Tag: Brings

  • Finding Your Wealthy Place – Five Steps of Entering Your Wealthy Place

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    You can enter into your wealthy place. It is important however to indicate that such is not an overnight thing. It is a process. Never try to take shortcuts. The good news is that there are sure steps you can follow to reach your wealth place. They are described as follows:

    1. Know and Understand That There Is a Wealthy Place in God

    Not every believer knows that he or she has a wealthy place. That is the reason some believers do not bother working on becoming wealthy. They think having a job is enough. But having only a job cannot make you wealthy. You need to also do something apart from your job. Do business and or invest where you can make money. A paycheck normally meets life’s necessities. But you also have wants. What about them. You need abundance. If only your needs are met, how are you going to be a blessing to the nations (to others).

    “I will bless you and make your descendants into a great nation. You will become famous and be a blessing to others.

    I will bless anyone who blesses you, but I will put a curse on anyone who puts a curse on you. Everyone on earth will be blessed because of you.” (Genesis 12:2-4).

    Abraham was promised a blessing and becoming great if he obeyed. Guess what? He obeyed and was blessed to be a blessing. So shall you be blessed if only you will obey. Someone might say, “Ah! This was said to Abraham and his descendents i.e. his seed.” Just look at the following scripture:

    “So if you belong to Christ, you are now part of Abraham’s family, and you will be given what God has promised.” (Galatians 3:29 – Contemporary English Version). Other versions say we are Abraham’s seed. I hope you know the song, “Abraham’s blessings are mine.” We used to sing that song but I don’t hear much of it today. So we are saying you are blessed.

    If you have been praying and confessing but still broke, revisit the Word and see what God is saying about issues of money. There is a wealthy place. We read in Psalm 105:37, “He [the Lord] brought them forth also with silver and gold: and there was not one feeble person among their tribes.” Do you see the GREAT God we serve? He does not want us to go empty handed. He is a God of abundance. I hope you remember the Father who had two sons (parable of the prodigal son). In Luke 15:11-12, it is recorded, “And the younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that falleth to me. And he divided unto them his living.” A good Father has a portion for everyone of his sons. As sons of God, our Father has a portion for everyone of us. Find your wealthy place. It is your portion.

    2. Locate Wealth

    Maybe you are asking yourself, “What is the wealthy place?” This is a place of more than enough. Here are other lands:

    Land of “not enough”

    We have our excuses for dwelling in this land. Excuses like, “Brother, not everyone is supposed to be rich. So I am OK the way I am. I am fine.” Others say, “I don’t want much my sister. I love the Lord. I pray and read the Bible. I am satisfied with what I have.” But you see, these are all religious excuses. There is abundance. Most of us know this land. Many passed through it. It is a land of struggling in life.

    Then thine heart be lifted up, and thou forget the Lord thy God, which brought thee forth out of THELAND OF EGYPT, from THE HOUSE OF BONDAGE. (Deuteronomy 8:14).

    It is time to come out of this land in Jesus Name. It does not glorify God in any way.

    The Land of ‘Just Enough’

    Most people in life park in the land of “just enough.”They are not trying to justify why they are here. They are satisfied with being here. They have just enough and are barely getting by. But they are satisfied. When you are satisfied you don’t fight for anything. You will not fight for your rights or try to have more. But this is not good enough child of God. It is true that God brings us to one land at a time. Why?

    “And thou shalt remember all the way which the Lord thy God led thee these forty years in the wilderness, to humble thee, and to prove thee, to know what was in thine heart, whether thou wouldest keep his commandment, or no.

    And he humbled thee, and suffered thee to hunger, and fed thee with manna, which thou knewest not, neither did thy fathers know; that he might make thee know that man doth not live by bread only, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of the Lord doth man live.” (Deuteronomy 8:2, 3).

    During the wilderness experience, the Israelites were allowed to have “just enough”. God fed them with manna for each day. They were not allowed to gather more. Some tried and the manna got rotten and infested with worms. They were still on their way to their “wealthy place”.

    Through the stages of our walk to the wealthy place there is a learning process. In the land of “not enough” you learn to depend on God for your needs (deliverance). Then in the land of “just enough” you learn that God can move you from one level to another. You need to demonstrate more trust on God. Furthermore, you learn to be trustworthy. God should trust you to be the guardian of His wealth. Some testing takes place. You must be seen to be faithful on the little so that much can be given to you.

