Author: Abdul-Qadir

  • Book Summary: Unlimited Wealth – Theory and Practice of Economic Alchemy by Paul Zane Pilzer

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    The basics of economics are supply, demand and scarcity. Economics best describes how to divide these scarce resources up amongst a growing population. Paul Pilzer takes a very different approach to Economics. He believes in Unlimited Wealth and shows examples of why technology and human ingenuity are the keys that unlock that wealth.

    Why is this important to me?

    I am not doing this summary to waste your time. It is my vision to provide concise action steps that you can adopt right now to enhance your financial life. Paul Pilzer writes of unlimited wealth creation. His spin is Alchemy is the creation of wealth while Economics is simply the method for moving it around.

    I am really intrigued by the concept of unlimited wealth creation. If you look at human progress in free societies, the real difference has been in creation. Commodities and resources are in fact finite but the way we use them is what is unlimited. The ideas are unlimited. An acre of land today produces far more food than an acre a generation ago.

    Unlimited Wealth discusses several major topics. For the sake of time, I will review the salient points outlined by Paul.

    1. Supply Side Alchemy – The Wealth Equation: W=PT^n – This equation means – W (Wealth) = P (Physical Resources) x T (Technology) to the nth power where n is the effects of the technological advances. The expansion of physical resources depends on the technological advances. Supply side Alchemy consists of three laws. The key to this equation is what Paul calls the third law of Alchemy – The rate at which a society’s technology advances is determined by the relative level of its ability to process information. Let’s look at how society has progressed based on the third law of Alchemy. Humans figured out how to write, then the printing press was created, then the computer was created and purchasable by the average consumer. Now we have the internet, social media, search engines and everything else to share knowledge. The speed of information exchange is exponential hence so is our level of wealth.

    2. Demand Side Alchemy – The demand side alchemy consists of the fourth and fifth laws. The fourth law states – By providing us with new products and processes that change the way in which we live, technology determines what constitutes a need, and hence the nature of consumer demand. In a nutshell, demand can be created by creating and innovating new products. Apple is on its way to be the first company to hit a Trillion dollar valuation. All of their products were created first and then the demand came from it.

    3. Sixth Law of Alchemy – The immediate economic potential for an individual, an industry or society can be explained by examining the technology gap, the best practices possible with current knowledge, and the practices in actual use. This is important today because China and India are way ahead of the U.S. in terms of science and math. Technology strives on science and math and societies that adapt it faster will create wealth faster. This is where the balance of power can shift over time.

    Unlimited Wealth is definitely a controversial study based on regular Economics theory. Since I am in the technology field, I agree with Paul that Unlimited Wealth can be created through technology and innovation. Products are being created right now that no market exists. Some of these products will fall flat while others will explode. Take a look at Facebook. This company came from nowhere and is now valued at over $50 billion.

    I hope you have found this short summary useful. The key to any new idea is to work it into your daily routine until it becomes habit. Habits form in as little as 21 days. One thing you can take away from this book is scarcity is a negative mind set. I say this because if you believe in unlimited wealth creation then ideas will flourish.

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    Source by Joe Mosed

    Views: 0

  • The Versatile Ranch Style House

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    Over the years I've designed and drawn many different styles of homes for clients. I've had the honor of making plans for stately Colonial Manors, Cottages, Modern Contemporary, Federal Style, Mediterranean, etc., but the most versatile of all these layouts is the American Ranch Style home.

    Conceived in the US in the 1920s, and patterned after the Midwestern homes use by ranchers and farmers in the late 19th and early 20th century. Hence the name: "Rancher". The Rancher was also known as the "Tract House" because this was the style of choice for developers creating large sub divisions. Thousands of these homes were built in subdivisions across the nation. If you've ever watched the movie, "It's a Wonderful Life" starring Jimmy Stewart at Christmas time, about 45 minutes into the move you'll see a whole bunch of these Ranch styles in the back ground.

