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Relief for a Sore Penis – Healing After Aggressive Sex
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A good roll in the hay or an especially sensual round of solo action can lead men to unbelievable ecstasy, followed a glow of satisfaction and a sense of relaxation and well-being. However, it can also lead to soreness, aching and a lingering feeling of discomfort – not the takeaway most men are looking for from the experience. While a sore penis after sex is common, and in general nothing serious, knowing how to prevent the pain from happening, and how to relieve it when it does occur – can improve men’s overall penis health and even enhance the sensations they feel during the proceedings.

What causes penis pain?

Penis pain can occur for a number of reasons and can even be related to more than one of these factors:
- Chafing – while the sliding, gliding and thrusting of sex feels tremendous in the moment, there is actually a lot of heat being generated by the friction. Most men won’t notice this when it is happening, unless things are particularly dry, but when the heat of the moment is over, this chafing can lead to red, raw-looking skin, or even the appearance of a rash. Over time, friction from intercourse or masturbation can cause the skin to overcompensate during healing, and a thicker layer of keratinized dermal tissue may be the result. Since this callus-like tissue can actually block pleasurable sensation, preventing it from occurring through regular moisturizing and use of a lube is highly recommended.
- Irritation – the penis skin is fairly delicate, and exposure to a partner’s body fluids, as well as lubes, latex, or other substances which may come into play can cause the skin to become irritated. Redness, itching, burning and even swelling may ensue. Avoiding known irritants is important here, so if a reaction seems to occur any time a particular product is used, eliminating this from the process is a good idea.
- Blunt force trauma or torsion – in a heated moment, it is natural to get overly enthusiastic, but abrupt moves can lead to sudden impact with a partner’s pelvic bone or with a sudden twist or turn that can cause penis pain and even rupture the penile tissue. Taking care during play sessions and avoiding sudden, forceful moves may take some of the excitement out of the process, but it can also prevent a world of hurt later on.
How to relieve a sore penis

When soreness and injuries do occur, pain relief may be the first thing on a man’s mind. In some cases, all that is needed is a little time off, but in others, some TLC at home can do the trick. Applying cold compresses (not too cold, or frostbite can be a real danger) or using an over-the-counter oral pain reliever may help to take the edge off while things heal. It is always a good idea to check with a doctor before trying any self-care techniques, however, especially in the case of sudden injury or for men who are being treated for other medical conditions.

When professional help is needed

If a penile injury is accompanied by a popping sound and/or sharp pain; if bruising or bleeding occurs; or if a man experiences an erection that does not dissipate after several hours, prompt medical attention is necessary to treat potentially serious issues.

Extra support for a stressed, sore penis

Aside from pain relief and waiting out the healing process, men can take some proactive steps, not only to promote healing, but also to prevent a recurrence of the problem:
- First of all, using a lubricant – and a little bit of common sense – for future sessions can also help to prevent injuries from friction, accidental impact, or sudden bending or twisting.
- Second, in order to heal properly, the penile tissues need to work harder than normal. Repairing damaged tissue requires essential nutrients that men can obtain through a penis vitamin cream. (health professionals recommend Man 1 Man Oil) that is fortified with vitamins and amino acids, as well as natural emollients for extra relief. After the healing process is complete, continuing to apply a quality penis health cream can help to reduce the degree of cellular damage that can result from rough treatment.
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Source by John Dugan

Views: 0
November 11, 2022
The Anatomy of an MLM Business Blog Post

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A blog post has working elements that make it one of the best forms of content in today’s MLM business environments. The way it is constructed can make or break the marketing of the business itself. The purpose or goal of the blog is usually two-fold, to drive traffic and to educate the reader. However, the goals can be different then what’s listed here. Whatever goals that you decide should reflect on the design and promotion of the individual posts.

The layout of the blog

The MLM business blog consists of a consistent format that allows the reader to consume the material easily. The format or layout includes the title, any subheadings, body text, URL links, closing and call for action. Don’t be shy to elaborate on a topic under multiple subheadings. Each sub heading should reflect on the main theme from your introductory paragraph.

