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Tag: Grieving

  • Healing Grief & Loss – A Fresh Start

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    Every Day Can Be A Fresh Start

    “There are no constraints on the human mind, no walls around the human spirit, no barriers to our progress except those we ourselves erect.”

    ~ Ronald Reagan

    7 DAILY FRESH START BULLET POINTS can help you heal your grief and loss. You have special unique empowerment to seize the moment again and again. Erect possibilities. Erect personal healing solutions. Erect your own peace. Erect hope. Every hour of every day can be a fresh start. Your condition may limit what you are able and desire to perform. However, constraints, walls or barriers don’t need to be in your mind. The opportunities for healing and progress toward a better you are abundant even if done in small baby steps; and on a few occasions one step forward and two steps back. There are keys to minimize the constraints in your mind. 7 must-consider steps to make every day a fresh start follow:

    *Fresh Start #1 Erect Possibilities

    “Seeds of great discoveries are constantly floating around us,

    but they only take root in minds well prepared to receive them.”

    ~ Joseph Henry

    Your grief loss happening may have sent you on a personal detour filled with discouragement and despair. On this detour confusion and hopelessness may jump in front of you on every turn of your healing journey. This is the essential time to explore all possibilities to reconcile your sorrow and grief. Undiscovered possibilities are available. Now is time to be open to receive all possible healing opportunities. Will you prepare to receive them? Search diligently for unrecognized or hidden possibilities.

    *Fresh Start #2 Erect Personal Healing Solutions

    Especially after a horrendous grief experience your life can be confusing and without meaning. It is essential to recognize you bring the meaning to every living moment. The meaning of your life is what you ascribe it to be. Being alive and proactive determines your healing solutions.

    *Fresh Start #3 Erect Your Own Peace

    You are absolutely correct. SOMETIMES LIFE IS TOUGH! In fact, life is not always fair. To be at peace because of grief circumstances can be extremely challenging. Finding your own personal peace can be enhanced by counting all the reasons why you can be grateful. Writing down a gratitude list can buoy up your spirit. No matter your condition after your grief there are blessings you can count. Counting your blessings can bring you peace.

    *Fresh Start #4 Erect Hope

    “When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems you cannot hold on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time the tide will turn.”

    ~ Harriet Beecher Stowe

    Hope and peace go together. Nonetheless, without hope you cannot have personal peace. Hope is a powerful and vital quality to own and magnify. Consider all the ways you might create hope in your attitude and in your actions. Holding hope in a strong grasp every day will turn your tide to more happiness, hope and peace.

    *Fresh Start #5 Erect Barrier Deletes

    Learn to erase negative thinking. Erase hopelessness from your daily thinking. Everyone gets discouraged. Life grief experiences may be joined with partners of despair, confusion, uncertainty, and even anger. Were it that you could simple press a delete button and erase all things that are barriers to your happiness. Essential to your transformation from your grieving experience to a happier state of mind are behaviors that will eradicate negative thinking. It begins and ends with your attitude. Others can help but you are the one who must press the delete button over and over again until your mind is full of positive thinking. You can.

    *Fresh Start #6 Erect Empowerment Discovery

    I like to think of a tool box inside each of us. Perhaps a hammer, chisel, screwdriver, measuring tape, a pair of pliers, a small level, to mention a few. I dare say it has been a long time since you have used all of those tools – maybe never. However, the time may very well come when a simple use of a pair of pliers will be vital to you. Just like the foregoing tools mentioned are empowerment tools for your mind and attitude. Perhaps you have not needed them before. Maybe they were not needed until your grief loss experience. They might not have ever been used. You may need to dig deep within. If you do you will discover empowerment strength you were unaware you always had. Asking again and again, what can I do will help you discover your personal needed empowerment. Strength will begin to grow in your mind.

    *Fresh Start #7 Erect A Daily Fresh Start

    Even without a horrendous grief experience a fresh start can be invigorating and revitalizing. Erect each day with a fresh attitude of positive possibilities and opportunities. Seek for all healing solutions. Count your blessings. Delete all negative thinking. Search for your own empowerment. Begin each day with a positive attitude. Think about how you can gain more hope with a daily fresh healing attitude.

