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Tag: Lead

  • The Best Final Expense Sales Presentation Ever

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    Arriving At The Prospects Home

    When I arrive at the house, I like to park in the driveway because that is where family parks and they are more likely to greet me. I look for the door that they use the most and I go and knock on their door (usually the back or side door). While waiting for them to come to door, I look down at my clipboard and pretend to read. I try not to make any eye contact until they open the door.

    When they open the door, I greet them as if they have been waiting for me all day long. “Mrs. Jones? My name is Joseph and the reason I’m stopping by today is because you recently sent this card in and it’s my job to bring you that information you requested. I’d really like to go over this with you, can I come in?”

    If they say yes, GREAT!!! I’m in! If they say it’s not a good time, then I will schedule an appointment with them for the next day. Now you are off to your next one. Some people will let you in and some people will make appointments with you, some won’t be home. (Always make sure you go back or call if they’re not there.) Of course, some will slam the door in your face… ha (fortunately, not usually.)

    At the end of the day, you should have made 3-4 presentations and scheduled 4-5 appointments. The point is, you are out there working and making money. I’ve honestly made $8000 in commission in one day!!! No joke.

    Making Appointments

    Rather then drive around all day, some people prefer to make appointments or hire someone to make appointments for them. Personally, I hired someone to do this for me. I schedule my appointments an hour and half apart. Usually it starts at 10:30am and ends at 7:30pm. I try to get 7 appointments a day, 4 days a week. I always make my appointments the day before because they forget if it’s more than one day away.

    Script for Setting Appointments Yourself

    Here is an appointment script you can use:

    Good Afternoon ____________, This is ____________

    I have in my hand, a pink card that you filled out and sent in requesting information on the Social Security Death Benefit Program.

    Now, my job is to get this information out to you.

    The address I have here is ___________________.

    Is that correct?

    Okay… Great!

    On the card ________, you wrote down that you were 65 and that your wife was 63… is that correct?

    Awesome, awesome…

    Let me ask you a question: are you (you guys) working, retired or receiving disability?

    Oh yeah, that’s good, that’s good… What time… do you/she/he get off work…

    chit chat…

    anyway, like I said, my job is to this information out to you and I can either get it out to you tomorrow at ______ or ______…

    which is best for you?

    Great…

    Do you have a pen and paper handy or do you have your calendar in front of you?

    I just want you to write down my first name… It’s Joseph. Last name Haworth, H-A….

    Now put down there ______am/pm on ___________day… that’s tomorrow.

    Well, I really appreciate your time, I look forward to meeting you and __________, at ______________am/pm _____day________.

    Have a great day.

    When you arrive at your appointment, smile BIG and assume you are getting in. Say you are there for the appointment and ask to come in. It’s easy to get in… most of them remember that you are coming.

    Presentation

    To put you at ease, I want you to know that I’m not a sales person at all. I’m the most passive, non pushy person you can imagine. There really is no trick to it. So relax your shoulders and have fun.

    Once you are in the door, you compliment their home, their yard, their dog, the smell of the house… you know… whatever! Just compliment. My favorite one is to mention how clean the house is. If it is really clean, it means they work really hard at it and they appreciate someone noticing. As I’m walking in the house, I look at the pictures and I either ask who is in the pictures before I sit down or I ask later. In any case, seniors love to share their pictures so make sure you ask about them.

    I’m always very casual and I do my best to avoid the sales presentation for about a half hour. I like to have them talk to me and tell me about themselves and their family and their problems etc. I honestly get sucked in. I’m right there, feeling their joy and pain and I’m concerned and interested. I don’t care about the insurance at that point. Eventually, you move to the presentation and by this time you are friends and this helps them listen and helps you know how to communicate to them. Here are the steps:

    1. You tell them why they received the card and what it’s about.

    2. You bring up the cost of a burial and the fact their family is going to have to pay $10,000.

    3. You find out why they sent the card in.

    4. Ask who their beneficiary is and if they have ever paid for a funeral (both these questions bring out emotion because they don’t want their kids to pay for the funeral and by asking if they have ever paid for one, this helps them remember the pain of paying all that money for a funeral.)

