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Overcoming Mindset Challenges

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We all have those days, we drop our heads and get down on ourselves; you might even let out a few expletive words for good measure. Our pickleball play is just not up to our, or the USAPA player rating standard. It’s frustrating. I’ll let you in on a secret I learned long ago from a coach who pushed us to achieve; your state of mind or your mindset, plays an enormous role in your successes and failure.

Carol Dweck, author of Mindset, identifies 2 types of mind-sets; fixed and growth. The fixed mindset has shaped you from birth, it is what you are and has defined your belief in your potential. An innate conviction fashioned from external influences and internally interpreted. A fixed mindset, sees obstacles when faced with change and challenges and therefore will interpret failure as self-defeating in the lack of abilities. It’s like looking on the other side of the court and thinking that the grass is greener – your opponents seem to have all the right moves and it’s your lack of something that is keeping you from winning.

On the other hand, the growth mindset is one that is embryonic. Here is where belief in ourselves can help us adapt and grow in the ways we want by developing our talents through hard-work and dedication. Learning to love our development playing pickleball and also developing a resilience to loss is the key.

Hear Those “Voices”

Learning to overcome a fixed mindset challenge begins with learning to control your emotions and then you can achieve optimal performance during competition. First, you need to pay attention to those negative voices; you know the one’s – from family members that expressed failure or the one’s from coaches that uttered a lack of talent. There may have even been laughter from classmates or club memberships. A mentor who would snap when you hit a setback. You may have developed a reactive “habit” – automatic response to an emotional stimuli. Pushing those old suppressed buttons will give you a release and an understanding but despite their best intentions, this can also trigger an emotional upheaval, easily sweeping you away. Fortunately there is one way to stop the spiral of uncontrollable emotional reactions – refocusing. Consciously stepping back to draw your focus into your senses and the physical effects they may manifest; elevated heart rate, sweaty palms, nausea, tight or tense muscles, anxiety, and shallow breathing.

Acknowledge and Accept

Staying in the present moment, acknowledging that these physical effects are poignant, so you can process the information as if you are a doctor observing a patient. Comprehend your emotional arousal as an imaginary threat, and your intensified state of mental stress or physical excitement is a normal response that can be reduced by controlling your emotions. Slow down. Accept that you can help your brain learn to process new “habits” to effectively stay grounded; stretch and breathe, visualize or focus on energizing cues that epitomize how you want to perform or transfer negative energy to positive energy.

Choice

You have a choice; interpret negative challenges or setbacks from a lack of talent fixed mindset or from a positive aptitude growth mindset. When you doubt your talent, change your focus – with time and effort, believe you can learn a particular skill or achieve a goal. If you hit a setback or face criticism, keep learning and persevere.

When the grass on the “other side” draws my attention, I stop and reframe – finding the courage in myself to think of the “water”, or successes that keeps my grass green. I still find myself under stress, and I still hear the “voice” of my fixed mindset. I have learned to face the criticism; sometimes old responses rear their ugly head and I get angry – hitting the ball without thinking and making unforced errors. Other times I am able to put those voices in their place. I interpret my challenges, and setbacks then regain my emotional control. It’s all very personal.

Over time, learning to take on the pickleball challenge wholeheartedly, gaining wisdom from setbacks, and acting on the criticisms you face by embracing the growth mindset can make it work for you.

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Source by Patricia H Kuhnen-Beaver

Views: 0

February 7, 2020
An Unusual Way to Get Rich – Create a Flea Market Small-Business Empire With Wholesale Products

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FACT: Many people earn $1,000 per day (that’s $104,000 per year) just selling at flea markets and swap meets on weekends. (I’ve actually made more than that on some days.) Most people think we are just a bunch of poor folks trying to make an extra dollar, and that’s exactly what we want them to think.

What do we know that you don’t? What are our secrets? Can you do it?

Yes. Anyone can sell at flea markets and become wealthy…and I’m going to tell you exactly how right here.

Becoming a flea market vendor is easy and affordable. Your expenses will be the cost of your merchandise and space rent. Daily rent for an outside space can be as little as $5-$10 per day. Many people begin by selling used items and move into selling brand new items purchased from wholesale companies. New items outsell used items two to one and have a higher profit ratio.

Most people already have a table or two they can bring with them. I actually began my flea market and swap meet business with only $200 and a couple card tables I borrowed. I now earn thousands of dollars every month without fail. (Of course, the more money you have to buy merchandise, the faster your new business will grow.)

The key is to let your new business grow. Don’t kill it by taking all the profits out of it! I suggest that you have a job or another source of income to cover your living expenses for at least the first six months after starting your new business.

There’s an old adage in this business: ‘The more you have, the more you’ll sell.’ Believe me, it is true! Take that to heart and put all of your profits into buying more merchandise, so you’ll have even more to sell the next weekend.

Who do you think most shoppers will go to, the guy sitting there with four items on a single card table or three spaces across the aisle from him literally loaded with millions of different items? If you think you have enough merchandise, you don’t.

If you use your profits to build your business and buy more merchandise every week it won’t be more than a few months before your sales rapidly increase and you can begin keeping some of the profits for yourself without killing it.

If you live in a northern climate that is cold in winter or a southern climate that is hot and humid during summer, you might consider renting a space inside a flea market building. Yes, your space rent will go up a bit, but you’ll have the advantage of heat and air conditioning (comfortable shoppers spend more money), as well as a secure enclosure for your tables and merchandise during the week when the market is closed.