The body text must align with the topic of the subheading and that in turn relate to the main topic of the MLM business blog. The layout is simple, from title to each subheading, to the closing and call to action. That is how it flows. You can get fancy with the call to action and other aspects but that is for another day. Each paragraph should be no longer than a hundred words each, 75 is really the target to hit. However, this will not always be the case.

Once you hit towards the end of your blog post. You can wrap things up nicely with a closing that is followed by a call to action. The closing can be 50 words with a shorter call for action. Every post should offer at least one call to action that leads further into the lead cycle. You can measure the success of them with Google analytics. Once you have your draft done. You can then tweak the layout and start editing the content. Use a good spell and grammar checker. Don’t forget to find an image that is relevant to the written material. Put it aside for an hour or two and then come back and review it again with a clear mind.

Your blog is only effective through effort

It takes time and patience to write good blogs for your MLM business. These tips are just for writing one. It only includes some technical aspects but they are important enough to go over and adopt for your needs. Thank you for reading.

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Source by David L. Feinstein

Views: 0

November 10, 2022
How Changing Your Mindset Can Change Your Life
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If you have been struggling to lose weight, improve a relationship, find a new job or just have more fun, the answer may be in your mindset. Mindset is a concept developed over a decade ago by Stanford University psychologist Carol Dweck through her research to understand how people cope with failures. Dweck defines mindset as the view we adopt of ourselves and proved that it can profoundly affect how we live our lives. She found that people generally fall into two categories, those with a fixed mindset and those with a growth mindset. A “fixed” mindset suggests that our intelligence, ability and personality are carved in stone and do not change much over our lifetime. An example of this mindset might be “I am not athletic”” or “I am a math person” which suggest that these traits can’t change. The downside to a “fixed” mindset is these kinds of beliefs limit personal growth. By contrast, a “growth” mindset suggests that individuals have basic abilities but can develop and cultivate these and other abilities or intelligence and talents through effort and strategies. This view allows for potential to grow and opens us to greater possibility and success. Adopting a growth mindset can improve all areas of life from personal to professional. Changing from a fixed mindset to a growth can be accomplished through three steps.

Three Steps to Grow Your Mindset

According to Dweck, a growth mindset is based on the belief that we can change throughout our lifetime. While changing our beliefs can be challenging, the growth mindset can be developed in small steps.
1. Awareness of how we think. The first step is to become aware of our behavior. When we tune into our thoughts and start to notice our reaction to challenges, criticism and setbacks, we can notice patterns where we are stuck. Challenges, criticism and setbacks are roadblocks with a fixed mindset. For example, a fixed mindset reaction to a difficult challenge is to question whether we can succeed. If we don’t think we can, why would we try only to fail. For instance, the thought “I am not going to volunteer to help my boss with that project because I am not sure I have all the skills. If I fail, I will look like a fool in front of my co-workers” is limiting the possibility for growth. In addition, constructive criticism is taken as an affront and a typical “fixed” mindset response is to become defensive and feel like a failure. “I can’t believe she told me my paper needed work. I am a horrible writer.” Setbacks can be a reason to give up because they reinforce our belief that we did not have the ability in the first place. “I auditioned and didn’t get a part. I knew I wasn’t a good singer.”
2. Choice, The second step is to take this awareness and begin to see each of these is a choice. While it is comfortable to stay with our habitual responses, growth occurs when we make choices to change our limiting beliefs. A limiting belief keeps us in a safe zone but also keeps us from growth. For example, if my limiting belief is “I can never lose weight because my parents were overweight”, why try at all? This choice is to default to limiting thoughts. Or in the setback example of not being selected because of lack of natural ability, the response is a choice to give up because I “failed” and my ability is fixed. The growth choice requires more effort to stretch our abilities or maybe change the strategy.
3. Challenge the belief. The final step is to challenge the belief as it comes up. To challenge these beliefs, it is important to see challenges, criticism or setbacks as opportunity for growth. For instance, in the above example of the audition “although I did not get this part, I learned about the audition process and I will continue to take voice lessons because it is important to me and I enjoy it. I might not get a part the next time I will keep trying new strategies. I can ask for feedback and see how I might improve.” The shift from focusing solely on the result to enjoying the process to critical with a growth mindset. In addition, being open to feedback helps us develop much more than seeing it as a failure. Dweck suggests incorporating the phrase “I am not there yet” instead of “I failed” to stay encouraged to keep trying. As Henry Ford said “whether you think you can or think you can’t – you are right!”
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Source by Liz Brown