    5. Ask them what medications they take and what they are for. Then you ask how their overall health is. “Have you had any heart problems, or kidney, or liver or lung problems? If so, when?” You need to know when because most applications only care about the past 2 years or so.

    6. Now you know what they are going to be approved for and you can show them some prices. I usually write down 3 or 4 prices on the back of their lead card. I try to match what I think they can afford. Once I write them down, I go over the prices and then hand them the sheet. I say, “Now, Mrs. Jones, I want you to look over these three prices and you tell me which one is best for you?

    7. Before I give them the prices, I tell them about an immediate benefit and a graded benefit. The immediate benefit means that their family will get the full face amount if they died even after only one payment. The graded policy, however, makes them wait two years before they have full coverage. To find out which one they qualify for, I have to ask the questions on the application. (However, if you asked enough questions earlier, you already know….)

    8. Before I ask the immediate benefit questions, I ask them to pick out a price first. (This is called asking for the sale. You have to ask for the sale or you will not sell!!! Plain and simple). Knowing the price they will pay helps with the next step. When you know they qualify for immediate benefits, after you ask the appropriate questions (that you already know the answers to), you stand up and congratulate them.

    9. At that point, all you have to do is ask for their personal information. “Mrs. Jones, can I see your SSN and Drivers License”… the point is that you start writing the application.

    We hope you will join us to see the full presentation in print, audio and on video.

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    Source by Jody Haworth

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  • Why You Need to Express Emotion

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    When I was young I was taught that crying was not good. After all, the message was that if you cry too much, “you’re going to get sick.” Crying, especially in public, definitely was bad news. In short, crying, even when grieving, was considered to be a sign of weakness. If you were going to cry, then do so in private.

    Through the years this and many other natural ways of showing emotion have been stifled by many of the celebrities who always assume a stoic pose when appearing on camera. (I always remember the death of President Kennedy and the way Jackie showed little emotion during the funeral and on TV.)

    Many additional beliefs about expressing emotion were looked down upon for years as western culture had adopted the “rugged individualism” view of dealing with life in all its manifestations. Expressing emotion was out and being strong was definitely in. Keeping emotion within is presently the cultural norm.

    However, psychology and the social sciences have shown time and time again the importance of expressing, in some form, what is happening inside; it can actually save your life. If you have been trained by the authority figures in your life to suppress your feelings or if you are unable to cry (much to do with unconscious beliefs instilled early in life) when one might be expected to do so, consider the following.

    1. We are built to vocalize feelings and tell our stories. This is an inherent and normal human response. Its purpose is to relieve the stress of trauma and massive change that occur in every life. There is a basic human need to externalize the pressure and pain that develops within.

    2. What is the alternative when we bottle the anxiety, anger, fear, guilt or pain that is generated by a major loss? The physical self pays a huge price to perform this task. Stress hormones go into overdrive and every cell in the body is affected. I repeat, every cell in the body is heavily stressed. Energy stores are depleted.

    3. A more vicious result of stuffing feelings is that our unconscious and our memory banks keep them forever alive in full force. Consequently, we are easily thrown into deep pain throughout life when something we see in a movie or on a TV show or read in the paper, cues up the terrible feelings and memories we never dealt with.

    So what can you do? The obvious answer is to find a way to tell your story of pain and disappointment. If you don’t have a best friend who is a good long-term listener, (a resource we all need to develop), then seek out a counselor, clergy person, or support group. You also can express feelings through writing, drawing, painting or sculpting. Reach out to God to unload your burden. You may need several avenues of release.

    Give in to the natural inclination to share the pain of loss. There is nothing weak about doing so. It is not merely highly therapeutic, it will lead to insights into your loss and how to cope with it (verbalizing our feelings often leads to new interpretations and thoughts). When appropriate, request your good listener to give you valuable feedback.

    Make every effort to change the pattern of the way you deal with loss and change and encourage your children to be open with you about their feelings. See the process as wisdom seeking and in making wise choices. Let periodic expression, where you plumb the deepest depths of your feelings, become part of your long-term healing process. We all need the nurturance and feeling of community that sharing feelings naturally brings forth.