    Simpler because of its single story design, the Ranch House can be made into a large rectangle with a long central hallway. But the house can also be built in a "T" or "C" shaped configuration, a "L", and even an "E" or even a double "E" layout. This gives this design an ability to adapt to the needs of the family living in it and fit the terrain, no matter what the topography of the lot it's built on.

    The foundations or basements are also a simple matter for these homes. That's because we have the simple rectangular design. With a rectangular layout, there's always an easy way to support the floor system with all the piers or post evenly spaced.

    Roofs on this style also can vary in shape. The most common roof for the main rectangle of the home is the simple gable, hip, half hip, or even a flat roof. But if the other appendages are added, you can have multiple roofs in whatever direction the homes extensions happen to go. I've seen some built with angled appendages at 30 to 45 degrees.

    But the design even lends itself to more class by adding a steep roof pitch that another ½ story can be added to the house making it a story and a half. From that steep roof, dormers can be placed to add even more beauty to the home. One of the prettiest Ranchers I've ever seen had this steep roof configuration with a large center dormer and smaller dormers on each side of the large one. It was also decorated out with many of the classic brick work, columns, and trims of the colonial homes. It was a sight to behold and the owner was very proud.

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    Source by Tim J. Davis

    Views: 0

  • Healing Grief & Loss – A Fresh Start

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    Every Day Can Be A Fresh Start

    “There are no constraints on the human mind, no walls around the human spirit, no barriers to our progress except those we ourselves erect.”

    ~ Ronald Reagan

    7 DAILY FRESH START BULLET POINTS can help you heal your grief and loss. You have special unique empowerment to seize the moment again and again. Erect possibilities. Erect personal healing solutions. Erect your own peace. Erect hope. Every hour of every day can be a fresh start. Your condition may limit what you are able and desire to perform. However, constraints, walls or barriers don’t need to be in your mind. The opportunities for healing and progress toward a better you are abundant even if done in small baby steps; and on a few occasions one step forward and two steps back. There are keys to minimize the constraints in your mind. 7 must-consider steps to make every day a fresh start follow:

    *Fresh Start #1 Erect Possibilities

    “Seeds of great discoveries are constantly floating around us,

    but they only take root in minds well prepared to receive them.”

    ~ Joseph Henry

    Your grief loss happening may have sent you on a personal detour filled with discouragement and despair. On this detour confusion and hopelessness may jump in front of you on every turn of your healing journey. This is the essential time to explore all possibilities to reconcile your sorrow and grief. Undiscovered possibilities are available. Now is time to be open to receive all possible healing opportunities. Will you prepare to receive them? Search diligently for unrecognized or hidden possibilities.

    *Fresh Start #2 Erect Personal Healing Solutions

    Especially after a horrendous grief experience your life can be confusing and without meaning. It is essential to recognize you bring the meaning to every living moment. The meaning of your life is what you ascribe it to be. Being alive and proactive determines your healing solutions.

    *Fresh Start #3 Erect Your Own Peace

    You are absolutely correct. SOMETIMES LIFE IS TOUGH! In fact, life is not always fair. To be at peace because of grief circumstances can be extremely challenging. Finding your own personal peace can be enhanced by counting all the reasons why you can be grateful. Writing down a gratitude list can buoy up your spirit. No matter your condition after your grief there are blessings you can count. Counting your blessings can bring you peace.

    *Fresh Start #4 Erect Hope

    “When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems you cannot hold on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time the tide will turn.”

    ~ Harriet Beecher Stowe

    Hope and peace go together. Nonetheless, without hope you cannot have personal peace. Hope is a powerful and vital quality to own and magnify. Consider all the ways you might create hope in your attitude and in your actions. Holding hope in a strong grasp every day will turn your tide to more happiness, hope and peace.

    *Fresh Start #5 Erect Barrier Deletes

    Learn to erase negative thinking. Erase hopelessness from your daily thinking. Everyone gets discouraged. Life grief experiences may be joined with partners of despair, confusion, uncertainty, and even anger. Were it that you could simple press a delete button and erase all things that are barriers to your happiness. Essential to your transformation from your grieving experience to a happier state of mind are behaviors that will eradicate negative thinking. It begins and ends with your attitude. Others can help but you are the one who must press the delete button over and over again until your mind is full of positive thinking. You can.

