and one’s manhood some love with a penis health crème.

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    Source by John Dugan

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  • Wisdom For Living

    Wisdom For Living

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    Do you have wisdom? Wisdom is the key to successful living on earth. Lack of it is to be groping in the dark and be surrounded by great woes, wailing and destruction. Wisdom makes the difference between success and failure, life and death, poverty and prosperity, health and sickness. Possession of wisdom is to possess life.

    “I, wisdom, dwell with prudence, and find out knowledge and discretion… I love those who love me, and those who seek me diligently will find me. Riches and honor are with me, enduring riches and righteousness… The Lord possessed me at the beginning of His way, before His works of old… Then I was beside Him as a master craftsman; and I was daily His delight, rejoicing always before Him… – Proverbs 8:12, 17-18, 22, 30 (NKJV).

    The Lord founded the earth by wisdom (Proverbs 3:19) and so man needs wisdom to be able to occupy her successfully. Wisdom is the principal thing to possess in order to enjoy living on earth. Every challenge in life is basically a wisdom problem and to have wisdom for any challenge is to have 50% of it solved.

    Wisdom was God’s master craftsman in creation. He utilized wisdom to successfully create all we see, use and enjoy. With wisdom you have prudence, knowledge and discretion; a complete package that will help you not to stumble or make mistakes in your words and action.

    The choices you make are measures of the wisdom available to you. The more the wisdom you acquire the better your choices and the outcomes you get. It is your responsibility to go for wisdom in all areas of your life. You need wisdom to live a victorious Christian life and also to live every phase of your life very well and remarkably: as a child, student, worker, spouse, parent, friend, leader, neighbour, colleague, group member, boss, employee and client. The list can go on and on. Your level of wisdom will affect your relationship with others and so is important that you possess it.

    Your tomorrow is a product of your application of wisdom today. The wisdom seeds you plant today grow and add up to give you a glorious future. The wisdom steps you take today will take you to your ultimate peak tomorrow. The prize you pay today to get wisdom cannot be compared to the returns that will come to you in future. The outcome of wisdom is worth all you have to put in or sacrifice to get it. The success of your life depends on it, so go for the wisdom for living.

    The word of God (The bible), which is the bag of wisdom seeds, has all the wisdom you need to live a triumphant life on this earth. Search the word for them, for whoever finds wisdom finds life and obtains favour from God.

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    Source by Ngozi Nwoke

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  • 7 Qualities of a Good Wife – Part I

    7 Qualities of a Good Wife – Part I

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    Whether you’re a man looking for a good wife or a wife wanting to improve yourself, your marriage or your relationship – take a look at these 7 qualities of a good wife. Good fruit will come from these basic qualities anyone can develop.

    7) Nag free. Ladies, a good wife is going to be nag free. Nagging is an ineffective method of trying to get your husband to perform a task you desire. Trust me ladies – it doesn’t work and often will have the opposite of its intended affect.

    6) Supportive. Are you supportive? What does it mean to be supportive? Do you belittle your man or do you help him to feel good about himself, his job, activities? Your husband will be much more respectful of you if you support him. Even when you don’t agree with him – respectfully let him know you don’t agree – then support him anyway. Otherwise, if he has difficulties – he’ll feel as though you’re adding to his troubles.

    5) Build up your man. Ladies, there’s no quicker way to build resentment in your man than to criticize him – especially in front of others. On the flip side – try genuinely complementing your husband in front of other people. Your husband will glow with admiration toward you and you’ll feel his appreciation as love.

    4) Keep him happy in the bedroom. Unfortunately, many women underestimate the importance of keeping her man’s needs met. Often this comes from the basic differences in women and men. For men, sexual desire is much like physical hunger and if it’s not fed properly – the relationship will struggle. Women must look to understand the needs of the man from his perspective not hers.