Views: 0
November 10, 2022
Why Can’t I Forget My Ex Wife? Help for Moving on After Divorce

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It is 3 a.m. Silence echoes inside the empty house. You know you will not meet tomorrow’s deadline for that project at work, but you don’t care. All this seems so trivial. It’s been that way a year now. A veil has been covering your perception, your goals and your aspirations. Only this one phrase keeps repeating itself inside your mind: “Why Can’t I Forget my Ex Wife?” You keep wondering if there was anything you could have done to save this marriage. You cannot understand why you sink deeper and deeper into this vicious circle inside your mind, instead of getting over it. They say time heals, but it does not seem to be happening to you. Time cannot heal, unless you want it to.

Healing from divorce for men is just as hard as it is for women, maybe even harder. The reason for this is that women express their emotions, but for men it’s not as easy. They suppress their feelings. They struggle to abide by the role imposed to them by society and this always backfires. The pain inside of them accumulates and it multiplies to the point that it becomes unbearable.

1. Express Yourself

This is the most important thing you need to do during and long after the divorce. The phrase “men do not cry” couldn’t be far from the truth. Men do cry, but they do so in solitude. Do not struggle to hold back your tears in the company of a dear friend.

2. Communicate

Talk about it for hours with your friends and relatives, if you feel the need to.

3. Avoid By All Means Mutual Contacts

Whatever you say will be more than likely transferred in a distorted version to your ex-wife and vice versa. This creates a never-ending gossiping circle, which completely destroys a man’s chances to recover after divorce.

If contact with mutual friends and relatives is inevitable, demand that they do not talk to you about this matter.

4. Get It Out Of Your System

A day will come, when you are finally sick and tired of mourning. Gather all the pictures, letters and any other reminders and keep them in a safe place away from your sight. Stop going to places you went together. If you are the one who’s kept the house, move to a new house or even area.

5. Avoid Rebound Relationships

Most of the times, these relationships do not work. They slow down a man’s healing process after divorce and they end up hurting even more people.

6. Take A Trip Alone

Take a trip on your own to some remote, peaceful place with warm climate and tranquil water for swimming. It will help you relax, realize the beauty that still exists around you and give you the opportunity for introspection. All the pain you’ve gone through will be for nothing, if you do not learn from it.

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Source by Larry J Milton

Views: 0

November 10, 2022
3 Ways Web Design Works to Help Your Business Grow

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As you know, web design and development affects your business and audience. It is the first thing they see concerning your business, so it ought to make a good impression. Below are three important aspects of web design:

1. Makes the first impression

Like I said, your website is the first thing a potential client sees before knowing your services and how your business works. Those first few seconds are essential in your business because they determines if a potential client would become a client or not. And, it also determines your bounce rate. Would the client leave the site almost immediately? Or would they stay and check your services out?

An unappealing website or – God forbid – an outdated one would make your audience immediately bounce. This is because first impression matters. What they see first – your branding and website – matters a lot on your business. So you should always keep yourself and your business up to date on the latest technological trends and developments.

2. Helps your SEO

A great web design is beyond how great it looks or how easy it is to navigate. Although these two are important on their own, a great web design should also be SEO-friendly.

A great way to stay on top of your game among your competition is SEO. Let SEO be integrated into your website design from scratch on a long-term basis, and watch as your website improves its rankings in search engines like Google or Bing.