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    Source by Lou LaGrand

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  • Holistic Healing for Digestive Disorders

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    The digestive system is very crucial. It assists the body to absorb required nutrients and eliminate waste products. Any problems affecting it can lead to a lot of discomforts. The National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases estimates that the number of Americans affected by digestive disorders to be 60 to 70 million. Luckily, there are natural, holistic healing remedies that can eliminate these diseases. Digestive disorders include the following.

    Heartburn (acid reflux) is a symptom of Gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD). It occurs when contents from the stomach move back into the esophagus causing irritation.

    Gas is simply the air inside your digestive tract. It enters the gut when you swallow it and when undigested foods in your large intestine are broken down by bacteria to release it. Its symptoms include passing gas, burping, stomach pain and bloating.

    • Gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD) occurs when the contents of your stomach return into the esophagus leading to heartburn. GERD is caused by unexpected relaxation of the lower esophageal sphincter.
    • Diarrhea is characterized by loose, watery stools. It leads to malabsorption and dehydration. Diarrhea can be caused by food allergies and intolerances, infections, problems in the digestive tract and medicine side effects.
    • Inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) is a term used to describe two disorders that lead to inflammation of the gastrointestinal tract. They are ulcerative colitis and Crohn’s disease. They both cause abdominal pain, severe diarrhea, stomach cramps, weight loss, and fatigue.
    • Constipation is characterized by fewer than normal bowel movements (less than three a week) or dry, hard and difficult bowel movements that are painful to pass. Other symptoms of constipation may include bloating and stomach pain.
    • Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) is a condition that occurs in the large intestine (colon). It leads to bloating, abdominal pain, diarrhea, gas, and constipation. It is still not clear what causes IBS.

    Nutritional Response testing is the perfect holistic healing remedy to deal with digestive disorders. This form of treatment is pegged on the concept that the body knows and is able to correct its problems. The technique first analyzes the body to identify the root cause of the disorders after which nutritional support and lifestyle changes are recommended to help the body heal itself. Unlike traditional forms of treatment, it does not attempt to mask the symptoms. Instead, it tackles the underlying cause of the problem.

    Holistic Healing

    The first instinct when we experience pain and physical discomfort is to visit a medical professional to address the disease. This is not wrong, and it’s sometimes the best way to deal with the situation. However, physical pain is usually a manifestation of an underlying greater imbalance. Holistic healing appreciates this fact. Instead of dealing with the physical aspect only, it addresses the mental, emotional and spiritual aspects, too. It is not a quick fix. It is a journey to a more balanced lifestyle.

    The body contains different types of chemicals including neurotransmitters, enzymes, and hormones. Chemical imbalances can lead to many disorders in the body. Some diets can inhibit or stimulate hormone production and neurotransmitters thus leading to chemical imbalances. What appears to work for one individual might not work for another. That is why Nutritional Response Testing is perfect for identifying chemical imbalances. It can be customized to fit each individual’s needs.

    Are you struggling with any disorders? Are you looking for a safe, less invasive and effective treatment to deal with your condition? Nutritional Response testing is one of the best holistic healing remedies. You don’t have to suffer any longer.

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    Source by Dr. Louis Granirer

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  • How to Deal With the Dilemmas of Gay Dating

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    Unhappy relationships, fights and breakups can mess up your mind and discourage you from dating again. But, one bad relationship doesn’t mean that you are not going to date anyone ever again. Look around, there are men out there who are just like you, and they’ve had breakups and broken hearts too. The moment you find the one who is truly in love with you, it will make you forget all those failed attempts.

    And when you do find a perfect match, many of you might have dilemmas that can break your burgeoning relationship. For this reason, you need to know what those gay dating dilemmas can be and what you can do to avoid them.

    ‘Let go’ of the past

    Every gay man has stories about ‘coming out’, childhood, parents, fear and broken hearts. But don’t let things that happened in the past affect your present or future. It was a thing of the past, so use it as knowledge & wisdom. Give a fresh and healthy start to your new relationship.

    Expensive dates when you are in different income brackets

    The difference in income can become a major cause of breakups. You have a higher income and want to plan expensive dates, and you’re ready to make all the payments. But this can sometimes offend the other person and you don’t even realize. So, you need to keep the other person’s feelings in mind and plan accordingly.

    Be a fearless gay dating guy

    First of all, you need to be yourself, one who is not afraid of dating. Even if you try to show that you are a fearless gay dating guy, if he feels that you are afraid, it means you probably really are. So, get things clear in your mind before you start dating as breaking someone’s heart isn’t good for either of you.