    The Land of ‘More Than Enough’

    As children of God, we should all be headed to this land. The question is, “Why is it important to get into this land i.e. the wealthy place? This is because once you are in this land; you can help your neighbor. This is part of knowing and fulfilling your covenant. God said to Abraham, “… I will bless thee… and thou shalt be a blessing” (Gen. 12:2). In other words, God told Abraham, “I will bless you and your family so much that you will have to give some of your blessings away.”

    3. Be Willing to encounter obstacles and giants

    As you are willing to encounter obstacles and giants, withstand them using the Word of God. Many believers are not even willing to go into their wealthy place. They are not even thinking about it. Do you know why? It is because there are giants. Have you noted how difficult and challenging to get more money? The reason is that there are giants in the wealthy place. There has to be some fighting and perseverance to enter there.

    “And they [the twelve spies] told him [Moses], and said, We came unto the land whither thou sentest us, and surely it floweth with milk and honey; and this is the fruit of it.

    NEVERTHELESS the people be strong that dwell in the land, and the cities are walled, and very great: and moreover we saw the children of Anak there.” (Number 13:27, 28).

    Not child of God that this was their wealthy place. God had given it to them. They were supposed to go and take it with God’s support. That is how some of us believers react to the promises of God. We have heard the promises given. But because of the obstacles and challenges, we end up not willing to go forward. We decide to settle for less. There will indeed be resistance. God wants to see us moving forward and then He will support us. Believe the Word and do it in Jesus Name.

    Have a good attitude towards the Word of God. Be willing to obey. Look at the attitude of a believer who trusts God:

    In Numbers 13:30, Caleb said, “… Let us go up at once, and possess it; for we are well able to overcome it.” Does it mean this believer didn’t see the giants? He saw them. But he saw God bigger than the giants. Now, who is magnified in your life? Is it God (His Word) or the giants? There is a wealthy place to be possessed. The other spies saw themselves as grasshoppers in the eyes of the giants except Joshua and Caleb. Guess what happened? Out of the generation that came out of Egypt, only Joshua and Caleb entered the “wealthy place”. Why? The believed and acted on the Word of God. Do you believe the Word? Are you going to act on it?

    4. Expand your capacity to receive Wealth

    In order to enter into your wealthy place, you need to cooperate with God. Have an excellent spirit like Joshua and Caleb. The reason why those who died in the wilderness without entering into the place of plenty is that they did not have the capacity to receive the wealthy land. Do not die in the wilderness. The place of “just enough” or place of “not enough”.

    Some way or another, if you are going to receive in life what God has for you, you are going to have to be willing to take a step forward in faith from the mess you are in, toward the promise of God. When you do, God will meet you there. If your faith is really in God and His Word, your faith will not be denied- not now, not ever!

    “If ye be willing and obedient, ye shall eat the good of the land” (Isaiah 1:19). Allow God to enlarge you by the power of His Word and Spirit.

    5. Step Five: Take the limits off God

    If there is something that can hinder God’s full manifestation in our lives, it is our unbelief. Otherwise God is more than willing to take us to our wealthy place. He works in our lives to the extent that we believe and allow Him. He cannot force His way.

    “Yea, they TURNED BACK and TEMPTED GOD,and LIMITED THE HOLY ONE OF ISRAEL.” (Psalm 78:41).

    You are the only one that can limit God. After you have removed the limits, adjust your vision. God once told Abraham that as far as his eyes would see, that land He was going to give to him. You can receive only what you can see. It is all in the Word. The question is, “Can you see it with your physical eyes closed?”

    You remember Elisha’s servant Gehazi? When attacked by the Syrians he was afraid but Elisha told him not to. Why? There were angels all around them. Look at the following:

    “And when the servant of the man of God was risen early, and gone forth, behold, an host compassed the city both with horses and chariots. And his servant said unto him, Alas, my master! how shall we do?

    And he answered, Fear not: for they that be with us are more than they that be with them.

    And Elisha prayed, and said, LORD, I pray thee, open his eyes, that he may see. And the LORD opened the eyes of the young man; and he saw: and, behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire round about Elisha. (2 Kings 6:15-17).