    *Fresh Start #6 Erect Empowerment Discovery

    I like to think of a tool box inside each of us. Perhaps a hammer, chisel, screwdriver, measuring tape, a pair of pliers, a small level, to mention a few. I dare say it has been a long time since you have used all of those tools – maybe never. However, the time may very well come when a simple use of a pair of pliers will be vital to you. Just like the foregoing tools mentioned are empowerment tools for your mind and attitude. Perhaps you have not needed them before. Maybe they were not needed until your grief loss experience. They might not have ever been used. You may need to dig deep within. If you do you will discover empowerment strength you were unaware you always had. Asking again and again, what can I do will help you discover your personal needed empowerment. Strength will begin to grow in your mind.

    *Fresh Start #7 Erect A Daily Fresh Start

    Even without a horrendous grief experience a fresh start can be invigorating and revitalizing. Erect each day with a fresh attitude of positive possibilities and opportunities. Seek for all healing solutions. Count your blessings. Delete all negative thinking. Search for your own empowerment. Begin each day with a positive attitude. Think about how you can gain more hope with a daily fresh healing attitude.

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    Source by Duane Marchant

    Views: 0

  • The History of the Modern Money Clip

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    The history of the money clip is not a very long one since the need for a them only arose with the invention for paper money. Paper currency was first developed in China during the 7th century due to shortage of copper. Before this time ones wealth was worn around the neck in the form of necklaces the wealthier you were the heavier the chain you wore. This became physically uncomfortable and problematic, so the Chinese developed a system where they could leave their coins with a person of trust in return for a paper note. They could get their money back by showing the note at a later time. This practice was later discontinued and paper money doesn’t arise again until 1690 in Europe. During this time England produced paper money to facilitate the movement of goods and services while waging colonial war in faraway Canada. It was much easier to move paper money then large amounts of heavy coins.

    So as paper money gained popularity the need to hold ones money became a necessity. The first patent for a money clip was patented on May 7 1901 by B.G Deovich for a safety holder for paper money. This clamping device held the money and also had an attached chain to secure to and convenient button. The ones we know today was not invented until 1931 when L. weeks applied for the patent that we know today as the modern money clip. Before this time paper money was hap hazardously carried in pocket of in change purses or in folded pieces of fabric.

    Today there many styles and types they are made of different metals and materials and come in many different styles to fit anyone’s taste. Some money clips have time pieces on them; some have secret compartments, some even have knives in them or flash lights. They come all metals from platinum encrusted with diamond to silver and gold and the more readily accessible stainless steel. Stainless steel is prized for its durability and low cost and is the most well known of all the materials. Many groups such as the Mansions carry money clips with special logos on them. They can are used as an extension of one’s personality or to show affection or affiliation with an affinity group such as sports teams or military units. They are given as both corporate and personal gifts because they can easily be engraved and made as personal or impersonal as needed.

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    Source by Brenda L Hopkins

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  • 10 Lazy Man’s Secrets To Online Riches

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    Nobody wants to stay poor forever. Everyone wants to earn to fulfill his needs, and at the same time have some savings. In most of the cases, the amount of money that a person makes depends on the hours he put in to his endeavor. Many a times we find ourselves lagging behind in making enough money so that we can fulfill all our needs rather than a few.

    Since time immemorial, men having been looking for secrets to riches, be it a treasure hunt, invading places, going through old maps and scripts, and what not. But not many have been successful in their quest to their steps to riches.

    But what if we can use some technique and have a proper planning to make more money than what we currently earn? That too, after a minimum initial hard work, we can keep lazing around but still be able to earn massively? Anyone would be lured. There are quite a few way that can make your steps to riches with smallest of efforts.