Once your first small business is running well, use the profits from it to open a second small business at the same flea market or swap meet, selling a different type of merchandise. Expanding is as simple as renting another space and hiring someone to run it for you. Again, your costs will only be merchandise and space rent and whatever you pay your help. (Be good to them and they will be very good to you.) Just as with your first business, put the profits back into your second business and allow it to build.

The profits from two small businesses will allow you to open a third small business with ease. Do the same as you did before and allow your third business to grow. Put the money back into it by purchasing more merchandise.

Then open a fourth, a fifth, a sixth small business at the same flea market. It’s not only possible but almost guaranteed that if you will do that you will create your own small business empire in less than one year and have a yearly income in excess of $100,000 after expenses.

If you just put the profit back into your first new business, it will grow without another penny out of your pocket. The profits will allow you to open a second, a third and so on. You don’t need a small business loan to get started.

Plus, you are not limited to just one flea market or swap meet. There may be other markets within 20 or 30 miles of you, where you can do the very same thing and multiply your earnings.

If you follow this simple yet effective formula it won’t be long before you can stop selling at flea markets yourself and just become a manager, overseeing your small business empire and stepping in to give your employees breaks.

Once you are making a very good income, consider other ways to invest your money to make even more profit, such as opening your own wholesale house and selling merchandise to flea market vendors and make even more.

Flea markets and swap meets are an excellent venue in which the average person may start their own small business and become wealthy by creating a small business empire.

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Source by Allen Farlow

Views: 0

February 4, 2020
How Nootropics Make You A Better Entrepreneur

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Just imagine a pill you can take to enhance your points of view, increase your memory, and make you more productive. In it sounds like an ultimate life hack, you’re not the only one.

There are pills that guarantee that out there, yet how they work is a little complicated.

These pills are known as nootropics or smart drugs.

So what are nootropics?

Nootropics are a class of brain power enhancing supplements that are utilized to enhance focus and help to boost memory. Nootropics are regularly used to increase capacity to focus, help people concentrate more and reduce anxiety.

You will often observe Nootropics called as “smart drugs” as they are connected with increased intelligence, focus and motivation.

Be they are not at all like brilliant medications which can frequently bring about negative reactions or side effects with long term use. Nootropics are safe to use and pose a low risk of any side effects if used properly.

Numerous nootropics have similar systems of working by improving communication between neurons in your brain, adjusting neurotransmitter levels or by balancing brain cell health.

They also improve metabolism of your neurons, support neuroplasticity, or even support the development of new neurons and neurotransmitters.

How Nootropics work?

There are various sorts of Nootropic supplements accessible. Also, there are distinctive classifications and “families” of Nootropics, for example, Racetams and Ampakines.

Each of these particular supplements work in different ways and have different working mechanism. Given this, there is not one answer to the question “How Do Nootropics Work?” rather a wide range of answers.

There are however some basic ways in which nootropics work and modulate the neutrons in your brain. One of them is listed below

Together, the neurotransmitters and the receptors make up a “framework.” There are an immense huge number of these neuronal frameworks inside the mind.

What a Nootropic supplement does, generally, is to explicitly target and increase the proficiency of those frameworks which result in enhanced cognitive abilities.

How Nootropics will make you a better entrepreneur?

The initial step for an entrepreneur is to investigate what they are doing battling against. For some (myself included) it is to enhance focus and effectiveness during the working hours was my primary objective.

Diehard business people working 18-hour days require to last longer during the day and work normally when sleep deprived.

This is where nootropic role come into play. Below are the benefits of nootropics that will help you to become a better entrepreneur.

1. Increase concentration

Before you consider enhancing your memory capacities, you should first increase your concentration. Nootropics can help with that, particularly in case you can’t concentrate on a particular work over a longer period of time. This is a noteworthy issue with entrepreneurs who encounter inconvenience in concentrating for longer hours of work.

2. Enhances memory

It is easy to read and comprehend a specific topic but the vast majority discover it somewhat troublesome to recover data from their memory. Nootropics have appeared to have beneficial outcome on a man’s memory.

It enhances and repairs all parts of your memory capacities, including the working memory and recall. It additionally supports brain cell development and enhances the connections between the neurons. Aside from these advantages, they additionally repair the neuron, which thusly gives a help in comprehension of data information and recalling it.

3. Improves brain health

With busy schedule and poor diet, out brain takes a genuine bashing. Nootropics not only enhance your memory and information investigation but also improves the overall health of brain. They increases oxygen stream to the brain and maintains neurons and brain cells which keeps the brainwaves casual and more effective.

4. Better mood

The primary reason behind why many individuals can’t concentrate and focus at a specific task is foul mood. A few studies demonstrate that improper eating habits and sleeping habits can affect your mood. Nootropics can boost and stimulate mood enhancing neuroreceptors which makes your mood better and helps you to concentrate more.

Conclusion

Being an entrepreneur is not an easy job. You have to think outside the box that will make your business grow. Nootropics can help you to concentrate more and help you make your product awesome. If with a single nootropic you do not see significant results, you can combine different nootropics to see greater results. This is known as nootropic stacks.

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Source by Ritika Singh

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February 4, 2020
Created To Bond – Changes That Heal Part II
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Failure To Develop Relationships

Emotional ties have a dramatic effect on our well-being. When one fails to develop relationships or bond with others, it can and often does affect their ability to stave off or recover from a variety of not only physical but also emotional ills. When they learn to attach to and trust others, they begin to develop not only emotionally, but also psychologically. Thus, their ability to bond with others… to become closely knit, often carryover into their home life.