    3) Respect. A good wife will try to treat her man with respect. How? Much of learning how to be respectful toward your husband has to do with the way you talk to him. The old phrase “It’s not so much what you say but how you say it” should become a wife’s motto. This doesn’t mean you need to be careful what you say to your husband – just be respectful in the way you say it.

    2) Communicate. Ironically, good communication between men and women can be quite frustrating. However, a good wife will seek to discover what’s on her mind and find a way to express herself to her husband. Often, men and women will make a joint decision – while the man thinks she’s in agreement with him – but only to discover later that she thought the decision was a bad idea.

    1) Be pleasant. Work to be pleasant toward your husband. Don’t be one of those people who makes everyone around you feel bad just because you’ve had a hard day. Good things will come from being pleasant. It’s a decision – just decide to be pleasant. But if you can’t be pleasant – make a decision not to bring him down with you.

    Marriage & Love Blog

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    Source by Edward Welch

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  • Teen Relationships

    Teen Relationships

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    Before I start to talk about teen relationships I feel I have to make a clarification. Many people when they think of the word relationship, automatically equate it to love or sexual relationship. According to the general definition of relationship this is any connection between two or more elements and these elements can be anything from chemical substances to human beings. So from this definition it is simple to deduct the meaning of this word applied to human beings. A teen relationship can be any kind of relationship

    1. between teens of the same gender
    2. between teens of the opposite gender, like boyfriend girlfriend relationships
    3. between teens and other persons of the same or different gender and different age.

    The quality of these relationships can also vary, but there are two kinds of teenager relationships I’m going to talk about here;

    • teen friendships and
    • teen love relationships

    Teen Friendships

    This kind of teenager relationship will fit into all three categories above. It can exist between a teenager and other persons of same or different gender and age. A good friend – no matter age or gender – is one of the best things you can have on this earth. A really good friend that is special to you and means much to you. A person that is always there for you.

    Many successful love relationships has started with friendship and this is probably the reason for it’s success. The better you know the other person, the better you’ll go along with him or her and in a long lasting love relationship – as man and woman – your appreciation of your partner as a friend will mean much more than anything else. If we look at it from the other end, it seems much more difficult to build a friendship from a love or sexual relationship. In fact, I have not heard about it, maybe you have but the point is that a good friendship is always good to have both as a basis of a future love relationship and as a friendship by itself.

    A teenage friendship can exist between anyone no matter what gender, age, race, background or whatever. A 13 year old girl and a 50 year old man can have a great and even lifelong friendship together as well as two teenagers of the same gender.

    Teen love relationships

    While you can talk quite frankly and straight forward in a friendship most of us are more aware of not hurting the partner in a love relationship. This can evolve to a degree of lies and even no communication at all just to protect your partner.

    There are also more mutual expectations in a love relationship and more intimate emotions are involved than in a good friendship. A teen love relationship can be great and long lasting but if there is no basis of friendship in it the probability of sustaining it is significantly lower. There are some legally defined limitations with regards to who can go into a teen love or sexual relationship. It is illegal for people of 18 years and above to have a sexual relation to a minor but It is definitely not illegal to have older friends.

    A good friendship is one of the best gifts God has provided our lives with and even if you marry the sweetest boy or girl in the world, neither of you will be happy if you aren’t good friends.

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    Source by Terje Ellingsen

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  • Shop Smart & Save Money 2019

    Shop Smart & Save Money 2019

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    In this eCommerce era, it has become possible to find the best deals using a smartphone or a laptop, and get it shipped to your doorstep. It also became possible to score deals in stores, online and through apps.

    There are 3 ways to shop smart and save money in 2019, before buying, while buying and after purchase.

    1-How to save money before buying an item?

    When I find a product I want or need, the first step is to decide whether to purchase it online or in store. Then what store or online platform offers the best quality to price ratio. I also look at some elements that I believe to be very important before making any purchase:

    -Shipping Policy: It’s important to know if a price tag online comes with free shipping or if the customer is responsible for this cost.