    Express your feelings

    Don’t hide your feelings from the person you love. Express your feelings but if you think you still need to wait for the right time, then do! Sometimes though, there is no right time to express your love, every moment is right, so just open up and don’t leave it too late. Today, a number of online sites offer gay dating tips, so take their help.

    Stop comparing

    You are special, unique, and nobody can compete with you. Stop comparing yourself with your boyfriend’s ex or anyone else as it will lead you nowhere and will just ruin your relationship.

    Communication is key

    Yes, when dating someone, you need to have adequate communication with each other. Whether you prefer to communicate via text, or calls, or in person, make sure that you have healthy conversations with each other. Also, if your mate prefers to talk over a call while you want to communicate via texts, there’s no harm picking up his call, rather than creating unwanted turmoil in a relationship.

    Be honest & open up in a genuine way

    Don’t just presume you’ll be able to be intimate with a new person on your very first date. Take your time, understand each other and then discuss if you can move further in your relationship. Only if the other person is comfortable, go ahead and make love.

    Today’s technologically advanced world helps you find a perfect match sitting at home. A number of online gay dating sites will help you search for a compatible match the easy way. Moreover, these sites sometimes also provide gay dating tips so that you can have a healthy and happy relationship.

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    Source by Sarah Scott

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  • The Success Avoidance Syndrom

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    Life is full of ironies and paradoxes. One of the most amazing of these is the human tendency to cry for and cling to those things that hurt them. As one notable poet put it, “people run for their chains.” Is it not amazing that people generally dislike prisons, and yet it is a known fact that many former prisoners would rather be in prison than out of it? How many people out there are clinging to and crying for relationships, and yet they fully know that those same relationships are dysfunctional and leading nowhere?

    How many companies, individuals and nations are tenaciously holding onto solutions that have passed their sale by date? How many people desire to lose weight and to be in good health, and yet daily crave for and indulge in those behaviors that negate this aim? My proposition is that there are many. Perhaps the most debilitating human condition is the success avoidance syndrome. Put simply, people have this tendency to want and wish for success, and yet simultaneously unwittingly avoid the things that make for success. They desire success but hasten their feet towards failure. Below is a synopsis of the traits of the success avoiding individual.

    o Risk Avoidance.

    Many people want to succeed in life but they are averse to risk. However, the very nature of success is that the greater the risk involved the greater the rewards. Every opportunity carries within it a certain amount of risk. To try is to risk failing; to propose is to risk being turned down; to love is to risk heartbreak; to advance is to risk repulsion and resistance; to lead is to risk criticism and being cartooned; to express yourself is to risk appearing a fool; to seek profits is to risk making losses; to put your views to the public (like I am doing now) is to risk being ridiculed; to trust people is to risk being disappointed; to be yourself is to risk being rejected; to be a copycat is to court frustration; to write an exam is to risk failure and disappointment; to communicate is to risk being misunderstood, to buy something is to risk dissatisfaction and dissonance; to get an insurance policy is to risk paying for a service that may never become necessary.

    It is true that risk is often uncomfortable. However, the alternative which is failure, frustration and underachievement is even worse. Not only is the alternative very discomfiting, but it is also painful. Any risk minimization strategy is therefore actually a success reduction mechanism. A faint heart never wins a fair lady, and there is no crown for the coward. It is that simple. The winners know that the greatest risk in life is to risk nothing. After all to be alive is to risk dying some day and we will all die, so what is the big deal?

    Before we leave the subject of risk it is important to underline that there is a big difference between taking risks and taking gambles. To gamble is to put oneself at the mercy of fate and chance. With gambling one has no influence over the outcome at all and a good example is lottery. However, when one takes risk one does not become a prisoner of fate but remains a participator in a process in which the success is not guaranteed, but the chances thereof can be influenced by one’s own decisions and actions. There is no self determination with gambling, but the risk taker retains some control.

    o Failure Avoidance

    The person obsessed with avoiding failure learns to do nothing. It is only that person that never does anything, that never makes mistakes. In truth there is no effort without shortcomings. However, action is a progenitor of success and it follows logically that the person who never engages in meaningful and serious action by this very act of omission avoids success. Activity, of course is not to be confused with progress, but there can never be progress without activity. Failure avoidance is success avoidance. Period.

