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Tag: Feel

  • Giving a Great "Walk Around" Sales Presentation

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    Salespeople should know that a walk around isn’t just a presentation, it is a chance to discover the customer’s needs and turn your product or services features into a benefit for that customer.

    Learning good selling techniques takes practice and learning how to give a “walk around” sales presentation is essential to the sales process.

    An excellent walk around presentation is not a canned presentation. It has been said, “A good walk around presentation doesn’t work because it’s canned; it got canned because it works.” That’s what a walk around should be – not canned, but planned. Salespeople need to know where they are going all the time. Hopefully they can help guide the customer down the Road to the Sale.

    Before we can attempt a presentation we must understand what a “feature” is and what a “benefit” is. A feature is what something is – a benefit is what something does. Let’s use automobile sales as an example. So let’s look at some car sales techniques. A “walk around” occurs when a salesperson pulls a vehicle out of the line of cars in front of the dealership. The salesperson opens the doors, the trunk, and the hood. They turn on the car and get the A/C running in the summertime (or the heater in the winter time). They take the customer and tell them about the vehicle as they walk around it.

    The aerodynamic styling of a vehicle is a feature; great gas mileage and a quiet ride are the resulting benefits. A lot of salespeople are good at reciting features, but not at explaining why the customer needs them – and this is for two reasons. One is they don’t know enough about the car and the other is they did a poor job qualifying the customer’s needs. Ask questions of your customer. Ask what they want from their next vehicle and listen to what is said.

    How can a salesperson enthusiastically talk about the double steel cargo box if they don’t know what the customer is going to use the vehicle for? They can’t.

    In a typical selling situation a salesperson might say something like, “Yes sir, this car has everything you’re looking for: a fuel efficient engine and a hands-free Bluetooth communications system. It also has ABS brakes, limited slip rear axle, and terrain management.” Sounds all well and good, right? Wrong. There is nothing your salesperson has told this customer that 1,500 other salespeople and brochures and Internet research haven’t already told him.

    So the customer looks at the salesperson like a deer in the headlights. He doesn’t know what he is what he is supposed to say, except what he is probably thinking, “I can see all of these options, Mr. Salesperson. Tell me something I don’t know.” You see, when the salesperson recites his or her cornucopia of knowledge, it isn’t a question so it doesn’t really move the sale forward. He is just repeating what the customer told him he wanted.

    The customer’s only response is, “Yes, Mr. Salesperson, I can see it has everything I asked for. How much is it?” Or worse yet, the customer may say nothing. The worst thing that can enter a walk around presentation is silence. When there is silence, there is pressure and in the selling process, we want no pressure. As I mentioned many times, the only common ground a customer has is the price. When you stop talking, the only thing they can say is how much… or goodbye.

    To do an excellent walk around, salespeople need to remember the thing the customer wants to know more than anything, “What will it do for me?” Until you tell customer that answer, then he is probably isn’t listening.

    Back to the walk around – how long did it take me to recite the options above, 30 seconds? What do I do now? I am out of things to say. Obviously there are lots of options and I could probably go on for a while, but even if I could memorize them all on every model, the customer will be yawning. Why? Because he wants to know what it will do for him. If salespeople are just going to recite options, they would be better off to hand the customer a brochure and send him on his way. The brochure is better than a salesperson will ever be at features. They break down the passenger compartment to cubic inches for heaven’s sake! When it comes right down to it, does the customer even care that there is 28 inches of legroom? No. But he will be interested to know that, “Because of the transverse mounted engine, Mr. Customer, when you and your family take that trip to Colorado this summer you can really stretch out your legs!” That is how you sell legroom. Note: Without asking good questions, how could you make the above statement? But here’s the good news: you can make that statement even more powerful in two ways – by moving the sale forward and by asking for the order.

    There are many ways to move the sale forward, but here are a few. These are simple phrases that keep the customer following you:

    “Let me show you this feature on your new Ford Explorer.”

    “Let me show you this,”

    “Let me show you one more thing,”

    “Great, follow me.”

    Ask for the order, it is quite simple, for example:

    “That’s a feature I’m sure you’d like, isn’t it?” The customer says, “Yeah!” The salesperson says, “Great, follow me,” or “Great, now let me show you one more thing.”

    The above question is one which you should already know the answer. Use it with a feature the customer wants, for example, seat belts, air bags, crumple zones, etc. A customer just won’t say no to seat belts.

    During the sale you are always closing — in sales terminology that means you are always asking the customer for the order. For example, a very successful salesman in a 20-minute presentation will ask the customer in several different ways, in more than a dozen times if they want to buy the vehicle.

    Some of the best closing techniques to use during a sale are called tie downs. Some call them trial closes. A tie down is simply a question at the end of a statement that demands a response. Instead of saying, “Those airbags are a wonderful feature.” In the eyes of a customer, this is just an opinion. But, if I added, “Aren’t they?” to the end of that statement, it forces the customer to respond, hopefully in a positive way.

    Or, “On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the highest rating, how would you rate this vehicle so far? What would it take to make that number a 10?”