When a child is distressed, he/she may show unusual signs such as increased pulse, increased or labored respiration, helplessness, and hopelessness and may easily become enraged. These signs are often seen when the biological parent remarries and the child tends to believe that he/she must compete with the step-parent for the biological parent’s attention.

When the adoptive or step-parent enters the situation with food, physical contact, compassion and other help, the child learns her parents can meet her needs. The child is then more active and able to respond to stimulation such as playing. When the child is content, she is able to sleep and feel comfortable in her surroundings.

According to Deborah Gray, author of Attaching in Adoption, “attachment is a relationship formed primarily with members of the family and requires more time and interaction to be created. Attachment is what most adoptive parents are referring to when they talk about bonding with their child. Adopted children of all ages may have an attachment to their birth family, even if the relationship was neglectful or abusive. Many adoption experts agree that if a child can form an attachment to birth and foster parents, she will have the skills to attach to her adoptive family as well.”

Signs of Secure Attachment

The parental attachment process can often take weeks or years to fully develop, and in some cases there maybe pervasive attachment disorders for which professional therapy will be required. A strong indicator of whether attachment is taking place is the comfort with which the adoptive or step-parent is able to recognize the child’s needs. It is important to remember that the repetition of parents meeting a child’s needs is the foundation of forming a secure attachment with children of all ages, not just infants.

The attachment bond shapes an infant’s brain

The attachment bond is the term for our first interactive love relationship-the one we had with our primary caregivers, that is, our mothers. The mother-child attachment bond is instrumental in shaping infants brains. This important attachment profoundly influences our self-esteem, our expectations of others, and our ability to attract and maintain successful relationships. So, the success, or failure, of our first love-the attachment bond-has a life-long effect.

Our secure attachment bond shapes our abilities to:
- feel safe
- develop meaningful connections with others
- explore our world
- deal with stress
- balance emotions
- experience comfort and security
- make sense of our lives
- create positive memories and expectations of relationships
Attachment bonds are as unique as we are. Primary caretakers do not have to be perfect. They do not have to always be in agreement with their infants’ emotions, but it helps if they are emotionally available a majority of the time.

We were born with an innate or preprogrammed need to bond with one very significant person-our primary caregiver, usually our mother. Like all infants, you were a small bundle of disjointed emotions-intensely experiencing fear, anger, sadness, and joy, often at the same time. The natural emotional attachment that grew between you and your caregiver was the first interactive relationship of your life, and it depended upon nonverbal communication. Therefore, the bonding you experienced in this relationship determined how you would relate to other people throughout your life. This bonding relationship established the foundation for all verbal and nonverbal communication in your future relationships.

For better or worse, the attachment bond profoundly influences the infant brain. It is a baby’s first love relationship. When the primary caretaker can manage personal stress, calm the infant, communicate through emotion, share joy, and forgive easily, the young child’s nervous system becomes “securely attached.” The strong foundation of a secure attachment bond enables the child to be self-confident, trusting, hopeful, and comfortable in the face of conflict. As an adult, he or she will be flexible, creative, hopeful, and optimistic.

People who fail to establish this type of bonding relationship often experience confusing, frightening, or broken emotional communications during their infancy and often grow into adults who have difficulty understanding their own emotions and the feelings of others. This hampers their ability to establish, build and/or maintain attachments leading to successful relationships.

What is Attachment?

Attachment is the relationship between infants and their primary caregivers-is responsible for:
- shaping the success or failure of future intimate relationships
- the ability to maintain a normal emotional balance
- the ability to enjoy being ourselves and to find satisfaction in being with others
- the ability to successfully rebound from various disappointments, discouragement, and misfortune
Many scientific studies of the brain-and the primary role attachment plays in shaping it-has given us a new basis for understanding why vast numbers of people have great difficulty communicating with the most important individuals in their work and love lives. Once, we could only use guesswork to try and determine why important relationships never evolved, or developed chronic problems, or fell apart. Now, thanks to new insights into brain development, we can understand what it takes to help build and nurture productive and meaningful relationships at home and at work.

What is the attachment bond?

The mother-child bond is the primary force in infant development, according to the attachment bond theory pioneered by English psychiatrist John Bowlby and American psychologist Mary Ainsworth. The theory has gained strength through worldwide scientific studies and the use of brain imaging technology.

The attachment bond theory states that the relationship between infants and primary caretakers is responsible for:
- shaping all of our future relationships
- strengthening or damaging our abilities to focus, be conscious of our feelings, and calm ourselves
- the ability to bounce back from misfortune
Scientific research reveals the infant/adult interactions that result in a successful, secure attachment, where both people are aware of the other’s feelings and emotions is the necessary precursor for successful relationships. These studies also reveal troubled, or insecure attachment, in which the communication of feelings fails thus resulting in an inability to form the bind needed to establish a solid relationship. Researchers found that in order to have successful adult relationships there must exist in us and we must depend on the ability to:
- manage stress
- stay “tuned in” with emotions
- use communicative body language
- be playful in a mutually engaging manner
- be readily forgiving, relinquishing grudges
The same research also found that when an insecure attachment exists some type of abuse may have caused it, but it is just as likely to be caused by isolation or loneliness. These recent discoveries offer a new glimpse into successful love relationships. Taking these observations into account often provides the keys to identifying and repairing a love relationship that is strained or falling apart.