If you don’t know how to integrate SEO into your website, do not leave it for a latter period. Instead, get a professional web developer who knows what he/she is doing.

3. Builds up the character for your company

How your website looks and feels to your audience is how they perceive the customer service to be. For example, when you enter a company for the first time, several things happens. You get recognised as a potential client, and immediately get attended to by the receptionist. The receptionist further directs you to either the waiting room or the person in charge directly.

If you get transferred to the waiting room, you would be given certain refreshments – like coffee or tea – depending on your preference. And when you finally meet the person who would handle your request, the manner at which he/she treats you, their character, is what makes you stay or leave.

The same thing goes for websites. Your website tells a potential client how the character of the company is. So you have to ask yourself, is your website user-friendly? Natural? Welcoming? Easy to navigate through? And most importantly, is it SEO-friendly, so that more clients can find your business?

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Source by Karina Popa

Views: 0

November 10, 2022
Health Anxiety and Solutions

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It's always important to take care of oneself using all the principles of good health. Regular check-ups, proper nutrition and healthful living all enable one to keep on top of their health in a careful yet reasonable way. Often one becomes overly concerned with health issues and caught up in a cycle of health worries. One health issue is reconciled when another immediately pops up to take its place. These worries become all encompassing and exhausting after a while.

Eventually, the individual realizes that this cycle of health anxieties has intruded upon the quality of their life. A dark cloud, always hovering over daily living, this intrusive form of anxiety has to be addressed. One begins by determining why this is occurring, what purpose does it serve and how to interrupt this behavior.

Reason for Health Anxiety

Health worries actually serve a purpose and this purpose is not difficult to detect if one looks deep enough into this pattern of behavior. Often this pattern involves the brain distracting from specific emotions which the individual finds difficult to address.

Many emotions are so overwhelming, such as anger, grief or fear, that the brain looks for ways to distract. Health worries fit the bill because when one worries intensely about their health, there is little room to address an upsetting emotion.

Health worries blanket every other thought and this WORKS. This is the perfect distraction from unsettling emotions. When one worry is reconciled, another takes it place to veil the unaddressed emotion. Each health worry has a strong purpose, as it masks the true upsetting emotion, which is much more difficult to face in the long run.

Solution

– Recognition and acknowledgment of the Health Anxiety habit, one worry quickly following another in a noticeable loop that never ends. Awareness of this cycle is always the first step to reconciliation of the issue.

– Determining if this health worry is a true physical problem by visiting one's primary physician and ruling out a definite physical cause for the difficulty. Always rule out a physical cause before assuming it is merely health anxiety.

– Noticing that these health worries settle down when you become intensely interested in another topic or swept into a new relationship, job or cause.

– Identify your patterns. Do you experience twinges of symptoms that often jump from one area of the body to another? Do you find yourself overestimating physical intrusions and instantly jump to the conclusion that they signify danger or warrant the attention of an alert?

– Find interests that involve your entire being. Lose yourself in things that allow you little time for inward thinking. True illness does not surface through boredom as do these behaviors. True health problems do not generally follow the same time table as health anxieties do. Health worries are stronger during times of boredom and when one lacks interests. An intelligent mind requires challenges and goals.

– Activity is an important therapeutic tool against health worries. Exercise and movement invigorate and stimulate the mind and body in a positive way. Endorphins are released and Serotonin levels are boosted naturally when activity is a part of a daily routine. Moderate walking, jogging, tennis, swimming and dancing are all helpful activities that bring forth positive results.

– Nutrition is also essential to good health which in itself helps eliminate the strong habit of negative thinking, often concerning health worries. When eating properly, Serotonin levels are naturally boosted and blood sugar levels remain stable. This helps settle down an over-reactive mind, leading to a lessening in health anxieties.

– Talk back to the brain by firmly telling it to stop when health worries enter the mind. Shift into a more positive mode of thinking because you always have a choice in what you think about.