    However, sometimes a customer may say something that implies that they don’t like the vehicle. For example, “Oh, that looks like something else that will break.”

    One way to handle these “objections” is to address the issue with the “Feel, Felt, Found” response. For example, you might respond by saying, “I can see why you might feel that. A lot of people have felt the same way, but once you’ve found out the engineering behind, you’ll see how beneficial this can be for you.”

    These few tips will build the foundation for a confident walk around presentation.

    – Learn your product inside and out, research what’s being said about your product on the internet.

    – Get to know your customer’s needs in the initial greeting and qualification.

    – Present with confidence and tie the features back to their needs.

    – Help make their needs become their wants.

    – Remember to refer to competitive brands and create value.

    – Take full advantage of your product expertise when doing a walk around presentation and SELL yourself and your product.

    And remember, selling is a process of listening to customer needs, finding solutions to their needs, building value you in your product or service, and giving them an opportunity to buy that product or service that serves their needs!

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    Source by Vincent Hennigan

    Views: 0

  • Why Jock Itch Might Lead to Lower Sex Drive

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    Jock itch. It’s not a welcome visitor for any guy. Even when a dude is really cautious and careful about his penis health, doing everything he can to avoid an itchy penis, he might still end up with a lousy case of jock itch. And while guys all know about the itchiness and discomfort that come with this condition, not all are aware that jock itch also has the potential to affect a guy’s sex drive – and not in a positive way either.

    What it is

    Known among the medical community by the name tinea cruris, jock itch is a common fungal infection that affects areas of the body covered by or in close proximity to, the area where an athletic supporter is commonly worn. In other words, the penis, balls, inner thighs and buttocks are the most common sites to be afflicted by jock itch.

    It presents as a red, itchy rash; frequently the rash is ring-shaped and raised around the circumference. Often it is redder on the edges and a lighter red on the interior of the ring. Sometimes the ring will have a half-moon shape rather than being round.

    Fortunately, jock itch is not serious; however, it can bring forth an itchy penis that is extremely annoying. In some cases, a man can scratch the itch so ferociously that the area can become infected.

    Jock itch is highly contagious and caused by the same fungus that causes athlete’s foot. So, for example, a man may get it from sharing a towel or clothing of a man with the fungus (either in the form of jock itch or athlete’s foot).

    The sex drive connection

    A man with jock itch may find that it has a negative effect on his sex drive. Often the reason for this is psychological. When a man has an itchy penis or scrotal area that sports examples of tinea cruris, it may deter any potential partners from engaging with him. It may also make a man feel self-conscious and worried that his formerly glorious penis has become diseased-looking and unattractive. This can in turn make him feel unappealing, a sentiment that may stay with him even after visible signs of the condition have disappeared. His sex drive may suffer as a result.

    However, sometimes the decrease in sex drive may be due to the treatment employed to rid himself of his jock itch.

    Many doctors recommend the use antifungal powders or creams as a means of treatment. These are often very effective. But at least two common antifungal medications – clotrimazole and ketoconazole, which are found in many medications – can be lower sex drive culprits.

    Why? Although large scale studies have not been conducted, animal studies do indicate that use of these ingredients in males can lower testosterone levels. Testosterone is created mostly in the testicles and plays a significant role in bone density, muscle development, fat distribution and, of course, sex drive. Essentially, the more testosterone a man produces, the heartier his sexual appetite.

    Fortunately, the effects of these medications on testosterone are temporary; after discontinuation of the treatment, a man should see his sex drive return to normal – and, of course, not all men will see an appreciable difference.

    Treating jock itch is crucial, even if the sex drive is temporarily affected. The itchiness associated with jock itch is often alleviated through the use of a superior penis health crème (health professionals recommend Man1 Man Oil, which is clinically proven mild and safe for skin) with a combination of a high-end emollient (such as Shea butter) and a natural hydrator (such as vitamin E). These two ingredients hydrate the skin and create a moisture lock which helps reduce common itching. Keeping the penis skin healthy through the use of a powerful antioxidant is also advised. A crème with the antioxidant alpha lipoic acid is well poised to fight the free radicals that cause oxidative stress in penis skin cells.

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    Source by John Dugan

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  • How Dirty Bunks At Summer Camp Can Teach You How To Heal

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    When I was a child and a young adult, I spent twenty summers at Camp Ramah, a network of Hebrew-speaking summer camps located throughout North and South America, Israel, Russia and even Eastern Europe. I was a camper, counselor, teacher, division head, Camp Rabbi and assistant camp director at Ramah in the Poconos and Ramah Massachusetts. Aside from having a wonderful time learning all about what it meant to be a “good Jewish boy,” I now realize that it was at Camp Ramah that I learned a valuable life-lesson which would teach me-and you– how to heal from the pain of loss.

    Surprisingly enough, I learned that lesson from our dirty bunks!