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    Source by Duane Marchant

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  • How Dirty Bunks At Summer Camp Can Teach You How To Heal

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    When I was a child and a young adult, I spent twenty summers at Camp Ramah, a network of Hebrew-speaking summer camps located throughout North and South America, Israel, Russia and even Eastern Europe. I was a camper, counselor, teacher, division head, Camp Rabbi and assistant camp director at Ramah in the Poconos and Ramah Massachusetts. Aside from having a wonderful time learning all about what it meant to be a “good Jewish boy,” I now realize that it was at Camp Ramah that I learned a valuable life-lesson which would teach me-and you– how to heal from the pain of loss.

    Surprisingly enough, I learned that lesson from our dirty bunks!

    Every single day, our bunk needed to be cleaned, except for Shabbat, our Sabbath. Chores were divvied up, sometimes using a daily “job Wheel of Fortune,” sometime a weekly cleaning assignment, and sometimes the counselor simply told us what to do. No one liked to clean the bunk, but from bunk clean-up, I learned my first, and perhaps most important healing lesson: mourners need to clean out the losses from their lives, to make room for the life of joy and celebration that is waiting to enter. It wasn’t about the clean-up at all, it was about having something to do each day that would help us reach our goal. We were never allowed not to have a job, that was not an option. Each day we had to actually do something, we couldn’t just sit on our beds and read comic books, and we couldn’t just lie in bed all day!

    Now I am a man, and I do not see dirt, whether it was in my bunk at camp or in my home now. But somewhere in the recesses of my mind, I knew then, and know now, that there was indeed dirt which we needed to clean up and remove. Though I mostly didn’t want to clean, I knew it was necessary.

    You could say that when loss enters our lives, our life-bunks become covered with dirt. The dirt won’t go away by itself, it needs to be swept out. That’s why routine tasks are crucial-they help us get out of bed every morning and tend to the chore of cleaning our bunks. Or our lives..

    If you’re like me, you would sometimes rather not do anything to heal, perhaps just wait until “the right time comes along.” It’s too hard, or it hurts too much, or I don’t like making changes so I’ll just stay the way I am right now-as if you could…

    I know people, and so do you, who are still grieving a loss from ten, twenty or even thirty years ago. I know some one whose husband died ten years ago, and to this day has still not emptied out his clothes closet. When I asked her why not, her answer was: I like to feel that he’s still here with me. Okay, I get that, but for her, he is still alive while she is drowning in sadness, and that is not how life is supposed to be. If she cannot clear out his clothes, then she cannot ever begin to heal, because for her, he hasn’t truly died, and she has not yet said goodbye to him. It’s easier, she thinks, to do nothing. Except we know the truth. Doing nothing is worse than just doing nothing. Doing nothing only makes it harder and harder to begin to sweep out that dirt and let the beauty of life enter into our lives.

    So at camp, the dirt needs to be cleaned up and swept out, or else the bunk will get even dirtier. The lesson is clear. When loss comes, we need to similarly begin to clean up, do what needs to be done, and let the healing begin.

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    Source by Dr. Mel Glazer

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  • Can Animals Get PTSD? Yes! Animal Communication and Energy Healing Can Help

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    Today, many rescued animals experience PTSD. They need help to heal before they can integrate into your family. Animal Communication and Energy Healing are two powerful tools to assist them.

    Why do so many animals experience trauma today?

    Many of the reasons are similar to those experiences that can cause PTSD in humans.

    ~~ Too early separation from the mother dog, cat, or horse, for whatever reason.

    ~~ Separation from their human family due to hurricanes, storms, flooding, fires, earthquakes, and other weather or earth-changing event in which people and their animals can become separated.

    ~~ Being shuffled from one rescue place to another in the genuinely loving effort to find the rescued animal a new home.

    ~~ Traumatic loss because the family is no longer able to keep the animal due to financial and/or health changes.

    ~~ When animals are dropped off at shelters or abandoned without explanation, they are confused, scared, hurt, angry, grieving, and afraid – just to name a few emotions that come up for them.

    ~~ When the shelter is one that kills animals after so many days, the animals know they might be killed, and the spirits of other animals killed there may be lingering, making the situation even more uncomfortable.

    This is not a complete list, but this list illustrates that one or more of these experiences may make integrating into a new loving family a challenge for the animal you’ve so lovingly adopted.