Insecure attachment affects adult relationships

Insecurity can be a significant problem in all of our lives, and it usually takes root when an infant’s attachment bond fails to provide the child with sufficient structure, recognition, understanding, safety, and mutual accord. These insecurities may lead us to:
- Tune out and turn off-Most often, if our parent is unavailable and self-absorbed, we may-as children-get lost in our own inner world, we become introverted, avoiding any close, emotional connections. This often causes us as adults to become physically and emotionally distant in relationships.
- Remain insecure-If we have parents who are inconsistent or intrusive, it’s more than likely that we will become unrealistically anxious and fearful, never knowing what to expect. Then as adults, we may become willingly available one moment and totally rejecting the next.
- Become disorganized, aggressive and angry-When our early needs for emotional closeness and comfort is neglected, or when a parent’s erratic behavior is a source of disorienting terror, emotional problems are sure to follow. As we grow into adults, we may lack the ability to love easily and may unknowingly be insensitive to the needs of our partner.
- Develop slowly-Problems often occur when we fail to develop as rapidly as we should, both emotionally and intellectually. Such developmental delays often manifest themselves in the form of deficits and often result in subsequent physical and mental health problems, and generally lead to social and learning disabilities.
Lessons Learned From Our Attachment Bond

There are many powerful, life-altering lessons we learn from our attachment bond-our first love relationship continues to teach us as adults. The gut-level knowledge we gained from this bond then guides us in improving our adult relationships and making them secure.

Lesson No. 1-All adult relationships depend on nonverbal forms of communication for their success. These nonverbal communication skills are learned in infancy. Newborn infants cannot talk, reason or plan; yet they are equipped to make sure their needs are met. Infants don’t know what they need, they feel what they need, and communicate accordingly. When an infant communicates with a caretaker who understands and meets their physical and emotional needs an attachment takes place and the strength of that attachment influences other relationships later in life.

Lesson No. 2-Relationships in which the parties are tuned in to each other’s emotions are called attuned relationships, and attuned relationships teach us that:
- nonverbal cues deeply impact our love relationships
- as we play it helps us smooth over the turbulent times we endure in love relationships
- inevitable conflicts can build trusting relationships if we approach them without fear or a need to punish or retaliate
When we can recognize knee-jerk memories, perceive expectations, inappropriate attitudes, unfounded assumptions and improper behaviors as problems resulting from insecure attachment bonds, we can squelch their influence and their effect on our adult relationships. That recognition allows us to readily reconstruct the healthy nonverbal communication skills that ultimately produce an attuned attachment and successful relationship.

Becoming an Adult and Relationship Orientation

As we grow into adulthood, for the most part we bring with us the ideas and communication lessons we have learned from the time of our infancy. Whether these are good or bad depends on our ability to not only view life from our perspective but also have the ability and the willingness to see things from the other person’s point of view as well. When we are able to do that, then we are in a more astute position to deal with situations and circumstances that are adverse to us.

As we move through the adolescent stage of life we find ourselves at odds not only with others but also with ourselves. We want to be an adult with all of its rights and privileges sooner that we can become one, yet at the same time we want to abdicate the responsibility that goes with that station in life. It is a time of being able to make your own decisions and taking authority over your own life, but you are not there yet. You must learn to maintain control of your impulsiveness and your inhibitions. You must be able to objectionably reevaluate your beliefs, see your parents and authority figures realistically, recognize and pursue your God-given talents and goals, and be willing to take ultimate responsibility for yourself. Finally you must be able to accept and appreciate people who are different.

This ability helps us to be able to accept the good and the bad because we are able to address situations in a mature manner. When we are able to do this, we place ourselves into a position of strength, resulting in a proper evaluation of ourselves. Thus we are able to overcome some of the most persistent problems we face daily because now we are not only able to see things in black and white but also in the various shades of gray. As such, we are able to make allowances for our and other peoples mistakes.

We at that point come to realize that everything in life doesn’t have to go our way in order for us to be happy. We gain a new perspective on ourselves, others and God as a result of our changed thinking. We are then able to deal with each other with mercy, in grace, with the understanding that we too make mistakes. When we move into the realm of tolerance and forgiveness, we are able to love others without them having to be perfect.

Yet, in order to accomplish the task and responsibility of growing up we must also be willing to take responsibility and be accountable for those things of which we have been put in charge. Those things include our attitude, tongue, and actions. As we continue to grow in stature and wisdom the maturity level of our life should also increase proportionately.

Differences Between Men And Women

From my experience in dealing with women, (my mother, aunts, seven sisters and many friends and associates) I find that the majority of women are generally oriented towards their existing friendship networks whereas men were more interested in meeting new people and finding people who had similar interests — in other words, men would rather enjoy the adventure of reaching out to new people rather than cementing their existing relationships.

These results contribute to the growing research on social capital, networking and highlight the importance of examining specific interactive applications. The importance of distinguishing between strong and weak ties plays a major role in establishing new relationships. Also, it is necessary to consider the importance of taking into account gender differences in social interaction patterns. Whereas, women increase their bonding social capital as a result of using these sites but men do not. Women, on the other hand, show a decrease in bonding social capital with those whom they meet outside of their normal sphere of influence.

The fear of incorporating emotional intimacy into these association/relationships is mainly due to a fear of rejection and engulfment – a fear of losing the other and/or losing yourself. To overcome this obstacle you must be able to establish an inner bond with yourself. Inner Bonding is a transformational process for healing the fear of intimacy related ideas that have been carried from past experiences.

The mental visualization of these experiences often cause us to digress into a self-contained state of emotional security that hinders our ability to openly tolerate the inconsistencies we see in others. As a result, we ourselves are moved to a protective state and therefore unable to deal with the negative feelings that we will invariably experience. This barrier can block us from resolving issues that in reality are non-issues.