The mind will respond by quieting down as negative thoughts subside. The brain, caught red handed in this behavior is instantly embarrassed causing it to suspend this cycle of negative thought. This is comparative to a child being caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Embarrassment at being caught, stops this intrusive behavior.

– Be aware of "what if" thinking. If the majority of sentences you think begin with "what if" then this is proof of a strong health anxiety habit. Change "what if" thinking to "so what" and watch the cycle break.

Most of all, understand that worry solves nothing. Health worries, in particular will only serve to exhaust and deplete both mind and body. Consciously make a concerted effort to change the way you think and you will succeed in changing your life. You will go from self victimization to freedom from the intrusive habit of fearful worry.

You always have a choice. Life can be wonderful and fulfilling when you learn to alter your perspective and chose a more positive point of view. You always have a choice. Never define yourself by your habit of worried thinking. Do not be victimized by health anxiety and fear. With a few simple corrections, especially in thinking, you will find your life changes from being difficult and upsetting to becoming easier and much more fulfilling on a daily basis.

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Source by Dr.

Views: 0

November 10, 2022
Why Healing Requires Integrating Our Unconscious Experiences Into The Wholeness Of Our Being
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Nurture The Deepest Part Of Your Core Nature

Healing involves integrating our fragmented parts into the entirety of our being. However, the paradox is: we are not broken but merely disassociated from our wholeness. The term healing denotes restoring what is not functioning as it is intended. When we are caught up in the distorted beliefs about ourselves, it leads to separation or what we consider being broken. In fact, it is merely being separated from the completeness of our true nature. Think in terms of a hologram where the whole is contained in every part. This was an idea espoused by the late theoretical physicist David Bohm who believed the universe is a solid and brilliant hologram. He recognized how each part of our physical reality contained information about the whole. Therefore, our thoughts, emotions, soul and physical body are composed of our soul nature.

How does this idea appeal to you? Are you comfortable knowing whilst you were born whole and pure, through your beliefs, thoughts and experiences it leads to separation? I'm not suggesting it is entirely your fault because we are all bound to experience this. It is said, while our painful experiences are not our fault, healing the pain is our responsibility. Although there's an element of truth to it, we ought to remember there is nothing to heal other than to attend to our unconscious memories in order to return to wholeness. By attending to these aspects, we integrate our known sense of separateness. Release and Renew is a mantra I often repeat in my writing when I discuss healing and emotions. In doing so, we release that which is not conducive to the present moment. Similarly, we renew our commitment to nurture ourselves by connecting with our core emotions. The integration I speak of is an association with our soul nature, which at its essence is pure, whole and knows nothing of separateness or brokenness. It is the egoic mind which disconnects us from our spiritual self to create two identities ie the darkness and the light.

How To Heal Your Fragmented Parts

I am drawn to a passage by the South African author Michael Brown, who writes in The Presence Process : "I dropped my use of the word" heal "because of its connotation that something was wrong and had to be fixed. using the word "integrate," which to me meant there was a part of my experience that was unconscious- a part of my experience that I resisted, controlled, and sedated-which was asking to be incorporated into the whole.Whereas healing felt like I was excluding something from my experience, integration felt like I was embracing everything I experienced . " I believe Brown makes two important points here: we mustn't resist nor control the past, but perceive them as the whole of our life's experience. Second, integration means to embrace or at the very least acknowledge everything that happened to us. Perhaps not right away, but when we are ready to make peace with the past.