    Every single day, our bunk needed to be cleaned, except for Shabbat, our Sabbath. Chores were divvied up, sometimes using a daily “job Wheel of Fortune,” sometime a weekly cleaning assignment, and sometimes the counselor simply told us what to do. No one liked to clean the bunk, but from bunk clean-up, I learned my first, and perhaps most important healing lesson: mourners need to clean out the losses from their lives, to make room for the life of joy and celebration that is waiting to enter. It wasn’t about the clean-up at all, it was about having something to do each day that would help us reach our goal. We were never allowed not to have a job, that was not an option. Each day we had to actually do something, we couldn’t just sit on our beds and read comic books, and we couldn’t just lie in bed all day!

    Now I am a man, and I do not see dirt, whether it was in my bunk at camp or in my home now. But somewhere in the recesses of my mind, I knew then, and know now, that there was indeed dirt which we needed to clean up and remove. Though I mostly didn’t want to clean, I knew it was necessary.

    You could say that when loss enters our lives, our life-bunks become covered with dirt. The dirt won’t go away by itself, it needs to be swept out. That’s why routine tasks are crucial-they help us get out of bed every morning and tend to the chore of cleaning our bunks. Or our lives..

    If you’re like me, you would sometimes rather not do anything to heal, perhaps just wait until “the right time comes along.” It’s too hard, or it hurts too much, or I don’t like making changes so I’ll just stay the way I am right now-as if you could…

    I know people, and so do you, who are still grieving a loss from ten, twenty or even thirty years ago. I know some one whose husband died ten years ago, and to this day has still not emptied out his clothes closet. When I asked her why not, her answer was: I like to feel that he’s still here with me. Okay, I get that, but for her, he is still alive while she is drowning in sadness, and that is not how life is supposed to be. If she cannot clear out his clothes, then she cannot ever begin to heal, because for her, he hasn’t truly died, and she has not yet said goodbye to him. It’s easier, she thinks, to do nothing. Except we know the truth. Doing nothing is worse than just doing nothing. Doing nothing only makes it harder and harder to begin to sweep out that dirt and let the beauty of life enter into our lives.

    So at camp, the dirt needs to be cleaned up and swept out, or else the bunk will get even dirtier. The lesson is clear. When loss comes, we need to similarly begin to clean up, do what needs to be done, and let the healing begin.

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    Source by Dr. Mel Glazer

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  • Whatever Happened to Customer Service?

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    In the old movie, Miracle on 34th Street, the Macy’s Santa sends customers to rival store Gimbels for products that Macy’s does not have. After a management outcry, it then turns out that customers really appreciate this service and become more loyal to Macy’s than ever before.

    Retailers today have forgotten that lesson. Everybody is looking to cut costs. Customer service is no longer considered a revenue generator, so it’s one of the first things on the chopping block when a retailer starts tightening its belt.

    Good customer service is good business. It creates repeat customers. Repeat customers are what every retailer wants because it is far less expensive from a marketing standpoint to sell to a former customer than to bring in new customers.

    Retailers no longer know what makes “good” customer service. The general feeling is that if the product leaves the store and does not come back, everything is fine. Customer service is only for the “problems” and the job of customer service is to make the problems go away at the least possible cost. The less interaction between the store and the customer, the better.

    Superior customer service demands extensive interaction between the customer and the retailer. In my Internet company we look for every possible opportunity to contact and engage the customer. Once a customer has placed an order, the company will contact them at least four times during the 4 week period between the sale and the delivery. The first contact is to acknowledge the order and thank the customer for her (or his) purchase. At that time the customer receives information about the production and delivery process and they are encouraged to call if there are any questions. A second contact is made shortly before production is complete The third contact is made when the product is actually shipped. At this time, there is a detailed description of what the delivery process will entail. There is also a tracking number provided so that the product can be tracked by the customer during the shipping process. The fourth contact is after delivery when each customer is contacted to find out whether they are happy with the product or whether some additional followup is needed.

    When we receive a request for one of our free catalogs, we send it along with a letter noting that we also offer free fabric swatches and free design advice. When an order is placed, we acknowledge the order electronically, then send an email personally thanking the customer. We notify them when the product (in our case sofas) is about to be shipped. We notify them again after it has shipped. Most important, we contact the customer after the product has been received to make sure that everything is OK and that there are no problems. In doing this, sometimes there is a minor problem that the customer might not have mentioned but which distracts from the enjoyment of the sofa — for example a cushion feels too firm. We send out free, softer replacement cushions. The result is that instead of having a silent but disappointed customer, we now have a very happy buyer who enthusiastically recommends us to friends and family. The cost of the extra cushions is a marketing cost.

    The secret behind outstanding customer service is simply to put yourself in the place of the customer. What would you want the company to do if you were the customer? Treat the customer the way you want to be treated.

    1. Answer telephone calls promptly. It is amazing how grateful a customer can be when they realize they are speaking with a real live knowledgeable person who can answer their questions.

    2. Respond to emails and phone messages promptly. All emails phone calls should be handled as quickly as possible, hopefully in less than one hour.

    3. Be honest. It is amazing how often salespeople feel that telling the truth gets in the way of making a sale. If a microfiber fabric already has a stain protector built in and does not need the optional spray protector, tell the customer. Once you have saved them from spending an unnecessary $50, they will trust you completely and might even be willing to forgive minor glitches that may pop up. If a sofa won’t be finished by the promised deadline, call as soon as you are aware of the problem.