    The growing use of internet and the availability of information have worked wonders in lot of people’s life. The secrets to riches are to tap into this ever-growing market and use the potential it has to develop your business plan. The quick and easy setups, with absolutely no extra investment and quality content could lead you to earn a handsome amount of money every day. These secrets to riches are any lazy man’s dream, and it has proved its worth over the time. Let us try to find out what are the strategies and steps to riches these successful and rich men follow and earn as much for ourselves.

    1. The ability to make money is the most important step towards it. Concentrate more on the quality of the content rather quantity and you have taken the step toward success.

    2. Your ability to gel with online marketers helps a lot. The more networking you do, more are your chances of getting premium return from your website.

    3. Whatever product you sell you must have an authoritative approach in determining your superiority and assertiveness in the online area. This will reduce the competition and make your website best in class.

    4. Now that you have understood the basic requirements, you need to choose a niche for your website. Choose something that is creating a lot of interest but does not have much information on them. This is one of your secrets to riches.

    5. Research your website name and avoid any overlapping of names that might occur. That will divide the attention of the people between the two and lose out on opportunity.

    6. Seek proper guidance. You can do this yourself over the internet as there are thousands of tutorials or guides to help you set up the business.

    7. Find out what appeals to the crowd most. Try to provide for people with their requirements. In no time you will see people flocking towards your website.

    8. Set yourself apart. This will maintain the uniqueness of your website and the traffic will flow incessantly resulting in bigger revenues.

    9. Always try to provide an ‘order now’ button in your website. This will help you earn the referral and your credentials will definitely improve. This is one of the important steps to riches.

    10. Sit back after you have invested enough time to build your online presence. As you start to get more visitors you can see the money going up.

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    Source by Swati D Banerjee

    Views: 0

  • How Dirty Bunks At Summer Camp Can Teach You How To Heal

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    When I was a child and a young adult, I spent twenty summers at Camp Ramah, a network of Hebrew-speaking summer camps located throughout North and South America, Israel, Russia and even Eastern Europe. I was a camper, counselor, teacher, division head, Camp Rabbi and assistant camp director at Ramah in the Poconos and Ramah Massachusetts. Aside from having a wonderful time learning all about what it meant to be a “good Jewish boy,” I now realize that it was at Camp Ramah that I learned a valuable life-lesson which would teach me-and you– how to heal from the pain of loss.

    Surprisingly enough, I learned that lesson from our dirty bunks!

    Every single day, our bunk needed to be cleaned, except for Shabbat, our Sabbath. Chores were divvied up, sometimes using a daily “job Wheel of Fortune,” sometime a weekly cleaning assignment, and sometimes the counselor simply told us what to do. No one liked to clean the bunk, but from bunk clean-up, I learned my first, and perhaps most important healing lesson: mourners need to clean out the losses from their lives, to make room for the life of joy and celebration that is waiting to enter. It wasn’t about the clean-up at all, it was about having something to do each day that would help us reach our goal. We were never allowed not to have a job, that was not an option. Each day we had to actually do something, we couldn’t just sit on our beds and read comic books, and we couldn’t just lie in bed all day!

    Now I am a man, and I do not see dirt, whether it was in my bunk at camp or in my home now. But somewhere in the recesses of my mind, I knew then, and know now, that there was indeed dirt which we needed to clean up and remove. Though I mostly didn’t want to clean, I knew it was necessary.

    You could say that when loss enters our lives, our life-bunks become covered with dirt. The dirt won’t go away by itself, it needs to be swept out. That’s why routine tasks are crucial-they help us get out of bed every morning and tend to the chore of cleaning our bunks. Or our lives..

    If you’re like me, you would sometimes rather not do anything to heal, perhaps just wait until “the right time comes along.” It’s too hard, or it hurts too much, or I don’t like making changes so I’ll just stay the way I am right now-as if you could…

    I know people, and so do you, who are still grieving a loss from ten, twenty or even thirty years ago. I know some one whose husband died ten years ago, and to this day has still not emptied out his clothes closet. When I asked her why not, her answer was: I like to feel that he’s still here with me. Okay, I get that, but for her, he is still alive while she is drowning in sadness, and that is not how life is supposed to be. If she cannot clear out his clothes, then she cannot ever begin to heal, because for her, he hasn’t truly died, and she has not yet said goodbye to him. It’s easier, she thinks, to do nothing. Except we know the truth. Doing nothing is worse than just doing nothing. Doing nothing only makes it harder and harder to begin to sweep out that dirt and let the beauty of life enter into our lives.