    In the Name of Jesus Christ, I pray that your eyes may be opened and that you may see all that the Lord has prepared for you.

    Blessings in Jesus Name!

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    Source by Elphas Sipho Mdluli

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  • Biotechnology and Social Entrepreneurship: The Perfect Symbiosis

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    This is the era of globalization where modernization in every sector is essential due to societal changes and the continuous demand for a quality life. It’s the duty and a moral obligation of every industry to assist in providing a better way of life to those who are less fortunate and require your help. In such conditions, one needs to be resourceful, altruistic, have qualities pertaining to that of a businessman, and have a scientific view. Biotechnology as such is a field that can contribute to various individuals in terms of money as well as its inventions. This industry has grown monumentally over the years and has helped people find hope and restore their belief in humanity with its applications in the field of genetics, agriculture, food, medicine, and healthcare.

    Biotechnology and social entrepreneurship can go hand in hand. For example, by providing better healthcare options at cheaper costs, consumers are motivated to opt for Biotech products. In this way, the Biotech organizations can help move low-income communities toward better health, and by purchasing their products, the consumers are indirectly promoting the company’s brand. Creating employment opportunities, intellectual wealth, and expanding industrial growth are a few of the absorbing factors that guarantee a focused approach for this sector, resulting in a general benefit to society.

    Scientific entrepreneurs often lack managerial competencies, industrial experience, and contacts, even if they integrate members with an administrative background; so therein lies a critical area that requires some work. Solutions to certain social problems, such as improving the quality of health, economic, political, and cultural problems in reference to poverty, often require fundamental transformations in the political, economic, and social systems. A Social Entrepreneur brings change to the social system by utilizing their work and business to address that cause. Such ingenious creativities represent social entrepreneurship. Hence, it can be stated that the approaches for network building observed by biotech companies regarding social entrepreneurship will combine behavioral features that are archetypal of biotechnology entrepreneurs, and include other characteristics that are a response to the conditions found in their particular environment.

    An excellent managerial team can provide the necessary skills for the management and coordination of scientific and commercial operations, and can also help maintain a good organization repute. One key area where social entrepreneurs play a vital role is in the commercialization of research results of the biotechnology industry thus, warranting sustainable growth. A working local innovation system with respect to the connections between companies and knowledge organizations can be the stimulus to this implementation.

    For example, Juan David and Alicia Carpio launched Q’omer Bioactive Ingredients, a technology-based social enterprise. They witnessed the condition of people regarding their farms and unfair labor deals in Peru, so they designed a sustainable and socially responsible way of working with resources in Latin America. They offer raw materials and ingredients to produce organic products and improve the well-being of people while promoting the economic and social sustainability of producers from Latin America. This is only one example, but with each passing year, more and more Biotech companies are taking the initiative to promote social entrepreneurship and contribute to various societies by providing scholarships, funding, and research options in the field of Science.

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    Source by Chris Bouchard

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  • Life Lessons Learnt Post Drug Detox

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    Drug addiction is a chronic illness that brings misery not only to the life of the individual addicted, but also to his or her loved ones. In recent years, drug addiction has become a matter of serious concern for the United States as a large number of young adults in the country are getting addicted to prescriptions drugs and illegal substances at an alarming rate.

    The “drug culture” rampant in the American society takes a heavy toll on the people’s personal as well as professional lives. Sometimes, the influence of the drug can be so strong that it may lead to several other serious issues, such as increased risk for physical and mental ailments, suicidal thoughts, and even death.

    However, drug addiction is a preventable and curable disease that can be treated with medications and counseling. Medical detoxification is the first step toward quitting the vice of addiction and leading a productive life. Though the detox process is essentially aimed at removing toxins from the body after a long-term drug use, it teaches some incredible life lessons along the way.

    Listed below are some of the lessons that people learn during drug detox in a rehabilitation program, which can be carried out for many years to come:

    1. Addiction does not discriminate

    Drug addiction can affect anybody regardless of age, gender, ethnicity, race, or even socio-economic class. Often starting as an experiment, people gradually cross the illusive line of addiction, from where there is no turning back. However, the good news is that an effective detox program can help such people get rid of the devastating habit.