    4. Under-promise — If a delivery will take 3 weeks, estimate 4. Customers are usually delighted when something is ready ahead of schedule.

    5. Maximize contact with the customer. This does not mean sending frequent ads or spam. It means keeping the customer informed of the progress of their order up to and after delivery.

    6. Be knowledgeable about your products and your company. If you don’t know the answer to a question, find out quickly.

    7. Surprise and amaze your customer — give them something they do not expect. This can be as simple as delivering your product one week eaarly, or it can involve giving an upgrade at no charge. This is particularly important when an error has been made and you are trying to correct it. Go farther than your customer expects and they will change from disgruntled critics to enthusiastic supporters.

    Retail stores have been cutting back on customer service for years. As competition grows and profit margins shrink, customer service is one of the first places to cut back. Everyone who has ever tried to call a computer company for technical assistance and winds up talking to someone from India knows the problem. Corporate bean counters forget that with good customer service you can earn better margins. You are not forced to fight over who can offer the lowest price. Besides, it’s just nicer working in a friendly environment. When you have happy customers, you have happy employees.

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    Source by Jeff Frank

    Views: 0

  • How Do I Convince My Husband That I’ve Changed My Ways So He’ll Give Me A Second Chance?

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    It’s an awful feeling to be looking back on your marriage with negative hindsight. Sometimes, we don’t see things clearly enough until we’re faced with actually losing them for good. I recently heard from a wife who was experiencing this first hand. Her husband had left her after finally becoming tired of her constantly bending the truth, not treating him in a respectful way, acting irresponsibly, and taking him for granted.

    She said, in part: “I was furious with my husband when he left me. I was mad that he would give up on our marriage without giving me any warning first. But after I began to think clearly, I realized that he did give me plenty of warnings but I wasn’t always paying attention. I spent the money that he mostly earned like crazy and put us heavily into debt. I would bend the truth about my activities so I could keep on doing exactly what he wanted. He worked hard while I had the fun. If he mentioned not being happy about this to me, I’d call him a stick in the mud or asked him if he was my father. I flirted with other guys and didn’t show him the respect he deserved. He was nothing but loving, loyal, and good to me, but I didn’t fully appreciate him until now. So now I’m at the point where I fully realize my mistakes and am committed to changing my ways. I’ve gotten a better job and have stopped the spending, lying, and partying. But when I tell him this, he looks at me with doubt in his eyes and doesn’t make any further attempts to see me. If he would only give me a second chance, I could and would prove to him that our marriage could be different. Will he give me that second chance? How can I make sure that he does?” I’ll try to answer these questions below.

    Usually, In Order For Your Husband To Give You And Your Marriage A Second Chance, Several Things Need To Happen All At Once: Over time, it became pretty obvious that this wife was sincere. It has been months since her husband had left. And, during that time, she had gotten a job, adjusted her thinking and her behavior, and really embraced a new way of life that the husband had been encouraging and calling for all along.

    The wife was frustrated that she’d made all of these changes and yet, despite her repeatedly detailing her mistakes and how she had changed them, her husband still had not been receptive enough to give her another chance or to come home. In fact, he’d started talking about divorce, which was especially upsetting to her.

    This wife didn’t understand that in order for your husband to give you a second chance or to be open to a reconciliation, several things need to happen, as follows:

    1. Your husband needs to completely believe that, not only have you really and truly changed, but that you understand why you acted the way that you did and are completely remorseful for it. He needs to believe that you now see the attributes in him that you missed before so that you won’t continue to take him for granted.

    2. Your husband needs to believe that the changes that you made are lasting and that you didn’t only “change” for his benefit. Many husbands suspect that as soon as he agrees to give you another chance or comes back home, you’ll eventually get comfortable again and resort back to your old ways so that he’s having to deal with the same behaviors over and over again without any escape.

    3. Once your husband believes that you’ve made lasting realizations and changes, then he has to perceive that continuing in a relationship or marriage with you is going to be better for him (or make him more happy) than to continue to be alone. Sure, he might believe that it’s possible that you’ve changed. But sometimes, he still feels that too much negativity has happened between you to really salvage the marriage. Or, he doubts if things can ever really “be the same” again.

    Identifying And Addressing Any Doubts That Your Husband Might Have About Giving You A Second Chance. Where Is His Reluctance And His Resistance Coming From? Admittedly, I didn’t personally know either the husband or the wife in this scenario. So, I couldn’t pinpoint which of the above 3 factors was keeping the husband from believing his wife or from giving her a second chance. But, if the wife truly observed the husband’s behaviors and listened to the clues he was likely offering her, then she should be able to figure out what truly stood in her way.

    Most of the time, this is a gradual process because you have to hang in there in order to keep going long enough to over come what is usually a husband’s considerable resistance and doubt. In truth, this couple had been married for years and yet the wife’s changes had only been around for a few months. The husband likely still had his doubts that the changes were sincere or were truly going to last. And he may have also had his doubts if the two of them could be happy again after he’d walked out on her and given up on the marriage.