    So at camp, the dirt needs to be cleaned up and swept out, or else the bunk will get even dirtier. The lesson is clear. When loss comes, we need to similarly begin to clean up, do what needs to be done, and let the healing begin.

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    Source by Dr. Mel Glazer

    Views: 0

  • Whatever Happened to Customer Service?

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    In the old movie, Miracle on 34th Street, the Macy’s Santa sends customers to rival store Gimbels for products that Macy’s does not have. After a management outcry, it then turns out that customers really appreciate this service and become more loyal to Macy’s than ever before.

    Retailers today have forgotten that lesson. Everybody is looking to cut costs. Customer service is no longer considered a revenue generator, so it’s one of the first things on the chopping block when a retailer starts tightening its belt.

    Good customer service is good business. It creates repeat customers. Repeat customers are what every retailer wants because it is far less expensive from a marketing standpoint to sell to a former customer than to bring in new customers.

    Retailers no longer know what makes “good” customer service. The general feeling is that if the product leaves the store and does not come back, everything is fine. Customer service is only for the “problems” and the job of customer service is to make the problems go away at the least possible cost. The less interaction between the store and the customer, the better.

    Superior customer service demands extensive interaction between the customer and the retailer. In my Internet company we look for every possible opportunity to contact and engage the customer. Once a customer has placed an order, the company will contact them at least four times during the 4 week period between the sale and the delivery. The first contact is to acknowledge the order and thank the customer for her (or his) purchase. At that time the customer receives information about the production and delivery process and they are encouraged to call if there are any questions. A second contact is made shortly before production is complete The third contact is made when the product is actually shipped. At this time, there is a detailed description of what the delivery process will entail. There is also a tracking number provided so that the product can be tracked by the customer during the shipping process. The fourth contact is after delivery when each customer is contacted to find out whether they are happy with the product or whether some additional followup is needed.

    When we receive a request for one of our free catalogs, we send it along with a letter noting that we also offer free fabric swatches and free design advice. When an order is placed, we acknowledge the order electronically, then send an email personally thanking the customer. We notify them when the product (in our case sofas) is about to be shipped. We notify them again after it has shipped. Most important, we contact the customer after the product has been received to make sure that everything is OK and that there are no problems. In doing this, sometimes there is a minor problem that the customer might not have mentioned but which distracts from the enjoyment of the sofa — for example a cushion feels too firm. We send out free, softer replacement cushions. The result is that instead of having a silent but disappointed customer, we now have a very happy buyer who enthusiastically recommends us to friends and family. The cost of the extra cushions is a marketing cost.

    The secret behind outstanding customer service is simply to put yourself in the place of the customer. What would you want the company to do if you were the customer? Treat the customer the way you want to be treated.

    1. Answer telephone calls promptly. It is amazing how grateful a customer can be when they realize they are speaking with a real live knowledgeable person who can answer their questions.

    2. Respond to emails and phone messages promptly. All emails phone calls should be handled as quickly as possible, hopefully in less than one hour.

    3. Be honest. It is amazing how often salespeople feel that telling the truth gets in the way of making a sale. If a microfiber fabric already has a stain protector built in and does not need the optional spray protector, tell the customer. Once you have saved them from spending an unnecessary $50, they will trust you completely and might even be willing to forgive minor glitches that may pop up. If a sofa won’t be finished by the promised deadline, call as soon as you are aware of the problem.

    4. Under-promise — If a delivery will take 3 weeks, estimate 4. Customers are usually delighted when something is ready ahead of schedule.