What are your thoughts about this? I realize you may have questions related to your personal experiences. Whilst I am not present to answer them, I assure you trying to make sense of them consciously is a healing process rather than an integration process. It is what author Dr. Mario Martinez means when he writes in The MindBody Code: How to Change the Beliefs that Limit Your Health, Longevity, and Success : "The true agents of change are elevated cognitions and exalted emotions. These agents of change provide sustain transformation; in fact, they have triumphed over the greatest infamies and darkest periods in our human journey. " It does little good to dwell on why the past took place as it did. Instead, we ought to turn the tables and consider the following questions as a basis for self-enquiry. Instead of trying to make sense of the past which keeps us trapped replaying painful memories, we identify how the experiences served us.
1. How can I use the past to facilitate my greater growth?
2. In what ways can I use my emotional wounds to bring peace and love to the part of me that is pure and whole?
3. How can I integrate my sense of separateness into the wholeness of my being?
4. Whom do I need to become and let go of to achieve this inner state?
Once we can perceive the pain of the past through the lens of: compassion, forgiveness, peace and love we heal our fragmented parts. It may involve deep exploration into ourselves with or without the guidance of a trained therapist. Considering this, I'd like you to spend the following week journaling your answers to the four questions above. Call it a remote coaching session if you like. Write what comes to mind even if it involves images or symbols. Similarly, pay attention to your dreams via the symbols that appear. Note how you feel within the dream and upon waking. Look for messages in your waking life in the form of people, places and situations that cause you unrest. This is your soul guiding you towards integration. Ultimately, to heal ourselves we must be willing to integrate the pain of the past, so healing happens naturally as nature intended it to.

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Source by Tony Fahkry

Views: 0
November 10, 2022
Words Can Help Heal – Sending a Pet Loss Card

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Anyone that has ever owned a pet knows that no matter how small an animal is, they each have their very own personality. Pets appreciate you. They look forward to seeing you daily. They make you feel wanted and needed. They can get you out of a funk. It is no wonder that we get attached to our pets.

Losing a pet is one of the hardest things that a pet owner will ever have to face. When someone loses a husband, a parent, or a child, we automatically think to send a card. We sometimes underestimate the importance of sending a pet loss card to a loved one. It is equally important to show you care by sending a heartfelt message. Simple words can mean so much to someone. It is comforting to a person who has lost a pet to know that their loved ones recognize their loss and respect their feelings of grief. The support of close friends and family during any loss can make the process a little easier to go through.

There are many way to express sympathy in a pet loss card. Here are some tips when writing words of comfort in a pet loss card:

1. Make sure to use your loved one’s pet name. Instead of saying “sorry about your dog”, say “sorry to hear about Max”.

2. If you have a specific story that your loved one ever talked about, mention it. It shows that you cared about the life of the animal and that not only were you listening, you were thoughtful enough to remember it.

3. Depending on your friend’s beliefs, mentioning the pet being in heaven can be comforting.

4. A lot of the time, pet owners feel some sort of guilt for having to euthanize a pet. It is important to let them know what good pet owners they were. Remind your loved one how awesome they were to their pet, and all the special little things they did to make their pet feel loved and special.

5. Offer your time. Mention that you are available any time to get a bite to eat, go out for coffee, or just listen. It helps not to be alone when you’re grieving. Although a lot of things probably aren’t exactly fun right away, doing things to keep your loved one’s mind off of the loss of her pet can help with the healing process.

No matter what you choose to say, make it personal. Remember that this pet played a huge role in your loved one’s life, and that your words mean more than you might know.

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Source by Lisa Falsetti

Views: 0

November 10, 2022
People Are Not Very Supportive Of My Marital Separation. They Aren’t Happy For Me If Things Improve