    The best way to address these doubts was to just continue on with what she was doing and to give the process time to work. Because with time, the husband could likely see that she truly was sincere and absolutely meant what she said. It helps if you can somehow let your husband know that you are incorporating these changes even when he’s not watching you. If a mutual friend or family member comments about the changes in you without your being present, this can help.

    Here’s one more point that I would like to make. It’s entirely possible that the husband was slowing warming to the idea that his wife could change, but that he still had his doubts that the marriage could truly be a genuinely easy or happy one. The wife admitted to me that sometimes things were tense when they were together because she was frustrated that her plan didn’t seem to be working. This was something that needed to be avoided in the future.

    It’s vitally important that your husband sees you being light hearted, fun loving, and very easy to be around. The relationship and the conversations should be light and should not feel awkward or forced. I know that this sometimes takes some doing, but if every interaction feels or reads negatively, then this will often just reinforce the husband’s belief that the marriage is too far gone to save.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

    Views: 0

  • Traditional Chinese Medicine: Acupuncture Points and Charts

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    What Are the Acupuncture Points?

    The English translation of ‘acupuncture points’ is not very accurate. Acupuncture is one of the many healing methods used in traditional Chinese Medicine. It inserts fine needles into the sensitive points on the body to stimulate Jingluos (meridians) to cure diseases. These sensitive points are called ‘Shuxue’ or ‘Xuewei’ in Chinese Medicine, meaning ‘the transmitting points’. However, this name has been so widely used, there is no point to change it now for our discussion.

    Acupuncture points are the responsive points or sensitive points on the meridians and other parts of the body. They are the special locations where energy is transmitted between the inner structures and the surface of the body. These spots can reflect disease or unhealthy conditions by giving forth painful sensations when touched or pressed. These points are (but not limited to) where the therapists apply treatments. When the body is deficient of positive energy, negative or harmful energy will be able to invade the body through these spots, causing illness. Stimulating the related points can boost and mobilize the positive energy, balance Yin/Yang energy and cure the disease. There are three types of points:

    1. 14-main-meridian points

    2. Extraordinary points

    3.’Yes’ points.

    The 14-main-meridian points are the spots on the 12 main meridians plus the spots on the governor and conception vessels. Each spot has a unique name and a fixed location. They are the main acupuncture points. The extraordinary points are the points that have names and fixed locations. These locations are not on a particular meridian. ‘Yes’ points are also called pain points, but they don’t have names or fixed locations. They are the sensitive points related to the diseases. The ‘yes ‘name came from a story. When treating a patient, the doctor pressed a spot unintentionally, and the patient uttered ‘oh yes’.

    There are approximately 360 acupuncture points in total on the human body. With so many tiny points to remember, one can easily be intimidated. As a matter of fact, for self -healing and caring purposes, we don’t have to memorize all these points. We only need to remember roughly 20 most used and effective points. If you need to use more points, just look for them using the meridian and acupuncture point charts. Each point has a unique and meaningful name, which gives some key information about this particular point, such as main function, usage, location, or other. In English, the English spelling of the Chinese names are directly used. For people who don’t understand Chinese, it is hard to comprehend the significance of each name and, therefore hard to remember all the foreign sounding names.The format of the international symbols for acupuncture points is fairly easy. Since most of the points belong to one specific meridian (Jing), it only makes sense that their symbols are associated with those meridians. You can take two abbreviation letters of that meridian’s name and number all the points along the way, from the starting point to the end point. For example: the name of the Xue-hai point means ‘the sea of blood’ in Chinese and can be used for blood-related issues. Its English symbol is SP10, because it belongs to the spleen meridian and is the 10thpoint from the start.

    How to Find an Acupuncture Point?

    When considering an acupuncture point as a tiny point, it might be really difficult to find it. However, if you think of it as a small precise area, it becomes quite easy. To locate a subject on a 2D plane, you need 2 coordinates. To locate an sensitive point, we use a reference point and a distance. The reference point is a known location on the body, such as ‘the tip of the nose’, ‘the highest point of the ankle bone’ etc. The distance is measured by your own hand. The unit is ‘cun’. The width of your thumb at the mid joint is one ‘cun’, the width of middle three fingers at the mid joints is two ‘cun’, the width of the four fingers (without the thumb) at mid joints is three ‘cun’. How do you know if you have found the right point? When you press on it, if you feel kind of sore and sense a little pain (acute pain means you are not well somewhere), then you are on the right spot. Every main meridian has a primary point. That is the point where the primary energy of this meridian originates. Stimulating this point is one of the most effective ways to boost the positive energy found in this meridian.