    5. Maximize contact with the customer. This does not mean sending frequent ads or spam. It means keeping the customer informed of the progress of their order up to and after delivery.

    6. Be knowledgeable about your products and your company. If you don’t know the answer to a question, find out quickly.

    7. Surprise and amaze your customer — give them something they do not expect. This can be as simple as delivering your product one week eaarly, or it can involve giving an upgrade at no charge. This is particularly important when an error has been made and you are trying to correct it. Go farther than your customer expects and they will change from disgruntled critics to enthusiastic supporters.

    Retail stores have been cutting back on customer service for years. As competition grows and profit margins shrink, customer service is one of the first places to cut back. Everyone who has ever tried to call a computer company for technical assistance and winds up talking to someone from India knows the problem. Corporate bean counters forget that with good customer service you can earn better margins. You are not forced to fight over who can offer the lowest price. Besides, it’s just nicer working in a friendly environment. When you have happy customers, you have happy employees.

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    Source by Jeff Frank

    Views: 0

  • Discover How to Become Rich, Famous & Successful With a Modeling Career

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    The road to becoming rich, famous and successful in modeling is not for everyone though. In the old days you had to be extra extra skinny in order to become a rich and famous model. Today however there are far more modeling avenues that entice many looks and body types.

    You may have looked at a fashion magazine and have a pretty good idea of what modeling is. To get a good look into the requirements of modeling you may want to catch an episode of Americas Next Top Model. Most of the models on the tv show are high fashion models, but you may be wanting to get into another type of modeling like plus size industry. Modeling is everywhere we go and look. Only you know what kind of model you could be but be truthful with you self.

    Before you jump into pursuing a modeling career you need to make sure your are doing it for the right reasons. If not you will misguide yourself and will not make it to where you want. If you think modeling is a good way to jump start your singing or acting career you best think about it again. People with this attitude rarely make it very far in modeling. All the top modeling professionals frown upon people like this everyday. To become rich, famous and successful in a modeling career you will need to have dedication and passion.

    If you are male you will need to step outside of your shell to succeed. You see more female models than you do male models. Do not let this get you down by thinking you have to display big muscles. Modeling has went through many changes since the early days. Over time new genres, styles and looks have been added with even more on the way. You just might have that new style consumers are trying to find. You just never know in our ever changing world.

    To be successful in a career of modeling you will need a high level of self confidence and ambition. No matter if you are female, male or what your body type is. When you enter into modeling you will have to work extra hard to be be transformed into a popular well known face. Be careful not to get ties up with an agency that does not treat or handle their clients honestly and respectfully. Every good agency will not need you to give them money. They will earn money once you land your first modeling gig.

    When you find open calls make sure you go and do not talk yourself into not going no matter what you are thinking. Just do it. You see an open call is just as good as open houses where interested models are invited to be interviewed. You need to dress in clothing that will exhibit your body type and features. You will also want to pick an outfit out that is fashionable. This is your chance to prove yourself to the representatives of the agency. You will not stand out to them if you just wear your normal everyday clothes. To become famous you have to act like your famous in order to become rich, famous and successful in modeling.

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    Source by Dennis J. Cole

    Views: 0

  • How Do I Convince My Husband That I’ve Changed My Ways So He’ll Give Me A Second Chance?

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    It’s an awful feeling to be looking back on your marriage with negative hindsight. Sometimes, we don’t see things clearly enough until we’re faced with actually losing them for good. I recently heard from a wife who was experiencing this first hand. Her husband had left her after finally becoming tired of her constantly bending the truth, not treating him in a respectful way, acting irresponsibly, and taking him for granted.