    The good news is that animals can recover from PTSD.

    When you adopt an animal from a rescue facility, you may not realize immediately that the animal is having difficulty adjusting.

    I’ve had clients ask for my assistance after struggling for a year or more to connect with a cat or dog or horse who has experienced a traumatic event.

    These clients are good, kind, loving, nurturing people who have tried everything they can think of to help their new animal companion adjust. Often they have been pouring love to an animal who is not open to receiving it.

    Of course, the sooner you ask for assistance, the sooner you and the animal will begin to build trust and open a loving connection between you.

    When an animal is emotionally shut down, afraid of experiencing yet another loss, and/or distrustful that this will be their “forever” home, something else must be added to the equation to assist them.

    Whatever history you have about the animal is also a very important piece of the puzzle.

    Using my Animal Communication and energy healing skills, I can offer you and your new companion special assistance.

    Over several sessions, I am able to establish a rapport with an animal who is very shut down.

    It can actually help me connect with them because I’m not physically present.

    Working from a distance, I can easily make a telepathic connection, which some animals experience as less intrusive than a human stranger being physically in the animal’s space.

    Furthermore, telepathically and energetically…

    ~~ I can feel what the animal is feeling because I’m a strong emotional empath.

    ~~ I can feel if the animal has a huge wall around themselves, or just needs some additional reassurance.

    ~~ I can feel if the animal is distrustful and can suggest ways of building trust.

    ~~ I can often feel if the animal is hiding something or lying to me and/or to themselves.

    ~~ I can ask other animals in your family for any insights they want to share, assuming they have already met the new family member. These often prove to be of immense value in understanding what’s going on with an animal who is too closed down to share very much.

    ~~ I can scan the animal energetically, with the animal’s permission, to pick up energy patterns in their auric field, chakras, and physical body.

    Once we have a better understanding of what’s going on for that animal, we together develop a plan of action.

    ~~ Sometimes Flower Essences are a good way to start. I am able to suggest appropriate essences to assist you and your animal companion(s).

    ~~ As a Certified Practitioner of The Emotion Code™, developed by Dr. Bradley Nelson, I know what a valuable tool this is for assisting an animal with PTSD. (This system has also been shown to be effective with humans.) Releasing emotional blocks and reducing or eliminating walls around their hearts will bring about huge healing shifts.

    ~~ As a Certified Multidimensional Healer, I work with healing teams from Source to remove the energy patterns of trauma, repair chakras and other damaged areas, assist the animal’s bodies to rebalance, and bring the animal into a space of harmony, peace, and openness to their new life circumstances.

    ~~ I may also refer you to other practitioners who offer many other alternative services that will assist the animal, such as acupuncture, chiropractic, Theta Healing, and basic training for dogs and horses.

    Having a “plan of action” helps you and the animal know what next steps to take and have a sense that there truly is hope of healing the animal and the entire situation.

    Have you recently brought home a new animal or are planning to adopt from a rescue place?

    If so, keep in mind that while coming to your home is the best thing for this animal, in some cases you many need to take some extra steps to help the animal integrate and become part of your loving family.

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    Source by Nedda Wittels

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  • Why You Need to Express Emotion

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    When I was young I was taught that crying was not good. After all, the message was that if you cry too much, “you’re going to get sick.” Crying, especially in public, definitely was bad news. In short, crying, even when grieving, was considered to be a sign of weakness. If you were going to cry, then do so in private.

    Through the years this and many other natural ways of showing emotion have been stifled by many of the celebrities who always assume a stoic pose when appearing on camera. (I always remember the death of President Kennedy and the way Jackie showed little emotion during the funeral and on TV.)

    Many additional beliefs about expressing emotion were looked down upon for years as western culture had adopted the “rugged individualism” view of dealing with life in all its manifestations. Expressing emotion was out and being strong was definitely in. Keeping emotion within is presently the cultural norm.

    However, psychology and the social sciences have shown time and time again the importance of expressing, in some form, what is happening inside; it can actually save your life. If you have been trained by the authority figures in your life to suppress your feelings or if you are unable to cry (much to do with unconscious beliefs instilled early in life) when one might be expected to do so, consider the following.

    1. We are built to vocalize feelings and tell our stories. This is an inherent and normal human response. Its purpose is to relieve the stress of trauma and massive change that occur in every life. There is a basic human need to externalize the pressure and pain that develops within.