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    Source by Wendy Q Wang

    Views: 1

  • Emotional Upsets As We Age – Adult Health and Wellness

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    As we age, it is more likely that we will eventually experience emotional upsets, loss and change. Many of us go from busy, full time workers or full time parents to partial workers, empty nesters and grandparents, to full time retirees, with or without a life partner, adequate financial resources, secure housing, or a network of close family and friends. We may move from a familiar neighborhood to a different retirement community. Friends, neighbors, close relatives and even our beloved house pets may become ill and pass away. Depending upon whether we have developed the positive mental attitudes, uplifting and life affirming spiritual connections, healthy lifestyle, social contacts, and continued passion for living – which researchers describe as the formula for healthy aging – we are more likely to suffer more from illness, disability and emotional instability as we age.

    Complications of Emotional Upsets and Stress

    Stress Accelerates Cellular Aging

    Research is beginning to substantiate the devastating effects of long term stress on health and aging. Telomeres, the DNA-protein structures that cap the ends of chromosomes and promote genetic stability, appear to play important roles in cellular aging and disease. Elisa Epel and colleagues examined the effects of psychological stress on telomere maintenance in 58 healthy premenopausal women. Results, appearing in the December 1, 2004 Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, indicate that the psychologically stressed women had shorter telomeres and less telomerase, a telomere producing enzyme which affects immune function cells in the blood.

    Stressful Jobs Affect Health of the Elderly.

    In workers over age 60, problems on the job raise blood pressure in although these older workers often claim to be less upset and less sad than younger employees when work problems hit. They seem to “feel” less emotion, but their bodies reveal greater stress factors. Older workers may be more vulnerable to heart and cardiovascular problems if they remain in high-pressure jobs or situations.

    Emotional Stress May Precipitate Heart Problems

    Emotional stress can precipitate severe left ventricular heart valve dysfunction in patients who do not apparently have coronary disease. This reversible condition, called myocardial stunning, cardiac stunning or myocardial stress, is brought on by severe emotional stress. Research corroborates the phenomenon that severe emotional stress and heartbreak, such as the break up, loss, or death of a a loved one, can release an onslaught of stress hormones that cause the heart muscle to contract and spasm, possibly leading to severe complications and even loss of life.

    Emotions Affect Blood Cells

    Photos of frozen water crystals imbued with different emotions appeared in the book, The Hidden Messages in Water by Japanese researcher Masaru Emoto. Inspired by these photos, Rebecca Marina attempted to replicate the experiment by having her own blood samples photographed on slides while she caused herself to feel specific emotions.

    She focused first on sadness. In this photograph, her blood cells seemed to actually take on the formation of teardrops and were seen moving rapidly (rather than slowly and sluggishly as we might expect) with a lot of white blood cells predominant, more so than in a normal blood sample.

    When she felt fear, the blood cells moved around rapidly and frantically with an increased number of white blood cells and then stopped moving rather abruptly, as if exhausted.

    Feelings of love produced slower, more placid movement and some sparkly substance in the fluid. Interestingly, when she felt love, the blood cells on the “sadness” slide that had remained on the screen began to change. In other words, even when her blood was no longer inside her body, her feelings of love actually affected the movement, shape and quality of her blood cells on the slide.

    But the most astounding effect was when she focused on Divine Mother or spiritual love and peace. The fluid part of the blood became clear, the movement of the cells was placid, and the cells were just gliding along. The white blood cells that showed had a white glowing center and a pulsation in that center almost like a heartbeat! And some of the cells actually took on a heart shape. (EFT – Emotional Freedom Technique Research)

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    Source by Erica Goodstone, Ph.D.

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  • Implementing the Character’s Emotion

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    Now that you’ve made your choices, how do you generate these emotions and make them readable to the audience? And in doing so, does the actor actually feel the emotions or simulate them? These are the questions often asked about portraying the emotion.

    It stands to reason if you want to affect the audience and move them, you, playing a credible character, must feel these emotions. But you must feel them in such a way that they are conveyed to the audience. The degree to which you feel each emotion will depend upon the method used to carry out this feat and your ability to master it.

    Actors involved in what is termed “Method Acting” use the affective memory to generate emotions. Here the actor recalls a specific event in his own life that has produced the required feeling. For example, remembering a fight you had with another student in high school could arouse the emotion of anger. Recalling the death of a close relative might generate the emotion of grief. The actor has to go back, replay the experience leading to the desired emotion, and relive those moments in his mind. Through this method, the required emotion is revived.

    There are some benefits and also some dangers in this type of emotional generation. Usually, emotions derived this way seem real and deeply moving, more so to the actor than the audience. That’s because there is a tendency to internalize these emotions so much that they are not fully evident to the viewer. The method does make producing emotions seemingly easy, but at a price.

    You will find that emotions take time to evolve naturally and resist abrupt changes when deeply seated in ones memories. This is one reason few method actors make it big in comedy. The changes come too quickly and the method actor usually lacks the required emotional agility. Likewise, the method process takes up valuable rehearsal and production time as the crew and cast wait for the actor to call up the right emotion.

    Actors using the method are likely to develop a self-indulgent feel “good” attitude which gravitates towards feelings closest to them and more comfortable for them to generate. The performance then becomes one that portrays the actor’s reality and not that of the character’s. You can see how this may stifle the actor’s imagination and limit the search for emotional truth. The method can likewise put a strain on the actor’s psyche. Using past events, some best left forgotten, can lead to situations where it affects the actor’s mental stability.