    -Return Policy: It’s also important to find out if a seller or a shopping platform offers free returns or not. With a free return policy in place, the seller will pay for the return shipping cost if the customer doesn’t like the item received.

    -Location: Where is the item you are purchasing being shipped from? The items origin location will determine how long it should take for your item to arrive. However there are a lot of online sellers that use the drop shipping method. When the consumer purchases, the seller (who doesn’t have the item on hand) then has the manufacturer or a 3rd party entity ship the item to the customer. These items are usually being shipped from overseas from countries like China, which will take a lot longer for the for the item to arrive. If you are OK waiting that long for shipping it makes no sense to go through a drop shipper, you could pay less by going directly to Alibabba or ALiexpress websites.

    Following are some ways I use to score some good deals

    Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links to products. We may receive a commission for purchases made through these links.

    Shop & Save Money

    -Goodwill Outlet Store

    Goodwill Outlet is a good example of a store that I never visited before 2018. Now I can go there and buy as many items as I want for very cheap, and if I’m lucky enough that day, I can find some brand name items, to keep or resell online. I can pay up to $1.49 for a pound of clothes (prices vary depending upon location). The Goodwill outlet in my opinion is not only for someone who resells online. I encourage you to visit the Goodwill outlet store in your area, it’s an experience that you will enjoy if you like finding deals, and it’s for a good cause. If you decide to go after reading this article or if you have been there, please share with us your experience in the comments area for everyone to learn from

    -eBay Auctions

    eBay is another platform where you are most likely to score a deal. It’s in my list of smart ways to shop online in 2019 for 3 reasons:

    1. Huge inventory with a possibility to make an offer, which gives you some control over the price to are willing to pay for an item. If the seller accepts you have a deal.

    2. HUGE number of auctions you can win for cheap if you know what you are doing. I usually score a great deal quickly by bidding on auctions that are ending soon with no bidders. I found out that winning auctions is a great way to save money and shop smart.

    3. Rare finds in all categories

    eBay has been around for a while and has a strong brand that offers a good buyer protection policy and has trust from around the world.The eBay platform is another smart way to shop, and also get rid of unwanted items around the house. I sell on eBay and keep a Top Rated seller status with a 100% customer feedback, just by keeping my prices low, accepting reasonable offers, and trying to give the best customer service possible. You can still get a good feedback even if the item isn’t brand new, as long as you are honest and mention any scratches or blemishes in the description. You can find my store on eBay here. I will appreciate it if you check it out.

    -Poshmark

    I love the poshmark app because It’s easy to use, and it’s a great way to find some good deals in the clothing category. As a posher, you can make offers on items you like and use the power of negotiation to your advantage to ask poshers to lower their prices. You can also follow the sellers you like and join parties based on brands or item categories you’re interested in.The Poshmark App made it to my list of smart ways to shop in 2019 because it allows it’s members to be buyers and sellers at the same time. It’s a great way to clean up your closet and get rid of the clothes you don’t use anymore.If you don’t have a Poshmark account, you can receive a free $5 bonus when you sign up with my code SARADRETAIL.

    Disclaimer: If you use my code to sign up to poshmark for free, you will receive a $5 credit and I will receive a $5 credit after you make your first purchase. Please leave me a comment below to follow your closet, you can check out my closet here.

    -ThredUP:

    ThredUP is another website that makes buying brand name preowned clothing and accessories affordable.Their customer service is great, their shipping is quick, and their prices are some of the best in the market. Every purchase I make in the thredUP website is a deal. Check it out here if you are looking for some high ticket items for a really good price. Some of the brands available on thredUP: GUCCI, BURBERRY, GIORGIO ARMANI, MAX MARA, J.CREW, THEORY, COACH, VINCE, MICHAEL KORS…

    2-HOW TO SAVE MONEY WHILE BUYING AN ITEM?