    She said, in part: “I was furious with my husband when he left me. I was mad that he would give up on our marriage without giving me any warning first. But after I began to think clearly, I realized that he did give me plenty of warnings but I wasn’t always paying attention. I spent the money that he mostly earned like crazy and put us heavily into debt. I would bend the truth about my activities so I could keep on doing exactly what he wanted. He worked hard while I had the fun. If he mentioned not being happy about this to me, I’d call him a stick in the mud or asked him if he was my father. I flirted with other guys and didn’t show him the respect he deserved. He was nothing but loving, loyal, and good to me, but I didn’t fully appreciate him until now. So now I’m at the point where I fully realize my mistakes and am committed to changing my ways. I’ve gotten a better job and have stopped the spending, lying, and partying. But when I tell him this, he looks at me with doubt in his eyes and doesn’t make any further attempts to see me. If he would only give me a second chance, I could and would prove to him that our marriage could be different. Will he give me that second chance? How can I make sure that he does?” I’ll try to answer these questions below.

    Usually, In Order For Your Husband To Give You And Your Marriage A Second Chance, Several Things Need To Happen All At Once: Over time, it became pretty obvious that this wife was sincere. It has been months since her husband had left. And, during that time, she had gotten a job, adjusted her thinking and her behavior, and really embraced a new way of life that the husband had been encouraging and calling for all along.

    The wife was frustrated that she’d made all of these changes and yet, despite her repeatedly detailing her mistakes and how she had changed them, her husband still had not been receptive enough to give her another chance or to come home. In fact, he’d started talking about divorce, which was especially upsetting to her.

    This wife didn’t understand that in order for your husband to give you a second chance or to be open to a reconciliation, several things need to happen, as follows:

    1. Your husband needs to completely believe that, not only have you really and truly changed, but that you understand why you acted the way that you did and are completely remorseful for it. He needs to believe that you now see the attributes in him that you missed before so that you won’t continue to take him for granted.

    2. Your husband needs to believe that the changes that you made are lasting and that you didn’t only “change” for his benefit. Many husbands suspect that as soon as he agrees to give you another chance or comes back home, you’ll eventually get comfortable again and resort back to your old ways so that he’s having to deal with the same behaviors over and over again without any escape.

    3. Once your husband believes that you’ve made lasting realizations and changes, then he has to perceive that continuing in a relationship or marriage with you is going to be better for him (or make him more happy) than to continue to be alone. Sure, he might believe that it’s possible that you’ve changed. But sometimes, he still feels that too much negativity has happened between you to really salvage the marriage. Or, he doubts if things can ever really “be the same” again.

    Identifying And Addressing Any Doubts That Your Husband Might Have About Giving You A Second Chance. Where Is His Reluctance And His Resistance Coming From? Admittedly, I didn’t personally know either the husband or the wife in this scenario. So, I couldn’t pinpoint which of the above 3 factors was keeping the husband from believing his wife or from giving her a second chance. But, if the wife truly observed the husband’s behaviors and listened to the clues he was likely offering her, then she should be able to figure out what truly stood in her way.

    Most of the time, this is a gradual process because you have to hang in there in order to keep going long enough to over come what is usually a husband’s considerable resistance and doubt. In truth, this couple had been married for years and yet the wife’s changes had only been around for a few months. The husband likely still had his doubts that the changes were sincere or were truly going to last. And he may have also had his doubts if the two of them could be happy again after he’d walked out on her and given up on the marriage.

    The best way to address these doubts was to just continue on with what she was doing and to give the process time to work. Because with time, the husband could likely see that she truly was sincere and absolutely meant what she said. It helps if you can somehow let your husband know that you are incorporating these changes even when he’s not watching you. If a mutual friend or family member comments about the changes in you without your being present, this can help.

    Here’s one more point that I would like to make. It’s entirely possible that the husband was slowing warming to the idea that his wife could change, but that he still had his doubts that the marriage could truly be a genuinely easy or happy one. The wife admitted to me that sometimes things were tense when they were together because she was frustrated that her plan didn’t seem to be working. This was something that needed to be avoided in the future.

    It’s vitally important that your husband sees you being light hearted, fun loving, and very easy to be around. The relationship and the conversations should be light and should not feel awkward or forced. I know that this sometimes takes some doing, but if every interaction feels or reads negatively, then this will often just reinforce the husband’s belief that the marriage is too far gone to save.

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    Source by Leslie Cane

    Views: 0