    Failure avoidance is a learnt habit. Research indicates that families, companies and environments replete with criticism, cynicism, pessimism, threats of punishment and motivation by fear are a good breeding ground for failure avoiders. To the contrary affirmation, recognition, acknowledgement, praise, reward and encouragement constitute the diet of the success pursuers. Creativity and innovation cannot co-habit with fear of failure and punishment.

    The failure avoiders are regulated by their fear of failure, but the winners are inspired by their dreams. In most cases the failure avoiders keep fresh the memories of their past failures, catastrophes, fiascos and heartbreaks. Their minds are filled with imaginations of pain and failure and negative outcomes. They always fear and expect the worst. They think in terms of and look for limits, but the winner thinks in terms of and looks for opportunities.

    The loser is therefore always running away from limits, while the winner is running towards opportunity. The winner recognizes that limits and opportunities are one and the same thing. The difference lies in the eye of the beholder and how he chooses to interpret what he sees. The failure avoider sees the challenges as stumbling blocks to be avoided but the winner sees them as stepping stones to be embraced and utilized. In truth every challenge brings with it an opportunity to grow, but it is easy to miss this opportunity if one sees it as a burden, problem or disappointment.

    What have you been avoiding all your life and of late? What have you been hesitating to do? Is it a conversation, telephone call or important decision? Whatever it is, take time to reflect on whether your avoidance does not constitute success avoidance. To be continued, expect some more.

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    Source by George Chingarande

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  • Scalar Wave Healing Brings Relief in Various Ailments

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    People also suffer from gangrene in which their foot gets discolored, the skin starts peeling off and sometimes it gets infected. If not treated on time, it may lead to amputation of the foot or death in severe cases. This is a condition that requires immediate treatment.

    Gangrene is basically caused when the circulation of blood reduces or stops. The reason behind this condition is blood cells clumping that results in the slow flow of blood in the extremities. The problem can be alleviated only when the flow of blood is increased, but this is easier said than done.

    In such extreme cases, Scalar Wave healing has proven to be quite helpful. Almost a hundred years ago, Nicola Tesla, a famous inventor experimented with this healing style, but its practical application came into existence after a lot of research and development. The results of scalar energy are stunning. It occurs when similar waves are superimposed at 180 degree difference in phase. The energy as a result of this process is more like a field instead of a wave. This field has proven to have a lot of impact on the body.

    The reason behind gangrene is a blockage in circulation and any therapy that helps in increasing circulation can bring about a remarkable change in the problem. Several studies have been conducted to show that the scalar energy healing method helped in unclumping of blood cells that were clumped together. This resulted in increased circulation, which will bring blood that is rich in oxygen to the affected areas thereby helping in healing.

    Chakra healing is another therapy, which has proved to be quite beneficial in providing healing in case of various ailments. Leaving a significant imprint on anything that is exposed, scalar energy offers a static waveform which is unique in itself. It has been confirmed through several studies that objects like pendants and bracelets which comes embedded with waves of scalar energy offers impressive healing benefits.

    For gangrene treatment, chakra healing also proves to be advantageous. A powerful treatment is required for treating this condition as it can soon go downhill if not treated immediately. Bio field therapeutics can help a great deal in treating this problem. The aura gets affected with scalar energy in a highly objective manner using various physical objects generating or carrying energy rather than using energy generated by a human practitioner. When this energy is used on the human body, the bio field that radiates from outside the body and the one that works internally permeating body tissues is improved radically with the scalar wave.

    Several studies conducted in this field have proven to be quite advantageous and beneficial in the treatment of various ailments. It can also address serious ailments like gangrene. It has also helped in treating complicated ailments. Thus, use of alternative therapies like scalar energy healing is being used increasingly.