    There are a couple of different ways to save money while buying products. When you are buying online, depending upon your platform (ie. eBay, amazon, poshmark, craigslist, letgo, offerup, etc.) you may have the power of negotiating your price. Haggling over price is still used in many cultures all over the world, but ultimatley as a buyer we haggle to get the best price we can. Many platforms now have a way to haggle through “Best offer” or “Make an Offer” options. Of course the seller ultimately gets to decide to accept, counter or decline the offer. As long as you offer a reasonable price and don’t low ball in most cases you can expect to pay a lower price than originally was being asked.

    Another way to save money online is through coupons, ecoupons, and promo codes. You may be thinking did I just read coupons, aren’t those the things my mom cuts out of the Sunday paper. Well they aren’t just for in store purchases any more. Everything is online now-a-days and that includes discount coupons. There are websites that offer online discounts and printable coupons for almost any item, any store and any retailer at the click of button. These discount codes can be entered at checkout to get anywhere from 10-70% off your total purchase. Plus on many platforms if you bundle (purchase more than 1 item from the same seller) your purchase you can save even more.

    Coupons have been used at grocery retailers for over a hundred years. With technology retailers are now able to offer their customers direct mail and email coupons, they can put coupons on their website and customers can even save them on their phone. There are coupons available for any item, any discount and any retailer. Its just a matter of finding the best coupon to use for your purchase.

    Here you can check out Coupons.com for some good deals.

    Shop Smart In 2019

    3-How to Save money after purchase?

    3-How to Save money after purchase?

    You may be wondering what I mean by saving money after you have made a purchase. It doesn’t make sense that you can save money after you have already purchased an item. Well in actuality I mean cash back rewards. Cash back rewards allow you to earn cash back on any item you have purchased, in turn allowing you to save off the purchase of that product.

    We are in the age of apps. We have become glued to our phones, never letting them out of our site, using them to not only make phone calls but browse the internet, purchase products, watch tv, read a book, etc. Apps have become a normal part of our phones anatomy. And there are some apps which allow you to make cash back by doing your normal everyday shopping. These apps include Ibotta, Shopkick, Receipt Hog, FetchRewards, etc. The basic premise of these apps is once you make a purchase you upload your receipt and based upon the items purchased and total spent, you will receive a point value. The points equal a dollar amount and once you reach a certain points total you get that dollar amount either through paypal or through gift cards, etc. Each app has its own unique additions such as getting points just to walk into a store, or scanning certain products. Its nice to know that you can get rewarded for doing normal everyday things such as shopping.

    These are the apps I use. If you sign up under me you will get starting bonus:

    Ibotta: gyrrrvo

    Shopkick: SAVE219356 – get 250 kicks for signing up

    Fetch Rewards: YF8AD – get 3000 points for signing up

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    Source by Sarah Labdar

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  • Your Personal Healing Journey

    Your Personal Healing Journey

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    As you journey precious New Year Healing Moments are within your grasp.
    Can you believe another year has come and gone? After the busy Christmas and new year celebrations are over is a great time for personal contemplation and resolve. You have most probably, already indulged in retrospection and re-evaluating some of your life choices.

    Are you looking forward to beginning a year of opportunities and ground-breaking possibilities? Can you see today as if it were a new-born? Will you choose to dress your new born year, with zest and enthusiasm?

    "To every season there is season, and a time to every purpose under heaven: A time to be born, …" ~ Ecclesiastes

    Each bright day is given to you and I to live with renewed vigor – to daily grow and try to be your best and highest self. Don't wait to respond to your thoughts and impulses.
    May this year be full of love, laughter, happiness and good health!
    Can you react to your longings and dreams? Can this day, this year, be filled with precious moments? Don't wait!