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I sometimes hear from people who are getting some hurtful feedback from those who are supposed to be “supporting” them during their marital separation. Sometimes, this so-called support comes from friends or family members. It can even come from the “support group” that you specifically joined in order to feel lifted up during your separation, which can be incredibly disappointing. Someone might say, “I did not really want to burden my family, friends, or coworkers with details about my separation. They know that I am separated, but I just don’t want to hear people’s personal opinions about my husband or my marriage. I am hoping to reconcile and so I don’t want to influence their opinions about my husband or about our relationship. However, I wanted a place to talk things through and to feel supported so I joined a support group for people going through a separation / divorce. The first week felt pretty good, but maybe that is because everyone was on their best behavior. I have to admit that the last few weeks, it really hasn’t gone well. I want to reconcile with my husband. I was looking for people who could identify with what I was going through to keep my spirits up while I was waiting to see what happened with my marriage. However, many of these people are getting ready to divorce and are quite bitter and angry. If I try to relay good news that happened between my husband and myself during the week, I sometimes get sarcastic comments. Someone might say ‘well, just wait. He’s just trying to be nice to you so that you’ll accept the divorce later.’ These type of comments are obviously not what I want to hear. I don’t mind expressing my fears, but I want people to try to talk me down or to help me look on the bright side. I don’t want people to tell me that the worst case scenario is going to happen or that all separations end in divorce. This is why I didn’t tell some friends and family, but now I am getting this with the support group. And yet, I know that I need support, so I am not sure what to do.”

I can really identify with what you are saying. I told some people about my own separation and I really came to regret it. Some of my friends became really angry with my husband and never really got over it – even after we reconciled. By then, I’d long forgiven my husband, and I just wanted to move on. But some people wouldn’t let it go. The thing is, with some people, if you tell them your most personal issues, then you’d better be ready to talk about those same issues every single time that you talk with them because they want to keep bringing it up and picking the scab. That is why you have to be really careful about who you confide in. Some people will project their own experiences and fears onto your experience and obviously, this doesn’t help you. Just because there are people in the support group who may be headed for divorce, this does not mean that you will be. At some point, I just had to tell people who weren’t supportive that I valued their friendship, but that I needed to talk about something else. Then I sought support elsewhere.

If you have not tried counseling, that is probably the very best option for support. They are trained professionals whose only job is to help you. They don’t know you outside of this and therefore are not going to let other things bleed into the reason for your being there. That is really the ideal scenario, but if you are resistant to counseling, then you have to pick your “trusted support person” carefully. If you truly feel that the support group isn’t going to improve, then you want to make sure that if you decide to end this support system, then you have already replaced it with a new and better one. Honestly, my ideal support person was not who I thought that it would be. It was someone from work who I did not know very well and perhaps that helped. She didn’t have all of the history with me that some of my other friends did. And she had separated and reconciled previously so she understood my thought process. Our interactions always left me feeling better, and not worse.

I often journaled my feelings on weekends because I knew that I needed to get them out and didn’t have access to my best support person. I came to decide that I’d rather journal to release my feelings than to have unsupportive people make me feel worse.

It’s important to remember that you can control who you allow to influence you. It’s possible to politely retreat when people aren’t understanding or supportive. It can be really important to surround yourself with positivity because it’s easy to get discouraged. And it’s very important to remember that people’s unsupportive reactions usually have more to do with their situation than with yours. They are projecting their own life and their own problems onto you, which just isn’t fair. If the support group isn’t providing the support that you need and is just making you feel worse, there’s nothing wrong with politely seeking support elsewhere. Because support is very important, but it can be tricky and difficult to find the right, objective person or group of people. At the same time, you don’t want to alienate family and friends, which is why it’s fine to just change the subject and ask to discuss something else.

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Source by Leslie Cane

Views: 0

November 10, 2022
Dealing With Customer Complaints – B.L.A.S.T

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In a restaurant, not so far away, in the not so distant future, a telephone rings, a customer complains… and the battle begins!

Handling customer complaints doesn’t have to always be a battle, with the right tools and responses you can use complaints to your advantage; to help you build your business. B.L.A.S.T is a great tool that is used by companies such as Yum! (Parent company of KFC, Taco Bell, Pizza Hut, A&W, and Long John Silvers). Training their employees in the basics of handling customer complaints. The acronym stands for:

Believe

Listen

Apologize

Satisfy

Thank

How does your company deal with customer complaints? The easiest way to find out is to pick up the phone and play the role of the complaining customer. What happened? If you were an irritated customer, would you return? Using the B.L.A.S.T guidelines, allows you to create a standardized method for dealing with your complainers and turning them into loyal customers.