    Another danger is that of becoming bored with affected memory when repeated retakes or performances are required. There is also the possibility of being so caught up in past events one does not relate as the character.

    Another way to generate emotions is to rely on our emotional conditioning, the response to the word for each feeling, and the ability of the body to remember the resulting psychical (of the mind) and physical manifestations. This is the most simple way to produce a whole galaxy of emotions with little effort on our part. Through our childhood development, we are conditioned by the meaning of words, especially with regard to feelings. We respond to them without any conscious thought.

    Consider what happens when you are reading a good book or script. You become involved in the story and the characters. You see and feel their imaginary lives. And when you read the action description:

    She looks at his mangled body, then turns away in horror.

    The word itself is the key to what she felt. We don’t have to stop, reflect back on our own life and re-experience some past event. The response is there before we have time to think. The word itself is the signal to release all the information we have on that emotion and to invoke an immediate physical response.

    This response, while different for each person, still has common traits and a behavior that tells others which emotion is being felt. It’s almost a language in itself and a part of our non-verbal communications.

    The answer lies in the fact that in physiological terms, all emotions have similar traits. That is to say, if we were to test the breathing, heart rate, skin temperature, etc., of two people, one feeling rage and the other joy, the “physiological” signs would be similar. Only the face, gestures, and movements would signal which emotion they were actually feeling. But the flush face, the pulse and breathing rate, etc., all signifying the energy behind the emotion, would determine the size of the emotion.

    Through this process we have learned how to reach and find the emotion. But now, we must learn to nurture these feelings, making them big enough for the performance and adapting them to build credible characters.

    As we said before, emotions are feelings large enough to change your life or destroy it. They need to be powerful feelings, but all that you start with is the small sensation that the name of the emotion evokes. How can we make it bigger?

    As the word for the emotion is read, the actor feels a response centered somewhere in his body. For instance, the emotion “fear” might be felt in the stomach. For another actor, it might be in the shoulders and neck. “Suspicion” causes a response around the eyes. “Lust” in the hips or groin. “Desire” could be centered in the lips or eyes.

    For each actor, the physical response will vary. But the important thing is that the actor feels these responses and gains awareness of the physical symptoms in various parts of his body.

    How do we increase this energy level? There is a technique taught by Don Richardson, a well know TV director. It entails having the actor do some physical exercise, such as push-ups, until he’s completely out of breath. Then after a few moments, have him go directly into the scene with his intention and emotion located and his energy level at a peak. The result is astounding for the actor has no choice but to emote fully.

    The next step is to start from a totally relaxed state, retaining the selected intention and emotion, and then adding what one felt at the peak when doing the push-ups. The small emotion is now fired up by a burst of adrenaline flowing through the system as the body recalls the effect of the push-ups. The emotion is thus achieved on a large-scale as the body remembers the intense physiological state attained earlier.

    Now the emotion has to be adapted to create your specific character and make him credible. Credible emotions evolve out of the character’s perception of reality, their past experiences (emotional conditioning), and their struggles as they strive toward their goals. Character traits also play an important role in how emotions are adapted. For instance, is the person you are portraying mainly rational, mainly emotional, or a balance of the two, and as a result, would the feelings be out flowing, repressed, or even denied? Is there a great deal of inner conflict where the emotions hinder the character from attaining his objectives? What is the dynamic range of feelings, deep, shallow, explosive, etc? All these questions entail a good deal of research into creating the emotional side of a credible character.

    To assist you in this regard, I’ve compiled discussions on the various root emotions. These will aid you in adapting emotions to your specific character needs as well as improving your emotional range and awareness.

    The third way is indicating the emotions through mechanical acting. In this approach, the actor imitates the physical responses, mimicking the feelings as displayed by others.

    People often look down on mechanical acting. Yet sometimes, it becomes a necessity, either as a training or rehearsal tool exploring possible expressions and gestures, or when the actor’s capabilities cannot fulfill the complex demands of the scene. Demands such as acting style, blocking, stage business, and/or quick precise attitude and emotional changes. In such situations, producing the proper emotional illusion through a mechanical response will, at least, get the actor through these difficult moments. In addition, the director may specify certain emotional responses to attain his vision of the story, responses that may later be embellished by editing, music, and sound effects.

    In certain types of performances, particularly comedy sketches, parities, certain sit-coms, and stand up comedy, experience with mechanical acting is helpful. This is because the focus is centered on dialogue emphasis, precise timing, and clarity of attitudes. Likewise, exaggerated surface emotions have the potential to change unexpectedly while deeply felt realistic emotions lack this agility.

    This is not to say that the actor can not feel these emotions. In fact, he may feel them strongly, but the expression begins as a duplication of some physical response. Life studies, the observing of real people, nurture such emotional beginnings.

    ROOT EMOTIONS

    Root emotions are active feelings that clearly convey what is felt by the characters. They do not include happiness, sadness, sorrow, loneliness, or nervousness as these are not an emotion, but state of being. The state of being is the result of an emotion. Root emotions, on the other hand, are the cause and have the potential to affect change.