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    Source by Tom Paladino

    Views: 0

  • Alternative Medicine Treatment of Plantar Fasciitis

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    Plantar fasciitis (PF) affects approximately two-million people in the US, of both athletic and non-athletic populations. This condition can be debilitating and significantly affect one’s quality of life in a very negative way. There are few high quality studies on this condition and the most successful treatments. Treatments range from chiropractic care, physical therapy, injections and surgeries. Fortunately this condition can typically be resolved with conservative treatment and lifestyle modifications that can prevent going under the knife. Simply put, plantar fasciitis is a strain with subsequent inflammation of the thick tissue (plantar fascia) and muscles on the bottom of the foot causing heel pain. Plantar fasciitis (PF) is characterized by biting heel/mid arch pain when first bearing weight in the morning, or after long periods of rest. The pain typically subsides within 5 minutes of walking or running, then worsens with long term activity or weight bearing. It is also associated with tired, achy feet at the end of the day and foot cramps. PF is seen in both active and inactive people, and is rarely the result of an acute injury. PF can be the result of several different factors: repetitive overuse injuries, poor fitting footwear, overtraining, structural abnormalities of the foot and improper gait mechanics. PF often becomes a chronic and/or recurring problem if not given the appropriate treatment and follow up care.

    Some contributing factors to the development of plantar fasciitis:

    Structural abnormalities: Plantar fasciitis is very commonly seen with pes planus (pictured left), or flat footed individuals. As you can see, this individual’s medial arch is almost flush with the ground. This can create strain on the plantar fascia. Severe injuries resulting in the need for surgical fusion of the foot can also create strain on the plantar fascia. In these cases of severe structural abnormalities, orthotics are typically indicated. Rehabilitation including foot strengthening exercises, chiropractic manipulation and soft tissue techniques can relieve pain and help to alleviate strain on the tissues and resolve flair ups. We use custom orthotics from Foot Levelers in our office. Using a 3-D scanner, we can have custom orthotics made to support the full structure of your foot.

    Poorly fitting footwear: Wearing improper footwear over time can lead to PF. If a shoe doesn’t fit your foot properly, your gait is altered during any weight bearing activity. This has an effect on the entire kinetic chain and can ultimately cause strain on the plantar fascia. The strength and flexibility of your foot will determine your best type of footwear.

    Overtraining: Can be a huge contributor to PF. What many athletes, weekend warriors and the like tend to overlook is the importance of recovery in their training regimens. If your tissues don’t have optimal nutrition, rest and repair time they start DEgenerate rather than REgenerate. Especially when it comes to long distance running, or quick sprints, the feet have a lot of demand.

    Nerve Impingement: Plantar fasciitis can be a symptom of sciatic nerve impingement. The sciatic nerve is the thickest nerve in your body. It originates from your lumbosacral plexus of nerves typically L4-S1/S2 with some individual anatomical variation. Although this nerve is commonly blamed for all radiating leg pain, it is only responsible for pain along its trajectory down the posterior aspect of the leg and foot. In some impingement cases, the pain can skip the back of the leg altogether and go straight to the foot. Impingement along any portion of the nerve can result in pain, but it doesn’t have to be in the leg. If there is enough impingement along this nerve, any added pressure, say forced dorsiflexion of the foot when standing or walking, can be just the right tension to create exquisite foot pain. Our bodies are always trying to protect our nervous system; reflexively the muscles surrounding the nerve will tighten in an attempt to avoid any further stretch or tension of the nerve. Ultimately, this leads to inflammation of the plantar fascia and the surrounding muscles.

    Other Factors:

    Systemic Inflammation: Though general systemic inflammation is typically not the cause of plantar fasciitis, it will increase your symptoms. For this reason we strongly encourage our patients to eat an anti-inflammatory diet specific to their needs. We also understand no one is perfect or eats perfect all the time, which is why we encourage an 80/20 approach; eat clean 80% of the time and use the other 20% to indulge. Curcuminoids, like those found in turmeric are great to help blot down inflammation in acute cases of plantar fasciitis.

    Alternatives to conservative care:

    Cortisone or steroid injections are very commonly given for Plantar fasciitis. In some really tough cases this can absolutely be necessary to “put out the fire” that is the inflammatory cascade, to get you out of pain initially. We never recommend looking at this option as a cure. Cortisone is a very powerful anti-inflammatory that alleviates pain without correcting the underlying issue, potentiating further injury and recurrent episodes. Another option is surgical intervention. In some cases, surgery is the best option for a particular case. We prefer to exhaust conservative treatment options before travelling down this avenue. A study on an overweight and obese population (43 total) suffering with plantar fasciitis for an average of 34.8 months, were given decompressive surgery to the nerve to the abductor digiti minimi with partial plantar fascia release and tracked over a 4-year period. It was found that 75.6% of patients were in deed pain-free or had only mild pain post-surgery (pain decreased from an 8.5/10 to a 2.5/10). However patient satisfaction post-surgery was only 48%.