    2. What is the alternative when we bottle the anxiety, anger, fear, guilt or pain that is generated by a major loss? The physical self pays a huge price to perform this task. Stress hormones go into overdrive and every cell in the body is affected. I repeat, every cell in the body is heavily stressed. Energy stores are depleted.

    3. A more vicious result of stuffing feelings is that our unconscious and our memory banks keep them forever alive in full force. Consequently, we are easily thrown into deep pain throughout life when something we see in a movie or on a TV show or read in the paper, cues up the terrible feelings and memories we never dealt with.

    So what can you do? The obvious answer is to find a way to tell your story of pain and disappointment. If you don’t have a best friend who is a good long-term listener, (a resource we all need to develop), then seek out a counselor, clergy person, or support group. You also can express feelings through writing, drawing, painting or sculpting. Reach out to God to unload your burden. You may need several avenues of release.

    Give in to the natural inclination to share the pain of loss. There is nothing weak about doing so. It is not merely highly therapeutic, it will lead to insights into your loss and how to cope with it (verbalizing our feelings often leads to new interpretations and thoughts). When appropriate, request your good listener to give you valuable feedback.

    Make every effort to change the pattern of the way you deal with loss and change and encourage your children to be open with you about their feelings. See the process as wisdom seeking and in making wise choices. Let periodic expression, where you plumb the deepest depths of your feelings, become part of your long-term healing process. We all need the nurturance and feeling of community that sharing feelings naturally brings forth.

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    Source by Lou LaGrand

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  • 13 Healing Bullet Points

    13 Healing Bullet Points

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    Your life is not defined by the trials you encounter; it is determined by how you respond to personal challenges.

    “I am the source for the perspectives I choose to hold… regardless of how aware I am of why or how I come to possess that particular perspective. It takes courage to look into the mirror of our souls, absent excuses. I will look into that mirror little bits at a time. SEE and ACT. SEE what I can bear to see and ACT upon what I am able. This is the heart of a gentle invitation to personal responsibility.” ~ Mary Anne Radmacher

    Consider the following 13 bullet points and promises:

    • 1. Understanding how to heal your grief is your first essential step. THE PROMISE: A more clear understanding of your grief is possible as you stop grieving and start healing.

    • 2. Creating decisive thinking, attitude and skill are must-have qualities to master happiness. THE PROMISE: You can develop psychological and emotional empowerment by practicing specific and consistent actions.

    • 3. Don’t be stuck in a negative outlook; as a cure learn how to use grateful moments. THE PROMISE: By expressing your gratitude for uplifting and positive emotional experiences you can find the inner empowerment to start healing and begin new hope.

    • 4. Rescue yourself from floundering in your painful past. THE PROMISE: Concentrating on your new you and new conditions can begin your life anew.

    • 5. Take control of your personal thoughts and actions THE PROMISE. You have far more ability to determine what you think and how you act than you initially imagine.

    • 6. Wanting to heal is not enough; persuasive desires can give you vital healing clarity. THE PROMISE: As you hunger and thirst to overcome your grief and loss a clearer path will appear.

    • 7. Desiring your old life back is counterproductive; embracing your new circumstance will give you empowerment. THE PROMISE: New opportunities and possibilities are within your reach as you seek them.

    • 8. Everyone’s grief clock keeps its own time; your grief healing clock is correct – follow that time. THE PROMISE: Be kind to the grief you feel; allowing a short period of time for your sorrow is OK which will bring you clarity and resolve.

    • 9. You can’t hibernate expecting to awaken in the spring with your sorrow healed – action steps bring reconciliation. THE PROMISE: Happiness and hope are the result of your actions.

    • 10. Because of your horrendous condition you can feel uncertainty; yet, finding joy again is possible. THE PROMISE: You may experience hopelessness, indecision, impossibilities, even anger; nonetheless, finding new joy is reachable.

    • 11. You are not alone, thousands of others have suffered through their grief and found joy – you can also. THE PROMISE: You can find personal strength in the many examples of reconciling grief and finding joy again.

    • 12. Reinforce your capacity to direct your own attention toward your goal. THE PROMISE: You can guide yourself more effectively toward healing your grief and loss.