    If you are looking for effective ways of changing your life for the better, then you'll be sure to find useful information in the following Fifteen Precious Moment Ideas:

    1.Get In Shape:

    It's easy enough to start an exercise and diet program, but the trick is to find one that will give you results and that you will stick to over the long run.
    2. Eat Healthier Food and Less Overall:

    With dedicated determination (Even though you are surrounded by cheap junk food) you can slowly develop healthier eating habits.

    3. Become More Active:

    You may or may not have a big weight problem. Nonetheless, you need is to find ways of moving around more throughout the day instead of simply setting around or staying hunched over the computer or in a soft chair using your mobile phone.

    4. Quit Procrastinating:

    The biggest barrier that keeps most people from reaching their goals is relaxing and doing fun things and not work on their goal. Once you get used to procrastinating it's difficult to snap yourself out of it and change your bad habits.

    5. Improve Your Concentration:

    Finding ways to focus and stay focused is a constant challenge. It isn't easy and requires a daily effort to the task you have assigned yourself. This is one of those – if it is to be it is up to you.

    6. Be Sociable And Outgoing:

    Don't get stuck in a rut of staying at home most of the time. Or if your condition doesn't allow you mobility seek the companionship and sociability of others. Meeting with old friends or new people can be beneficial to your mental well-being.

    7. Reduce Stress:

    Stress is one of the biggest people killers causing strokes, heart attacks and death. It can have very destructive on your health. Some stress may be an unavoidable side effect of our hectic modern lifestyles. However, it can be effectively managed. Seek all sources for effective stress control and then introduce effective stress management into your daily action plan.

    8. Learn To Be Happier With Your Life:

    Attitude is such a powerful empowerment. Is your glass usually full or are you regularly on a petty party? You can control your happiness. It takes time and patience to learn how to find joy in the little things and not to let problems bring you down. Try counting your blessings naming them one by one.

    9. Spend More Time With People That Matter:

    One of the most difficult challenge you may face is to disavow your association with the wrong people. There is just too little time in this life for us to waste it on insincere, duplicitous and toxic people. You should focus on the people who care about you deeply, as this is the best way to stay happy.

    11. Reinvent Yourself:

    In Life it is often essential to re-boot your life. If you don't feel quite happy no matter what you do, it is perhaps time to make some serious changes in your life. Reinventing yourself can give you a whole new perspective on life and take you in directions you may never have dreamed were possible.

    12. Learn How To Be More Self-reliant:

    Technology, government programs and handouts offering cheap ready-to-eat food and all manner of useful tools have made us somewhat spoiled. We often get well into adulthood without having what it takes to be independent. You can learn from the disabled a great lesson on how to fend for yourself. Do what you can without the assistance from others and you will learn to enjoy self-sufficient and self-reliant.

    13. Face your fears And insecurities:

    You will find this particular point masked beneath other resolutions, but fear and insecurity are often the cause of several problems that we want to address. You need to think of it as surviving and controlling your fear rather than overcoming it, and it will enable you to shed off a lot of the insecurities that you have.

    14. Stick To Healthy Unique Personal Habits Developed:

    The most important point to mention is that all the positive changes you make have to be permanent. Work on sticking with the good habits you have adopted, until they are a natural part of who you are. There is no other way to achieve true self-improvement.
    Well, there you have it – a key list of precious moment advice, tips and tricks to help you see your New Year's resolution through and make some long-term changes in your life.

    Please accept my hope for happiness and healing for the beginning of your new year … (And as a grieving person I hope your year begins as you desire to understand and move through your grief).

    It is my prayer for you, each day this year, will be filled with a deep sense of belonging whether or not you have the blessing of being with all those you love.

    15. May You Be Granted Serenity And Wisdom:

    "God grant me the serenity; To accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference."
    ~ Reinhold Niebuhr (Serenity Prayer)

    It is my sincere wish your life will be filled with fulfillment, meaning, and connection to what matters most. Most of all, may your connection to the source of all things be strong and clear so that you can be an embodiment of happiness and healing. May you experience many precious healing moments this year.

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    Source by Duane Marchant

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