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    Source by Ann Barter

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  • Should You Attempt To Show Your Spouse Affection During A Marital Separation?

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    Many people who are reluctantly separated are not sure how they are supposed to act around their separated spouse. This can seem very odd. After all, this is your spouse that we are talking about. Chances are, you have known him for a very long time and being around him should feel as natural as breathing. However, if you are separated and want to reconcile, you can sometimes sense that you are on shaky ground with your spouse. You don’t want to do or say anything that will make him uncomfortable or drive him away. And yet, the wish to reach out to him can be hard to ignore.

    Someone might ask, “How do people handle the showing of affection during trial separations? My husband and I have only been separated for a short time and honestly, I’m not quite sure of protocol here. My husband was over visiting the kids this weekend and we were discussing a sad issue with my husband’s extended family. My husband was upset and I went to hug him, with no ulterior motive whatsoever. I simply wanted to give him some comfort. I didn’t really think about it beforehand. But when I did it, I felt my husband bristle. He literally stiffened at my touch. I pulled away and tried not to make a big deal of it. Later I talked about this with one of my friends and she suggested that perhaps I should not show physical affection to my husband while we are separated. She said that when you separated, you aren’t necessarily loving on one another. Is this true? Should I not be showing affection to my husband right now? He wanted to separate. I did not, but none of this means that I don’t love him anymore. If I shouldn’t show him affection, I could stop. But I don’t really want to. I feel like I’ve already lost so much. Do people really not show affection while separated?”

    It really does depend on the couple. I know some couples who continue to hug, kiss, have sex, etc, while separated. And I know others who hesitate to touch in any way. There is really no hard and fast rule about this. And in my opinion and observation (based and on my own separation,) I think that it is best if you either follow the understandings that you’ve already established. Or, if you have not established boundaries, you either ask now or read your spouse’s cues to determine his comfort level.

    My husband seemed pretty uncomfortable in similar situations and finally I just asked him. I literally said, “Should I not do this?” when I attempted to reach out to him. My husband didn’t flat out tell me no, but he was clearly not comfortable with physical affection in the beginning of our separation. So I eventually decided to just allow him to take the lead. That way, I didn’t have to worry about doing something that would hurt communication between us. Instead, I eventually focused on trying to be comfortable and to laugh and relax with one another so that he’d want to keep communicating. Further down the road, he was the one to initiate physical affection and I believe that this worked best for us, but that may not be true of every couple.

    I do also know that things may change from one day to the next. There might be a time when your spouse pulls away from you and then three days later, he’s reaching out to hug you. It can certainly be confusing and can give you mixed signals. However, I don’t think that you can ever go wrong by being friendly and supportive, but also observant as to how he is acting and how receptive that he might be at the time.

    I realize that this is frustrating. I used to think during my own separation that it just should not be so hard to know how to act around my own husband. But I think that if I would have pressed the issue and pushed affection when he wasn’t receptive, that might have delayed our progress even more. I learned that you really do have to take a gradual approach and just accept the progress that you are given.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

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  • Follow the Yellow Brick Road to More Sales

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    When Dorothy landed in Oz, she wanted to go home and was told by the Munchkins to see the great and powerful Wizard of Oz. “But how do I find the Wizard”, she asked. “Follow the Yellow Brick Road”. “And the best way to start, is at the beginning”. And that holds true for the Sandler System as well. Start at the beginning.

    The beginning step in the Sandler Sales Process is to establish bonding and rapport with your prospect. Once you’ve created a good relationship with this person, you can then set an up-front contract on what you will discuss, typically their agenda and yours, with a specific outcome in mind. This up-front contract should lead them down the path towards revealing some pain. If there’s no pain to reveal, then you can shake hands and part as friends, and move on to the next prospect. However, if you do reveal some pain, then you schedule a next meeting where you can delve deeper into the prospects issues and pain.