    • 13. Re-evaluate your outlook; consider all shifts that have occurred from your grief happening. THE PROMISE: As you reconnect with your passions, people, places or things you did previous and embrace the hope of greater understanding, peace and joy – clearness and hope will come.

    “Greatness is not in where we stand, but in what direction we are moving. We must sail sometimes with the wind and sometimes against it – but sail we must, and not drift, nor lie at anchor.” ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

    Finding healing, harmony and happiness after grief involves a specific conditioning of the mind and heart. A steady fulfillment of contentment, confidence and hope are needed and essential. The 13 foregoing important bullet points and promises will support you in understanding, reconciling, and healing your grief and loss; they will give you inner empowerment needed to weather your personal life storms.

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    Source by Duane Marchant

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  • Four Essential Solutions To Heal From Your Profound Sorrow – Stop Grieving And Start Healing

    Four Essential Solutions To Heal From Your Profound Sorrow – Stop Grieving And Start Healing

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    Grieving And Start Healing

    1- Optimism!

    "The first step towards the solution of any problem is optimism." ~ John Baines

    Begin by thinking and believing you can take one step toward hope and peace no matter how overwhelmingly complex it may appear. Keep your candle of hope lighted even though your circumstance may seem fogged with blackness.
    "It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness."
    ~ Chinese proverb often quoted by Eleanor Roosevelt

    The darkness of your cave of sorrow clouds and grief shadows can seem overpowering. Yet, unknown, unexplored possibilities can be discovered, explored and applied in your healing. Opportunities and potentialities of hope can be illuminated by your small candle light of anticipation and optimism. Even in the darkest of conditions happiness can be found. You must remember to turn on your light of hope.

    "It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light."
    – Aristotle Onassis

    Optimism can help you focus on undiscovered possibilities. Focusing on opportunities not yet considered with hopefulness and confidence is vital to stop grieving and start healing. Optimism is your first important solution to overcoming your sorrow.

    2- There are Answers

    "Be thankful that life is a mystery. There is so much we can never know. Breathe deeply and relax into the not-knowing. There is much that we do not have to know in order to live joyfully."
    ~ Jonathan Lockwood Huie

    Seeking all the answers to heal from your deep grief experience may not be in your best interest. Every answer to the "Why", "How", "When", and "Where" is not necessary to live joyfully. Concentrating on the things you can be grateful for may be a better solution. Focused on counting your blessings one by one can give you greater hope and resolve.

    "Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties."
    ~ Helen Keller

    Optimism in your thinking, resolve to overcome life's detours, determination to not let a daunting grief challenges stop you on your journey to find more happiness are all essential elements of personal empowerment. Don't let the tears from your crying about the sun being gone from your life block you from seeing the potential stars of happiness and hope.

    "Only when life is difficult, are we challenged to become our greatest selves."
    ~ Jonathan Lockwood Huie

    Let's be honest and frank, grief happenings are difficult and trying. But new possibilities discovered can help you become your greatest self. Follow your heart and don't let anything crush your dreams.

    "When It's Darkest, Men See the Stars."
    ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

    Empowerment to heal from your grief and loss requires you look beyond the darkness you see and feel. Looking for the stars of hope beyond your darkest night may require an attitude shift. Look beyond your shadowy discouragement. You can if you will.

    3- Resolve

    "Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties."
    ~ Helen Keller

    Don't let the tears from your crying about the sun being gone from your life block you from seeing the potential stars of happiness and hope.

    "Only when life is difficult, are we challenged to become our greatest selves."
    ~ Jonathan Lockwood Huie

    Let's be honest and frank, grief happenings are difficult and trying. But as you search for solutions the possibilities discovered can help you become your greatest self. Follow your heart and don't let anything crush your dreams.

    4- Pray

    After you have considered and done all you can never forget the inspiration and strength that can result from communion with God.

    "Our prayers should be for blessings in general, for God knows best what is good for us."
    ~ Socrates

    It is good to remember as you pray that God gives you what you need in His good time – but not always when and what you ask for. I have lived with and overcome grief supported each time from inspiration, strength and personal empowerment from communion with my God. You can also.

    Be Optimistic. There are answers. Seek them. Have determination and resolve. Pray. Seek the inspiration of communion with God.

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    Source by Duane Marchant

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