The Immaturity In Adolescence

Struggles with adolescent identity and depression usually set in when an adolescent experiences a loss. The most important loss in their lives is the changing relationship between the adolescent and their parents. Adolescents may also experience strife in their relationships with friends. This may be due to the activities their friends take part in, such as smoking, which causes adolescents to feel as though participating in such activities themselves is likely essential to maintaining these friendships. Teen depression can be extremely intense at times because of physical and hormonal changes but emotional instability is part of adolescence. Their changing mind, body and relationships often present themselves as stressful and that change, they assume, is something to be feared.

Your experiences in life help you to mature. The maturity is developed when you know you have no one to blame for the past but the circumstances and your immaturity. Oftentimes your immaturity stopped you from having a proper perspective of the facts facts and seeing things as they were. This made you blame others for your sufferings. You may have created and escalated your suffering without realizing the facts and circumstances and taking a easy way out by holding others responsible for it.

You feel you are always on the receiving end of every wrong or perceived wrong due to your immaturity. However, life has a knack of replaying memories and after few years it recreates the same circumstances but this time puts you on the opposite side (giving end), you are left with no choice but to accept the fact that you were so immature then and have grow-up with years. As you mature, life makes you see your ‘old you’ in somebody else now in these replaying of circumstances and you know that the other person still has to wait years ahead to grow and realize these facts.

Maturity slowly leads to wisdom when you know that it is only you who has to stand up and take responsibility for your past – action / inaction, sufferings / failures instead of holding others responsible. It is truly said that you create your own happiness. By blaming others and holding grudges you keep happiness at bay and give way to hatred and self pity. However, with time and wisdom when you accept the responsibility for your sufferings and embrace all your successes without pride -you are truly happy.

Divorce And Its Affects On Maturity

Children of divorced parents often bitterly vow not to repeat the same mistakes. They want to avoid putting themselves and their own children through the pain that comes from the dissolution of a marriage. But, according to University of Utah researcher Nicholas H. Wolfinger, these children’s aspirations face unfavorable odds. “Growing up in a divorced family greatly increases the chances of ending one’s own marriage, a phenomenon called the divorce cycle or the intergenerational transmission of divorce.” Dr. Wolfinger has spent almost a decade studying the marriages of children from divorced homes in America. These children are more likely to marry during their teenage years, cohabitate and marry someone who is also a child of divorced parents. And they are also one-third less likely to marry if they are over age 20.

“Understanding the Divorce Cycle: The Children of Divorce in Their Own Marriages,” by Wolfinger, published by Cambridge University Press, contains important information for those interested in divorce and its repercussions. “Divorce is an important topic because it has so many consequences for well-being,” writes Wolfinger,

“Its transmission between generations adds a whole new dimension by perpetuating the cycle of divorce. The divorce cycle, in short, can be thought of as a cascade. Ending a marriage starts a cycle that threatens to affect increasing numbers of people over time, a sobering thought in an era when half of all new marriages fail.” His research also suggests that if one spouse comes from divorced parents, the couple may be up to twice as likely to divorce. Spouses who are both children of divorced parents are three times more likely to divorce as couples who both hail from intact families.

Besides observing the marital stability of the offspring of divorced couples, Wolfinger’s book provides another perspective on how parental divorce affects offspring marriage timing, mate selection, cohabitating relationships as well as historical trends in the divorce cycle. Wolfinger also explores the divorce reform movement in America and argues in favor of no-fault divorce laws, arguing that a return to an age of tough divorce laws would recreate the social conditions that used to make divorce harder on children.

It is my opinion considering all that has been written on this subject that one reason children from divorced families get divorced more often is because they have a tendency to marry as teenagers. Social history demonstrates that the older you are when you marry, the less likely you are to get divorced. It’s good advice for everyone.”

On the other hand, the more transitions children experience while growing up, the more they will experience as adults. Taking this into consideration, the question that needs to be asked is, “What is the hardest for kids is how many disruptions they experience — the up-and-down cycles.

This is a valid question because many children will have stepparents, and some will see their new families dissolve. This type of disruption occurs any time they lose a parent — except from death. That’s different, and doesn’t have the same negative effects on children… whereas divorce is ambiguous. Children wonder whether the divorce was their fault or who is to blame. And they wonder ‘Is he coming back?’” It is certainly good news that people are less likely to stay in high conflict marriages than they used to. However, “ending a low-conflict marriage may hurt children as much as staying in a high-conflict family,” and the odds of divorce transmission are actually highest if parents dissolve a marriage after little or no conflict. It therefore behooves us to evaluate the effects divorce will have upon our children and their emotional well being should we decide to travel that road.

But before making that decision, we should honestly examine ourselves and the motivating things that are moving us in that direction. This inventory, if prayerfully done will allow us to see the other persons point of view more clearly and thereby make the necessary adjustments, where warranted, to resolve the issues that precipitated situation to begin with. If we are truly willing to continue the relationship, then we must take the necessary steps needed to resolve the issues of what is good or bad by first considering what we could have done to alleviate the problem rather than casting blame. When we allow the power of forgiveness to flow in us we cannot only deal with the past and present, but also the future as bonds are cemented.

Gray, Deborah. Attaching in Adoption: Practical Tools for Today’s Parents. Indiana:Perspectives Press Inc., 2002.