Believe

This is the cornerstone of handling a customer complaint. Yes, the customer may be lying and be incorrect about their situation. It is important to understand that your customer believes that your establishment has wronged them.

Listen

Stop and listen to your customer’s complaint. I’m not certain whether it’s natural instinct or just plain stubbornness. As soon as a customer starts to complain, we start to think of how we will respond to the accusation before we are done listening, and too often the case, already have the response ready to fight back. Take a second, relax, and listen. On occasion a complaining customer will be rude, angry, and use vulgar language, stay the course and remain calm and level headed.

When the customer is done venting; in a calm, non-judgmental tone, repeat their problem. An example I used in my KFC for a mispacked order:

“What I hear you saying is that, you came in ordered and paid for 10 Pieces of chicken and when you got home, you only received 8, is that correct?”

By repeating the problem at hand, you’ve demonstrated your ability to the customer that you heard and understood their problem.

Listen and clarify. Never defend or justify. The customer doesn’t care if you were shorthanded or if you’re having a bad day, they only care that they get taken care of. No excuses, just solutions.

Apologize

Always apologize even if you did nothing wrong. From your customers’ perspective, they have a legitimate complaint, and they expect an apology. It could be as simple as “I’m sorry we’ve inconvenienced you.” or “I’m sorry I know how frustrating it is to buy dinner for my family, only not to have everything there when I get home” A sincere apology will usually diffuse a lot of frustration that the customer has. There is an exception to this rule though, if a customer calls with a critical complaint, such as food poisoning, don’t apologize, it may be construed as an acceptance of guilt, instead refer to your company’s procedures for such events.

Satisfy

Make it right. Ask the customer “What can I do to make this right for you”? Be the judge of what is fair of course, but allow them the opportunity to feel empowered over the situation. Many times they may ask for the problem be taken care of on their next visit or maybe that you talk to the person who made the mistake and correct them. We used a great system of sending out a personalized postcard apologizing for the mistake, it was a couple of handwritten sentences (yes, many times with spelling mistakes from my team members), but it was personal and always well received. We always gave them the unexpected as well, maybe a free dessert or an extra side dish just to show that we cared about them.

Thank

At the beginning, at the end, in the middle; it doesn’t matter, thank the customer for calling and complaining.

Why? With the simple act of complaining, your customer is telling you “I care about your business and your success”. They are giving you the opportunity to fix the problem and invite them back so they can give you more of their money. Puts a different spin on it doesn’t it? Thank them for giving you that second chance, for letting you know that something in your restaurant didn’t work like it normally does, for giving you the chance to make it right, and for the opportunity not to damage your reputation!

Reputation? I had to throw that one in. You work hard, day in day out, trying the best to make your business the best, and yet one unhappy customer can take it away from you. A happy customer will tell two or three friends about a good experience, but an unhappy customer will tell at least ten friends about their experience and it always multiplies through word of mouth. Case in point, when I moved cross country to my new hometown, I was at a Chamber of Commerce event and being the new person in the group, I introduced myself and what we did. No sooner than five minutes passed did I get a list of 10 restaurants in my area that in their opinion were in “need of my services”. Only one person gave me a good restaurant. I didn’t ask, I was told. To this day I still haven’t been to those restaurants as a customer, why do I want to give them my hard earned money, when they made my new friends unhappy? It may not be a rational thought, but it is human nature.

Will some people take advantage of your kindness? Of course, a rule of thumb I used in my restaurant was:

First time shame on me,

Second time shame on me, but I’m watching you,

Third time… Shame on you and I will make the decision on how I will deal with you as a customer.

Keep track of who calls to complain, names, phone numbers for follow up, addresses for your postcards. Using a binder and tracking your complaints, you will be able to detect and deter those that would take advantage of your new complaint procedures.

Adding B.L.A.S.T to your expanding toolbox of customer service tools will help you in dealing with customer complaints and turn them around so they can tell their friends what great service you have!

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Source by Albert Barneto

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November 10, 2022