    2. Increasing awareness about addiction is important

    Being aware about the ways in which a particular drug can affect an individual and knowing about the legal repercussions of its addiction can motivate a person and his or her loved ones to stay away from the drug. Also, being aware of the right detox program is important to ensure a speedy recovery for a person who is already in the clutches of destructive drug use.

    3. Addiction leaves one lonely

    Drug addiction is a chronic illness that makes an individual live in solitude. Those fighting substance abuse disconnect themselves from the external world and stay aloof from friends, relatives and other loved ones. Undergoing a detox program teaches a person to make friends, lead a social life and engage in healthy habits.

    4. Self-care is essential

    Taking care of own body and mind is important to keep oneself fit and healthy. This is also required to ensure that a vulnerable individual does not get trapped into drug addiction, and continues to lead an addiction-free life post detox.

    5. Running away from stress does not prevent drug addiction

    For many individuals, addiction generally develops when they feel low, sad or depressed. However, in a detox program, a person comes face-to-face with such negative emotions and makes efforts to develop “emotional sobriety” first, in order to lead a drug-free life.

    Leading a drug-free life is possible

    Abusing any form of drugs, including prescription drugs, is illegal and can deteriorate the life of any individual. A comprehensive detoxification is a must in every drug rehabilitation program as it prepares the patient for further treatment procedure. The complexity of detoxification depends on the nature and length of the abuse.

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    Source by Barbara Odozi

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  • Prophetic Declaration to Overcome Storms of Life in Your Marriage: Powerful Life Changing Prayers

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    If you are faced with problems in your marriage and business, it is only by divine intervention that you will overcome such problems.

    Bible Verses and Prayers to Encourage You As You Face The Battle of Life

    Psalm 23: 1-6 (KJV) "The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

    Prayers to Encourage You As You Face The Battle of Life

    – Lord Eliminate the Spirit of always wanting to give up my Life in the Name of Jesus.

    – Give me a fresh breeze of release to lighten my load in Jesus Name.

    – Send the right people in my life to be a source of love, guidance and new opportunities.

    – Teach me your way and your will in Jesus Name

    – Speak to me Lord in a way that I would understand and obey in Jesus Name.

    – If nobody else in the whole world seems to care or believe in me, let me believe in myself.

    – I know there will be times when I doubt my own ability, I will be discouraged, on the verge of despair.

    – Don't let me give up, hang on to me. Fan the fires of my faith so that I will try even harder.

    – Give me even more faith in myself in Jesus Name.

    – I come boldly before your throne of grace.

    – Your word says that you give strength to the weary, so I ask that you would strengthen me Lord, for I am weary.

    – Bless me Lord with your presence, that my heart might be encouraged.

    – Help me remember your faithfulness and your love that I might stand in faith against the issues that face me.

    Prophetic Declaration over your marriage

    Bible says that the ear of the lord is not deaf nor his hand short that he does not hear us, but our iniquities have separated us from our God (paraphrased) Isaiah 59: 1. We therefore must first bring repentance over our past participation by thoughts words or deed our iniquities which would cause the Lord not to hear us.

    Prayer Points

    – I repent over every sin and wickedness in my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – I turn way from everything in my life that gives Satan a foothold and legality in my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – I repent of every ungodly confession I have made over my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – I repent of every ungodly confession that is standing as a witness and testimony before you in the name of Jesus.

    – Father have mercy upon me in the name of Jesus.

    – Forgive me for wrong confessions, utterances, declarations, thoughts, actions, I have done which are speaking against me, before you in the name of Jesus.

    – I decree and declare that in my marriage shall receive and release the strength, honor, glory that marriage brings in Jesus name.

    – I decree and declare that in my marriage shall reflect the glory of God in Jesus name.

    – I decree and declare that two shall put to flight Ten thousand, that is my portion in my marriage in Jesus name.

    – I decree and declare that wicked patterns and cycles of marriages in my bloodline broken in the name of Jesus and by the voice of the blood of the lamb.

    – Every handwriting of wicked codes speaking against my marriage in be bloated out by the blood of Jesus.

    – I station Angels of defense along my marriage in Jesus name

    – Blood of Jesus surround my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – I station the word of the Lord as a wall around my marriage, it shall not be like a city with no walls in Jesus name.

    – I decree and declare that I will have prophetic utterances over my marriage in Jesus name.