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Source by Franklyn T. Johnson, Ph.D

Views: 0
February 3, 2020
Charity Auctions – Using a Cash Call

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Auctions are an excellent way to raise needed funds for worthy causes. They are also a valued social event for the people who enjoy attending them, whether they are directly involved with the cause or charity, or simply people from the community who like going to and participating in these events. Whatever the reason, you can bring a much more successful outcome to your live or silent auction through the use of a Cash Call, also called the Special Appeal, Fund-A-Need, Emotional Appeal, Bid for a Cause, or Bid for a Cure.

The Cash Call is part of the evening’s agenda, which is separate from the live or silent auction, but which is aiming to raise money for the same cause. It is a very common event that attendees will often expect. The way it works is that someone from the organization that is doing the fund raising will make an impassioned appeal to the audience members for direct donations. When done correctly, a Cash Call can in fact, bring in as much or more money than your live or silent auction.

Most professional auctioneers will be very familiar with the Cash Call, so they are an excellent resource to use to keep the energy levels up, and to keep referring back to this special appeal. While doing this, they can solicit further engagement from the audience members who may be actively bidding on items. Should an audience member not win an item, they may choose to donate the money they would’ve spent on it directly instead. Professional auctioneers are extremely adept at engaging the audience and keeping events moving along smoothly, and injecting fun, humor, and structure into your auction.

So the next time you’re raising money for a worthy cause, be sure to include a Cash Call in addition to your live and silent auction events, and watch the tally grow.

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Source by Kevin Rutter

Views: 0

February 2, 2020
Healing Grief & Loss – A Fresh Start

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Every Day Can Be A Fresh Start

“There are no constraints on the human mind, no walls around the human spirit, no barriers to our progress except those we ourselves erect.”

~ Ronald Reagan

7 DAILY FRESH START BULLET POINTS can help you heal your grief and loss. You have special unique empowerment to seize the moment again and again. Erect possibilities. Erect personal healing solutions. Erect your own peace. Erect hope. Every hour of every day can be a fresh start. Your condition may limit what you are able and desire to perform. However, constraints, walls or barriers don’t need to be in your mind. The opportunities for healing and progress toward a better you are abundant even if done in small baby steps; and on a few occasions one step forward and two steps back. There are keys to minimize the constraints in your mind. 7 must-consider steps to make every day a fresh start follow:

*Fresh Start #1 Erect Possibilities

“Seeds of great discoveries are constantly floating around us,

but they only take root in minds well prepared to receive them.”

~ Joseph Henry

Your grief loss happening may have sent you on a personal detour filled with discouragement and despair. On this detour confusion and hopelessness may jump in front of you on every turn of your healing journey. This is the essential time to explore all possibilities to reconcile your sorrow and grief. Undiscovered possibilities are available. Now is time to be open to receive all possible healing opportunities. Will you prepare to receive them? Search diligently for unrecognized or hidden possibilities.

*Fresh Start #2 Erect Personal Healing Solutions

Especially after a horrendous grief experience your life can be confusing and without meaning. It is essential to recognize you bring the meaning to every living moment. The meaning of your life is what you ascribe it to be. Being alive and proactive determines your healing solutions.

*Fresh Start #3 Erect Your Own Peace

You are absolutely correct. SOMETIMES LIFE IS TOUGH! In fact, life is not always fair. To be at peace because of grief circumstances can be extremely challenging. Finding your own personal peace can be enhanced by counting all the reasons why you can be grateful. Writing down a gratitude list can buoy up your spirit. No matter your condition after your grief there are blessings you can count. Counting your blessings can bring you peace.

*Fresh Start #4 Erect Hope

“When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems you cannot hold on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time the tide will turn.”

~ Harriet Beecher Stowe

Hope and peace go together. Nonetheless, without hope you cannot have personal peace. Hope is a powerful and vital quality to own and magnify. Consider all the ways you might create hope in your attitude and in your actions. Holding hope in a strong grasp every day will turn your tide to more happiness, hope and peace.

*Fresh Start #5 Erect Barrier Deletes

Learn to erase negative thinking. Erase hopelessness from your daily thinking. Everyone gets discouraged. Life grief experiences may be joined with partners of despair, confusion, uncertainty, and even anger. Were it that you could simple press a delete button and erase all things that are barriers to your happiness. Essential to your transformation from your grieving experience to a happier state of mind are behaviors that will eradicate negative thinking. It begins and ends with your attitude. Others can help but you are the one who must press the delete button over and over again until your mind is full of positive thinking. You can.

*Fresh Start #6 Erect Empowerment Discovery

I like to think of a tool box inside each of us. Perhaps a hammer, chisel, screwdriver, measuring tape, a pair of pliers, a small level, to mention a few. I dare say it has been a long time since you have used all of those tools – maybe never. However, the time may very well come when a simple use of a pair of pliers will be vital to you. Just like the foregoing tools mentioned are empowerment tools for your mind and attitude. Perhaps you have not needed them before. Maybe they were not needed until your grief loss experience. They might not have ever been used. You may need to dig deep within. If you do you will discover empowerment strength you were unaware you always had. Asking again and again, what can I do will help you discover your personal needed empowerment. Strength will begin to grow in your mind.

*Fresh Start #7 Erect A Daily Fresh Start

Even without a horrendous grief experience a fresh start can be invigorating and revitalizing. Erect each day with a fresh attitude of positive possibilities and opportunities. Seek for all healing solutions. Count your blessings. Delete all negative thinking. Search for your own empowerment. Begin each day with a positive attitude. Think about how you can gain more hope with a daily fresh healing attitude.