    Certain weak and complex emotions should likewise be avoided. Self-pity is weak in that it plays an effect and is often resented by the audience. Disinterest and boredom are likewise poor choices as there is no active force to motivate the character.

    Love is also a poor choice in that it is a complex emotion made up of many other feelings. Playing the feeling of love immobilizes the character rather than inviting action. A better choice would be to play a definitive emotion such as desire, lust, joy, exhilaration, or exaltation. In an unstable relationship, other emotions such as jealousy, suspicion, bewilderment, guilt, or embarrassment, along with certain other emotions, could be used. By using one single root emotion at a time, subtle shadings within the realm of love can be clarified as well as changes in the intensity.

    The emotions of the characters also plays into the psychological experience of the audience. It might be the voyeurism of spying on the character’s intimate moments. It could also be the vicarious experience of identifying with character’s situation or problems. It could also be the visceral feelings we experience as we watch the scene unfold, emotions moving us and giving us a sense of being entertained. Strong emotional choices and well-portrayed feelings, ones that connect with the viewer, can make for interesting and memorable scenes. They can help create anticipation, arouse curiosity, and hook us enough to be intrigue and involved.

    I’ve divided the most frequently used root emotions into five different categories. Each category is further clarified as to the focus of the emotion as well as the general clarifications.

    ROOT EMOTIONS

    DARK EMOTIONS (Active – Directed at or against someone, something.)

    Rage

    Anger

    Hatred

    Contempt

    Jealousy

    Envy

    SURVIVAL ORIENTED (Reactionary – Selfish – Focus usually on the expected or imagined.)

    Terror

    Horror

    Fear

    Dread

    Despair

    Grief

    Suspicion

    Apprehension

    GOAL ORIENTED (To find, to obtain, to provide – Focus usually on wants.)

    Revenge

    Ambition

    Greed

    Hope

    Desire

    Lust

    Determination

    Compassion

    Curiosity

    EGO ORIENTED (Self evaluation & result – Focus usually on masking or repressing the emotion.)

    Guilt

    Shame

    Indignation

    Intimidation

    Embarrassment

    Resentment

    BRIGHT EMOTIONS (Enjoyable – upbeat – Focus usually on the continued enjoyment.)

    Exaltation

    Joy

    Pride

    Exhilaration

    Wonderment

    Bewilderment

    In review, root emotions motivate you to fight for something, to change your (the character’s) life or destroy him (the character’s dramatic soul). To be a strong sympathetic character, always play the fighter’s side of the emotion, thinking you can win rather than loose. The physical look of one particular emotion will vary depending on the story situation, the characters, and the natural casting chemistry within and between actors.

    To further your knowledge on this subject, explore the physical sensations, sources, forms, and dynamics of the most common root emotions. Observe emotions in life as well as performances. What are the defining characteristics? Such research will also serve as a guide in stretching the clarity, strength, and polarity of your emotional repertoire.

    This chapter has covered the basic skills used in building and implementing dramatic emotions. Use these skills as tools to nurture and release the character’s true feelings, and make them readable to the audience. Most important, create emotions that serve the story, its genre and purpose.

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    Source by Erik Sean McGiven

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  • Homosexual Dating – Truth and Connection

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    Homosexual dating has become much more widespread and accepted in Western culture, allowing both gays and lesbians the chance to reach out to one another beyond that of closed doors. Now there are many ways you can have a rewarding homosexual dating experience, so don’t be afraid to get out there and explore all of the potential relationships you can create at a wonderful same-sex communities.

    Homosexuality is a form of love that needs not to be judged or explained, because it is just another example of how when you love someone it doesn’t matter what colour their skin is, how old they are, or even what sex they are. True love knows no boundaries, has no discriminations and only wishes to be shared with another who returns the same emotions.

    Unfortunately, not everyone agrees with this idea of love, and due to this fact, many homosexuals, regardless if they are male or female, are made to feel alienated, which can often lead to feelings of depression or loneliness. There is no reason why you should let these feelings overcome you, or let other opinions of those you care about, such as family members or friends, negatively influence your life when it comes to finding love, relationships, and homosexual dating.

    Homosexual dating is about finding someone who feels the same way you do, enjoys spending time with you, treats you with respect and makes you feel like an equal. It is about being apart of a relationship with mutual understanding, which has the potential to forge a strong connection between both you and your partner.

    Like any dating experience, there will be certain setbacks and struggles that you may face during homosexual dating. This is only natural, simply because in order for you to connect with someone, it is important that you feel comfortable with them.

    As a gay or lesbian, you should not feel that you need to grab any opportunity that comes your way. There is no harm in starting as friends and working slowly into the relationship to discover how much you have in common. As long as you are honest with your feelings, you should have no problem finding a partner.

    Homosexual dating is how you can establish an amazing connection with someone who understands you, and loves you for who you are with no questions asked. Even though you will meet some people who are destined to give you a hard time with your sexual preference, all you can do is trust your own judgments, be true to yourself, and give your love and time to those who deserve it.

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    Source by Frank Duru

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