    – Blood of Jesus step into the foundation of my marriage and align it to the word of God in the name of Jesus

    – Blood of Jesus speak healing into my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus speak restoration into my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus speak love into my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus speak joy into my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus speak peace to my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus speak harmony into my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus speak unity into my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus speak wisdom into my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus speak understanding into my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus speak knowledge into my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus speak fruitfulness into my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – I raise the banner and the standard of Christ and declare the Lordship of Jesus over my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – I decree and declare that my marriage shall bear good fruits in Jesus name.

    – Every Spirit of barrenness is broken, and destroyed by the power of the blood of Jesus in my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Every pain In my marriage, balm of Gilead cleanse it, heal it Lord, in the name of Jesus.

    – Every bitterness In my marriage, balm of Gilead cleanse it, heal it Lord, in the name of Jesus.

    – Every anger In my marriage, balm of Gilead cleanse it, heal it Lord, in the name of Jesus.

    – Every unforgiveness In my marriage, balm of Gilead cleanse it, heal it Lord, in the name of Jesus.

    – Every sorrow In my marriage, balm of Gilead cleanse it, heal it Lord, in the name of Jesus.

    – I decree and declare that the scent of my marriage shall be a pleasing aroma in your sight Lord and in the body of Christ in the name of Jesus.

    – I decree and declare that springs of life from your fountain will come forth and water every dry area in my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Resurrection power of God rest upon every dead area in my marriage and resurrect it in Jesus name.

    – I decree and declare the Angel in charge of marriages shall walk with me in my marriage.

    – I release every goodness my marriage is to bring to my life in Jesus name.

    – let every stranger in my marriage be evicted in the name of Jesus.

    – Let the angel of the Lord pursue to destruction every stranger in my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – Every ungodly voice over my marriage be silenced by the voice of the blood of Jesus.

    – Blood of Jesus blot out every wicked ordinance that is standing as a testimony against my marriage in the courtrooms of heaven in the name of Jesus

    – I station the Angel in charge of marriages at the gate of my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – I stand in agreement with what the Angel in charge of marriages is confessing before the courts of heaven concerning my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – I stand in agreement with what the blood of Jesus is speaking before the courtrooms of heaven concerning my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – I stand in agreement with what Jesus the mediator is speaking before the courtrooms of heaven concerning my marriage.

    – Father I pray let my offerings and tithes stand as a testimony and a witness on behalf of my marriage in the courtrooms of heaven.

    – Father I pray arise and become a witness for me against every adulterer in my marriage in the name of Jesus.

    – I decree and declare that the bars of my marriage gates will be strengthened in the name of Jesus

    – I declare my marriage shall be restful, joyous, happy, full of the glory of God.

    – I station these words at the gates of my marriage in Jesus name.

    – I put the seal of the blood of Jesus on my marriage in the name of Jesus.

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    Source by Dr Olusola A Coker Ed.D

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  • The Advantages and Disadvantages of Being Wealthy and Successful

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    As far as I know, almost everyone wants to become wealthy and successful. Being wealthy and successful allows you to lead a comfortable life, buy anything you want to buy, do whatever you want to do and many others. However, it also brings you some disadvantages. Below I will explain them in detail.

    Advantages

    There are countless advantages and I will introduce three major ones.

    1. Wealth and success can guarantee you a high quality life. Many people are pursuing wealth and success because of this reason. Being wealthy means having a lot of money. So you will not worry about matters which are related to money. You can receive the best education, afford the best healthcare and buy anything you want. Besides, you will never worry about your work because you have enough money to feed yourself. In a word, you will be fully satisfied with your life and love your life.
    2. Being wealthy and successful can make you more confident. If you are a successful man, you will find that many people respect you and then you will have a feeling of victory. This will make you much more confident and your confidence and aura will be embodied in your life and work. Moreover, your accomplishments can also give you confidence and satisfaction. Some accomplishments can not be easily achieved but you are able to achieve them. Then, you will receive appreciations from other people.
    3. If you are wealthy and successful you may consider doing some charity work. There are many poor and helpless people around the world. Maybe you want to help them out before but do not have enough money, so when you are rich, you can achieve your desire. Doing some charity work can make you happy, contented and delighted.

    Disadvantages

    Being wealthy and successful does have some disadvantages.