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Source by Duane Marchant

Views: 0

February 1, 2020
How To Start Marketing Your Business

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To new business owners, starting a business is often its own reward. They are thrilled to be able to be their own bosses, and to successfully get a business up and running. Often they are happy just to keep the dream alive.

But every business needs to grow. That doesn’t mean you have to reach out to a larger market – it means working toward increasing your share of the one you are targeting. This will keep your business healthy enough to survive obstacles such as tough economic times.

In order to keep moving forward, we need to market our businesses constantly. We need to dedicate a certain percentage of our resources to building our brand and reaching our target market. Here are some simple things you can do to help your business grow.

Have a clear picture of your target market.

Find out what types of people use the products and services you provide and respond to your business philosophies. If you’re not marketing to the right people, all will be lost.

Research, research, research.

Determine how to best reach your target market and what they expect out of your offerings. Study your competition carefully, and make note of what they’re doing right and wrong.

Choose your marketing channels wisely.

If your target market rarely reads, there’s no point in advertising in a magazine. Use what you’ve learned about them to find the best possible outlets for your message, and focus your marketing efforts there.

Give your advertising a chance.

Studies show that consumers require repeated exposure to a product before they will even consider buying. So don’t be surprised if one ad run doesn’t bring spectacular results. If you’ve done your homework and found a viable way to reach your market, run the ad at least two more times before you evaluate the results.

Take advantage of free publicity.

Sending out press releases and finding other ways to attract the media will give you high-quality exposure, and it won’t eat into your budget.

Keep track of the effectiveness of your marketing efforts.

If what you’re doing is working, you should be generating more revenue. Use some of that revenue to do more marketing. If it isn’t working, make adjustments and try again.

Sometimes you’ll have to take a step back with your marketing plans. But that’s not a sign you’ve failed. It’s a sign that you’re a smart marketer. Sometimes the market changes, and it’s up to us to monitor those changes and adjust our marketing plans accordingly. No successful company markets the same way forever. By evolving with our target market, we can make our marketing work better.

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Source by Jon Allo

Views: 0

January 30, 2020
Can Enzyme Therapy Heal Breast Cancer?

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That is a million dollar question, isn't it? I can speak from my personal and professional experience, and say that I have seen Enzyme Therapy play a very important role in healing Breast Cancer, and many other types of cancers. What are enzymes and why do they work?

Let's start by understanding cancer cells and what is called the Trophoblast Theory, discovered by Dr. John Beard in the early 1900's. Trophoblasts are specialized cells of the placenta that multiply rapidly, invade the wall of the uterus and create its own blood supply. Cancer cells function in the same way: they multiply rapidly, invade other tissues and create their own blood flow.

Trophoblasts produce the hormone HCG which is the basis for the widely used pregnancy test. Cancer cells also produce HCG, as confirmed by a study done in 1977 by Dr. Robert Williams. He reported the presence of HCG, 2 and 3 years before a cancer diagnosis. There have been other studies indicating that this "pregnancy hormone" is present with various forms of cancer. (Learn how to STOP cancer before it starts with sensitive blood cancer markers, such as this one in references)

The placental Trophoblast cells continue to multiply and grow until something very interesting happens. On day 56 after conception, the fetus begins to secrete pancreatic enzymes . This STOPS the replication of the Trophoblasts and the placenta no longer continues to grow.

But as adults, don't we secrete pancreatic enzymes, specifically protease enzymes like trypsin? We do, but not in sufficient quantities. Our pancreas is over worked because of excess sugar and carbohydrate consumption. Eating cooked and processed food also puts a strain on our pancreas.

Years of application by various doctors such as Dr. William Kelley, Dr. Kelly Raber and Dr. Gonzales have proven time and time again, that Enzyme Therapy is extremely beneficial for cancer patients.

All enzymes accelerate reactions, or even permit reactions that otherwise would not happen, while the enzymes themselves end up unchanged. Enzymes therefore are catalysts and can act over and over again doing the same thing. The protease group of enzymes (trypsin, chymotrypsin) are specifically directed to proteins. Amylase attacks carbohydrates while lipases attack fats.

Cancer cells act as enzyme-inhibitors by secreting a number of substances that reversibly inhibit the proteases manufactured by the pancreas in the body (this is one of the reasons that high levels of pancreatin are needed to defeat cancer). Glyco-proteins in the form of lactate (a precursor to lactic acid) are also released from the cancer cells that also act as enzyme-inhibitors. That is only 1 of many reasons why one may need large doses of Pancreatic Enzymes.

Secondly, the theory is that pancreatic enzymes attack the proteins on the cancer cell membrane, making them weaker and more vulnerable to the Immune System. The electrical charge of the cancer cells seems to "attract" these enzymes, while our healthy cells repel them.

Slowly but surely, Enzyme Therapy is gaining recognition in the scientific journals. A study conducted in Colonge, Germany in cancer patients suffering from Breast and Colo-rectal Cancers, documented promising result with enzymes. The therapy significantly decreased tumor-induced and therapy induced side effects and complaints. They found that the enzymes had the following properties:

Boost the Immune System
Anti-inflammatory
Anti-infectious
Anti-tumor
Anti-metastatic

Enzyme Therapy has worked with thousands of people and all types of cancers.

Unfortunately, this type of therapy will never gain FDA approval because you can't patent an enzyme and make billions of dollars. The cancer industry is a sickness-based industry that will never find a "cure". The cure is already here and it can be found in lifestyle changes, organic nutrition, ingestion of cancer killing herbs, detoxification and emotional healing, or as I have coined the term, The 7 Essentials.