    THE PAIN FUNNEL IN ACTION

    Let’s look at a sample story showing the pain funnel in action. In this story, our sales person works for a contractor who builds navigation systems for fighter jets, and has an appointment to see Henry Jones. Henry has an engineering background and is very technical in nature. Watch how the sales person starts out using the questions from the Sandler Pain Funnel to better understand his prospect, and then slowly moves Henry through the funnel towards a sale. The questions are broad at first, but then become more specific and designed to make the prospect more emotional. The idea is to grasp Henry’s problems and lead him to reveal how the problems affect Henry personally.

    Henry starts by asking the salesperson, “Can you design a system that will easily retro- fit our F-16s so that rewiring will not be problematic?” As you can see, this is a very technical question for a very technical problem. The salesperson can try one of one two things: answer the question directly and speak about the product’s features and benefits, or try to uncover the real intent of the question and ultimately, if there’s any pain. In this example, the salesperson employs the Pain Funnel to dig for the pain behind the prospect’s question. The salesperson responds, “You know, that’s a great question. Can you tell me more about that?” Henry answers back, “Yes. We’ve had some experiences retrofitting F-16s with different types of equipment and ran into some challenges. It takes a very long time to rewire the system, and that becomes problematic when you have to disconnect wiring harnesses and lots of other systems that are related to whatever it is we are installing.” The salesperson probes, “Can you be a bit more specific? Give me an example.”

    Keep in mind, each and every question the salesperson asks comes from the Pain Funnel. Even though the questions are in order, you can tell it offers a very smooth arc to the overall conversation. If you have internalized the questions and the process, it won’t feel awkward guiding a prospect through the Pain Funnel in exactly the order prescribed.

    Henry continues, “Well, recently we had to retrofit replacements into the planes. We had to take out the ejection seats and remove some of the navigational systems. We even had to get into the hydraulics. So, what we originally anticipated would be a 25-hour job turned into a job that lasted close to 200 hours. It’s not so much the hours that really bothers us as the amount of time the fighters have to be out of service in order to get it done.” The salesperson continues down the Pain Funnel, “How long has that been a problem?” “It’s been two years that we’ve been dealing with this,” Henry replies. “OK. What have you tried to do about that?” the salesperson asks, following the Pain Funnel method exactly.

    Henry answers, “We talked to a contractor to see if there was a possible fix, and they came up with some recommendations.” The salesperson goes to the next Pain Funnel question: “And did that work?” Henry responds, “The only potentially viable solution they came up with was to redesign the entire system. That would actually take the planes out of commission for even longer.” The salesperson asks, “Do you have any idea how much that would cost you?” “A lot. But it’s not just dollars. It also puts peoples’ lives at risk. Every day that one of those planes is out of service, we risk not having a jet ready to protect people”, Henry says more emotionally now. “How do you feel about that?” the salesperson asks sincerely. (Or alternatively, the salesperson could ask, “What’s your level of commitment to seeing if there is a way to make sure this problem doesn’t happen again?”) “Honestly? We’re very upset this is happening, and we have to get it fixed. We need solutions that minimize the amount of time these planes are out of service. Do you think you can help us?”, Henry pleads.

    THAT’S HOW IT WORKS

    In our prior scenario, the salesperson effectively uncovered Henry’s pain. So what’s next? Uncover even more pain. An effective Pain Step means uncovering 3 to 5 elements of pain the prospect is dealing with. However, don’t use the same approach each time, vary it a bit to keep the prospect unaware of what you are doing. A classic bit of sales wisdom is, “The best presentation you will ever give is the one the prospect doesn’t see.” Since the prospect has revealed to you what to present in order to win the sale, you will want to move forward in the sales process by offering direct solutions that relieve his pain. However, don’t do it right away. First, be sure you really have uncovered three to five pains, and done a good job on the Budget and Decision Steps. In other words, stay within the Sandler Seven Step process. At this point, you will be ready to present the appropriate solutions in the Fulfillment Step. Moreover, if you’ve done your job correctly, like Dorothy did, and followed the Yellow Brick Road to Oz, all you need to do is click the Ruby Slippers together and the deal will close itself, and may even take you some where over the rainbow!

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    Source by Greg Nanigian

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