    1. It is hard to know whether your friends or partners are interested in your money or not. When you have gained wealth and success, many people are willing to make friends with you. So you will not know who your genuine friends are.
    2. Perhaps you will be an open target for kidnap or blackmail. If you have much money, some lawless person may plan to kidnap you or your relatives to earn some money.

    Although there are some disadvantages, being wealthy and successful is still an attractive thing. Everyone can gain wealth and success as long as he tries his best to work hard.

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    Source by Sharon R Chen

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  • My Opinion on Sex and Love

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    Sex is not the perfect way to express your love: Rather it’s the perfect way to express love’s feelings. It’s perfect between a husband and a wife, a boy and a girl. It’s not only a physical activity, instead of it mostly a spiritual integration of two souls. It joints the spirit of the people involve. Sex is not love and love isn’t sex. Many often muddle the difference between sex and love. Most people don’t perceive that there’s a difference between them. In this note I’ll give my view on why these things are different from one another.

    Let’s start with sex. It’s something that does not often slump real feelings, real relationship or even a committed. There are few peoples who seek enjoyment from one-night stands. Often many have a ‘friend with benefits’, that’s what I would put under the sex’s category. There are never any real or deep feelings; it’s only about the enjoyment of the act. Usually when people only search to have sex, there’s very little opposite play and intimacy afterwards, the cuddling and holding of one another, well that doesn’t happen often.

    Many people are happy with having sex only for pleasure, never caring for the emotional circumstance of being in love. Often some will lope partner to partner because that’s all they’re searching that’s the instant rush and release in the sex’s pleasure. I’m one of the ones who have never been capable to do this thing. I could never jump into a one-night stand and I could never only have a “friend with benefits”. These parts are the values I’ve about lovemaking. It also, for me, means more that my friend is in love with me, and sex isn’t only about enjoyment. It’s where making love comes into play.

    When two people are in love, and who share the emotional bond with one another, they superintendence very much about making their partner feel desired and taken care of. When an individual is in love makes love to their partner, they give all their needs, not only sexually. They’ll take time by doing sex and making their lover happy. They’re careful to their partner’s every desires and needs. They get more pleasure out of tolerable them then they do themselves.

    Often times, they don’t always need to be glad while making love. Making love between couple who are in love is often intimate and slow. After lovemaking, many people that love one another will clasp and cuddle their lover like a deeper form of close affinity afterwards. It also brings the lovers together and they interconnect deeper on that soulful bond.

    Which is more essential to you in marriage?

    Love, sex or nothing…

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    Source by Sushil Chand

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  • My Husband Wanted The Separation, But Now He’s Constantly Trying To Keep Tabs On Me

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    I sometimes hear from wives who are very confused about their husband’s conflicting behavior during a martial separation. Often, he is the one who initiated the separation and it seems as if he almost can’t wait to leave. But as soon as the couple are living apart, suddenly the husband wants to keep tabs on the wife or seems particularly interested in her day to day activities.

    I heard from a wife who said: “my husband has been wanting to separate for a while. I tried my best to talk him out of it, but after listening to him insist upon it for months, I finally gave in and agreed to go and live with my sister for a little while. Since he was so anxious to get rid of me, I really didn’t expect to hear from him, although I knew that I would miss him terribly. I’ve been gone only two days, but now he is constantly calling me and wanting to know what I’m doing. I will answer the phone and the first thing he says to me is ‘what are you doing’ in an almost accusatory way. The truth is, I’m not doing anything and I tell him so. Why does he even ask? He couldn’t get rid of me quickly enough and now it’s like he wants to keep checking on me. What is going on?” I’ll try to answer these questions in the following article.

    He May Just Be Missing You: Men often envision having all kinds of peace and quiet so that they can think. But, sometimes this just isn’t the reality. Sometimes all that silence brings about is loneliness. And then he can start to wonder if this was such a good idea after all. And he looks around and notices that everything around him reminds him of you. Now, it might make things easier if he would just tell you all of this, but many men will not. Instead, they’ll call you and do annoying things like asking what, or how, you are doing.

    He Might Be Feeling Insecure: It’s very common for separated spouses to admit that they at least partly suspect that their spouse might eventually see other people during the separation. Your spouse might be acting on this suspicion or just looking for reassurance, which leads me to my next point.