To learn more about Enzyme Therapy, visit the Cancer X Products in my store. Email me directly if you have any questions. Always consult with a professional and experienced health care provider that is familiar with enzymes – don't guess when it comes to your health.

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Source by Veronique D Desaulniers

Views: 0

January 29, 2020
Why Not Have A Happy Marriage While Avoiding The Crash Of A Divorce?

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It is very important to find both present moment joy and pleasure about happy and successful married life and your future.

Happiness is of the keys to a successful marriage and is the fuel for a significant life, and without it we can not appear to get the life we want.

Ways to find happiness and to have a successful marriage is not always a simple solution, and yet you have to be conscious of it.

You must concentrate on the things that you have in order to find that you both have a happy married life.

Many folks prefer to dwell on the important things that they do not have and even pine over them.

When people can not find happiness in their own life they do not know the best ways to grow and discover into happy married life.

How to possess the keys to a successful marriage means the aspect that you already have actually found happiness in your own life.

In regular times, individuals understand exactly what they are blessed with.

Others, who just merely crave exactly whatever they see and want it severely and obsessively, are never pleased for their worldly belongings can not fill the empty void inside of them.

The best ways to discover happiness in a marriage starts with everybody finding happiness with God.

When mood swings are in the air and lift you up assisting you to forget concerns, God will help you through your state of mind.

Happiness is the normal state of grace for mankind.

Take a look at a little child taking its first steps with a proud smile and you will realize that state of grace I’m speaking of.

The little child does not want anything in return, it is genuinely pleased.

For the next few days hang around looking for your pure instants of joy.

Each instant in your life kept filled with enjoyment will help you to keep happiness and joy in your marriage.

Please count the moments of joy that you have felt. How to find happiness in a marriage is by your mindset.

Being truly happy is everything!

Previously I discussed free available information on saving the marriage today by staying happy in such an often conflicting world.

True happiness is a mindset of observing the excellence of grace within you constantly flowing your way.

We need to understand how to keep from sinking far too low while we journey through this world.

The trick to finding joy in our own lives and of our marital relationship is to get into the habit of searching for advantages, rather of griping all the time about whatever that has failed.

Pleasure offers us a sensation of power and energy.

Delight means being excited about now and about the future.

I always thought that to discover actually JOY in your life that you need to follow these simple fundamental guidelines.

You need to put your inner divine Self first in your life, something Jesus and so many other masters were here to teach us.

Jesus has channeled to us through the Course in Miracles that, “My holy brother, I would enter into all relationships, and step between you and your fantasies. Let my relationship to you be real to you, and let me bring reality to your perception of your brothers.”

Always put others upfront in your life, and have a caring attitude toward the world in general.

That has always been my mantra, so to speak, for a better more fulfilled happy life and a happy married life.

You must focus on the things that you have within you and learn to reflect that abundance and joy to the material world, in order to find happiness in your marital relationship, too.

Be sure to extend your inner bliss.

Remember, when you have no inner bliss being projected to your life in this world, you can not ever realize how to find happiness in a marriage.

How to discover happiness in a marriage stems from the element that you already have discovered joy in your own life.

On the other hand, a once happy married life for some folks turns into to an ugly matter of the divorce.

(Please also note, I suggest seeking out the web for more helpful material on things like, how coping with divorce may need to be addressed, and if so, learning to redirect the mental power of our errors into positive results.)

To success in love and life!

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Source by James Nussbaumer

Views: 0

January 29, 2020
How to Transition to a Bodybuilding Lifestyle

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Many of us spend time looking in the mirror, wishing for this or that, but the bottom line is that we as humans strive for improvement. Think about how great it feels to accomplish something big and see yourself rewarded for it. Looking at the mirror thinking about how you can improve your physique can be related. Improving your physique is a lot like improving other areas of your life. You’ll feel very accomplished when seeing results, and in turn, motivating yourself to strive to get better. Many of us want the end result, but in order to get that end results, you have to work for it. You won’t get a bachelor’s, or masters, or PhD by wishing you had one. These are all separate goals or achievements in the education process, just like you may have certain steps or goals for your physique accomplishment. The big problem here is transitioning into a healthy lifestyle or a bodybuilding lifestyle. This article will provide you with a step-by-step process on how you can transition from your current lifestyle, into a bodybuilding lifestyle or at least a lifestyle revolved around fitness and improving your physique.

Step 1: Desire the change

The first thing you need to do is to WANT the change in lifestyle. If you aren’t committed towards this lifestyle then it will eat you up. You have to want this. Some people are in unfortunate situations where they NEED it. Let’s hope you aren’t at that point because if you need it, but don’t want the change, that can be a serious problem. If you are serious about the lifestyle and desire the change, then you’ll be a lot more motivated. Motivation is key because increased drive can spell more desired results!

Step 2: Seek Support

No matter how much you think you know, there is always more to be learned. Bodybuilders at all stages of the game still always seek support from other people and it’s this support that can really help their physique grow. Thinking you know everything can lead you down the wrong path. Despite my experience as a bodybuilder, I’m always looking for more information or taking advice from competitors and coaches. Information can be a key to success.

Step 3: Be consistent

We want results that will last, not temporary results. Being consistent will help you establish results that will stick with you for the rest of your life. Continuing to pursue bodybuilding or a healthy lifestyle will give you just that, a healthy lifestyle. One of the biggest ways to achieve your best physique possible is by constantly putting in the work day in and day out.

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Source by Michael Caputo

Views: 0

January 29, 2020