    He’s Trying To Determine Your Frame Of Mind: It’s common for the spouse who initiated the separation to have a strong suspicions that you are going to be resentful and angry. Therefore, he might want to keep in close touch to gauge your feelings. He may want to see if your resentment is going to drive you away. And he may be feeling some remorse for his actions.

    Taking Some Positive Implications From These Annoying Questions: I know that this is probably very frustrating. But there is some positive indications here. If he didn’t care at all, he wouldn’t be calling. If he wasn’t thinking about you at all and was living it up and celebrating his freedom, he wouldn’t be calling either. And since this wife didn’t want the separation in the first place and wanted to save her marriage, this was hopefully good news to her.

    How To Respond When He Keeps Calling And Asking What You’re Doing: First, you have to decide what you really want to happen. And ultimately, this wife wanted her husband to come home. I know that it’s tempting to say something like ‘well what do you think I’m doing? I’m sitting here staring at my sister and living in a strange place because you made me leave my own home for your silly separation,’ but this is a bad idea. Because you don’t want to discourage him from reaching out to you. Instead, you want to make him want to check in and initiate contact with you. So, as difficult as it may be, try to sound as upbeat as possible. Trying to make him feel guilty is the wrong call too, because it brings about pain and makes him want to avoid you. With that said, you don’t want to make it sound as if you are sitting by the phone waiting for his call. You want for him to know that you have too much self respect for that.

    An appropriate response might be something like: “not much. I’m just spending some time with my sister. We’ll probably go out and grab some dinner in a little while. What are you doing?”

    Notice I was light hearted and I turned the question back to him. And I alluded to the fact that no one was sitting around waiting. By asking what he was doing, you’re leaving it open ended for him to share his feelings. He might say that he’s not doing anything because he’s lonely. Or he might say that what he’s really doing is missing you. The point is to not engage with him and don’t ask him why he keeps calling you with his silly questions. Try to stay positive because this really is a good sign. It means he is interested and that he is reaching out. And not all separated spouses fall into this category. Some husbands rarely call their wives at all, let alone care about their experiences or feelings.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

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  • Tony Robbins – Personal Power II – Day 17 – Wealth Conditioning

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    “Money is nothing but a means to measure the exchange of value between people.”

    ~ Tony Robbins

    Many of us have pain associated with wealth in an approach/avoidance dance. Because of events in our past, we can call these “wealth wounds”. There can be lots of sensitivity about financial issues and so if these wounds are not healed, it is impossible to gain a ton of financial resources.

    Generally speaking, poverty and lack brings out the worst in people and abundance brings out the best. People who are living in poverty tend to have the highest criminal records, the most drug use and the most unhappiness. Being one of the consistently broke group of people doesn’t help you or the group. You can do more good by becoming wealthy in order to be able to give back.

    There are seven reasons why most people never make it financially.

    1). They associate negative things to having or making money. Remember, the past does not equal the future.

    2). They do not set having an abundance of money as an absolute must. Unless we decide what is a necessity, not an option, how can there be any improvement?

    3). Having an effective strategy of building wealth is non-existent for them. To condition yourself for great wealth, strategies must be developed for

    • attracting money into your life
    • managing your dollars
    • sharing your money, which will give you much happiness

    4). They are unable to follow through consistently on their financial goals. Finding ways for your money to work for you, such as harnessing compound interest which can take a lot of pressure off if you have time to watch it grow.

    5). They depend too much on the “experts.” There is no one who cares more about your money than you do. Experts are valuable, but you need to take care of your money and taxes. If you make errors in these types of decisions and planning, you will be ultimately responsible, not your professional.

    6). They become financially complacent. Many people take their wealth for granted. Whatever you fail to use, you will lose. It is a good idea to note that if you do well with what you have, you’ll be able to get more and, if you don’t actively create welth, itwhat you have will be taken from us. Don’t hoard what you have.

    7). They allow financial challenges go from bad to worse into financial ruin. Most likely, the road to wealth is not a straight line. If and when problems arise, stay in the game and ask great questions to help get back on track.

    Be willing to transform crisis into opportunity. By having financial faith, you can learn from the situation and find even more opportunities.

    The assignment:

    Give yourself a financial checkup to find out your “wealth wounds” so you can heal yourself quickly:

    1). Ask yourself to list the beliefs that you have that hold you back.

    2). Is there a specific amount of money that is an absolute MUST? Is this number the “must” for your life, or is this number the ability to live comfortably by paying your current bills?

    3). “Never leave the site of setting a goal or making a decision without taking some action towards its fulfillment. Make sure you do some action to set you on the course for financial mastery.

    4). Find something in today’s session to start feeling like you’re making progress. Remember, tiny actions lead to a pattern of habits which ultimately can be used to create the financial freedom we all deserve.

    5). You can make a list of financial terms or aspects of financial management that are not fully understood. Find the people or resources who cn provide answers about these things.

    6). Remember we talked about complacency? Write a paragraph about the “why” you will follow through with your plan and avoid complacency. Recognize the excuses you used in the past. Mastery is the only option now.

    7). Ultimately, what frees us from fear, is the belief that we are much more than anything that could ever happen to us financially. Write down one or two situations that seemed very difficult that you pulled yourself through. Remind yourself that you have this capacity to turn challenges into success.

    Sometimes our “wealth wounds” are most tender to try and heal, but the good news is that there are ways to heal them. One way is to find someone who has successfully gotten where you’d like to be. You can “model” after their example if you find out exactly what they did and then follow that pattern.

    Taking the time to do these exercises will teach you more about yourself. Fine tuning the skills in this lesson will provide additional ways to condition yourself for success.

    Onward.

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    Source by Deb Bauer

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  • Why You Need to Express Emotion

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    When I was young I was taught that crying was not good. After all, the message was that if you cry too much, “you’re going to get sick.” Crying, especially in public, definitely was bad news. In short, crying, even when grieving, was considered to be a sign of weakness. If you were going to cry, then do so in private.

    Through the years this and many other natural ways of showing emotion have been stifled by many of the celebrities who always assume a stoic pose when appearing on camera. (I always remember the death of President Kennedy and the way Jackie showed little emotion during the funeral and on TV.)

    Many additional beliefs about expressing emotion were looked down upon for years as western culture had adopted the “rugged individualism” view of dealing with life in all its manifestations. Expressing emotion was out and being strong was definitely in. Keeping emotion within is presently the cultural norm.

    However, psychology and the social sciences have shown time and time again the importance of expressing, in some form, what is happening inside; it can actually save your life. If you have been trained by the authority figures in your life to suppress your feelings or if you are unable to cry (much to do with unconscious beliefs instilled early in life) when one might be expected to do so, consider the following.

    1. We are built to vocalize feelings and tell our stories. This is an inherent and normal human response. Its purpose is to relieve the stress of trauma and massive change that occur in every life. There is a basic human need to externalize the pressure and pain that develops within.

    2. What is the alternative when we bottle the anxiety, anger, fear, guilt or pain that is generated by a major loss? The physical self pays a huge price to perform this task. Stress hormones go into overdrive and every cell in the body is affected. I repeat, every cell in the body is heavily stressed. Energy stores are depleted.

    3. A more vicious result of stuffing feelings is that our unconscious and our memory banks keep them forever alive in full force. Consequently, we are easily thrown into deep pain throughout life when something we see in a movie or on a TV show or read in the paper, cues up the terrible feelings and memories we never dealt with.

    So what can you do? The obvious answer is to find a way to tell your story of pain and disappointment. If you don’t have a best friend who is a good long-term listener, (a resource we all need to develop), then seek out a counselor, clergy person, or support group. You also can express feelings through writing, drawing, painting or sculpting. Reach out to God to unload your burden. You may need several avenues of release.

    Give in to the natural inclination to share the pain of loss. There is nothing weak about doing so. It is not merely highly therapeutic, it will lead to insights into your loss and how to cope with it (verbalizing our feelings often leads to new interpretations and thoughts). When appropriate, request your good listener to give you valuable feedback.

    Make every effort to change the pattern of the way you deal with loss and change and encourage your children to be open with you about their feelings. See the process as wisdom seeking and in making wise choices. Let periodic expression, where you plumb the deepest depths of your feelings, become part of your long-term healing process. We all need the nurturance and feeling of community that sharing feelings naturally brings forth.

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    Source by Lou LaGrand

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